This is dedicated to KitKatCullen13 for her AWESOMENESS. You have to read her stories, they are so cool.

Yay, reviews

I'm going to continue with this story but I might not update as regularly.

Chapter 2: The meadow

B.P.O.V

The next few months past incredibly slowly. Without Him here to make my life interesting, it was worthless.

September.

Gone.

October.

Gone.

December.

Gone.

January.

Gone.

February…..

Going.

Each day the pain grew worse, ripping the hole in my cheats wider, with every though every fantasy Charlie's gun looked more and more inviting.

Everything I saw the colour topaz or a glimpse of bronze hair, my heart speed up and my breath hitched. But I was always disappointed and then the pain would come.

The pain was excruciating, indescribable. I was sure I would die from it.

It splintered my heart into little shards, scattering the pieces across my broken body.

My brain didn't function any more, it didn't have to, as it unconsciously went through its everyday routine half asleep. My heart? I didn't have one.

I didn't care anymore, there was no one to impress.

I didn't care about the way I looked. I didn't care about the way people looked at me when they passed my in the school corridors, dressed in black. I didn't even care Charlie thought when he saw the dark shadows under my eyes and my Zombie-like expressions.

I have had enough of life, of people using me and then walking all over me like He did, of people who judged you before they knew you. I had given up.

But somewhere deep down, I was still fighting. I still had the will to get out of bed in the morning and to go to school to face the horrible people there.

I had the will not to pull the trigger when I held Charlie's gun to my head.

Something else deep inside of me knew I had to get over Him, to get on with my life, to stop moping around. But I never would, I knew that.

He was my idle, my saviour, my best friend and most of all, my lover. I would always be his even though He would not always be mine.

But He had moved on, so that meant I could. He was probably with a beautiful, immortal Vampire right now, where he belonged. I had hoped that I would be that Vampire, that He would change me. But how wrong was I?

I had thought of them as my family. They had all left me, they had gone and that's not what family dose to one-another. They had officially disowned me.

I managed a humourless chuckle through the tear that spilled out of my eyes and down my face.

I don't know why the even bothered to act that long, for the time that we were together.

I had to forget about them, they completely ruined my life and my future.

I was to dependant on them for my own good.

But the question was why would I want to forget them?

They were gods. Their beauty, kindness and immortality, they were truly something wonderful something that brought happiness to my life, then snatched it back and ran away with it.

It was either Forgive and Forget or Remember and Regret.

That's why I was going to Our Meadow.

It was the only place of that I could truly let go of Him.

I didn't mind how many times I tripped or stumbled up the path. Or how many times I grazed my knees or scratched my hands. I had to make it.

The forest was damp with morning dew and the birds chirped, welcoming the sunrise.

I had got out of the house early because if my calculations were correct it would take me 3 hours to do the climb and then 3 hours back down and I didn't really know where I was going.

I was breathing heavily by the time I came out of the fog bank, I sat down on a log that had fallen across the pathway.

I sighed as my muscles relaxed into the wood.

I got an apple out of my bag and bit into it, chewing nosily. I finished it and stood up ready to continue the journey.

I looked up ahead and saw a clearing, my heart skipped a beat as I picked up my pace. Could it be? Am I here?

I pulled myself up and looked around. This couldn't be our meadow, everything was dead. The flowers had wilted and the lush green grass had gone, replaced with brown hay. Weeds had sprouted up, strangling all the other plants.

I spun around slowly, looking at what the lovely sanctuary had become. I could feel the sadness and abandonment, the anger the pain.

I barely recognised it. It wasn't a happy place anymore.

I felt tears running down my face. I dropped to the ground and curled up, clutching my chest. I was used to the pain now.

"Bella Swan"

I wiped away my tears and looked up.

Laurent stood on the other side of the meadow, Black eyes sparkling. Maybe the Cullens were here to. Standing up I looked around hoping to see them.

Nope. It was just me and Laurent.

I tried to smile at him but it came out as a grimaces.

"Hello" I said.

"I'm surprised to see you here Bella, I didn't think the Cullens would let you out of their sight" Laurent said walking towards me. Tears were running down my face again but I wiped them away.

"Weren't you like one of their pets?" He continued walking towards me.

"Why are you here?" I asked before he could say anything else.

"I am here as a favour to Victoria" I shuddered at her name

"She wants me to see how heavily guarded you are, how well you are protected. You see, she is coming to kill you for what Edward did to James, mate for mate"

Victoria was coming to kill me? Death would be a blessing.

"But" Laurent said "I see Edward has left you so there is no need to kill you, you are suffering enough already"

They were just going to leave me alone?

"Victoria want you to suffer forever like she is, mate-less"

I gasped, He was going to change me, and I was gong to get what I wished for. But no-one to share it with.

Laurent was suddenly in front of me "Sorry Bella" He said before biting into my neck.

The Cullens told me that the change would be painful. I was starting to wonder if everything they told me was lies. The pain was a small throb all over my body, it was nothing compared to Him leaving me.

I felt myself hit the ground. I heard the sound of tearing flesh and animalistic growls. I smelt fire and smoke. I didn't know what was happening but I didn't have enough energy to look up.

"Bella, what happened? Are you okay?"

I saw Jacob, he was hovering over me with a worried look in his eyes.

"She has been bitten" Someone else said.

"She's one of them Jake"

"I say we kill her"

Growls

"We can't kill her, she's my friend"

They were arguing over me.

"Don't leave me Jake" I whispered before I blacked out.

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