6
Alex sat on the dark doorstep of a house opposite of the club, the hood of her sweater pulled deep over her face. She had been sitting there for over an hour now, staring at the bouncers guarding the entrance. She watched dozens of people entering the club, people leaving the club. But Marissa wasn't among them.
When Alex had found her jeep close to the club, she had parked Marissa's Mustang somewhat further away in a less shabby corner and had then walked back to the club. She had sat down on this doorstep and was now still sitting there, watching the entrance restlessly.
Alex didn't know what to do. She considered going in and searching for Marissa, but the risk of being seen by her was too big. And in addition, the thought of being close to dozens of unfamiliar people seemed strangely repulsive to her. So she just sat and waited… and waited… and waited… At some point a man passed by, taking large gulps of a beer. It was then that Alex felt her own thirst stronger than ever, though it was not the taste of beer that she longed for. The thought of blood made her lick her lips unconsciously. A second later Alex was disgusted at herself and forced her mind back on keeping watch on the entrance.
Suddenly, Alex sat up straight, her green eyes sparkling in the darkness. A young woman came staggering out of the club, clearly drunk, and headed down the street. Alex felt her heart break when she saw the state Marissa was in, and felt it break even more, knowing she could not go over and help her. But nevertheless, seeing Marissa - alive- took a load of her mind.
Alex saw the bouncers exchanging grins and felt like punching them both until there was nothing left for them to grin about. But she pulled herself together and instead focused on Marissa, following her closely. To her immense relief they reached the jeep without any further incidents.
Alex watched as Marissa curled up in the front seat of the car, mumbling something. She didn't get all the words, but she clearly heard Marissa say her own name – and she felt a sting in the heart. She still loves me, Alex thought, happy and tremendously sad at the same time.
She waited a few minutes until she was sure Marissa had drifted off into a deep sleep. Then she took out a blanket from the back of the jeep and slowly went up to the driver's seat.
Alex just stood there for a further few minutes, watching her lost love sleep. She cautiously opened the door and held her breath as she bent forward. She reached out her hand, softly brushing over Marissa's cheek. Alex was suddenly caught by a feeling of such strong desire to be near her, she could hardly hold herself back from pulling Marissa into an embrace. But she forced herself to pull back her hand and quickly covered Marissa with the blanket. Then she bent over once more and kissed her girl on the forehead. Marissa's smell immediately filled her and she felt the world around her beginning to spin faster and faster…
Alex pulled back and silently closed the door. She took a few steps backwards and slowly everything around her began to come back into focus.
Alex took another few steps away from the jeep and lent back against a tree. She closed her eyes for a moment, still dazed from having been so close to Marissa. Then she turned her attention back to the sleeping woman, her green eyes flashing with new energy. This would be a long night, but Alex didn't mind one bit.
Alex had lost track of any count of time, but it was still in the middle of the night when she saw a man, smelling of beer and cigarettes, come their way. He saw Marissa sleeping in the jeep and immediately headed towards her, throwing his empty beer can aside.
"Just what I need now," he slurred, grinning wickedly.
Alex came forward out of the shadows, her hands clenched to fists.
"You!" she called out. "Stay away."
The man threw her a quick glance. "Get lost, girl."
He continued his way towards Marissa when his way was suddenly blocked by a heavily breathing blonde, anger evident in every single inch of her face.
"Stay. Away," Alex hissed again.
The man started laughing and tried to push past Alex, but then found himself staring at a long knife in the young woman's hand.
There was a moment of silence, then the man laughed his dirty laugh again. "You sure you're brave enough to use that, honey? Come on, give knife to uncle, then he play with you and other girlie."
His laughter turned into a shriek of pain, when Alex thrust the knife into his left shoulder.
Within a second, Alex had pulled it out again and stared at the man who was now holding his bleeding shoulder.
"For the last time," Alex hissed. "Stay away."
The man looked back at her, his face showing a mixture of incredulity and anger. "You're going to regret--"
The man broke off and fear replaced his previous emotions, as Alex raised the bloody blade to her mouth and licked it clean.
The taste of blood added desire to Alex' anger and Alex' eyes dropped from her opponent's face to his neck. The man watched in horror as Alex' eyes flashed red and she let the knife fall to the floor. He stumbled a few steps backwards and then turned around and ran away, still holding his bleeding shoulder.
Alex stared after him and felt her anger reach an intensity she had never felt before – and she would have run after him, had she not heard Marissa stir in her sleep at that moment. She turned to the sleeping beauty and felt her anger immediately begin to lessen. She shot a last glance after the man, then looked back to Marissa. No, she would not leave her, not for any dumb reason. She looked down at the knife and suddenly realized what had just happened. She slowly sat down on the ground, leaning against the jeep's left front wheel. I just tasted human blood.
She gave the knife another glance. Victoria had given it to her, but just for the purpose of teaching her how to use one, so that she could one day help her with the vampire hunt.
Alex stared at the crimson drops on the ground where the man had stood.
And I liked it.
Alex remembered the feeling she'd had when anger had taken her over completely. She had been close to killing the man. And had she killed him, she would have drunk his blood, there was no sense in denying that.
Alex shivered. She was lucky her need for protecting Marissa had been stronger than her anger or even her thirst for blood.
Alex shivered again. I just tasted human blood, she thought again. And I liked it.
Alex got up quickly and ran towards the few trees next to the small parking lot. She retched, but found she was unable to throw up. Well why would that be, Alex thought ironically. I haven't eaten anything for more than a week. Great. So I can't even throw up when I feel like it.
"I fucking hate being a vampire!" Alex hissed, kicking at a trash can.
After taking a few moments to calm down again, Alex felt thirstier than ever. She forced all her thoughts concerning blood into the back of her mind and went back to the jeep. She picked up the knife and sat down next to the jeep again, holding the weapon in her hands openly.
This way she successfully prevented any other drunken men to come near her and Marissa.
The twitter of the birds announced the break of dawn a few hours later, and Alex drew back into the shadow of the trees.
It was only another few hours later when Marissa finally awoke. On seeing the brunette sitting up, Alex immediately left, heading towards the place she had parked Marissa's car. She knew Marissa would be okay now. At least for now.
She was relieved that the Mustang was still there and she wasted no time quickly getting in and driving home.
About an hour later, Alex parked the car in front of her apartment, exactly at the same spot where it had been before. She was relieved to see Marissa wasn't there yet, as she would surely have noticed the absence of her car.
Alex stood in front of her apartment, clueless of what to do now. It was almost noon and the sun stood high in the sky. She wanted to wait for Marissa and make sure she returned safely, but it was too risky for her to be seen in the bright sunlight.
Alex knew she should get back to the motel, but the same problem faced her here again. How was she supposed to get back to the motel – without a car – in the middle of the day? Someone was sure to see her.
Alex put her hands into her pockets, still clueless, and felt something hard against her fingers. Of course, that's it, Alex thought somewhat annoyed that she hadn't thought of her mobile earlier.
Little time later, Alex was sitting in the rental car next to Victoria.
"Thank you so much, I really have absolutely no clue what I would have done now without you."
Victoria flashed a quick smile at the younger girl beside her. "No problem. That's what friends are for."
Alex smiled back at her and for the first time in hours she felt herself relax again. Now that she was with Victoria again, she had the feeling she could put aside her worries and responsibilities – at least for a while. She closed her eyes and almost instantly fell into an exhausted sleep.
Victoria shot a sideways glance at Alex and sighed. There were a few drops of blood around Alex' mouth and a deep frown on her face. Alex had obviously had a rough night.
"We'll talk about it later," Victoria whispered to the sleeping girl. "I hope I can help you."
It was early in the night and Alex slowly approached her apartment, deep in thought.
She had talked to Victoria about last night's events. The older vampire had been surprised that Alex had managed to refrain from feeding on the man, and this had made Alex feel even more sick. She remembered the sudden impulse that had made her lick the blood off the knife... She had been so close to killing a human, to drinking his blood. Too close.
All afternoon long Alex hadn't been able to quite shut away her anxiety. She was sure Marissa had been okay –at least physically– when she had left that morning… But what if Marissa didn't go home?
So Alex had anxiously waited for the sun to set and had then set out on foot over to her old neighbourhood, as Victoria needed the car herself.
Alex saw the jeep parked next to the Mustang and sighed, relieved. She stood in front of her dark apartment and looked up at the dark sky. The moon was shining brightly and dozens of stars around it sparkled beautifully, reflected by a single tear on Alex' cheek.
Alex closed her eyes and enjoyed the beauty of the moment. The only sound heard was the crashing of the waves on the shore and as a soft breeze caressed Alex' face she sighed in contentment.
She slowly opened her eyes, just in time to see the curtains of the living room window move slightly. Coming back to her senses, Alex quickly scurried off the open space in front of the house and into the shadow of the trees.
Moments later the front door opened and Alex breathed in sharply. Marissa stood on the doorstep, only clad in a nightgown, and looked around, as if she was searching for something… or someone. Alex watched her face closely and saw excitement and hope give way to sadness.
Marissa left the doorstep and slowly walked forward until she stood there were Alex had been merely a minute ago.
"Where are you?" she whispered and Alex had to bite her lips to stop herself from calling out a response.
"God, Alex, what do I do know? Please, tell me what to do," Marissa whimpered into the night. "How am I supposed to go on without you?… I don't think I can."
Alex saw Marissa close her eyes and turn her head upwards, so that her face was illuminated by the moonlight.
"Don't give up, Marissa," Alex whispered, wishing she could just go up to Marissa and take her into her arms…
"What is life without you by my side?" Marissa's broken voice sent chills down Alex' spine.
"Don't give up, Marissa, please. Go on," Alex repeated softly.
Marissa's eyes shot open and she scanned the place around her, her eyes lingering on the trees Alex was standing behind.
"Marissa?" came a voice from the door, and both Alex and Marissa turned their heads to see Summer standing on the doorstep.
"Don't you want to come back inside?" Summer asked tentatively.
Marissa scanned the place again, before nodding slowly. She turned away and went back to the door, but before closing it she turned around once more. She looked up to the moon and then back to the place where she had stood before. Alex heard her sigh deeply and then the door shut away any further sounds and images.
Now it was Alex turn to sigh as she stared at the place where Marissa had stood, the place where she had stood herself before. If Summer had not come out… would Marissa have found her? Alex shuddered. She would never know.
Alex left her hiding spot and slowly walked down the driveway. She had nothing left to do here. Marissa was safe, Summer was looking after her. Time to go home. Alex almost laughed out loud. Home. What home? Were the motel rooms she now shared with Victoria her new home?
She shot one last glance at the apartment that once used to be her home, then she turned to walk back to the motel, her arms wrapped tightly around herself in a hopeless attempt to fight the ever lasting coldness that had crept into her heart and mind.
No, Alex thought. I'm homeless.