Disclaimer: I own nothing NADA!

I don't know how long this story is going to be. I wasn't planning on it being long but seeing where it's at it has quite a few chapters to go.

Bella's POV

"Ow! Be quiet!" The pounding on the door was sending my head haywire. I grabbed hold of my head so that it wouldn't roll off.

Who could be pounding the door? The light that came in when I opened the door blinded me. The ground beneath me was twirling.

"Oh my goodness! Bella what did you do?" Alice's cheery bell voice was too loud and aggravating.

"Can you be any louder?" I asked. I curled back on the couch and covered my head with a cushion.

"I can not believe you of all people would lose control." She laughed. The alcohol bottles were still out.

"Ever thought that maybe I'm sick and tired of always playing it safe. I'm tired of being in control and being the mature one. I had a child at twenty two. I didn't have time to party. Not that I'm complaining. I love my baby girl." I didn't want to think or rationalize. It was fun until I awoke with a massive hangover.

"I don't know how you and Rose handled all your hang over's."

"Practice." She answered. "You are going to take a shower while I prepare something for you to eat. Then you are going to be ready to spend time with your daughter." She was dragging me by my feet to the bedroom.

I was laughing like a child. Alice and I always played games like that. She was tiny but she had the strengths of body builder.

--

When I got out of the shower the house was clean and my breakfast/lunch was ready.

"I also fed Kenzo, something you forgot to do last night." Oops! I had forgotten about Kimberly's dog.

I ate peacefully as the headache went away.

"What did you and Edward talk about last night? You guys spent quite some time talking." It was pointless trying to keep it to me. Keeping it bottled in was only going to hurt more. And eventually Alice would find a way to pry it out of me.

"I let my guard down Alice. I let it slip that I might still care for him." I felt horrible for being so weak.

"Do you still care for him?" She asked warily.

"I don't know." I said quietly. "I thought that my anger would be enough to overcome what I felt but…"

"But you can't over power love." Alice finished. It was hard hearing that being said aloud.

Tears slid from my eyes and poured little puddles onto the counter.

"I can't be weak." I cried.

"You're not made of stone Bella. No matter how hard you try to be in destructive or unbeatable you still a have a tender heart. You have become stronger and more independent but your still the loving Bella that you were five years ago."

"I could never have done what you have accomplished. I admire you for your strength and capacity to overcome what gets thrown at you. You have done so much and have endured every punch that life's has thrown at you; if I was faced with something so big I wouldn't be able to get through it." Alice hadn't mentioned this to me before.

"I'm not a hero Alice. I'm afraid. I'm more than that I'm terrified." I looked at her and frowned. "I know that as much as I try to deny it my heart still skips a beat for him." I wished that wasn't true.

"I love Kimberly and she is all I have. I don't want to share her or lose her. I would die if she ever left my side." Tears spilled from me and Alice. "Edward can't take her away, right Alice?" He couldn't take her away.

Edward's POV

It was a sunny morning and compared to last night I felt better. The talk I had with Bella had taken a toll on me. It hurt each time she expressed the way she felt towards me. Anger and resentment, something Bella had not known before. What had I made her become.

As it was I couldn't forgive myself but she made me want to rip my own head off.

I was glad Esme had had a chance to see her and meet Kimberly. She really fell in love with that little girl. Who wouldn't, she was charming.

Esme wanted to talk with out anybody else hearing and suggested we walk around. I hadn't explored the neighborhood but it was all quiet.

"She still loves you Edward, but she's hurt." Esme began. "We left and we didn't bother to even consider how she would be if we never called."

"I imagined her life at ease but I see that I was wrong. She's resentful." I sighed.

"That only comes to show that she truly loved you and that the love that you both shared was so big that it couldn't be erased." Esme could be right. Last night Bella showed me that she still cared. It wasn't a direct way but I could feel it in my heart.

"Her daughter, Kimberly," She smiled. "I wish I could spend time with her. I always imagined you and Bella together with a family. Bella was like my daughter and now her daughter is like the grandchild I always wanted."

"I want to father Bella's daughter and as many more children as she wants. But she doesn't want me in her life."

"Be patient maybe she'll come around." It wasn't as simple as Esme put it. Bella had gained character and was strong enough to push people away.

We walked a few more houses down my street and turned up at another. Staring off into the sky I could make out cloud figures like Bella used to do.

"Bella." Huh? I turned towards Esme and followed her glance.

Bella was getting down from her car. She looked towards us but didn't wave. She tried to unload all the groceries she had but wasn't able to. A bag ripped spilling the apples from it.

"Here" I picked up a few apples and put them inside of another bag.

"Thanks." She said warmly. I smiled at her tone and helped her unload.

"Don't." She warned.

"Let me help you." I got another bag and placed it around my wrist.

"I can do this on my own!"

"Let us help." Esme spoke from around.

Bella's breathing became heavy and scattered. She walked to the front door and turned around. "Place them on the porch and I'll take them in." She walked inside.

Ignoring what she instructed I walked in.

"I said wait outside." She took the bags from my wrists and placed them on the counter.

"Your house is lovely Bella. It has a very warm feeling to it." Esme commented.

"Is this Kimberly?" I pointed a picture on the wall. It was a little girl maybe just a year old. The pictures were mainly about Kimberly and everyone else. The only single picture of Bella was when she was pregnant.

I picked it up and looked intently at it. She was glowing.

"Please go." She snapped the picture out of my hand and placed it faced down. Her eyes were teary and hurt. I wanted to hug her and hold her close to me. Caress her smooth face and kiss her. I wanted her lips on mine and reminisce over all the times we were together.

"Please." Her voice was muffled by her flowing tears. I nodded and risked being pushed away. I leaned in and placed a gentle kiss on her cheek. She didn't move or push me away. That pleased me.

I took Esme away from all the photographs and left Bella alone inside. I finished unloading the bags from her car and set them outside her door.