Okay so this was an old story but I reread it and hated the entire thing but I still enjoyed the concept. Because of that this is what I am changing it to, a new writing style with the same general idea and plot but more serious, kind of. Thanks for reading this and please review and tell me what you think. It is greatly appreciated.
"Is that the best that you got? I thought you were a ninja not some boy who gallivants around boasting of his skill. You are shameless, a disgrace to Konoha," a small girl shrieked. Her round, honey eyes were narrowed in contempt. She was smaller than the boy but she had the fierceness of the most seasoned veteran. Her slight frame shook in rage as she observed the boy eyeing her body. She was use to harassment being an orphan, an outsider even, no one would watch out for her. She blamed no one but her pathetic family for leaving her. She resented the village for not giving her any opportunities. But most of all she worshiped her master and idol, Orochimaru. She was too young to remember the specifics of her childhood but memories had no meaning to her. She was raised to follow orders and push all of her passions aside. She was perfect for her purpose but she had many flaws. Her disposition allowed for arrogance and making her own decisions but her overwhelming suspicion was the worst.
The boy, almost man, looked down disdainfully. He was chuunin but lacked any real aptitude to go any further in rank. He wanted to have some fun and this weak little girl posed the perfect target. He knew she was an orphan and therefore he could do what he wanted to her. "You little bitch," he backhanded her to the ground; "you will speak to me as your superior." She looked up and spit out blood. She tried to stand up until he harshly shoved her back down. He was bigger and stronger but she refused to give in. He knelt down to her and grabbed her chin smashing his lips down onto hers. The back alley he had her corned in did nothing for her situation but she still struggled against his revolting touch. Suddenly she bit down and he howled in pain. He then hoisted her up and threw her into a wall, "So you want it rough you little bitch, fine" His hands started roaming until he froze. The young girl was pinned and scared but she refused to cry and let out a sigh of relief when she saw what was behind the boy groping her.
"Get your filthy hands of her. She is not your property and her master will be incredibly displeased when he finds out of this indiscretion," he paused a moment assessing the situation further;"Tenten you should have handled this better. This is a disgrace; I thought you wanted to prove yourself? Our master was awaiting your arrival and you have kept him waiting with this distraction?" The silver-haired man glanced at Tenten with irritation. The chuunin still had Tenten pinned but was not paying attention to her. She kneed him in the stomach, ducked under his arms, and then shoved his face into the wall causing a gash to his head and unconsciousness. Kabuto nodded in acceptance and disappeared as Tenten knelt to slit her attacker's throat, following once she was finished.
"You should not have been that easily rendered helpless. You were refusing to fight back, why? You wanted this position, we gave it to you. We have supplied you with the means to be the best in this God forsaken village yet you will only fight sometimes and when it pleases you. Did you like being defiled, because if that is the case we will sell you to the brothel." Kabuto was fuming. The prized possession of his master was wasting away for no reason. She was a natural at everything with an affinity for every type of weapon. Her chakra control was exceptional along with her brilliance yet the academy instructors overlook her in favor of prominent clans. She was a gem in the rough but could never be used if she refused to show her ferociousness in all aspects. The only quality she shared with her village was her will of fire but even that was waning as she dealt with the disadvantages of anonymity. She had yet to find the advantages in it and even detested her slight frame even though it has served her well.
"It will not happen again Kabuto-sama. I have learned my lesson and will no longer hesitate to kill whomever slights me" she said her melodic drawl. She enunciated for dramatic effect and swept out of the room after a nod of acknowledgement. Tenten was irate however. She had not planned on being bested because she was not paying attention but her experience was an eye opener. She was privileged to be under the watch of Orochimaru-sama, it was not her right. She needed to be the best and prove she was a worthy investment. She was above that heathen's level that attacked her yet he had won. It would never happen again. Tenten hoped Kabuto was bluffing but she didn't want to find out and quickly headed toward the place that would hopefully occupy all of her comrades.
The room was decrepit and furnished only in storage containers and ancient things that served as tables and chairs. Shelves lined the walls filled with extensive weapons and scrolls. Four people were lounging in the large space awaiting the arrival of their fifth and final member. Tenten strolled in to the discreet glances of all present and the glaring announcement of her tardiness by the six armed boy to her left. All of the aspiring ninja were about the same age but none of them had the same mentality. These five were the favorites of their master but many more ninja were in the same position. As they were assembling themselves together the rest of the young in their compound began to congregate in the same room. After about a hundred and fifty or so had come together Kabuto enters to situate them for the arrival of their master. Orochimaru then arrives and all present bow in submission.
"Today I come to you with a proposition. As you know I have many experiments and I finally have a breakthrough you all can have access to. This gift I will bestow upon you all will cement your allegiance to me and increase your strength tenfold. Do any of you wish to no receive this?" Orochimaru exuded authority and influence over all. He had the utmost confidence in his work and also his process of weeding out the wastes. Only a few raised their hands to not receive his generous offer. Displeased, but unaffected, he nodded to Kabuto. Kabuto readily gathered and bounded these few together for his experiments. Orochimaru then turned back to the remaining ninja to give further instruction. "The rest of you I believe are ready for this final trial of mine. I know shall give each of you my seal and when you awake you will feel euphoric!"
Applause resounded around the room and one by one they each received his curse. Once all of them had received it they reassembled and waited. Within moments the first victims began to scream in pain. They clutched where their mark was and slowly succumbed to the darkness. Tenten remained awake used to extreme pain. She clutched her forearm trying to bite down her screams unlike the rest of her comrades. Orochimaru watched her in fascination. She was so much like Anko, but infinitely better. Slowly the pain began to increase until it was unbearable and Tenten finally found release letting out a blood curdling scream that Orochimaru delighted in. He loved the sound of her pain, relished in it. He knew she would survive, how many others he had no inkling. It was of no consequence to him for he was above it all. As Tenten finally fell to the floor she could hear shrill screams from Kabuto's laboratory that were louder than even her own.
Tenten awakes eventually to a fire in her body incomparable to anything she had ever before experienced. She tried to rise on unstable feet but crumpled to the floor once again clutching her forearm. Her chocolate locks fell in wisps in front of her eyes as her forehead perspired in effort. She would make it she decided but she was not sure about anyone else. She did not particularly care for anyone else but was curious nonetheless. She raises her head and jerks back in astonishment when she finds her answer sprawled out all around her, dead.