A/N I wanna be a Halestorm groupie and be BFF's with Spashley…but I don't know them or own any of their hotness.
Okay, so I'm kind of coming down off my Halestorm high and this chapter took a little bit more work write. But I know there are a few people (literally lol) out there who have reviewed or marked it as worth their time so I sat down tonight and tapped out another chapter. Hope I didn't disappoint.
CHAPTER SIX
Ashley was curled on the sofa in her dressing room, a pillow clutched to her chest. Brown eyes were sad and unfocused; the rock star was just letting the seconds tick away. A light tapping on the door barely registered in her memory muddled mind, she ignored it.
Tomorrow night was the last night of the tour; Ashley was supposed to go home, to an empty beach house in L.A. It was almost Christmas, the band and her crew were excited. Hell even her manager had managed to empty her schedule of radio and TV interviews, the rock star was set to have six weeks of glorious freedom.
She should be sharing it with family and friends. Well what little family she had, her half sister Kyla would spend New Years with Ashley for her annual Eve Extravaganza. But Kyla would spend Christmas in Boston with her mom and the rock star would be alone.
Ashley tried to redirect her subconscious; she didn't want to think about the upcoming month or what she would do. She attempted to block all thoughts of wanting to spend the holidays with a certain blonde or the fact that she had so few people on her gift list. Oh sure, she had the band, crew, and the standard schmoozing gifts that her assistant would purchase and send. But when it came right down to it, the rock star had so few people in her life that weren't 'in the business.'
She had lost everything when she lost Spencer. The Midwestern girl had a large extended family. Granted the beginning of their relationship when been a bit of a struggle against small town ideals, eventually the smooth talking brunette had won over her girlfriend's relatives. Holidays with the Carlin's meant delicious home cooked meals made by Spencer's dad and listening to the ridiculously fake egotistical exploits of her brother Glen. Smiling and saying you like ugly Christmas sweaters from grandma and of course holding hands with her mother during prayers. Ashley's palms grew sweaty at the memory. She still feared that the woman could somehow read her mind through touch and would strangle the brunette if she knew all the things the rockers hands had done to her daughter.
It was the only time in Ashley's life that she had felt apart of a family. But none of it meant anything without the blonde. Standing under the mistletoe and giggling like teenagers while exchanging a kiss and trying not to get caught. Hugs and tears with the family before leaving to spend their own Christmas curled up next to a fire or a midnight swim and laying out on the beach watching the sunset. The brunette squeezed the pillow tighter as she imagined holding her lover.
Her train of thought was interrupted by tapping again, this time brown eyes turned to stare at the door handle, wondering if the idiot on the other side was brazen enough to enter without permission. Laying her head back against the pillows, Ashley's thoughts wondered back to the last time she had cuddled with Spencer back stage after a show. The rock star was the happiest that she had ever been, she had everything she ever wanted wrapped in her arms. Until some idiot knocked on the door.
……………flashback……….two years ago……….
Legs and arms were wrapped around each other as the two girls lay on the couch in Ashley's dressing room; both were drifting in and out of sleep. It was late and they were both tired, but they cherished each others presence, feeling content in their love.
Ashley had proposed, one year exactly from the date that everything nearly collapsed around her, the night that Spencer gave her a third chance at love. They were two months from the wedding and had been spending more and more time apart as the rocker continued to tour and Spencer made wedding plans and settled into their new beach front home.
Ashley had to get on the bus soon, but Spencer was headed home to continue with wedding plans and was going to try and catch up with the songstress in a week. After the incident a year ago, the sexy brunette vowed to never be apart from her lover for more than a week. She never wanted to be tempted to think with her libido again and up until about two months ago that plan had worked perfectly. But as the wedding got closer their days apart had gotten longer and longer. The girls hadn't been together in almost three weeks and Ashley was thrilled to be wrapped up in her lover again.
The rock star was happy and basking in the feel of the woman in her arms, storing it away for her next few lonely nights alone, when her euphoria was interrupted by a knock at the door. She slid out from under the half asleep blonde and stumbled sleepily to the door. Pulling it open she was taken by surprise when a good looking dark haired guy leaned down placed a quick kiss on her lips.
Stumbling back a little to regain her composure she tried to comprehend what was going on, "Aiden, what are you doing here?"
"I missed you."
Ashley was still confused, "What?"
Aiden smiled and held up a large bouquet of flowers, "I brought these for you." He brushed a curl back from her face, "I haven't stopped thinking about how hot we were together two nights ago."
Mocha eyes searched his face for some kind explanation that seemed rational, she took the flowers from his hand and turned to toss them on the vanity when she noticed angry blue eyes watching her every move.
Spencer thought she had everything in life she could ever want…five seconds ago. In the span of a few seconds she went from her and Ashley being back on track and stronger than ever, to her jealousy and distrust raging back to the surface. Right now, in this moment she could feel her world crumbling and it felt like the bitter pill she knew she may some day have to swallow.
"Spence this isn't what it looks like." Ashley took a step towards the blonde hoping to diffuse a potentially explosive situation.
"Really Ash, because it looks like you and your boyfriend got your nights confused."
Ashley stopped in her tracks, disappointed that the blonde still didn't trust her, pissed at herself for creating that distrust and a little angry that she didn't know her fiancé was still holding her mistakes against her.
"Who are you?" Both girls turned towards Aiden and burned daggers through him their glares.
Ashley reluctantly turned to face him so that she could make herself very clear, "My fiancé, the girl I'm going to marry, so whatever you thought…."
"Did you sleep with him?"
Ashley whipped around her mouth agape; she looked at her lover like she'd never seen her before. The rock star could feel her ears burn and her stomach started churning.
Before Ashley could speak, Aiden put the first nail in her coffin, "Oh yeah."
Spencer was moving before Ashley could reach her; the blonde was storming around the room grabbing her shoes, jacket and purse. Every time the rock star got close to her she quickly put space between them.
Ashley fought against the burning in her chest that felt like it was sucking the life out of her and forced her mind to speak the words in her panicked mind, "In high school! Spencer look at me, we slept together in high school, not recently! Spencer please stop!" Ashley could hear her voice breaking; feel the fear clenching her insides.
She turned to Aiden her voice finding strength with desperation, "Tell her! Tell her it was in high school!"
Aiden was a little taken aback by the scene progressing in front of him and the fear in Ashley's voice. That wasn't the girl he remembered, he wanted the feisty brunette back that he had dreamed about over the past decade. He decided to tell the truth but leave it open to interpretation turning to the blonde he started with a smirk, "The first time we slept together was back in school, but two nights ago, way hotter."
He finished with a wink at Ashley and she felt the second nail driven through her heart, "You son of a bitch, nothing happened!"
Brown eyes pleaded with her fiancé to believe her, "Two nights ago I recognized him in the crowd, I pulled him up on stage and kissed him, then I sat him in a chair and finished the song on his lap." The rocker felt like she was suffocating, dizziness plagued her vision and she wanted to sit down, but she had to make the blonde believe her, "That's it nothing else happened. Spencer I swear that's it." She waited, this was it, she could feel it, her lover would either trust her or walk away.
"She gave me the best lap dance I've ever had," Aiden turned to the crumbling brunette and with a cocky nod he indicated himself, "you wanted this, still do."
Ashley watched Spencer back towards the door and spoke calmly to her lover.
I know what you must be thinking
Spencer took another step, she couldn't tell the truth from the gossip magazines anymore. She couldn't keep waiting for the next time that Ashley would be unfaithful; she couldn't keep waiting for her lover to give herself to someone else. Spencer's heart was breaking because even if she didn't believe her reason for leaving, she never wanted to live through knowing it actually happened. Ashley spoke again, grasping for the right words to save herself.
But you're not right
The blue eyes that had refused to meet her own finally looked up. Ashley staggered back into the couch and swallowed thickly, there was nothing familiar in those cobalt eyes. It was like she had been completed erased, any love that was normally expressed in her lovers eyes had been blasted into oblivion. The rock star didn't even have the energy to fight for breathe as she watched her fiancé slide off her engagement ring and sit it next to the flowers. The lid on Ashley's coffin had been sealed.
Spencer disappeared out the door and Ashley sank to her knees. Aiden was immediately at her side with his hand on her shoulder, "Hey, babe it's all good, everything's gonna be fine."
Tear filled eyes looked up at Aiden in shock and disbelief. She screamed at him.
You should know I'm not your baby
Not tonight
I never was
Those were the last words Spencer heard before she hit the exit and ran towards her car. It didn't matter, it was all too much, she couldn't live like this anymore, always wondering if she was enough for the sexy rock star. If her love was enough to keep her loyal, if her simple Midwestern ways made her happy, if she was skilled enough to please her. She couldn't do this anymore; she refused to let herself be set up for heart break.
Aiden and Ashley were in a bit of a staring match. Brown eyes glared at him wishing she could blink him out of existence. How did she let this happen, she wasn't this person. Ashley shook her head and stood. A few short years ago she would have laughed this off and spent the night with one or the both of them. She didn't get close to people didn't allow people's feelings to impact her. She never gave her heart to anyone. She was not that kind of girl. She mumbled to herself.
The kind of girl to trip and fall in love
I never was
Ashley kept going, starting a slow circle around the dressing room. Absentmindedly touching random objects throughout the room, she continued to ramble to herself.
The kind to say enough is not enough
I never was
The touchy feely, co-dependent kind
Finally Aiden spoke, "Ash, are you okay? I mean obviously you're upset but I thought we had a good thing, two days ago, high school; we've definitely got a connection. I mean I read the tabloids I know you've done the whole lesbian thing for a while but you should give this a chance."
Ashley paused her pacing and looked up at him like he had grown two heads. She spoke honestly.
I like the feeling but I'm not on cloud nine
Aiden's arrogance returned, reading potential in her little admission, he closed the distance between the two of them, but Ashley stopped him with a hand to his chest. She wasn't really looking at him just incoherently speaking words as she shook her head again.
Ya love it ya hate it
Ya think it ya say it
Ya want it ya need it
Aiden leaned down and tried to kiss her but she jerked her head back and glared at him.
I tell ya but you don't believe it
The rock princess surprised him when she shoved him hard with both hands; he fell backwards onto the couch. Ashley's shock and disorientation at experiencing her whole world fall apart suddenly focused on the person responsible for starting that disaster.
What were you expecting?
Another lullaby?
Are you kidding?
You must be high
She was screaming now allowing her rage to bubble to the surface.
You must be high
'Cause it was just one kiss
Hey, Hey, Hey
Ashley's emotions started to muddle her mind and she realized she was stuttering. Unable to find words to continue to describe how moronic this man was she turned away, but Aiden tried to pull her down on the couch with him. The rocker snatched her arm away and stormed over to the discarded flowers.
I don't need your flowers they'll just go to waste
She threw them in the garbage, then she picked up the box of candy she hadn't even realized was there.
I don't want your candy cause I don't like the taste
This time she threw them at him, but he dodged the bullet and got to his feet. For a second Ashley thought she had gone too far, he was a good eight inches taller than her and she wasn't exactly sure she wanted to piss him off. Turning her back on him she paced up to the vanity to stare at her own reflection while she continued to rant.
There never was
A possibility I'd stick around
It never was
My intention just to let you down
I never was
The kind of girl that's good at playin' house
At this point she wasn't even sure if she was talking to Aiden anymore or if she was trying to convince herself that this was the truth about her relationship. Aiden walked up behind her and placed a hand on her shoulder, he met her eyes in the mirror, "Give us a chance I think we can make this work."
She met his reflection in the mirror with a disbelieving look.
Ya want it ya need it
I tell ya but you don't believe it
"Ash, we were good together, I know we can be good together again." He stepped in closer and started to wrap his arms around her waist but she shoved him off and turned to glare at him. He apparently had a very thick skull and she needed to repeat herself in order for him to get the picture.
What were you expecting?
Another lullaby?
Are you kidding?
You must be high
You must be high
'Cause it was just one kiss
Aiden was starting to get desperate, maybe he had read everything wrong, maybe it was all an act, a show for her thousands of fans, but it had felt so real to him. He needed to do something; he wanted her back and felt like he was losing his only chance, "Marry me!"
Ashley's mouth dropped open and she blinked her eyes a few times just to see if this was all a bad dream, she could wake up from, accepting that she was in reality she spit out her response.
Everything about you makes me scream
Aiden got down on one knee and pulled his high school ring from his finger, holding it up to Ashley he tried again, "Please, Ashley, give us another chance, agree to be my wife."
Ashley needed him gone, she needed to be alone.
Be a man and get up off your knees
I'm trying to say this in the nicest way.
…………….end …flashback…………
Ashley heard tapping again and was brought back to the moment. The tired and emotional rock star finally dragged herself off the couch and started for the door.
The song from that night was released eight months after Spencer had walked out of her life. The rock princess had demanded that it be an unplanned addition to the album they were almost finished recording and released as the first single.
As Ashley reached for the door handle she had no idea she was about to come face to face with her past
She didn't know that song was the reason the blonde had gone to the concert in June. Much like the first time she let Ashley back in her life, Spencer went to the concert seeking answers. She wanted to know if the song was about Aiden and the truth about what happened.
On the other side of the door Spencer recalled those same events that brought her to where she was. She believed her former lover when she swore to her that nothing happened with Aiden. Spencer stayed that night last summer with Ashley on her tour bus, but in the morning she had regretted her rash decision. She was grateful to have the truth, but she thought that night had been a mistake; too soon, she needed time to think.
She knocked on the door again and heard cussing from the other side. Her breath caught in her throat. It had been six months since she had last scene the gorgeous brunette and Spencer had come to realize that the only mistake she made was walking away from Ashley Davies twice in the same lifetime.