Disclaimer: The Wonderful World of Harry Potter belongs to J.K. Rowling. I own nothing but the plot and Lily Evans' literary voice and attitude. I don't own Whiskas ™.

A Look At Wonderland

by Wired Dragonfli

Chapter Four – I Don't Enjoy Smelling Like Whiskas

History of Magic

October 5, 11:32 AM

I know…

I am the most horrible person ever…

I deserve to be cooked in frog spawn and served to trolls.

What can I say? Its OWLs year, I'm a prefect, and I lost complete interest in writing in this shortly after I arrived at Hogwarts…but let's not dwell on the past.

They've decided to turn the Halloween feast into a masqurade ball, 4th years and up. This is like those trashy romance novels where the girl meets boy at masqurade ball, they fall in love, and don't want the night to end, lest they never see each other again. Alas, the end of the night comes and they unmask each other to find that the person before them is their best friend/worst enemy/crush/best friend's boy friend/friend's brother/etc.

Then they ravish each other in a small cramped closet or bathroom and live happily ever after.

Only this won't happen to me as I don't have any of the above except for a crush…and the fact that I am me and my chances at love are completely abysmal. No, it's alright, you don't have to feel sorry for me. I am content with the life of a spinster-ish martyr. Then again…I'm not so sure about keeping millions of cats and smelling like Whiskas ™.

We (me and Em and Marls…I mean Emmeline and Marlene and I) stayed up last night in the girl's loos till 3 in the morning (though how is this morning also last night?) playing dominoes. We played the tedious kind where the first person to hit 101 loses, except we changed it to 10,000. The closest any of us got was me (I kept drawing from the pile when I already had the one I needed) with 5,369. Em managed a zero all through the first thousand.

Ha, I haven't written in weeks and when I do, you get a play by play on a domino game…that was the longest time I have spent in the bathroom…even. To add to our fun, the loser of various rounds had to get into the tub and crow like a rooster.

My God! What is it with people reading over my shoulder? In the past five minutes I have been told:

I spelled masqurade…masquraid—oh fuck it—wrong (Remus)

I write messily whan attempting to copy History notes at the same time, and to solve the problem I should stop multi-tasking (Marlene)

And…

"So that was you crowing at one?" (James)

…

I can't believe we're still learning about goblin rebellions…what is this…the fourth year we've gone over this? At this point I just top my notes with "Goblin Rebellion" and I'm fine…of course…I will be screwed when I attempt to convince them (the OWL people) that the great riot of what's-his-name's-puffskein was actual a goblin rebellion. That is all I will ever learn and remember in this class…that learned about four years worth of goblin rebellions.

…

Em just commented that I make a lot of useless lists. That's it! I'm done for the day.

Girl's Dorms

October 29, 8:17 PM

A Hogsmeade weekend is coming up, which is the perfect time to purchase costumes for the masque ball. I should look into taking French. That language has been overused and slaughtered by me. It deserves to have time devoted…to itself…by me.

I need to shave.

Also, I've developed a rats nest at the base of my neck which I've been gathering into a ponytail and disguising as sleek, healthy hair. I need to detanglefy it.

Em wanted us to go as fairies, Marlene wants to be a gothic ballerina (another one of her flights of fancy) and I…don't know what I want to be. Maybe something elegant but daring? A steel blue dress with hot pink add-ons? I'd be better off trying to charm a napkin into a dress (and have it disappear half way through the masquerade..I can spell it now!) then attempting to find a dress that suits me.

Yeah, I know, too many parenthesis up there, and your mind is boggled from trying to figure that out. To bad, life's a bitch, you get over it.

Ooh…maybe I'll change my hair into a purple afro…dreadlocks? Mullet? Mohawk?

Em is in the corner crafting herself some fairy wings. She's enchanted them to change color subtly and to shimmer prettily but that's as far as Em stays interested in Charms. Em can prettify and unique-ize things (is unique a French word? I bet it came from one…it sounds French.), but as far as making things flutter and fly…

Marlene already has a dress picked out. She's working on ruffling it and giving the silky material the consistency of crushed velvet. Her shoes are black, lace up ballet shoes…"point" shoes she called them. Right now she's transfiguring the top part of her dress to become a corset…as if her boobs aren't big enough already. That girl sure likes pain, wanting to wear a corset for no reason.

Me? I'm brewing a potion to change the color of my hair. Marlene is keeping an eye open for any mistakes I make. That girl as talented at multi-tasking.

October 29, 8:47 PM

I couldn't pick out a color, so I'm making Marls dark maroon hair dye to streak her hair with.

"Marls, what do I need to add to the potion for burgundy dye?" I ask.

"My dress will have dark turquoise lining so add two teaspoons of powdered nightshade and after five minutes, add two drops of the clear liquid you found necessary not to label." She replied without looking up.

"How do you know I'm making this for you?"

"Burgundy clashes with your hair, and we both know that Emmy is going to go glitter crazy on her hair and hates dark red." She said, still focused on her dress.

I did as she told me, still in awe of her ability to pronounce all of her response without choking on her tongue.

I wouldn't even be asking her for help right now if it weren't for the fact that I was horrible at potions that needed an outcome of varying colors and flavors. I could never remember what ingredient went with which color or scent.

Emmy threw down the wings in frustration and walked over to her jewelry box(bloody hell, it's more like a treasure chest) and started rummaging through it. I added the last two drops of fluid and capped the cauldron and placed it on a shelf next to three fresh, unwrapped copied of Hogwarts: A History.(none of us wants to brave the book yet.)

Marlene is now adding pretty blue material as her lining. She's getting much more done that Em and me put together. The Hogsmead trip is tomorrow, and the Masquerade on Sunday, the day following tomorrow. Marlene was planning on helping Sirius choose his clothes so they could match.

I took up Em's wings and tried to make them flutter. Emmy uttered a "thank you" as well as a promise to help me pick out my dress and do my hair and makeup.

Five minutes went by in silence before Emmeline exclaimed that she had found something and presented Marlene with earrings and a necklace that matched the pretty blue lining of Marlene's dress beautifully. Marls smiled happily and hugged Emmy. Emmy hugged back before continuing to look through her stuff.

Eventually, I got the spell right and got the wings to flutter softly. But now they won't stop and it's bugging everyone.

Marlene finished her dress fifteen minutes prior to this…it's gorgeous…(and I wonder why she wasn't put in Slytherin(which the hat wanted to put her in(can I use to many parentheses?)) as she stole the dress from her cousin, and manipulated Camille(a 6th year ballerina) into letting her borrow ballet slippers(definite signs of slyness and cunning)) and everything matches perfectly.

Another five minutes after the wings first fluttered Emmy had found us all matching sets of jewelry. Mine are green as Emming wants my dress to be as green as my eyes. She is now making us masks. Marling went to shower and I am slipping on my PJ's and going to bed.

"I'm going to start calling you Marling and Emming and you can call me Liling." I said as Marls came out of the bathroom. The towel she was using to dry was snapped at me and I shut up.

October 30, 12:04

But I'm still gonna call them Marling and Emming.

October 30, 12:07

And they have to call me Liling…

October 30, 12:37

"I can't fall asleep…"

"Lily, shut up…"

"But you're supposed to call me Liling…" Pout, pout.

"Fine! Liling?"

"Yes?"

"Shut up!"

"But the wings…" whine, whine.

"No…hush!"

October 30, 1:12

God's knickers! Those wings are annoying!

Girl's Dorms

October 31, 5:01 PM

Em is a genius. She was right about the green dress.

"Em, you're a genius. You were right about the green dress…" What can I say? I'm out of original thoughts and synonyms.

"Of course I am…" said the genius, who was now cutting inches off of her dress's hem. Well, actually, it was a sort of upside down triangle for the bodice, except an obtuse triangle, and there were deep slits on the sides, and the rest of the skirt was pretty much a bunch of gauzy strips.

My dress is all Eqyptian like. It is a light green that goes with my eyes, and all the edges have an inch thick golden border. And the v-neck goes down to my belt, with beaded strings holding it together. The belt reminds me of those wrestling prize belts, it's huge, but pretty. It is folded over itself at the bottom, and ends up having a slit down the middle. The sleeves are very long, but they're off the shoulder, held up by more golden beads.

Em almost made me get a dress that was modeled after a peacock. It was pretty, but much too wild for me. Peacocks are peculiar creatures. The males are smaller and prettier than the females…well…I guess it's supposed to be make up for their "peacocks"

Marlene, who is enchanting my dress to a darker shade (it was light, yellowy-green) tells me that James is rubbing off on me…and I think she might be right as I completely took that statement with a v., v. wrong mindset. Marling is finished with my dress and is taking down the hair coloring potion.

"Ooh! Wait! I'll do it!" I exclaim, as it was my potion…is my potion. This, many things happened at once. I jumped up and snatched my cauldron from the table where Marls left it. Marlene slipped into her dress, and Emmy pushed Marlene into a chair and started applying make-up.

I gave a laugh of excitement (some people shriek, some people piss their pants, but no, Lily Evans has to laugh like a moronic maniac when she's excited.). I put my wand tip into the potion and drew up some blue dye, then going over to Marlene, I brutally pulled her hair-tie out and started streaking her hair in a manner that seemed very professional to me.

Once that was done, I curled the ends of her hair, framed her face with thick bangs that revealed just enough of her face and screamed "GOTHIC!" I tied some back with ribbons that matched her shoes

"Em, you've dribbled the mascara too much…I look like one of those posers!" Marlene said exasperatedly, eyeing the expertly smudged mascara on her cheeks, "next thing I know, you'll be drawing slit marks on my wrists."

"Oh hush you," Emmy said, silencingly. I took this opportunity to use lip liner and draw the aforementioned slits on her wrists.

"Lily!" Marlene hissed. Em sent a glare her way and went back to work. I stuck out my tongue but Marling didn't see as she was too busy rubbing off the fake wounds on her forearms.

Emmeline Vance is passionate about beautifying. She knows fashion, and she knows hair and make-up. It is her forte (again…me and my pseudo-French). She knows she knows it, too. Right now I'm sure she's amused by Marlene's frustration, because in the end, she'll be right, and Marlene will look hot, unique, and genuine. Though I'm sure one of those contradicts another.

Done with Marlene's hair, I put on my dress and heels (once white, now charmed emerald green) I was doubtful about the v-neck of the dress. It was much too violently exposing, and I wasn't sure that the beads would hold it together. Being a bit stupid, I started trying to rip the two sides apart, but they would not come apart. Very relieved by this, I turned to Marls, sure that she was behind the super enforced beads.

"In case some pervert starts too get too friendly," she said, with a wink and a smile.

I also had a golden eye mask thing. It was the same gold as the borders on my dress, with emerald rhinestones on it. I was admiring the faint Egyptian runes on it when I found myself pulled backward and into the Chair of Doom! Both girls assaulted me with all kinds of beauty products, and charms and what not.

I was surprised Em's make-up didn't melt; she was working so hard. Not that I'm so ugly I need to be worked on so much. Then again(no, I am not going on about the subject of my ugliness, not that I'm ugly), Em had gone for and airy fairy look.(Eew…it rhymes. I've been rhyming things to much, and am annoying myself at this point.) Her blonde hair was completely curled, all she needed to do was dress.

October 31, 6:08 PM

My hair has a green streak in it, my hair is wavy, and silky and soft…and has those kiddy fringes all the Egyptian queens were wild about…and…I'm late. Yay!

Emmy's dress was too short, so we charmed it so adults wouldn't notice. Marlene forgot she was wearing a mask and was about to ruin the mascara stained cheeks, but we pit the eye thingies on a stick and now she just incorporates it into her costume by swishing it lavishly as she "ballets" down the hall.

Emmeline makes a perfect fairy, and the wings look awesome, with their shimmery color-changedness. Her dress is a classic sleeveless bodice in light pink. She is wearing light pink fishnets, and her skirt strips are variations of pink and orange. She is going barefoot. Not surprise. Her mask it really pretty, it is all transparent and yeah, a pink and orange gradient, pink in the center, orange on the edges.

Have to go now, arevois. (yes I know…FRENCH!)

Entrance Hall

October 31, 6:23 PM

Marlie and Sirie are over…

I would be sad if I weren't so terribly happy. Once again, I'm horrible…need I make another frogspawn and troll reference? But see, Marlene isn't so sad about it…at least she's not acting it…if she were crying, I wouldn't be able to tell…because of the raccoon eyes…and I mean that in the nicest way…the raccoon eyes comment…yeah.

It started the moment we got to the dance. Well, it was in the entrance hall right before the dance. The Marauders decided to go as stoners, James and Sirius were barely pulling it off, and I only say they were because well, I know them, and can't be rude lest they read over my shoulder one day when I'm bored and going through old entries in this journal.

Peter, god…Peter was a train wreck, and what a train wreck, packing 500kg…and gaining weight as he walked. Honestly, he inhales fatty food like a train does coal. Sirius approached Marlene wearing no shirt but an Indian vest thing, tie-dye glasses that spun and made me dizzy, and a peace medal on his forehead. He was wearing pants that were waay too baggy and cut off mid-shin to make way for stockings with pink horses on them.And the shoes?

Platforms, what else?

James had come with bug-eye glasses, a hat he must have stolen from the mad hatter, and a huge rainbow shirt, and a kilt(!), and fishnets, and platform shoes as well.

Remus was much more toned down, wearing dark colors and looking genuinely misplaced in all aspects except the bags under is eyes. He looked almost rockstar-ish. Peter was wearing what looked like a huge tie-dye dress. I won't go into detail.

He had a clown afro! Okay…shutting up now.

Marlene. Was. Furius. Ick, that's a play on words there, and it sorta ruined the sentence, let me try again.

Marlene. Was. Furious.

Sirius was not wearing what she picked out for him…and he greeted her in a way that obviously made her blood boil.

"Marlene, chill man…"

She quirked and eyebrow and started walking right at him, only to bump into him violently and walk to some Ravenclaw dressed as the phantom of the opera.

She did it in a classy way, and started flirting with him in a strangely dignified manner. I could barely flirt, much less make it look dignifies. Go Marlene!

Sirius's swirly spectacles could not hid the look in his eyes: "What'd I do?"

Emmy leaned into me and whispered "Diggory looks pretty lonely, I'm going to keep him company, okay?"

I grinned at her and watched her go off. Once I was along, James seemed to make a bee-line for me. I instead grabbed a chair between a bored Remus, and a sulking Sirius. James pretended to have been heading off for some blonde girl. I pretended not to care.

Do you know what's sad? This all happened before the dance, in one minute. You know what's sadder? I was late and I still didn't really miss anything. You know what's the saddest? I shrunk this book, stuck it behind my belt, and brought it with me incase I got bored…What is wrong with me? Oh my god…I just saw my reflection in some girls compact…is that blonde hair?

Prefect's Bathroom

October 31, 9:51 PM

Turns out, the teachers were casting a charm on the room so that no one would recognize anyone of the opposite sex for the night. They kept forgetting who they were and what they were doing there so alas, it took so long.

All I know is that, thanks to my trusty book, I knew exactly who most people were…I made a list of them on the back page while waiting for the doors to open. Marlene and Sirius, however, weren't as lucky (I wrote licky…) and couldn't get back together all night, and by the time they somehow found each other, they were so jealous they just stomped away.

Em has ditched Diggory and is now standing with Marlene and me. After filling them in on who the Marauders were, we were all glaring at them. They were coaching Sirius and trying to get him over Marls or something, but they kept shooting looks at us. Finally fed up, I grabbed my first drink from the punch bowl and headed towards the doors.

My two groupies, ha, followed me, quizzical looks in their eyes.

"I'm going for a swim in the prefects bathroom, you can come too," I said, as we passed by the Marauders. I heard a snippet of their conversation.

"Sirius, don't drink that—"

"I'll drink what I want, Peter!"

"But I spiked it with fire whiskey…"

"You did what?"

"James, quiet…"

"Moony, sod off. Now Peter, generally, when one spikes the punch, one tells his friends before they all take drinks out of it."

"Bloody idiot."

And then we left, out the door, and everything became clear again.

"Looks like the idiots are having a fight," Marlene snorted. She was pissed, but she was not depressed. Since she wasn't pissed at us, we wouldn't be getting any tongue lashing, so we were all fine, more or less.

A few hundred feet, and lots of avoiding chaperones later, we were at the prefects' bathroom.

"Chicken nugget," I muttered, and the door opened. Once our trio had disappeared inside, we closed the door and promptly forgot to lock it.

Marls retreated to the taps and turned on chocolate bubbles, vanilla flavored water, mixed with a bunch of lavender stuff. She gave a groan as she slipped off the painful "point" shoes, and dipped her feet into the water.

Once the water was full, Emmy dove in, and I water-repelled my dress and jumped in as well. Within moments, we were having a water fight, and Marlene was looking down at us scornfully.

Everything seemed normal until the three idiots walked in, sans Peter. I think sans means without.

"Oh crap…" said James.

"What, Jamesie? Not happy to see me?" said a flat voice belonging to me.

"No…I err," and we never found out what he meant because at that moment, Sirius chucked his glasses onto the floor and stomped on them repeatedly.

"That's not going to make me take you back," Marls said icily, and Emmy started laughing so much she choked on the water. I'm surprised it wasn't me, as I usually fulfill the role of choking on things.

I tried to save the drowning Emmy as Sirius approached.

"You know what Marlene—" and we never found that out either as Marling threw her darling into the sparkling….water. Okay, I admit it…I like to rhyme.

Then, they started this stupid sissy water fight where both of them had they're eyes closed and were splashing in the wrong direction. Marls with her feet and Sirius with his powerful quiddy-toned arms.

I waddled over to where James was sitting, his feet dangling in the pool. I submerged and grabbed one foot and pulled. However, the platform shoe came off. I grabbed at the other foot and that shoe came off. By then, I had given up holding my breath and surfaced.

"What are you doing?" he asked calmly.

"Stealing your shoes…" I said so seriously that it was funny. It was the truth but it was said so absurdly that we both started laughing. I climbed out and sat next to him, pulling off my heels and handing them to him. "Knock yourself out…"

The platforms were heavy and waterlogged. After tipping them over and pouring the water out, I slipped them on and wiggled my feet. I got up and tested them out, walking over to where Remus was arguing with Sirius, trying to hold him back from pulling Marls into the water.

"Sirius, it's your own fault for acting like an arse, stop trying to drag Marlene into the water!" Remus said, keeping a mad(crazy) Sirius back from the gothic ballerina, and this was in the water, where both of them kept slipping.

I tried to recall when Remus got into the water and shrugged. There were yelling so loudly the whole castle should be awake by now.

"Shit!" I muttered loudly, before running in the platforms for the door. At the last moment, I slipped and fell against the door, but accomplished locking it. However, I was stuck in that position and the platforms were slipping.

James ambled over in my heels, and somehow helped me up. How the hell was he not falling all over himself in those heels?

"How the hell are you not falling all over yourself in those heels?" I asked, once again, being unoriginal.

"Well," my crush said, stroking his chin, "I've been wearing platforms all night, so you see, I'm used to them."

In the background, there was a loud splash, a muffled yell of "wanker" as Marlene was finally pulled into the water.

Must I mention that both Sirius, Marlene, and Em consumed an abnormal amount of punch and cumulatively, a heck of a lot of fire whiskey.

James pulled off my shoes and sat down, leaning against the wall. I sat down next to him again, and knocked the heels of the platforms together.

"Do you have the time?" I asked sleepily, it must have been fairly late…

"It's about…one in the morning," James said, squinting.

"So we're stuck in here until morning," I said quietly.

"Hey guys! If you want to stop fighting for a second?" James yelled. I looked at his gorgeous brown eyes and got lost.

Meanwhile, the other four stopped fighting and looked in our direction. Emmy let out a really lowed giggle and started singing under her breath. It sounded suspiciously like the muggle rhyme…

"James and Lily, sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G…" and then she drifted off, leaning against Marlene and laughing herself sick.

James quirked an eyebrow and continued, I looked away from him and blushed. "We're going to be locked in here till morning, because the masquerade probably ended by now, and teachers are out patrolling the halls. Obviously, if you want to get us all caught, go on with your fight."

They all seemed to get the message and shut up for the most part. Remus went to sleep in a corner, Emmy continued swimming, and Sirius and Marlene were bickering under their breath, still in the pool.

After a while, everything went black and I entered dreamworld.

Dorms

November 1, 5:32 AM

I woke up nestled against something very warm and cuddly. I didn't want to get up at all. The floor was wet, and someone was nudging my foot.

Then, cold water was dumped on me and I jolted up, away from my comfy…something and gasped in shock.

"Lils, you realize it is Monday, and we have class today?" Emmy asked in a panicked voice.

"What?" I questioned sharply.

"Yeah, so stop snuggling James and get up. It would help if you opened your eyes." Came Marlene's voice of reason.

"Ah, I see the whiskey wore off…" I retorted, but I got up and opened my eyes. Sirius, Remus, Emmeline, and Marls were standing before me. James was only just sitting up. James had been my pillow.

I blushed a very bright red, and grabbed my heels and walked off with no word to anyone, I opened the door, and looked out.

"No one out there," I mumbled, then waved for Marling and Emming to follow me, not even daring to look back.

A/N: Okay…sadly, we're not allowed reviewer responses, and I'm lazy, so I shall thank thee and stuff.

I had major writers block, as you can tell since my last update was back in…april. Ha…sorry about that.

I drew Lily's dress, since it was confusing, and well, if you want to see it, a link will be up on my profile today or tomorrow.

Please review! begs

Thanks to: crazy turtle, Vanessa-Black and Zabini, tweeny-weeny, and Mrs. Glucoseman.