Made by me~ jamie cupcake(review please)

disclaimer: i do not own naruto. but i do own the plot.

chapter 1: Lost in the light and dark.

"How could this have happened…?" Iruka contemplated to himself as distressed piano music echoed the corridors of the church about him.

He clenched his fist tightened it so that his knuckles turned ghostly white, his shoulders shuttered and trembled non-stop. His nerves were frayed and grated. He was the only one there to mourn for the death of his beloved jounin. The silence was causing him to tremble as anguish and grief over took his well developed body stillness finally over took him as his shaky breath slowly escaped his mouth.

As much a Konoha loved Kakashi none could bare to see him in his current state. He was missing his leg from his knee down as blood drenched his uniform; bruises coated his once flawless pale skin. Iruka's eyes slowly glazed kakashi's pale porcelain skin his beauty was there even in death.

No one came to visit the great sharigani no Kakashi.

He was in an old stone church at the front, near the alter, where his maple coffin glowed as sorrowful light glinted off its clear surface.

Amber eyes slowly started to drip as tears gradually were released from Iruka's eyes. The droplets gently sloped over his well defined tanned cheek as he replayed his memories with Kakashi.

Standing next to him he took in the scenery he might have been able to enjoy himself today but it was near impossible as he stared at the scarred and bruised pile of bones wear laid in the box before him.

The piano suddenly stopped as it was interrupted by a clock as it struck 12. Iruka stepped closer to the casket twisting over he leaned over.

"good bye my love" he whispered breathily as his lips brushed the covered lips while he lace his hands into the jounin's silvery locks and kissed his lover for the last time.

He took one last final look at his brutally torched body as he fastened the casket. Without further words he slipped out into the warm sunny grass which was wild so it stopped at his hip and he swayed with the wind. Blue jays twirled and sung songs of sorrow as the dipped into the meadow. At 3 they would move his body to bury it next to his fathers and his name would be engraved next to obito at memorial rock. Iruka wouldn't be there, he just couldn't. As much as he loved him he would surly faint and be a burden to whoever was there.

Looking up at the sky, a grimace was pressed on his face as a tear rolled down his scarred cheek. He knew from today on this would be his last cry.

Even thought the sun warmed his skin it didn't go any deeper his heart stayed shielded with cold layer of stone. But on the inside it was just a pile of bleeding tissues. This scar was not going to go away. It would be something he would carry the rest of his life.

"Kakashi…?"

"Yes, Iruka" the jounin sat down on the roof of his apartment facing the sun set. The sight of the sun fading was simply breath taking, particularly because he was with Iruka. His dear cherished Iruka.

In a below whisper, murmured "what is love to you?"

Their eyes meet in an apprehensive intent gaze.

"Love is a bond that is only truly scene when someone is gone. Ya know?" continuing he said "it's what's left after some dies, and it's what you value when there with you"

Heavily sighing the scarecrow sighed, his eyes slid shut as his head bobbed down as he lay. His eyes flung open just to drift back down.

"You'll understand someday…"

'He's out like a light' Iruka laughed silently. Iruka was still puzzled and was pondering what the jounin said.

"I love you" the words slipped from the lazy dolphin as he slide closer to the warmth of the body.

Now, he understood the words the the jounin spoke to him. it haunt him. he wished that he could still feel the warmth of that body. the body that made everything ok and alright. and the body the conforted him, but most importantly...that love him. Clouds surrounded him. A storm would some soon. 'Looks like I'm not the only mourning' tears were threaten to come back. He was a chounin. A ninja and ninja don't cry.

Iruka had lost his angel.