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Chapter 4
Chris
So tonight was it then. Lady Katherine and I were to be off to the first worthwhile ball of the year, the Layfield annual ball. It was sure to be full of extravagance, fine, brilliant colors adorning pink cheeked maidens as they were twirled by men with painted on smiles. The scene would surely seem all to perfect as if the couples gracing the sparkling dance floor were no more than tiny dancers spinning atop a fantastic music box, as though life was that simple.
Sighing, I looked over my wardrobe as Matt and Christian both stood behind. Christian offered his opinion on various things when I asked, and Matt grumped as usual. Bloody hell! Could that feisty stallion not be cooperative for a moment or two perhaps? A couple of times I heard Christians' palm connect with Matts' flesh, drawing a growl from the darker man, and sending fire through my body. I almost dismissed Christian at the second slap, I thought of using the excuse that I would teach Matthew myself how he was to behave. Now, however, was not the time for such things so I bit into my lip and tried to clamp down on my impulses.
I was not having so much luck with that, as my mind wandered from what to wear and the colors of the rich fabrics blurred as I imagined throwing Matthew onto my bed and tasting him, touching, hearing the sounds that he makes and making those sounds with him.
"M'Lord?" Christian asked lowly, snapping me out of my lucid day dream.
I would have turned on my heel and barked at him, I would have shown him the scowl that was crossing my face, but as of now it was in my best interest to stand with my back towards him...until I could calm myself.
"Christian, go tell Adam to ready the carriage." I heard only one pair of footfalls heading towards the door and some shuffling behind me, letting me know I was now alone with my prize man. The things I wanted to do to him had my mouth going dry, my tongue felt numb and heavy inside my mouth, and I struggled for words at last getting out one.
"Matthew." I barked, beckoning him to me and swallowing hard before being able to go on. "What thinks you of the royal purple velvet?"
I still had not turned to face him, knowing that if I did I would give into my impulses and right now was certainly not the time to do so. He stayed quiet which prompted me to turn a little to pin him with what I hoped would be a glare. He was standing so the light from the gas lamps cast half his face in a shadow, making the lines of his strong features seem chiseled beautifully from stone, his eyes so dark and glimmering as deep, untouchable depths, his wild curls tamed at the nape of his neck, his head bent towards the floor.
"Matthew." I prompted, growling more this time. He snapped his head up, his chocolate orbs burned with hatred and he bit down hard on his thick lower lip which at this moment I wanted pressed to mine. The simple action nearly wrenched a whimper from me, but thankfully I managed to cover it with a sigh. "Well Matthew?" I choked out.
His jaw worked silently for a moment before he dropped his eyes back to the ground and spoke.
"I think that whatever you show up in would be overkill for your fiancé. It is she who should be adorned in silks and velvets as bright as the feathers of a peacock, not you." He brought his head up again and our eyes locked as he continued. "Yet what I say has no bearing on this conversation, you will do and wear what you please. So go on and wear the purple velvet, for it does bring out your eyes!" His chest was rising and falling rapidly, his eyes wide as he realized what he had said. Without another word he dashed from the room, leaving me standing there doubting my own hearing.
Surely he had not made such comment, or perhaps it was laced with sarcasm that I had not noted, my senses clouded by my own arousal. Shakily I chose the purple, and dressed myself, running my eyes over all the details in the mirror. It did bring out my eyes, and the blush that had painted my cheeks as I began to think of impressing Matthew rather than Katie Lea who my focus was to be on. My intended wife was certainly what needed to be on my mind, not this lowly, animalistic, unruly servant of mine. But still, he remained plaguing my thoughts even though I literally shook my head in attempt to clear it.
Disgusted I went to the dresser, a ceramic pitcher and bowl were placed there, and shakily I poured some water and splashed my face. Please stop. I pleaded with the thing inside of me that made these feelings persist and not just persist but seemingly increase. Damn it. God damn it!
"Sir, Copeland is ready for you." Christian said, ducking back into the room. His eyes shifted over me cautiously and I sensed that he was forcing the smile on his face. "You look most handsome, M'Lord." He straightened the cuffs of my coat and fixed the buttons I had done up wrong in my bothered state. His hands softly roaming over me had me shifting from foot to foot, fidgeting beneath his touch."Perfect." He brushed a lock of hair from my face, and even that was enough to make me shiver.
"Enough!" I did not mean to shout at him, but I did. He shrank back a bit and offered a lowly apology.
"Christian, it is no fault of your own." I offer lamely. "Matthew and I had a disagreement..." I trailed off and thought of how Christian was going to reprimand him again with a stiff slap.
"I do not doubt it m'lord, if I may be so bold as to say, that unmanageable cur is better off in the stables shoveling dung, not gracing the hallways of the estates and catering to a fine man of your standing. He will surely never learn his place. Perhaps a good, sound, whipping would change his mind, but I have my doubts."
A good sound whipping, oh Christian, perish the thought! My breeches became insufferably tight and my head was throbbing with pain. The ball seemed more and more like a tedious chore rather than an entertaining social gathering of the elite.
"Perhaps." I offered out as a choked response to Christians' suggestion. I must get myself in line or he shall start to wonder and worry over me and I need not be tempted to confide in him, as much as I longed for it. I had doubt that even a good man such as he could hide the look of repulsion that such secrets of mine would surely produce if he were to know them.
"Would you like for me to have him reprimanded whilst you are away tonight?" The tone in his voice instantly has my guard up.
"N-no. Perhaps if he does not settle down into his new role in the next week, then we shall take up the reigns of his discipline."
Christian nodded and I waved him away. I needed just a few moments to get myself in order. Obediently and with a bow he backed from the room. If only I could count on him to keep my secret I would lay it upon him now, it is such a heavy burden to carry upon my shoulders, and more so upon my heart.
Trying hard to forget my situation, I went to the basin and once more wetted my face and took deep breaths until the tightness in my loins receded. Once I was able to walk without a limp I headed for the door. Out in the hallway my boot steps fell dead. Matthew was at the other end of the corridor and had my cook up against the wall as he ravished her mouth and his hands roamed her petite frame. I wanted to look away, but I found myself intrigued by the tableau, and even a bit jealous. His hands, after all, belonged to me—and on me. Her panting filled the air when he pulled away to nip at her slender neck, and I snarled--unable to help myself.
"Matthew!"
They sprang apart. Matthew stared at me with heated eyes that I wished--no I craved for him to look at me with, and she with a red face. "Ms. Piper, get you to your quarters for the night! I shall deal with you in the morning." She curtsied and all but dashed away as her mop cap fell off of her head as her raven tresses trailed behind her like shadowy fingers.
"As for you Matthew, await me in my chambers. I shall deal with you when I return."
He growled and for a moment I thought he would not heed me. Part of me prayed that he would not so that I might have the excuse to lay hands on him. But at last he stormed past me and into the room, slamming the inner chamber door.
Katie Lea
I waited in the front parlor and watched as my uncle refilled his brandy sniffer for the third time. We were both dressed to the nines. I wore a gossamer creation the deepest red, almost blood like in its deep coloring. The cut was rather daring, and my uncle certainly did not approve, but if I am to be married to a foppish dandy then I wanted his tongue and all others to hang out when they saw me. I was after all a woman fit to be lusted after, and it pleased me to see that lust dance in the eyes of many men.
As for my hair, it was done in a simple up sweep and dark tendrils framed my face. It gave me a rather exotic look which I expected would turn heads, and surely it would impress the stuffy Duke Irvine.
I supposed I should have been happy that I was betrothed, after all with my coloring I might have had a difficult time finding a suitable match, for I am not blond with blue eyes and cream white skin as seems to be the popular stock of women. Not to worry, I am an exquisite, dark, rarer kind of beauty.
Bored, I flicked my eyes back to Uncle. He too is dressed to kill, no doubt he will look for some widow to pass the time with. His dark green brocade was intricately embroidered with gold and silver thread in the leaf and vine pattern that he was so fond of. His vest was gold and his breeches a soft butter tan. He shall most assuredly turn heads tonight, but not more than I.
A knock sounded at the doors and we both looked up as Kingston escorted Duke Irvine in, a grimace on his face. He sauntered over to me, the way he moves his hips seemed exaggerated for a man, and he bowed to me. He did look rather handsome in the royal purple ensemble, the velvet decorated with subtle gold detail. The colors brought out the sunny gold of his hair and the piercing hue of his eyes, which I had to admit were lovely, though they seemed to hold a lack of interest. He smiled rather stiffly and took my hand and pressed a kiss to the back, but let go almost immediately, as though he was not very keen on touching me.
"You look wonderful, my dear." He murmured as he straightened up and greeted my uncle.
With little ceremony we headed to the carriage. He held the door open and helped me in, as though I could not do such things on my own. All these rules, they tire me so! I rolled my eyes after he rounded the coach to slip in on the other side as I studied the lavish inside. In fact, it was certainly one of the most elaborate ones I had ever seen--other than the Baroness de James that is. Dark velvet covered the seats and there were lap blankets already out. The gas lamps flickered warmly as the coach trundled down the cobblestone street.
The Layfields did not live more than a few blocks away, and in no time I was being helped back down and I smirked as the handsome, blond, footman gasped when I passed him. We were shown into the ballroom, a lavish expanse. Lord Layfield spared no expense. His ball room was known widely as the most elaborate, invites to his festivities were highly coveted. The room was surely a sight to behold, the floors polished wood with intricate inlays in dark mahogany and gold detail. The walls were paneled with white, gold accents and cameos framed in leaf and vine designs. Even for the evening the room was airy and well lit, tall, beautiful stained glass windows arose from the floor and vaulted up towards the ceiling, fine silk curtains of deep satiny greens were tied back with gold ropes. Between the expansive windows were marble carved statues and busts, all boasting of Layfields storied wealth. Lastly, the high vaulted ceiling was painted with rich, intricate murals and from the high ceilings hung elaborate chandeliers, the numerous crystals catching the light and winking brilliantly. The massive room was filled to nearly overflow with guests all just as decorated as the room itself. Women swept across the floor in bright colors as though they were blooming flowers, their beaus just as richly adorned as displaying peacocks with puffed chests as they tried to impress the finest women. In one corner of the room, a band played a lovely waltz, the song soft under the chatter of the elite who peppered the room in their costumes.
All talk ceased as Duke Irvine took my arm and escorted me to the dance floor, people parting for us to make our way. Slowly the chatter built again and my smirk widened as every man we passed during our dance stopped us and asked for the next with me. If the Duke was jealous he did not show it, in fact I did not think I had felt his eyes on me at all thus far this evening. As we took another spin around the room I leaned close to him, my lips just scant inches away from his ear and I whispered lowly.
"What is bothering you M'lord?"
He jumped as if surprised and I laughed; throwing my head back slightly so that he could view the slender column of my neck and perhaps entertain fantasies of pressing his lips upon the exposed flesh.
"N-nothing that concerns you m'lady. T'was a disagreement between my servants." His lips formed a wavering smile and I bit my lip, causing it turn a deeper shade of red.
He frowned, and I kept myself from rolling my eyes. I did not know whether I should be offended that he was uninterested in me, or if his frown was simply an expression that he was displeased that perhaps I was being too bold in my actions. He did rather seem like the proper, stuffy type. He had probably never bent a rule of society a day in his life.
I tried to form my face into a pleasant expression and look into his eyes. Despite the pretty color of them they had a dull sense to them, and the lack of feeling in them just bored me. I was now sure that he was looking past me, his thoughts clearly engaged elsewhere. Was it so much that I desired eyes that glowed with mischievous fire? I did long for such things, for strong arms that would lead me to the coat closet and wrap me in shadows, as fingers boldly unlace my corset and ghost over my trembling flesh.
"And what is troubling you, m'lady?" He asked quietly and stirred me away from thoughts that made my skin grow warm.
"You!" I bit out under my breath, his face shocked at my bluntness.
"Excuse me?" He huffed, a glare deepening the blue of his eyes.
"N-nothing. I mere spoke before thinking. Occasions such as this bore me, and from your similar expression I gather they bore you as well." I tried to back pedal as my face grew warm. His eyes lit from within. There was the fire I was looking for, and I dropped my eyes. I felt that perhaps I had pushed my boundaries too far for a first outing. He chuckled and I looked back up, amazed that the simple sound and action changed him.
"You are right, dear. They do bore me something dreadful!"
"Then why are we here?" I prompted, tilting my head slightly so the tendrils of hair lay against my face invitingly.
"For the simple fact that we need to make it known that we are no longer on the market, my love."
I laughed lightly; he seemed rather practical as well. The dance soon ended and he lead me over to the plush seats that lined the wall, beautiful deep wood designs with clawed feet, the cushions clothed in black velvet.
"Would you care for a drink?" He asked as he bowed formally to me, a lock of his sunlit hair tumbling over his face.
"Of course."
He nodded and melted into the sea of bodies that congregated for the start of the next waltz. With a sigh I looked out over them and drank in the sight since I know that after the three weeks I'll never see the inside of a London ball again, which will not necessarily be a great loss to me. But certainly I will never dance with another man, not the cocky and brash Lord Ziggler, not the self-adoring Count Mizanin, not that fine young specimen, Duke Morrison, oh the lady to win him is quite the lucky harpy! Nay, I shall from now on dance with only one man, the one I am to marry, and despite the notoriety of his name, the notion does somewhat sadden me.
I was not left sitting for long, lost to my thoughts, when my second dance partner came and whisked me out onto the floor, whispering hotly in my ear as we twirled. Surely it was because I was now spoken for that they showed their interest; yet I played along, batting my lashes and acting coquettishly. The few times I seen the Duke he was standing and talking to my uncle, Lord Calaway, and Lord Layfield. The latter whom can't seem to take his eyes from me as he tugs his waist coat over his belly, only to have it ride up once again.
As for the Duke he does not seem so hard pressed about these silly London boys who have their hands all over me, yet I suppose I can count that in my favor. If he does not mind it now, then he surely shall not mind it once we're married--if he displeases me enough that I should be forced to take my pleasure elsewhere.
At last we said our goodbyes and wished everyone well as we passed and made our way to the doors. The Duke looked like it was a burden that he would rather not do, but it was required. Once out in the carriage he and uncle bantered tiredly as they undid their waistcoats and popped buttons on their collars.
"Why is that they keep these affairs so bloody humid?" Uncle asked as he fanned himself with his silk kerchief. "Would it be such a bother for someone to open the balcony doors and let some air in?"
The Duke laughed and mopped his forehead with his kerchief and flicked his eyes over me before he produced a clean one and handed it to me.
"You seemed a trifle warm there yourself Katie Lea." He smirked.
I took the offering but glared at him, how dare he insinuate that I was sweating? It was simply improper and disrespectful. What kind of man was this? Did he have such a little grasp on the rules of the ton, or does he just not care if I am offended? I patted at my chest as it rose and fell. Covertly I watched him from under lowered lashes to see if he is too was watching me. He was not, and with a sniff I handed the kerchief back and turned my head to stare out the windows as the carriage rolled down the street.
I swear, he seemed to be more taken with my uncle than myself! In fact he had paid more attention to him than me over the course of the evening. How outrageous! When he was turned away from me I made no qualms about hiding the vicious scowl on my face, as Uncle looked over the Dukes' shoulder and gave me a silent warning to shape up.
We arrived back at my home, and Uncle invited Lord Irvine inside to share a drink. For me of course, there would be tea sipped from dainty China, even though I would rather have the same as they. My scowl morphed to a smirk as I thought of the times I had sneaked brandy and spirits from Uncles' hoard without him knowing. I can be sneaky, when I must, even if I must with my own husband, though I pray it shall not come to that.
Chris
I really did not wish to go in, yet it would have been extremely rude for me to have left without having at least one drink with Lord Regal, and I did rather enjoy his company. He looked quite handsome this night, dapper in the rich green with his hair falling boyishly over his forehead. Closing my eyes tight at my wandering thoughts I scolded myself mentally and attempted to push them back and away from the front of my mind.
Kingston ushered us into the parlor where William took his waistcoat off and tossed it carelessly over the back of the large chair by the marble fireplace, logs glowing warmly within the hearth. Once more Katie Lea was perched on that hideous settee. It looked completely out of place and absurd with her ball gown against it. I slowly paced the room and pretended to be interested in the garish decorations on the wall. Even though it was only minutes before Kingston returned it felt as if it were hours; my mind constantly flew back to my solar where another awaited me--although not as eagerly as I awaited our meeting.
Thankfully our conversation was rather short, because I was having difficulty paying full attention to Lord Regal as he droned on and threw back the strong liquor, and repeatedly pushed his mousey hair away from his eyes. Now and again Katie added in a word or two to our conversation, but she seemed completely bored, and at times her remarks bordered on sarcasm, to which her Uncles eyes fell harshly upon her with warning.
By the time I was back in the carriage, darkness had fallen and the cobbled streets lay in shadows and the stones glistened slick with the soft mist of rain that had started. Once I was alone relief washed through me. I no longer needed to fight the annoying thoughts and fantasies that had been erupting in my mind all day. Vividly now, they thrilled me as the carriage bumpily traced through the old ruts that lead--though it seemed on this night painfully slowly--to the Irvine estate.
Finally, I was able to abandon Copeland and the snorting horses for my home and for what awaited me. My eager footfalls sounded quickly across the marble flooring as I nearly ran through the house and fiddled with buttons on my clothing as I went. I leaped the stairs two at a time and reached my destination hot and out of breath, for a number of reasons. I steadied myself against the wall to gather my wits for a moment, chastising myself that I let my person become so possessed by not just these desires--but more specifically by this man. My nose wrinkled in disgust that it had come to this, that I was so ruled by this--this dirty, despicable slave. Just by touching him I was sullying myself, but it could not be helped. I wanted nothing more than to touch him, to feel that worthless parasite writhe against me.
Grudgingly, I had to admit to myself that despite his lowliness, he set me free unlike any other I had ever had before him. Just now, just in this moment, perhaps I could forget my place and his. Perhaps I could for such brief time, cast aside the shackles society has placed on me, and realize my yearnings. For soon, I would have to be much more discrete in my dalliances. I did not need for my wife to discover my sin. Before entering, I offered up a short prayer of forgiveness for what I was about to do, as I always did. I wondered why I still bothered, knowing that forgiveness was far from my reach, for I could not bring myself to repentance for these things. The only hope for me was to shut down my deepest desires, and I had already tried that route, sadly failing myself, failing God. Sighing, I entered the room and locked the door behind me, perhaps if I hid behind my thick oak doors, He would not see me as I partake in my sin.
And the Lord God called unto Adam, and said unto him, Where art thou? And Adam said, I heard Thy voice in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked; and I hid myself. And the Lord said unto Adam, Who told thee that thou wast naked? Hast thou eaten of the tree, whereof I commanded thee that thou shouldest not eat?
Yes Lord, I have eaten from that tree, and the fruit is so sweet.