Author's Note: I bet you must be thinking – what kind of 'very soon' is this?! – I sincerely apologize!! We were so caught up in our tight schedule that we… forgot all about this… honestly, sincerely, really, we are soooo sorry. Forgive us!!
Btw, the song used in the previous chapter is entitled 'The Way You Look at Me' sung by Christian Bautista.
Disclaimer: We do not own Rurouni Kenshin
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Chapter 19: Words Seem Quite Impotent to Bear My Heart
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Misao made up her mind. With newfound determination shining in her eyes and courage coursing through her veins, she lunged for the gun, standing in front of it.
Wonderful timing.
BAM!!!!!
The bullet pierced into her torso, but Misao successfully grabbed the gun with ease from the very stunned man. Hitting a tree due to the impact of the shot, Misao coughed out crimson blood and used her remaining strength to throw the gun away. She then collapsed to the floor.
"Next time you want to… kill someone… make sure… there isn't… anyone… around…" Misao muttered weakly, blood gushing out of her torso, her tear-stained face ghostly white.
'I did it… I'm finally able to… be of some use to you, Aoshi…'
"K-KISAMA!! KUSO GAKI!!!" The assassin screamed, pointing an accusing finger at her. He kicked her where the bullet went in, causing Misao extreme pain.
"UGH! Thanks to you, my boss will have my head knowing I failed to assassinate that… that… Kensatsu heiress!" The assassin mumbled after beating up a now unconscious Misao.
'But… this girl… what is she? Why did she jump in front when she knew I was about to fire? Wasn't she crippled by fear? What drove her to… She doesn't know anything… Or does she…?'
Aoshi spun around, shocked by the loud sound.
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'Was that a gunshot?!'
As if answering his question, he saw two figures illuminated by the moonlight.
A man in black… a woman in a gown…
…a navy blue gown?
A NAVY BLUE GOWN?!
'Misao's gown?! What the hell!!!'
Aoshi's mind began to race. He immediately sprinted to the site, fear and panic overcoming him.
'NO!!!!'
'Don't tell me that was Misao…'
'She was shot?! Oh please, no!!'
'Who the heck was that guy?'
Upon reaching the place, all his fears were confirmed. He felt an unbearable pain squeezing his chest. His face went pale. There was Misao sprawled on the floor, a pool of blood underneath her. The man in black was just standing there, hovering over Misao. Aoshi could not contain his rage and sorrow anymore.
'HE SHOT MISAO!! H-HOW… WHY?!'
He grabbed him by the shirt, shouting and demanding for answers. The man simply looked at him, shocked. Getting no information whatsoever, Aoshi punched his jaw again and again, eventually dislocating it. The man dropped to the floor, now rendered unconscious thanks to Aoshi's assaults. Aoshi then rushed to Misao's side, tears freely falling as he squeezed his eyes shut, hugging her.
'Misao… what… what happened…? MISAO!!!'
There was Misao, blood gushing out of her torso, bruises and cuts everywhere. Aoshi held onto her tightly, afraid of losing her, afraid to… let go. With trembling hands, he checked for a pulse and, much to his relief, there was a faint beating. Gathering Misao's bloody form into his arms, he sprinted to the mansion.
'Misao… what the hell happened?!'
'Please… please be alright!! You… You're going to make it!!!'
'Just… hang in there!!!'
Upon arriving in the mansion, Aoshi shouted, requesting… demanding immediate treatment.
"ANYONE!! GET ME A DOCTOR!! QUICK!! NOW!!"
Aoshi shouted, his voice trembling with emotion. Not long after, Misao was rushed to a nearby hospital. Aoshi was a wreck – his emotions were all over the place. He kept a firm grip on Misao's frail hand. His gaze locked on Misao's bruised face. It took all his will to prevent himself from completely breaking down.
'How could I have failed to protect you?! If only… I was there…!!'
Aoshi's head whipped up upon hearing the doctor's footsteps. He greeted Aoshi with a smile.
"She's going to make it." He said. Aoshi couldn't contain his joy upon hearing the news. He buried his tear-stained face in his hand, letting out a trembling breath which he didn't know he was holding.
"But, she lost a lot of blood. She'll need a blood transfer as soon as possible…" The doctor drawled. Aoshi was alarmed.
"Use mine." He firmly said. The doctor looked at him, shocked.
"Are you serious? We're not even sure if-"
"Just use mine! Get all my blood if necessary!! Just… Just… Just as long as it will save her!!" Aoshi insisted, his voice cracking with emotion. Sighing, the doctor accepted. Much to his relief, Aoshi's blood type would be compatible with Misao's. They entered the room and the doctor prepared the tools required for the transfer. Aoshi's troubled gaze fell on Misao. She was lying on the hospital bed, tubes attached to her. Her pale face was at peace, shocking Aoshi.
'Why is she so… peaceful? What does that mean? She… She's supposed to be…'
"Are you ready?" the doctor inquired.
"Anytime." Aoshi replied firmly.
"We still aren't sure if it'd be safe to get this much blood from you-"
"It's fine. Like I said, I'd give all my blood just as long as she'll live!! Just as long as… I'll be able to see Misao smile again… Get all my blood and just… give it to her!! Just for her to… live again…" Aoshi interrupted. The doctor knew he was dead serious and so proceeded. Aoshi kept his gaze on Misao.
'Just wait for a little longer, Misao… Hang in there!'
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Misao's POV
Gosh… I feel terrible… it hurts so much… what… where am I? I feel so light-headed. What happened…? I can't move… I guess I was able to… save them… I hope… I think I'm dying… Am I dead…? I'm supposed to be… but, I feel so… weak. I can't think…
Stuck in between reality and bliss, Misao could hear faint voices.
Dare?
"Anytime."
That voice… Could it be…?
Mumbled voices again, then
"It's fine. Like I said, I'd give all my blood just as long as she'll live!"
…Aoshi…? What blood? Who?
"Just as long as… I'll be able to see Misao smile again…"
Did he just… But he… Am I dreaming?! What's happening?! Aoshi??
"Get all my blood and just… give it to her!"
Why…? Why'd Aoshi sacrifice… just for… me…? I must be dreaming…!
"Just for her to… live again…"
Aoshi… is… is this true…? I'm so lost right now… I'm so confused…!
After catching all that, Misao plunged into unconsciousness once more.
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'Misao…'
After the blood transfer, color filled Misao's face once more, and she was warmer. Yet still cold… still… unconscious…
Aoshi was sitting on a chair beside her still form, the faint beating of the Electrocardiograph softly reverberating across the room. Aoshi couldn't help but recall everything he had seen so far. He still lacked the answers he so wanted.
'Too close… too close, Misao…!'
He held her hand, wanting to see those beautiful orbs of hers, that sincere smile and the warm look she always held.
'Misao… wake… wake up! Tell me… you're fine… you're fine now! Right…? You… have to be! Smile… open your eyes… MISAO…!'
Hot tears flowed down Aoshi's cheeks, his eyes closed tightly and teeth clenched. His body racked with sobs. Fresh teardrops fell onto Misao's hands. He wanted to know… he wanted to hear her laugh… to hear her talk once more… to say his name. His weeping only worsened and he knelt beside her, his hands still holding hers.
"You're alright… you're alright…! Don't… please don't… I love you… I love you… I… love you too much…!"
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Everyone rushed to the hospital once they heard the news. Each of their faces held the same expression. They went in, looking at Misao and feeling worse. Kaoru broke into sobs, Kenshin comforting her. Soujiro couldn't hold back his share of tears, but he did succeed in preventing his breaking down He sat beside her bed for hours, just looking and talking to her. Enishi, Sanosuke, Megumi, and Tomoe were sick with worry, trying to find out what had happened. And Aoshi, he sat there the whole time, unmoving, his eyes filled with emptiness, his gaze afar, his mood gloomy. He was in so much pain.
'Misao… why? Why did this have to…'
Aoshi shut his fatigued eyes, letting out a quivering breath.
'Please be alright… you're alright… you have to be alright…!'
For what seemed like the hundredth time that evening, Enishi sat beside Aoshi, offering him a cup of hot tea.
"You're tired." Enishi reasoned.
Aoshi shook his head and buried his face in his hands.
"I… I just want her to wake up… I just want her to… be… alright-"
Aoshi wept once more, Enishi now comforting him.
"I-If… only I… I was… there to…" Aoshi struggled through his tears. Enishi gently patted his back.
"It wasn't anyone's fault, Aoshi. No one ever anticipated this would happen…" Enishi gently consoled.
"I could have… could have… instead of her…!!" Aoshi mumbled angrily.
"Stop beating yourself up, Aoshi. If you were the one in her situation now… she would be in so much pain." Enishi said.
He was right, and Aoshi knew it. But he still hated himself for failing to protect her. In front of Enishi, his façade crumbled. He let out all his grief and anguish; he finally broke down and poured out all his emotions.
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The soft beeping of the Electrocardiograph accompanied by Misao's gentle breathing filled the room. The rays of the sun managed to pour into the room through the small spaces between the blinds, giving the room a soft glow.
'Atatakana…'
Opening her heavy eyelids, Misao gazed at the ceiling absently for a while.
"Ah. You're finally awake!"
Slowly moving her head to the side, Misao caught sight of a man in a white gown.
"How are you feeling?"
Misao's eyes finally adjusted to the brightness of the room, but she felt so weak, and her body hurt.
"…terrible…" She managed to drawl out.
"I thought so…" The doctor said, chuckling.
"I guess it's to be expected. Well, if no one donated blood, you'd still be unconscious."
'Who? Blood?'
"Donated… blood…?" Misao said weakly.
"Yes. You lost a lot of blood. Good thing that man's blood was compatible with yours. He wanted to give all his blood; we even had to stop him. You seemed to be very dear to that… what's his name… uhm… that tall guy." The doctor said.
'Tall…?'
"A-Aoshi…?" Misao whispered, daring to hope.
"Yes, yes. That was the name."
'Aoshi… Aoshi? AOSHI?!'
Misao suddenly remembered what she caught in her state of light-headedness.
"He… donated blood… to me…" Misao stated.
"Yeah. He's in the other room asleep now, very exhausted. He was waiting for you to regain consciousness. Finally gave in to sleep…" The doctor informed, shaking his head.
'AOSHI?! B-But… why?! If it's true then… I…'
Misao's brow furrowed. She frowned.
"Why am I still alive…?" Misao asked.
"You want a philosophical answer, or a medical one?" the doctor said, smirking. Misao stared at him blankly.
"It's because of him. He brought you here."
'Aoshi… he… he did?! But… why? He saved me… he saved my life…!'
Tears cascaded down Misao's cheeks. She was simply overwhelmed.
'In the end… it was still him who… saved me…'
'Losing blood sucks the life and energy out of a person…'
'And yet he waited for me to…'
'Daring to hope… if that's so… everything that happened…'
'But it can't be, can it?'
"…formed by all those misunderstandings and false notions!"
Misao still stared at the ceiling. She was having a fight inside. What Aoshi did proved Soujiro and Kaoru correct, but… everything Misao had seen proved her understanding to be correct.
'Which one is true?!'
She closed her eyes in frustration. She was getting nowhere. Then, an idea struck her.
'Why not visit Aoshi…? I want to see if he's… okay.'
Misao then tried to get up, the pain in her torso preventing her from any further movements.
'Shoot… this is harder than I thought…!'
But, with determination, she managed to limp out of the bed… she got halfway to the door when suddenly… the door burst open, revealing a very disheveled, excited, and stressed Aoshi catching his breath. He saw Misao clinging onto a pillar, who looked like she had been caught stealing something.
"A-Aoshi…!"
She tried to get closer, but her legs gave in and her torso throbbed in protest, making her fall to the floor. But before she could connect with the hospital tiles, Aoshi caught her and embraced her tightly.
"Aoshi?"
He didn't say anything, he just held her close, his face buried in her hair, his breath and body trembling. Was he… crying?
"Are you okay?" Misao asked. Aoshi's eyes widened in shock. She was asking if he's okay? It should be the other way around…!
'Misao… finally…'
"You're… finally awake…!" Aoshi mumbled, his voice shaking. Misao was worried. What happened to him? He isn't usually like this…
"I was so worried…! But now you're safe… and… that's all that matters." Aoshi said, his voice still shaking with emotion, his embrace tightening. Aoshi was so relieved; he savored this moment. Finally, he was able to hold Misao in his arms. He breathed in her scent and kept her close… close to his chest, where his heart was. Misao then gently placed a hand on his back.
"I'm… sorry." She said. Aoshi fought back another wave of tears that was about to crash. Odd; the stoic, emotionless ice block Aoshi has been crying a lot lately…
Nothing is going the way it should…
"No… there's no need to apologize… you never needed to…" Aoshi said softly. Pulling back to see Misao, he took a deep breath.
"Will you… hear me out?" Aoshi asked, his tone unusually soft. Misao slowly nodded.
Shivering and in tears, I repressed all my regret for… failing to protect you. I cried all night…
"Misao… you're a different woman. You have something that others don't… you have that… compassion. Compassion; it's not pity and I know that, because you don't pity people; you have compassion for them. All those little things you do, those seemingly small acts, maybe no one has ever told you or even noticed, but I'm telling you that I-- We… all notice that. And for that, thank you. You're such a thoughtful person, and I… I have failed to protect you…" Aoshi said sadly, looking away. Misao looked at him worriedly. So that was what's been eating him up. Slowly and gently, she took his big, warm hands into hers.
"Aoshi… you don't need to feel that way at all… it's okay. Just knowing that you want to and that you try to… protect me… is enough… I'm happy knowing that." Misao said, smiling warmly and softly, her eyes full of love. Aoshi was taken aback by her words and her… smile. It was that smile… that smile full of kindness, love, and compassion. The smile he wanted so much to see again…
But there's something about your smile that somehow healed my heart, and in your eyes I found the strength to stand up once more…
Aoshi felt warm and immensely happy inside.
"Misao… your love for the people around you made you go through extreme lengths, made you get hurt; and you go that extra mile for the sake of others. As I said before, you're different. Compassion, love, sacrifice. You're just really… selfless. I don't know just how and where you get that. We human beings are selfish by nature, yet… you're able to contradict that. And for that, I…I'm drawn to keeping you safe from all harm. I want to be the one that protects you. I… I was so afraid I'd never get to say this… but… I…"
I cried all night, but now it seems dawn is breaking...
"I love you." Aoshi said, smiling uncertainly. His eyes were so full of sincerity and love. There. Finally, he had said it.
"Aoshi…" Misao whispered. Her ocean green orbs were wide. A pretty shade of pink tainted her cheeks.
'He… loves… me…? Is this the answer…? Then… it isn't a bluff, right? His sacrifice for me… and now this… Ne, Kao-chan? Sou-kun? You guys… were right… all along…!'
Misao was still shocked. Yet… yet she felt so happy. Aoshi looked anxious and… shy. He was waiting for an answer.
"I'm not dreaming, am I?" Misao said softly. Aoshi chuckled softly and patted her head affectionately.
"No, you aren't…" He said, a wider, more certain smile gracing his lips.
Misao's mouth stretched into a smile as well. Aoshi pulled her back into his arms, both of them closing their eyes, their mouths smiling happily.
'Finally… I'm just so… happy!' Misao thought. She was so overwhelmed… she didn't care that tears were freely running down her cheek, staining Aoshi's shirt. Noticing the developing moisture, Aoshi gently pulled her from his embrace and examined her.
"Are you okay? What's wrong…?" He asked. Misao shook her head.
"It's… nothing… I'm just… really… happy…!" she said, smiling through the tears. Aoshi's eyes softened and were about to emanate tears as well, but he held it in. And gently, very gently, he planted a soft, sweet kiss on her forehead. He then brushed her tears away.
"I love you… so much." Aoshi said once more, this time, his voice didn't falter.
"And I love you…" Misao happily replied. The two just held each other, both relieved and ecstatic. And they stayed like that for what seemed like eternity, both in a wonderful bliss. They have finally found each other.
But there's something about your smile that somehow healed my heart, and in your eyes I found the strength to stand up once again…
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Author's Note: Aww… that's so sweet. It had to take such a drastic event to bring out the romantic side of this guy, eh? But, as always, spontaneous acts are the best! Scripted ones are the worst. Hah! About the title… hmm… it's a line from a poem. I think it fits rather well, don't you think so? The reason I chose this title was… well, it describes how Aoshi feels… and vice versa. Well, supposedly this is goodbye. BUT, we'll add one more chapter. For your sake.
P.S. Thanks so much for all your support! We love you all. Ah, reviews… they bring us such joy…
Translation:
Kisama-YOU! (think sinister or extremely pissed)
Kuso Gaki-Darn Kid / Insolent Kid / Idiotic Kid
Atatakana-Warm