Disclaimer: I own only the plot of the story. The names of the characters belong to S.M.

CHAPTER 1 – Kate

1988

KPOV

It was a warm autumn evening, the city of Port Angeles buzzing with visitors filling its shops and restaurants. I didn't come down here often, as I found the hourly trip too boring for my taste. Also, the fact that I was almost seven months pregnant put an already dump outlook to whatever joy I might otherwise have felt about this get together.

But I was missing Tanya and Irina, my two best friends since high school. Even though I was now a happily married woman, living with my darling husband, David, in Forks, I always found time to meet with my girls to catch up.

I rubbed my swollen belly, smiling at the small kick from the angel inside. "Oh, Alice," I crooned at my baby, "you are going to be such a bundle of energy! How I'll ever be able to keep up with you, I don't know."

My baby was the reason for this dinner date with my friends. They were throwing me their own "baby shower", as they called it. I had already received their gift for the baby, and I was in love with it. It was a beautiful crib, off white with small cute designs on, set up by the delivery people. I couldn't wait to see little Alice sleeping in it!

Hmm, I better stop daydreaming and keep my mind on the road, I thought. I glanced at my watch; I was meeting Tanya and Irina at the Bella Italia to eat my favorite dish, mushroom ravioli. My mouth watered at I remembered eating the exquisite food. Maybe afterwards I should try that chocolate soufflé and …ouch.

Another strong kick brought me back to reality, along with a loud honking sound. I looked in front of me, my eyes wide open, as I watched another car swerving from its course and heading straight at me.

I turned the wheel to the right, trying to avoid the head-on collision, but to no avail. I heard the crashing sound, metal on metal, and suddenly, I was spinning out of control. Then, I remember stopping abruptly, and found myself lying on the driver's side, still strapped in my seatbelt, the steering wheel pressed hard on my belly.

I was disoriented, and trying to breathe was a difficult task for me at the moment. My whole body hurt like hell, and I was bleeding from numerous lacerations.

I instantly put my hands on my baby bump. "Baby, are you okay, give mommy a nice kick," I was begging my unborn child. But nothing, no kick. My heart stopped beating. No, not my Alice. Please, God, don't let anything happen to my Alice, I whimpered to no one but myself.

Suddenly, the graveness of the situation hit me. I was trapped inside my mangled car, seriously injured and terrified that my baby was hurt, with no way to help her. I searched around me for my cell, but it was nowhere near me. I started panicking for our lives. Let's hope somebody saw the accident and called for help.

I started feeling dizzy and light-headed, my heart beating fast. My arms and legs were getting weaker with every passing minute, and I knew I was going to die.

Tears were running down my face, as I thought of David and my baby. Please, forgive me, I begged them both. I am sorry….and then I blacked out.

Two days later….

I woke up in pain. I opened my eyes, and scanned the unfamiliar room. Where am I, I wondered. The uncomfortable bed and the awful smell of antiseptic made me realize that I was in a hospital. David was asleep on a plastic chair next to me, holding my hand. He looked..terrible. He was pale, his face drawn from worry. Poor darling, he is going crazy for me and the baby. But we were alright now, weren't we?

Suddenly, I sensed that something was missing. Where is my baby, I wondered, where is Alice? My eyes fell on my belly and I pressed my hands on my mouth to muffle my scream. There was no baby bump any more. My baby was gone. But, where is she? Where is she? Where is my Alice? Is she okay? She must be alright, she can't be…

I curled on my bed, trying to hold myself together. No, no, I told myself, she can't be…dead, she is alive and healthy, she has to be.

"NO!!!" I screamed, "ALICE!!"

My screams startled David, who jumped up and quickly took me in his arms, trying to calm me down.

"Kate, honey," he was rubbing my back, "please calm down. You are hurting yourself." He held me closer, but I struggled against him. My pain was choking me, my heart was breaking…How could he hold me? I was alive while our baby was not. The floodgates opened wide and I was screaming my lungs out now.

"Alice! Alice! I am sorry! I am so sorry! I never meant to hurt you! David," I turned to him, "please forgive me. I loved her, you know I did! It is my fault, I was so selfish! If I hadn't gone to Port Angeles, nothing would have happened, and our baby would be alive!" I wailed, waiting for his wrath to be unleashed. He should hate me, I killed our baby. I was a murderer…

His embrace never loosened up, his eyes stared at me with so much pain and love. I stared back, astonished.

"Don't you hate me, David?"

"Why should I hate you, darling? I love you. The only person I hate right now is the bastard that caused the accident," he said softly.

I blinked twice. "But, I…I…because of me…Alice is…dead…" I whispered now, ashamed.

He chuckled weakly and kissed my head. "No, Kate," he said smiling, "our baby is fine."

"But, where is she? What happened after the crash? Tell me?" I begged.

He exhaled loudly, wincing at the memory. "Someone called 911, and they came shortly afterwards. They managed to set you free quickly and get you to the hospital. I was notified immediately and ran here like a bat out of hell. I must say, love, you were in a bad shape. The doctors had a hard time getting you stabilized. Then, you went into premature labor, and they had to perform an emergency c-section to get the baby. But," he paused, "both you and the baby are fine."

"Where is she? When can I see her?" I asked him impatiently. "I can't wait to see her."

He smiled again, releasing me. "If you behave, I will go and check with the doctors when we can go and see her at the Neonatal ICU."

"I'll be here," I promised and he left. I was overjoyed. I would see my baby. Soon, I would be holding my perfect baby in my arms…Thank you, God, I prayed mentally, for keeping me and my baby alive and well.

DPOV

As I watched Kate holding our baby in her arms for the first time, my eyes were brimming with unshed tears. I struggled with myself to hold them back, not wanting to upset my wife. I hadn't been completely honest with her about our baby, I couldn't find the strength in me to tell her the truth, at least not now.

The doctors had told me that, while Kate's body had taken the brunt of the impact, the baby was affected, too. The steering wheel pressing on Kate's belly had injured Alice's spine, its extend and consequences still unknown. They started treatment immediately to avoid any inflammation in the injured area, and they will be checking Alice periodically to monitor her condition.

I can only hope for the best. I thank God every passing second, from the bottom of my heart, for saving both Kate and Alice. I only pray that my baby girl will always be healthy and strong. I hope….

1989

KPOV

Alice is such an adorable little girl! She is so tiny that her father sometimes holds her like fragile china. I try to tell him that she really is a tough cookie, stubborn and opinionated, but he won't listen. Men…

But I can't help but worry for my baby. She is happy and cheerful, clever and mischievous. But, there is something wrong with her, I know it. And it's all my fault.

You see, although she has already taken her first steps, four months ago, she wasn't walking around much. The first time she walked, I was so proud that I didn't notice that she was whimpering, I thought she was just afraid to fall.

Afterwards, every time she tried to walk, she took less steps and her whimper turned to crying, which alarmed us. We took her to her pediatrician, who just attributed her problem to her growing up and sent us away.

David and I have decided that, if the problem persists, we should see an orthopedist. I just hope we won't need him.

1990

DPOV

Unfortunately, Alice kept complaining about her legs, and we consulted many doctors to get some answers, with no success.

Our last hope was Dr. Tyler, a well-known orthopedist, who, after conducting various tests on her, called us inside his office.

He motioned us to sit, and sat at the opposite side of the desk, with the test results in his hands, and a solemn expression on his face. Oh, it can't be good, I thought, scared to death.

"Mr. and Mrs. Brandon, I have done every test possible that I thought would help me determine your daughter's problem, but, I have to admit, for the first time in my life, I can't give you an straight answer," he pursed his lips.

We were confused, Kate breaking the silence first. "What do you mean? You have done so many tests, and you still don't know what is wrong with Alice?" She stood up and started pacing angrily. "What is the matter with you people? You are doctors, for God's sake! Do something, help us, no, help my little girl!" She stopped, holding back her tears.

I took over. "Alice used to be so lively, and now she is a confused two-year old, afraid to walk around the house, because it hurts too much. We are at our wits end. If you cannot give us an answer, is there another doctor who can?"

He stared at us for some time, his chin resting on his fists. "You never let me finish. I know that the problem is in her spine, where she was hurt during your accident. What I don't know is the exact nature of the problem, so as to decide the right treatment.

"For the time being, I will prescribe a drug regiment to fight inflammation, to increase blood flow and to lessen the pain when she is standing or walking. However," he paused, thinking of the right words, "I think it is best if Alice doesn't…use her legs much."

"What? Not use her legs? How is she supposed to move around? What will happen when she is older?" I asked him, dreading his answer.

"You will have to carry her, for now. Later, she will have to use a wheelchair. Of course, if she keeps taking her medication and after a lot of physical therapy, she may be able to walk very short distances; to get in and out of bed, to use the table or the bathroom."

I leaned back in defeat. "So, there is no hope for her? She will always be stuck on a wheelchair? Isn't surgery an option here?"

He shook his head. "She is too young, and the procedure is too risky for her now. Maybe in a few years, new drugs or surgical procedures will be found that will be more helpful. Until then…" he trailed off.

I looked at Kate's eyes and I recognized the feeling swimming behind them, the same like mine; what will happen now? She ran into my arms, crying her eyes out.

"What have I done to our girl? It's my fault….."

1993

KPOV

"Helen is not my friend any more," Alice shouted at me, when her father carried her inside the house. She had been to the house next door to play with their little girl. It was the second time she had gone over there and I was happy she was making new friends, willing to overlook her "problem". But I guess I was wrong.

"Why?" I asked. She took a deep breath, relaxing visibly.

"She wanted to play hide and seek, I told her that I couldn't. And she made fun of me!" she said, tears running down her cheeks, "she called me a freak! Why was she so mean to me?" She stared at me, waiting for an answer.

"Mommy, why am I different from the other kids? Why can't I walk?" her big grey eyes pushed a knife to my heart. I was floored from shame and guilt. What could I say to her? It is my fault, it is my fault, I chanted inside my head, I am the selfish bitch that is responsible for your pain.

David came to my rescue, knowing exactly what I was thinking now. He took Alice in his arms again, and shaking his head to me, smiled at her.

"It's her loss, baby, if she doesn't want you as a friend. Don't worry. Now, do you want to watch your favorite movie?" he asked her.

"Daddy, you are the best!" She squealed and gave him a sloppy kiss while he walked to the living room.

I choked back a sob and, turning my back to them, resumed on my cooking. Alice, forgive me for your suffering, I begged my daughter silently, as I prepared our lunch.

1995

KPOV

I checked the time again. They should have returned by now, the school was only twenty minutes away. I heard the familiar sound of David's keys on the door, and there he was, Alice in his arms as usual. He sat her down on the couch and went back out to fetch her wheelchair.

My heart broke at my little girl's expression. She was ashamed, mortified, hurt. What happened today at school?

David came back inside, putting the unfolded wheelchair right next to her. He nudged her shoulder lightly, showing her the chair. She nodded in refusal, her face pale white, her arms wrapped around her small frame. I approached her, and kneeled before her. She stared at her feet, not meeting my eyes.

"What happened, Alice?" I asked, stroking her hair.

Her eyes shone with brimming tears, her cheeks pink from emotion.

"I am not going to school again! I hate it!" she screamed, letting her tears run freely. "It was awful, mom. It was so hard to move around school with this stupid chair, and I had to ask the teachers for help. My classmates were staring at me the whole time like I was a freak show, while everybody was whispering behind my back." She threw herself at me, hugging me tight.

"I was so lonely, mom. Nobody wanted to be with me, to avoid the ridicule at being seen with the crippled girl. It is so hard…I can't stand it. Please, don't make me go back there!!" she begged me, sobbing inconsolably in my arms.

I held her close to my heart, whispering how much we both loved her and that we would always be there for her, trying to calm her down. My eyes shot up, meeting her father's. He mouthed at me that we would discuss it later and came near, putting his arms around both of us.

"Daddy," was all she said, and more tears came down her face. We let her pour her misery out, hoping against hope that it would make her feel better.

After she cried herself to sleep, David took her upstairs to her room, while I put lunch together and waited for him to return.

He climbed down the stairs slowly, and joined me at the kitchen table. We started eating in silence, neither of us daring to touch the sensitive subject of school. Most of the food remained untouched onto the plates, when he decided to speak.

"What now?"

"I really don't know, David. Maybe we should talk to her teachers about the other kids' attitude towards Alice. I don't understand these kids. Aren't their parents teaching them good manners? She may be on a wheelchair, but she is a human being, for God's sake, with feelings!" I said angrily, pressing my hands on my face.

He stared at his plate, contemplating his answer. He then lifted his head at me, speaking in a quiet voice.

"Sweetheart," he paused, "maybe it would be best for Alice not to go to school again. Today was very hard on her. I think she should stay home."

I was astonished by his words. "Are you out of your mind? And how is she supposed to get educated? How will she able to make friends if she is always here with us? They can't all be bad, they just need time to get accustomed to her. It was just the first week. It will get better after a few days," I said, not so sure of myself.

He looked horrified at the thought. "Are you really considering subjecting Alice again to a torturous experience like today? Kate, you can't go by trial and error on this case!"

I persisted. "Please! Let me talk first to the principal, see what can be done about the kids' behavior, and decide later. Let's give it one more try, and if they are still treating her badly, then we can home school her. Ok?"

He raised his finger at me. "Only if she agrees to go back." I nodded and picking the phone, I called the principal's office.

A month later…

DPOV

The principal was very sympathetic to our situation, and assured us that he would talk to the students about treating Alice properly. He only asked us to keep her at home for a day, to give him time to address the matter.

I also made sure to ask Alice's opinion about going back to school. We told her about our conversation with principal, and, reluctantly, she agreed to give it one more try.

So, it has been almost a month later, and things at school are bearable. The principal's talk seemed to do the trick, and the other kids never bothered Alice again. Those stupid enough to try and harass her were slapped with expulsion from school, so they learned their lesson the hard way.

Alice also seemed to be more at ease at school, as nobody dared to hassle her. She even managed to become acquainted with some girls from her class, who were gracious enough to always invite her at their table during lunch.

At least, she has people her age to talk to. That's something, isn't it?

2000

APOV

Middle school proved to be hard. Especially the first days were hell. Everything I had been through elementary school, I had to go through again here, the only difference being that the kids were meaner to me. It seems malice gets worse with age.

I understand they don't have to like me, but why must they be so cruel to me and always find joy in torturing me? And it's not that I can turn to my teachers for help. I don't want to be the cry baby again. So, I will have to bear the bitchiness, the stares and the whispers all over again, and I am not allowed to utter a word. I have to make up more lies for my parents, let them think that everything is going smooth here.

It will be three very long years for me….

2003

APOV

This is my third beginning of a new era in school. After I managed to survive through the nightmare that was middle school, I feel like a cockroach; I can survive even a nuclear war!

You won't believe what I have been through in middle school. And, now that I am proceeding into high school, I am fully aware of what is in store for me.

I can only imagine what kind of pranks and torture I will be subjected to this year. Teenage boys and girls are borderline sadistic when it comes to me. It seems that all they have in mind while in school is how to make my life a living hell and not get caught.

I chuckled mirthlessly. If only I count the times that I will be pushed, pulled, shoved, ridiculed, I shall be a rich girl….I just pray that their plans don't have me end up at the ER, and I surely hope God will give me strength to endure the chaos and torment of high school. And, please, God Almighty, please, help me be accepted at a university as far from here as possible. Let me live through this and make a new start in life. Please…?