"Sam, this is Freddie my neighbor," said Carly looking between her and me. "Freddie, this is my best friend, Samantha."
"Carly," said Sam, in a whiny voice.
"Sorry, this is Sam," said Carly, correcting herself quickly.
"Call me Samantha and your dead meat," she threatened.
"Why?" I ask, kind of feeling scared.
"I just don't like my full name, okay dork?" Sam said, angrily.
"I think it's a pretty name," I say with a small smile.
"Wipe that smile off your face, before I do it for you," she said with a hand raised.
I immediately disliked this overly violent and obnoxious girl, however deep down something in my head told me she wasn't really that vicious. Maybe it was me bringing out the worst in her. What did I do? I still ask myself this question all the time. What was it that made her instantaneously hate me? At that time, I had the most ridiculous crush on Carly and I guess I made it too darn obvious.
"I made you breakfast Carly," I said, grinning widely.
"Oh Freddie, remember how we're just friends?" Carly said for the tenth time that week. "Which means you have to seriously get over this crush of yours…"
"But I am over it," I say to her. "I'm in love with you but you just want to be friends-and I'm totally cool living with that constant pain."
Let me skip some time, because throughout these years I could see my crush slowly evaporating into a very distant memory. To cover this up though, I kept trying to be flirty and asking Carly out or to be my girlfriend. Then came something I was never prepared for, something that was so out of the blue and to this day I still ask myself: How did it even happen? Not that I didn't like it but it confuses me a lot.
"Freddie's never kissed a girl, never, not once," said Sam seriously. "I heard him say so himself and Carly's a witness."
Okay, so it wouldn't have been that bad if she didn't say it into the camera and we were live on the internet-broadcasting to millions of people worldwide. Fear and dread flooded every part of me. Why did she have to go and say that? I lived in hiding for the rest of that week-well apart from coming to school on Monday, only to be ridiculed and mocked for my 'lack of experience'.
It was totally embarrassing, yet deep, deep down, I couldn't really hate Sam for doing it. I don't know why, but something told me, she wanted attention, not from our viewers but maybe from… me? It was crazy, it was unbelievable, it was insanity.
I was sitting in a camping chair on the fire escape, thinking over the past week and what may have caused Sam to say such a thing. I even reminisced about the past couple of years. It was true, we had grown slightly closer over the years. My thinking was interrupted by a little knock on the window behind me. I turned around and saw her, the girl of my thoughts with the curly blonde hair and wide blue eyes. She had a slightly crooked lip smile on her face. I motioned for her to come in. she did and then sat on the ledge while I got up out of the chair and went to sit by her.
"I'm sorry… for telling people you never kissed anyone," said Sam.
I couldn't believe I was hearing what I was hearing. Sam was… apologizing, and to me? she went on to say she was sorry for every prank she had pulled on me since eighth grade. Now we were in ninth grade and so much had changed since then, well actually I had changed a little-such as not taking her insults to heart-because I knew that she was just having her fun. Sam hadn't changed much-still as obnoxious as ever.
"I was just gonna say that…" I start to say.
"…we should kiss?" Sam finished for me.
"You're gonna break my arm now right?" I ask her nervously. That was my greatest fear-having my arm broken by Samantha Puckett.
"No," she replied, simply.
I breathed out a sigh of relief. My head spun. She had read my thoughts exactly. Especially if it was 'just to get it over with' which it was. There was no other way, Sam could be my first kiss. We did kiss and throughout it I felt some buzzing going through my head. I regretted pulling away, because I felt like she was melting into it just as I did. However I didn't look at her straightaway but I felt her soft gaze on me as she stood up slowly.
"That was umm…" I start to say slowly.
"Nice," she said, smirking ever so slightly.
"Yeah, nice," I agree.
It was awkward but in a kind of good way. Does that make any sense to you? I know it completely muddles my brain, but perhaps to some other people, it does make sense. Before she left I remembered our little promise.
"…and we go back to hating each other, as soon as it's over," said Sam, as she slides over toward me.
I stop her in her tracks. "Hey," I say, and she turns around to face me and I smile nicely. "I hate you."
Sam scoffed lightly-I knew that she didn't mean it. "Hate you too," she said gently.
After watching her leave, I sighed slightly, and leant back on the ladder I was sitting on.
Ever since that sort of magical night, I have never forgotten the confused expression shown on the girl's face. Sam is complicated, one second I think she despises me but then she turns around and does something unlike her aggressive self. Now I think back to after our kiss and wonder how much had changed between then and the present day, you know, today.
Sam and I were coating our freshly made cupcakes with sticky icing, and we both couldn't stop smiling.
"What are you guys doing?" Carly asked both of us and it was like she was amused to see both of us getting along and doing something together for once.
"Playing 'Cupcake Slam'," I say excitedly.
"It's a music video, you need to look hotter than you usually do," I say, not really meaning to be so… flirty around Carly.
"Well thank you," she said a little perplexed but flattered at the same time.
"Where's Sam?" I ask her.
"She saw the dress you wanted her to wear for the music video, threw a corn dog at it and walked out," said Carly simply.
"Ah," I say and roll my eyes. Only Sam. None the less, I was disappointed that I couldn't see Sam in a dress.
…
"Good video, Freddison," said Sam. Was that a… compliment from Samantha Puckett?
"See what you did? You killed Fred!" Sam shouted at me and then twisted the skin on my arm which made me cry out in pain.
"All I did was give my honest opinion!" I retort back to her.
"Hey are you guys gonna be okay by yourselves till Carly gets back?" Spencer asked, holding a bottle of ketchup and a surf board.
"Yeah," I say hesitantly as I look at Sam.
"Sure," replied Sam, after looking at me she rolled her eyes.
"I thought you were going to have a nap?" I asked Spencer.
"Yeah, but my magic meatball told me I want to go surfing," he said simply and squirted some ketchup in his mouth then shrugged. "Later."
"Hey, when did Freddie start looking so hot?" Sam's look alike asked her. I could help but smile at what I was over hearing.
"Okay," said Sam defiantly. "This girl is nothing like me!"
"Okay, who's next?" Mr Henning asked the class.
"Sam does," I say suddenly.
"Dude…" she starts to say something but stops as our teacher calls her up to the front of her class.
"What's up Freddie-o?" Sam asks me.
"I'm not lending you any money," I say as I bend down to get some books out of my locker.
"I have a little job for you to do," said Sam, smiling.
"Well, I have no idea what it is, but no!" I reply quickly.
"Tell me one good reason why I should believe you," I say loudly.
Sam returns. "Because I came here," she said simply. "Have I ever come to you for help, for anything?"
I thought about this as I sat down by my apartment door-since it was locked. Sam had a point. She never come to me for help before-maybe she was right about Missy's devious plan.
"Aww," I say, slightly disappointed. "I want to see Sam beat up TV writers!"
"Just standing next to it, makes me feel like a princess," she said and took a bite out of a huge stick of salami. She offered me some. "Salami?"
I scoff. "No thanks 'Princess Puckett'," I say kind of flirtingly.
"My sister Melanie is coming home tomorrow and I've peeved off about it, okay?" said Sam, looking annoyed.
"I've been to your house many times and I have never seen this 'sister'," I say in complete disbelief.
"Yeah you have," she retorted.
"Then how come I've never heard of her?" I ask, mockingly.
"You've seen photos of her," said Sam. "You just didn't know it was her, because we're twins."
"Oh twins," I say, sarcastically and then raise my voice. "Twins! Yeah, I have an uncle who's an avocado. Yeah, we call him Uncle Green Mush."
…
"If you're 'Melanie'," I say, putting quotations on the name. "How would you like to go on a date with me, this Saturday night?"
"That'd be great! I'd love to," the girl said, smiling sweetly.
"Oh you'd… really?" I replied in complete shock.
"Yeah," said Melanie, I mean Sam… I mean…oh I don't know who I'm talking to anymore!
"Okay then," I said, and sat back down.
"Well that was unexpected," commented Carly, looking at me.
"Yup, coz I'm a genius," I say simply.
"Huh?" asked Carly.
"Sam would rather chew broken glass than spend a whole Saturday night with me," I explain. "There's no way she's going through with this."
"You asked Melanie," said Carly.
"Okay," I said, deciding to play along with their little joke. "You can say I have a date with Melanie, but I know I have a date with Sam."
The idea suddenly made me inhale the gulp of smoothie I took.
"What?" exclaimed a worried looking Carly.
"I have a date with Sam!" I yell and I'm worried.
"I made you some raisin bread," I said to Shelby Marx.
"I hate raisins," she replied. I start to eat all of the raisins out of the toast and then hand it to her.
"There you go, raisin bread, without the raisins," I say, handing her the plate.
"Oh that is pathetic," laughed an amused looking Sam which I decided to ignore.
"Don't worry," said an irritated sounding Carly. "Pretty soon we'll all be free, I'll turn my back and you guys can resume kissing behind it!"
"We promise," said Sam. "No more secrets."
"Never again," I agreed.
…
"How long did you guys kiss?" Carly asked both of us.
"I don't know," I said and looked over at Sam.
"Like… seven seconds?" said Sam.
"Seven… eight…" I say nodding. Probably the best eight seconds of my life…
"He's not doing anything!" Carly said to us.
"What, why?" Sam and I exclaim simultaneously.
Sam turns around and slaps my face and I slap hers in response, which she appears surprised I would do something like that. I, myself, don't really know why I did it.
"Girls who are rude to me, don't get a bag of bacon," I say, holding up the bacon in front of her face.
"Wow, Freddie," she said in monotone. "I never realized what a hot handsome hunk of boy you really are…" and she snatched it out my hands.
I grinned. "Better," I say simply.
…
"Because 'Girl's Choice Dance' is stupid," she said, rolling her eyes. "If a guy wants a date with 'Mama' he should ask me… and pay for it… or he can just give me the money and stay out of my life."
"Wow," said Carly.
"What? There's no guys at this school that don't make me sick," said Sam shrugging then she walked over to me. "This is good bacon. Any desperate girls ask you yet?"
"Actually two, Jamie and Ariana," I say, proudly. "but I haven't given either one an answer, in case someone else wants to ask me?"
"No," said Carly.
"Yeah," I say disappointed, but I don't think it was because Carly turned me down.
"Hey guys, are you ready?" I ask both girls standing in the Shay apartment.
"S'up Fredward," greeted Sam, almost sounding affectionate.
"Hey Sam, want some good news?" I ask, approaching her in the school hallway.
"Sure, tell me," she replied, turning around to face me.
"Last iCarly broke our record," I say, opening my laptop.
"No way!" Sam exclaimed excitedly.
"Yes ma'am," I say and we do a little fist bump to celebrate.
…
"What, why?" we ask our principal simultaneously.
"Dude, we've gotta stop doing that!" Sam says to me.
"So, you have a plan?" I ask Sam, quickly.
"Yeah," she replied and tipped the whole basket of golf balls over so they rolled across the lobby floor. "Argh! Freddie!" she screams out.
"Wha..?" shouts Lewbert. "Who tupped them over?"
"Him," says Sam simply and points over her shoulder at me.
"What? No, no, no, no!" I try and deny her accusation but it doesn't work so while Sam makes an escape to get her cell phone back from the crazy doorman's office.
"This is where you live?" Sam asked, as she looked around my new apartment.
"I have as much right to Freddie as you," said Sam suddenly pulling me toward her.
"You do not," said Carly quickly. "Freddie loves me!"
I groan loudly because I'm sick of the two of them fighting like this. "I just want things to go back to the way they were!" I say sadly before walking off.
I had saved Carly's life from a passing Taco truck and now she was in love with me, or so I thought.
"Yeah, savor it," said Sam.
"Savor what?" I ask her.
"The love," she said. "The 'Carly' love."
I snicker a bit. "Jealous?" I say mockingly.
"Gross," she replies quickly-maybe too quick.
"Can you break something else," she said quickly. "Like Freddie's arm, Freddie's leg, Freddie's face…"
"Aww Sam," I say part teasing her. "If you love me, just say so."
"Nyehh!" Sam says.
"Nyhehh!" I respond in kind.
"You're training him?" I ask Sam in disbelief. Maybe that's a bit of jealousy showing through.
"Yeah, who wouldn't want to see Gibby pound the fudge out of you?" said Sam, smirking.
"Wait one question," said Sam suddenly. "Why are you so stupid?"
"Carly," I say to my best friend seriously.
"Sam," she says to the girl.
"I'm curious," said Sam, shrugging.
"Yeah, until she hopped on the train to 'Has-Been' Island," said Sam, rolling her eyes.
"Well technically you can't take a train to an island," I explain to Sam which she glares at me. "See an island is surrounded by water so…"
"Dude," she said threatingly.
"I'll shut up," I said quickly.
"Why aren't you in your eighties costume?" I ask the girl sitting on Carly's couch.
"Why aren't you more appealing?" Sam asks me, teasingly which makes me roll my eyes.
…
"It's refreshing when she hurts someone that's not me," I say, kindly and I notice the amused look on Sam's face.
"This is humiliating!" I say, as Sam is rubbing my mouth on the glass.
"Do you wanna get out of here or not?" Sam asked me, harshly.
"Can I not do this, then?" I ask the girl, struggling out of her grasp.
"Sam's right, Freddie," said Carly, a bit worried. "I mean, you pretend to be 'in love' with this psycho girl and then we're free to go."
"It's wrong on so many levels," I shout out to both Carly and Sam.