Chapter 7

His head reeling from the suggestive comments that had been thrown his way, and still not quite sure exactly how he'd been outmanoeuvred so fast, John Paul found himself dragged outside, where finally the cold air brought him to his senses. Yanking his arm free he took a deep, calming breath.

"I can't just go...my jacket, my bag...they're still back there...I have to..."

"Screw them, they'll be fine, you can pick them up tomorrow."

With no warning, John Paul was slammed back against the wall of the club, his mouth taken in a scorching kiss that stole his breath. Heat crawled through his body and the shiver that raced through him had nothing to do with the low temperature. As his mouth was released, he was shocked to feel fingers trailing teasingly over the taut, exposed skin of his stomach before leaving their conquest to determinedly fasten up the buttons of his still gaping shirt. Seeing John Paul's confusion his tormentor laughed, the warmth of his breath a painful delight as it seared cold skin. Job finished, once more John Paul was taken by the hand and he could do nothing but follow mutely as he was led purposefully across the almost deserted street to where iron railings overlooked the River Liffey.

Feeling totally helpless, he allowed himself to be pulled further along the pavement, eventually being brought to a halt beneath the sprawling branches of a tree, its protective shadows almost completely hiding them from the road beyond. By this point he was beyond questioning anything they did, especially as his cock was still rock hard and his thoughts were totally scattered from the possessive way his mouth had just been taken. Bemused he lifted his fingers to brush the tender skin of his lips, before almost shyly raising his eyes to meet those of the man who had just turned him into a shuddering wreck. He shivered again at the enigmatic look he found there.

"Shit, will you stop that?" At John Paul's confused glance a hand was waved towards the thumb that he was still subconsciously rubbing against his swollen bottom lip. "That is unless you want me to take you right here and now?"

Seeing the seriousness in the other's expression, John Paul dropped the offending digit quickly, causing soft laughter to erupt out of the mouth that had caused all of the problems in the first place. He threw back a tentative smile of his own even as his face heated in a soft blush. Watching warily, he saw the other move to sit casually on the back rest of a street bench that was almost lost in the darkness. Even when he was still, there was sensuality to his body that made John Paul restless, made him want to be closer. He couldn't stop his eyes from appreciating his beauty, as he sat, legs apart, leaning forward slightly so his arms could rest on his knees, hands dangling casually between his lean thighs. Swallowing with difficulty, he knew that if he just let his gaze drift a little further...that if he just followed the line of those lean thighs a fraction higher...

"So tell me about him?"

The voice was low, seductive...and brought John Paul's attention crashing back to the mouth that had so intimately plundered his own. Struggling to breath, he tried to makes sense of what had been asked. "What?"

Wicked amusement shone from dark eyes, as if he knew exactly where John Paul's wayward thoughts were at. "Tell me about this boyfriend of yours...I want to know what he's like...apart from being a fucking moron for letting you out alone, that is?"

The sultry grin that accompanied the words made John Paul ache in places he didn't know he had. "Hmmm well to start with maybe moron is slightly harsh." The choking sound that met his reply made John Paul bite his lip to hide his own smile, before he felt himself growing more thoughtful. God, how did he answer this? Looking down he concentrated his attention on the floor. "He's beautiful." He risked a quick glance up under his lashes, pleased to see a stain of colour on the other's face that even the darkness couldn't mask. Encouraged he continued. "And he's smart...most of the time...except when he gets these half cocked ideas and schemes in his head that never work and usually end up crashing down around him."

The choked sound came again, quickly disguised as a cough. John Paul kept his head down, fighting a fluttering in his chest. "He's argumentative and always thinks he's right...and he's the biggest pain in the arse I know." John Paul lifted his head slowly. "But I love him more than life...and right now I'm not sure I deserve him." The eyes in front of him held his own for what seemed an age, until John Paul almost forgot how to breathe. Finally he was released.

"You screwed up, huh?"

The question was softly sent and John Paul pushed his hands deep into his pockets as he shifted, turning his back, to stare sightlessly across the steadying calmness of the river. "Yeah...big time."

"And what...the asshole won't forgive you?"

Shooting a quick look over his shoulder, John Paul felt his mouth twitch, "A moron and an asshole...he's going to love you." Looking away again, he took a steadying breath. "Actually you're wrong...he forgave me. I guess I just don't get why?" Quietness settled between them. John Paul reached out to grasp the railings, leaning over slightly to watch the water drift slowly past. The soft slapping sound it made against the wall beneath him helping to sooth his racing heart. He sensed rather than saw movement as a pair of hands came to rest beside his own. Feeling him at his side, their shoulders almost touching, he sighed. "I don't get how he's handling what I did. The Craig Dean I thought I knew wouldn't be able to."

"You don't think he should have...forgiven you?" There was an edge to the question, a hint of steel mixed with a slither of hurt. "Do you see him as weak because he did?"

"Fucking hell, no!" John Paul twisted round slightly his expression almost angry as he stared at the face so close to his own. "I'd never think that...me and him...we're more than that." He stared hard into the distance feeling a little lost. "It's me I see as weak for putting him in this position." He shook his head slightly as if trying to regain focus. "It's just I know him...what he's been through. I know his insecurities. I know how jealous he gets...how possessive. And because of that I don't know how we move on from here."

The air around them seemed to still, background noises becoming even more distant, muted.

"Sounds to me like you're wallowing...were you always such a drama queen?"

John Paul recoiled as if he'd been punched in the stomach. "What the fuck...wallowing? You think I'm ..." His protest came to a stuttering halt as a hand teasingly reached out to ruffle his hair.

"You're so cute when you're pissed off, did anybody ever tell you that? I think I'd like to keep you around."

In disbelief, John Paul watched him lean forward until the tip of his nose was softly rubbing against his own. How the hell did you say angry at a jerk like that? Eyes narrowing suspiciously, John Paul, knew he had to up his own game here...he was being played somehow and he'd be damned if he knew where it was leading. But it was hard to think of any clever comebacks when even his damn nose was being seduced.

"Tell me about you?"

This time the question was so ridiculous that John Paul couldn't hold back his laughter. "Fuck off...I'm not standing her freezing my bollocks off telling you stuff that you..." A soft kiss stole the rest of his words. His lips, already parted could offer no resistance to the tongue that gently invaded. He could only groan wantonly as he was teased, tasted and slowly devoured.

Again before he could think straight, the question was repeated. "Tell me about you...through his eyes." The demand was breathed into him, almost smothered beneath a second taking of his mouth. "I want to see you as he does." This time the words drifted to him, finding their way through his drugged thoughts, as the lips caressing his, purposefully withdrew, leaving him feeling bereft.

"I can't...I don't know how he sees me." Still trying to figure out what this was all about, John Paul squirmed beneath the determined look he was given. Wanting just to sink back into the heat of the body that stood next to him, he looked longingly at the moist lips so close to his own.

"Yes you do...tell me."

Fuck. As he stood, undecided, a draft of air swirled around him making him shiver. Suddenly feeling the cold bite of the night against the thin cotton layer he wore, he wrapped his arms around himself protectively, as he tried to think of where to start...what to say. Did he really know how Craig saw him...had he ever known? Lost in his thoughts it took a moment to register the second pair of arms that gathered him close, pulling him back into the hardness of the body that had moved to stand behind him, back into the shared warmth of a coat that had been opened wide to include him.

Murmuring his appreciation, he felt himself melting. Shit, did the bastard never play fair! Loving the intimacy, the closeness, he hesitantly tried to find an answer...by going back to the beginning. "I guess he first saw me as just another McQueen." Not sure what else to say he forced himself to think more deeply about their first meeting. Unaware of the soft smile that played across his lips, he snuggled further into the arms holding him. "To be honest I think he resented me a little...resented me telling him what I thought, resented me trying to help him...I don't know...he was a prickly sod back then." Feeling the body he was pressed against tense slightly, he almost felt a smug sense of satisfaction. Maybe he wasn't the only one who was cute when his chains were being rattled!

"Jesus, were you two ever happy...makes me wonder why you bother?" The words came out disgruntled.

John Paul laughed, the sound a gentle flutter between them, as he sought to appease, his head turning slightly. "Ah but then we became friends." He saw the smile he was waiting for.

"Good friends?" One hand moved to slip beneath John Paul's shirt, fingers stroking the smooth contours they found there.

John Paul let his head fall back slightly to rest on the shoulder behind him as warm lips began to nuzzle his neck. His own slow smile coloured his reply. "Best friends."

"I bet you were a sweetheart back then?" The tone was teasing.

"Nah...Not me...He was the one with doe eyes and a pout to die for." The soft bite to the tender skin beneath his ear made him yelp but didn't stop the grin that graced his mouth. "He was so fucking gorgeous I lusted over him for months...while he just saw me as..." He paused as he searched to find the words he needed.

"Saw you as what, John Paul?"

It was the first time that he had called him by his name all night...and their eyes met for a moment. "I think...I think he saw me as..." John Paul closed his eyes and really tried to see himself back then as Craig might have seen him. "I think he saw me as someone who was unconditionally on his side...someone he could rely on."

"His safe haven?"

John Paul slowly opened his eyes. Lifting his head he let his gaze brush over the other's face. "Maybe." His reply was whispered, not quite hiding the shot of pain. He still wanted to be that person.

"And you begrudge him wanting to be that for you?" The question threw John Paul for a moment but he was given no time to dwell on it, even though he knew the words were important. He stored them away for later as he tried to refocus on what else was being said. "And then what happened...how did you go from best friends to where you are now?"

"How long have we got?"

The snort that met his answer had John Paul rolling his eyes. "I told him I loved him, does that answer your question?" He turned fully in his arms, leaning in until their foreheads were touching. "And before you bloody ask, I honestly don't know how he saw me then...but I knew how I saw him. I was seventeen and he was my world. My sun rose and set with him...it still does."

"And yet here you are in my arms." Their noses came together again, just seeming to fit, as both let their eyes drift closed.

"I know. What can I say...I'm sick and screwed up!"

"John Paul?" His name was almost a caress.

"Hmmm?" Warm breath feathered his cheek and something about this moment seemed suddenly precious.

"Did he love you back?"

John Paul slowly lifted heavy lids to find himself drowning in the dark depths that stared right back at him. "Eventually...but this was us...we didn't do things easily." He was shocked at the low, husky tone to his voice...but this was their history being laid out here, his and Craig's and he couldn't help but feel every word of it. "First we avoided, you know...tried to pretend nothing had changed. Then we kissed..." Again he paused to take a steadying breath. Almost he felt the past, Craig's lips on his own, that tentative first meeting of mouths. He sighed, a slow exhalation of air before forcing himself to move on with a wry, sheepish grin. "Errm, then came the fighting I guess, oh and the not speaking for weeks." John Paul's expression changed. "Well until I found someone else that is and then the real fun started." Seeing the narrowing eyes, John Paul teasingly kissed the nose beside his. "Like I already said...the moron as you so nicely called him, does possessive and jealous like nobody else." He gave him an innocent look. "You wanted to know how he saw me..." His voice dropped intimately. "He saw me as his."

The words sat between them, intensely seductive... full of a taunting heat, an almost painful truth.

"And you're still surprised he's determined to keep you now...someone that possessive?" John Paul felt his stomach muscles clench at the implied ownership and he found himself being pulled almost impossibly closer. His breath caught painfully as their hips collided, the heat of their erections combining to almost make him want to combust. "Do you really believe, McQueen, that he'd just let you go without a fight? Don't you think he still sees you as his...that maybe he always will?"

The questioning statement hit John Paul hard and he couldn't help himself, crashing his mouth down it was his turn to plunder, his turn to push...until the body he held was forced back against the rough bark of the tree. Now it was his tongue that raged the sweetest of battles, sweeping aside all resistance to taste, lick and savour before the need to breath forced a partial withdrawal. Lips almost touching, their gasps mingled.

"And the jealously?" John Paul couldn't tear his eyes away from the face so close to his own as he demanded his own answers.

"Ah you mean why isn't he following you about looking green round the gills?"

John Paul shifted his weight, his knees almost buckling as their groins once more brushed against each other. "Something like that yeah?" His words were almost a groan.

"You want me to go back in there in his place and slug Matt for you?"

"Fuck no." John Paul gave him a warning glare.

"Spoil sport!"

Hands moved to grip his arse, tilting his hard on even more intimately forward. Just as John Paul was deciding which would be more painful, to leave his aching cock where it was so securely nestled, or to try to retreat slightly to restore his sanity, he was once more floored by a shift in mood.

"Maybe this boyfriend of yours is stronger than you think." Eyes wide, John Paul could only stare helplessly. Every part of him seemed to be held captive by the man in front of him...and somehow he knew this was it...this was what tonight had all been leading to. "Maybe he genuinely knows you're sorry and he needs to move on. Maybe he's prepared to believe in you, like you once believed in him and... maybe, just maybe... this is more about you now and how committed you really are?" The voice was determined and utterly free of emotion. "So the real question it seems to me is, how strong are you, John Paul McQueen? He's forgiven you...now are you strong enough to forgive yourself?"

John Paul, breathed in anxiously, waiting for that sick feeling in his stomach to take over... he prepared himself for its onslaught, only to be surprised when nothing happened. Tentatively he began to reach to rub the back of his neck before realising there was no tension to dispel. His heart beat rapidly with a strange kind of freedom that he hadn't felt for a while. He could sense eyes on him, and he stared back. "Took you long enough to get to the point!"

"Just add patience to the list of my many attributes." Ignoring the sarcastic grunt that met his statement, the question was asked again. "So...are you strong enough?"

Fighting sudden tears, John Paul lowered his hands to find their familiar place at the other's waist. Squeezing softly he let love shine from him. "Never let it be said I can't match whatever Craig Dean does."

"Is that so?"

"Hmm...mmm."

"So you're going to break my heart and go back to him?" A finger came up to brush away the telling moisture beneath John Paul's eyes.

"I never left him...and something tells me your heart will be fine...besides resisting you is good for my soul." Making a mockery of his words, John Paul used his teeth to tug softly at a bottom lip that was pouting enticingly in front of him.

"Well before you get too righteous, I don't suppose you'd like to screw up one more time...with me? For old times sake?" The suggestiveness was backed up by a pathetic attempt at a wiggle of eyebrows.

Appreciating the attempt to lighten the atmosphere a little, John Paul gave his own lust filled look as he let his still tearful eyes wander freely before coming back deliberately to lips left swollen by his own kisses. "For you...I might be persuaded...just this once." Leaving the temptation of the other's mouth for a moment, John Paul found himself instead distracted by the seductive movement of the tautly stretched throat before him. Grinning a little at the rapid swallowing his perusal had caused, he reached out with his tongue and licked.

"Shit."

Loving this, loving them...John Paul gazed up. The look that met his own stunned him...took away all humour, shattered all pretence It stripped them completely, left them both totally exposed...both achingly open.

"I guess it all comes down to what I asked you earlier...your place or mine?" Words almost became meaningless, the real communication happening elsewhere.

"Does it really matter? I'm yours whenever...wherever."

His mouth was suddenly taken in a brief, hard kiss that shook him to the bottom of his soul. It asked for and gave everything. When it ended John Paul was left... standing alone, as the man who was his world began to walk away. Needing a minute to gather himself he could only stare after him, unable to move.

"Are you coming or not?"

John Paul gave the softest of smiles, but it came from deep within and it held all that he was. "I guess I have to...you never did tell me where you live. I can hardly seduce you if I don't know where to find you." Still he stayed... just waiting, hardly breathing. Nothing around them seemed to stir.

"You've always known, McQueen...You just click those pretty ruby slippers of yours three times and repeat there's no place like home...it'll get you to me every time."

And suddenly the world came alive, the river flowed, the branches shifted, the muted sounds of music reached his ears...and he breathed easily for the first time it seemed in months. Stepping forwards, he could only shake his head as he fought to contain the swell of emotion. "And you say I'm the gay one in this relationship? Next you'll be throwing rainbows at me." Loving the dark petulant look that he got in return, he continued walking until he reached the arm that was extended towards him. Lifting his own hand, he placed it securely in Craig's outstretched one and squeezed it tight.

And just like that...he was safely back... in Kansas.