Chapter 5
Bruises

Author's Note: Warning. This chapter is a little fluffy and sensual.

(Bella's PoV)

The next morning, I opened my eyes, and I was almost surprised to still be on Isle Esme. It seemed like this was all a glorious dream. It was really an odd feeling, like I should be back in Phoenix, Arizona with Renee, and everything that happened in Forks was a long dream.

The first thing I saw was the light blue ceiling of one of the two bedrooms in the small cottage. I looked to my left and expected Edward to be resting against the headboard, waiting for me to wake up. He wasn't there. I sat up quickly, looking around for him, but it wasn't my eyes that found him. My nose caught the fragrant smells of what seemed to be bacon and eggs.

Was he fixing me breakfast? I wasn't even aware that he knew how to cook! Why would he need to learn that little skill, given that he didn't eat normal food ever! Was he trying to do something for me? I looked at myself briefly. I was wearing one of the lace lingerie outfits that Alice had packed. I grinned as I looked at it, recalling the night before....

Flashback:

I slowly trudged my way back toward the cottage. I was pretty upset with my husband. He was being very unreasonable. Why wouldn't he give his new bride what she wanted more than anything... well, almost anything... on the first night of her honeymoon?

I just wanted to feel close to my new husband. Closer than I had ever been to him. And he was making me feel as if the distance between us was expanding more and more every second.

When I walked into the cottage, Edward was sitting on the couch, watching a movie. There was a huge DVD collection in the living room. I could tell Edward was trying his hardest to ignore me, probably afraid that I would voice my wants again. But as I made my way through the living room to go into the bedroom, I could sense his eyes on me, and I swore I heard him grinding his teeth together. I couldn't blame him. I had just walked past him in nothing but a towel. Even if he was resisting obliging to my wishes, there were parts of me that I knew he couldn't resist.

Typical boy... even for a vampire.

I shook my hair around, exposing my neck to him as I passed right by the couch. I knew how much he couldn't resist the smell of my blood pulsing in my neck.

He ground his teeth together, loud enough for me to hear, and it only caused a grin to form across my lips. I seemed to be winning the battle.

"Bella, please," he whispered as I walked into the bedroom.

I didn't answer him. For once, I was happy he couldn't hear what was going on in my head. Maybe there was a way for me to get what I wanted.

I walked into the bedroom and over to my suitcase. As I pawed through the clothes, looking for something to wear, I picked up one of the lace pieces of French lingerie. As much as I didn't want to wear these outfits, I had to hand it to Alice. This was perfect for my plan. I slipped into the lingerie then walked over to the mirror. I made a face. Normally I would never be caught in this stuff. It was way too... lingerie-ish. Both pieces of clothing were see-through and it left nothing to the imagination.

And in a way it was perfect.

I grinned and returned to the living room. I walked to the couch where Edward was sitting and sat right next to him. I almost laughed when he looked at me with raised eyebrows. I pretended like I didn't notice.

I turned my attention to the television. I knew in an instant what the movie was. It was the version of Romeo and Juliet with Leonardo DiCaprio and Claire Danes. I rolled my eyes. Definitely not my favorite version.

"Great movie choice," I said, a hint of sarcasm in my tone.

"I like this version," Edward said, "Claire Danes makes a very beautiful Juliet."

I scoffed.

"What was that?" Edward asked, glancing an eye sideways at me. "Are you jealous of Juliet?"

"Not this one," I muttered.

"You're very biased," Edward said.

"Funny. I've never been called that before," I said, rolling my eyes.

Sarcasm seemed to love me tonight.

"I've always wondered what it would be like to live in Romeo and Juliet's time period," Edward said.

I raised an eyebrow. How could he think of that while watching this version of the story? It had been turned into a modern tale. Romeo and Juliet were definitely not modern.

"Romance was a whole different subject in that time," he continued. "It was more.... serious. Definitely more well-respected."

I stared at my husband. What about our romance wasn't exactly well-respected?

"What about Romeo and Juliet's romance was well-respected in their time period?" I asked, "It was a teen romance between the children of two feuding families. Both kept their romance secret from their family."

"Do I really need to explain it any better, Bella?" Edward asked. "I thought you were the expert on Romeo and Juliet."

"I never called myself an expert... ever," I said, "What are you trying to say?"

"Their romance wasn't...." Edward sighed, and I knew he was trying to find the right words, "Their romance wasn't based on sensuality!"

"This is about sex?!" I asked, a laugh escaping my lips.

Edward rolled his eyes and motioned to my outfit.

"I needed something to wear," I said, trying my best to sound innocent.

"Bella, I know you," Edward said, "You'd never want to get caught in that."

"Alice packed it for me!" I said in defense.

"Doesn't mean you had to wear it," Edward said.

"I'm trying out new things," I said, shrugging. "Besides, I am only here with you. And you've seen me with less than this."

Edward turned his attention back to the movie, but I knew he was thinking about our time on the beach just a few minutes ago.

I was getting somewhere. I stretched and laid on the couch. I put my feet across his lap. Edward looked down at my legs briefly, only for a mere second, then returned his eyes to the movie.

I played with my hair again, exposing my neck. I saw his nostrils flare up as my scent invaded it.

"Bella, please," Edward said.

"You promised, Edward," I said.

"I did," Edward said, nodding. "I also said it could wait."

"Until you were calm, right?" I asked. "You look very calm now."

"It''s a disguise," Edward said.

"Edward, when have you ever been calm around me?" I asked. "You were like this from the moment we met."

"Your point?" Edward asked.

"Just the thought of me excites you," I said, "You've said that before. So how could you ever be calm around me? You can't keep that promise, so why don't you just keep the other one?"

"Bella, be reasonable!" Edward said, and his voice sounded more strict, "I could kill you!"

"Then refrain from doing that," I said, "You've held back many times. I would think that you're an expert at it now."

"You wish," Edward said.

"You promised me," I said, and my voice was stone and resolved. "Since we've arrived, you wanted me to have some human moments to myself. Well, at least give me this human moment. It is my one last request before I become like you."

I could hear Edward gritting his teeth. He then picked up my legs gently and moved them off of him. I frowned. How much more could I do to convince him?

Suddenly, he stood up, then crawled onto the couch over me. It surprised me at first. He put his face on my legs and I could tell he was inhaling my scent as he crawled up toward my face. I could feel him shudder.

If I could hear his thoughts, I imagine he would have been trying to keep himself calm. He breathed in the scent of my belly and I felt chills up my spine as his face met mine. He inhaled deeply then closed his eyes.

"Edward?" I asked, softly, "What are you thinking?"

"It's becoming easier," Edward said, "And it would be even easier if you did not speak."

I nodded. He then lifted me up into his arms. As we left the living room and walked across the threshold of the bedroom, I could hear Leonardo DiCaprio's words:

"Is love a tender thing? It is too rough, too rude, too boisterous, and it pricks like thorn."

Flashback ends....

As I took another glance at my clothing, I discovered something very strange. I picked up something small and white from the fabric of my panties. I examined it closely. It was a small feather. How in the world....?

Then I realized exactly what it was. I turned my head, cringing a little. My neck seemed a little stiff. I seemed to have slept wrong, but that wasn't what was on my mind. The pillows on the bed were not the same color as I had remembered. In fact, the bed was different than how I remembered it.

I was not in the same bedroom. What exactly had happened the previous night? Why could I barely remember any of it?

Before I could move any further, Edward appeared in the doorway. I smiled at him, but he didn't return the smile. In fact he looked a little shocked, and worried.

"Edward?" I asked, as soon as I caught my voice, "What is it? What's wrong?"

"What are you thinking?" he asked me.

"I am wondering why you look so upset," I said.

His eyes tightened. "How badly are you hurt?" he asked. "The truth... don't try to downplay it."

"Hurt?" I asked, my voice high in surprise and wonder.

He raised an eyebrow and only looked at me. His lips were still creased in a frown.

I shrugged, and felt a little sore and stiff. Is this what he was talking about? Could he somehow sense that I was maybe a little stiff? It was nothing. It was always tough getting out of bed after a good night's sleep. It was my body's way of telling me it wanted to rest longer.

I was a little angry. How dare he ruin this perfect of mornings with his pessimistic assumptions?

"Why would you jump to that conclusion?" I asked. "I've never been better than I am now."

Other than the fact that the night before was a bit of a blur....

"Stop that," he muttered.

My turn to raise an eyebrow. "Stop what?"

"Stop acting like I am not a monster," Edward grumbled.

"How could I ever call you a monster?" I asked.

Edward sighed and walked over to me. He offered his hand.

"Slowly," he muttered.

I didn't know why he was wanting me to be slow, but I obliged. I took his hand and he pulled me slowly off the bed. He took me over to the large mirror.

"Edward," I said, clueless, "What –?"

Edward put a finger to his lips.

"Take a good look," he said, nodding at the mirror.

I looked into the mirror and blinked. Was that me? I looked at the large purplish bruises that were beginning to blossom across the pale skin of my arm. My eyes followed the trail they made up to my shoulder, and then down across my ribs. I pulled my hand free to poke at a discoloration on my left forearm, watching it fade where I touched and then reappear. It throbbed a little.

So lightly that he was barely touching me, Edward placed his hand against the bruises on my arm, one at a time, matching his long fingers to the patterns.

"Oh," I said.

I tried to remember what had happened after Edward had led me into the bedroom. I started to remember portions. I blushed at some of the parts I remembered. There were also things I didn't remember. For one, I didn't remember being carried into this room. It was definitely not the room we started in. Also I couldn't remember pain. I couldn't remember a moment where he held me too tight.

"This is what I was talking about last night," Edward said softly. "Bella, I am so sorry --"

He sighed, and couldn't finish his sentence. He threw his hand over his face.

My gaze remained on my features in the reflection as I tried to remember how these bruises could have formed.

I looked at him finally. He looked so miserable and yet it was so different from how I felt. I didn't feel the pain he thought I was in. How could I explain that I was happy... or that I had been happy a moment ago?

"Edward?" I asked, touching his arm.

No response.

"Edward?" I asked again.

He didn't answer. Great. I was not good at one-sided conversations.

"I'm not sorry, Edward," I said, resolute, "I'm... I can't even tell you. I'm so happy. Even that doesn't cover it. Don't be angry. Look at me. I am going to be fi--"

"Do not say the word fine," Edward interrupted me. His voice was so cold it made me shiver. "If you love me, you will not say that word."

"But I am," I whispered.

"Bella," he said, in almost a moan, "Don't."

"No, you don't, Edward," I said.

Edward sighed and took my arm again. He lead me out of the bedroom then across the hall to the other bedroom.

"Does that look like fine?" he said, pointing inside the bedroom.

I stared in disbelief. I finally realized where the feather on my lingerie had come from. The tiny white feathers were all over the room. I looked for the pillows and all I found was a pillow case. It looked like it had been torn – no, it looked like it had been pulled apart with teeth.

I almost laughed. "Did you bite the pillow, Edward?" I asked, incredulously.

"I don't know," Edward said, and it almost sounded like he was embarrassed.

This time, I did laugh. Just the thought of Edward biting a pillow during our love-making was funny.

"Why are you laughing?!" Edward demanded. "Don't you see?"

Edward let go of my arm and walked into the room. He walked through a pile of feathers, making them blow all over the room. He picked up a large piece of wood, and I realized it was part of the headboard that used to be on the back of the board.

"This could have been you!" Edward said.

He turned away from me and slammed the piece of headboard onto the floor.

"Do you realize now what I meant last night?" Edward asked, "I could have killed you, Bella. Do you think I want that?"

"Edward," I said.

"No, Bella," Edward said, "Listen --"

"No, you listen, Edward!" I demanded, "You are ruining this."

"Serves me right," Edward said, "Seeing how I ruined Esme's bed, why don't I just continue?"

"Edward, stop," I said.

I walked over to him and put my hand against his cheek.

"Listen to me," I said. "I. Am. Happy."

He sighed and turned his eyes away, as if he was ignoring me.

"Ugh!" I groaned. "I wish you could just read my mind. So you could truly know how I was feeling."

"That's a new one," Edward said, "You're usually happy that I can't read your mind."

"Not today," I said.

"Why?" Edward asked.

"Because of this!" I said, throwing my hands up in the air. "You being all depressed because you think you hurt me. I am happy. Well, okay, before you started all of this moaning, I was happy. Now... well, I'm sorta pissed actually."

"You should be angry at me," Edward said.

"Well, I am," I said, "Does that make you happy?"

"No," Edward said, "I don't think I could be happy right now."

"That is exactly why I am angry, Edward," I said, "You are killing my buzz."

He rolled his eyes.

I sighed, and I could suddenly feel some of the bruises.

"We knew there would be risks," I said, "I knew there would be risks. But this is what I meant last night. You can't always control yourself. Even if you took time, even if we did wait until the end of our honeymoon, the same could have happened. Either way, I am happy. Besides, this was nothing. I think it was amazing, since neither of us knew what to expect. With a little practice –"

"Expect?" Edward asked, "So did you know what to expect? Did you know that you'd have no broken bones after all of this?"

"I didn't know what to expect," I admitted, "I didn't expect how beautiful and perfect it was."

As we were talking, more and more of last night seemed to come to my mind. I was happy with each new memory, hoping none of this would go away when I became a vampire.

"Why?" I asked, "Did you expect any of it?"

"I had some knowledge," Edward admitted.

Suddenly, the sound of steam hissing was heard. Edward cursed and ran past me into the kitchen. I followed him into the kitchen. On the stove were bacon and eggs in two different frying pans. Edward turned off the stove quickly.

"I think I've burned it," Edward said.

"You... cooked breakfast for me?" I asked, sitting down at the table.

"I was set on making up for what I did to you," Edward said.

"Edward," I said, with a sigh, "You didn't have to."

Edward ignored me and dished the bacon and eggs onto a plate. He put the plate in front of me and sat across from me. I looked at my meal. The bacon looked pretty crispy, but I liked it that way. The eggs were slightly black but looked edible.

"How does it look?" Edward asked.

"Well," I said, biting into a piece of bacon, "At least I won't have to put up with your cooking for too long."

Edward laughed for the first time all morning.

"So," I said, "Before you rushed to the kitchen, you were talking about what you had expected from last night."

Edward sighed.

"I had some knowledge, yes," he said again.

"Oh, really?" I asked.

"I spoke to Carlisle after you and I had made our bargain," Edward said. "I was hoping he could help me. Of course he warned me that this could be very dangerous for me. But he had faith in me – faith I didn't deserve. Eat."

He must have noticed I was about to protest. I bit into the piece of bacon, not really caring about the food in front of me.

"I also asked him what I should expect," he continued when he knew I wouldn't interrupt. "I didn't know what it would be like for me... seeing that I'm a vampire. Carlisle told me it was a very powerful thing."

I nodded. It was definitely a powerful thing.

"He told me physical love was something I shouldn't treat lightly," he continued.

I snorted, almost choking on the mouthful of eggs I had started on.

"I also discussed it with my brothers," Edward said. "They told me it was a very great pleasure. Second only to drinking human blood."

I blushed.

"But I've tasted your blood," Edward said. "There's nothing more potent than that... I don't think they were wrong, really... just that it was something different for us. Something more."

"It was more," I insisted, "It was everything."

Edward scoffed.

"Why?" I asked, "Do you think I'm making this up?"

"Yes," Edward said, "If only to ease my guilt."

"You listen to me, Edward Cullen," I said, with a sigh. "I am not pretending anything for your sake, okay? I didn't even know there was a reason to make you feel better until you started being all miserable. I've never been so happy in all my life-- last night was even better than when I said 'I do' and realized that, somehow, I get to keep you forever. That is one of the happiest memories I've ever had, and this was better. So just deal with it."

He sighed. "I'm making you unhappy," he said, "I don't want to do that."

"Then don't you be unhappy," I said, "That's the only thing that is wrong here."

His eyes tightened, then he took a deep breath and nodded. "You're right. The past is past and I can't do anything to change it. There's no sense in letting my mood make you anymore unhappy. I'll do whatever I can to make you happy now."

I examined his face suspiciously, and he gave me a serene smile.

"Whatever makes me happy?" I asked.

Edward rolled his eyes.

"Eat," he said.

I couldn't. I wasn't hungry anymore. Well... for anything but Edward. I shook my head.

"I'm just going to take a shower," I said, then smirked. "Would you like to join me?"

"I'm just going to wash the dishes," Edward said.

I sighed.

"You aren't going to touch me again while we're here, are you?" I asked.

He grinned and walked over to me. He put his hand to my jaw, then kissed me deeply on my lips.

"You know that's not what I meant," I said, when I could breathe again.

He sighed and dropped his hands.

"I know," he said. "And you're right. I will not make love to you again until you've been changed. I will not hurt you again."

I frowned and headed for the bathroom. Well, at least he hadn't changed his mind about one thing. He was still supportive of the fact that I wanted to become like him. My only question now was.... when exactly would that happen?

Woo! Well, I wrote that chapter fast! I could just not stop writing! I loved this chapter! I know I had put a little more of the content from Breaking Dawn into this chapter. But I promise. Once we get away from Isle Esme, then everything will be in my own words. There is just some stuff that is too perfect for this.

I loved this chapter. So sensual. Hope you loved it! Feedback would be awesome!