~2 more weeks gone~

If before I felt alone. Well, now I feel alone now more than ever. Why, might you ask. Because last week, my mother died. She had a heart attack and didn't recover. I cried for a week but pulled myself together for Charlie. Charlie was lifeless just like me and Esme. Esme and Renee were best friends, so I knew it would be hard on her. As far as I knew, Edward, Alice, Rosalie, Emmett and Jasper didn't even know. That was what hurt me even more. I thought that since my mother had passed away, they would have at least called to see if I was ok, but no. Not one call, not one text.

EPOV

Life is great. I have the perfect girlfriend Tanya, and my family are the greatest. School is going great but lately I noticed Esme has been upset lately. I was shocked when I saw Bella in the garden with Esme 2 weeks ago, and even more shocked when I saw that her, Esme and Carlisle were hugging each other when I looked out the window. Me and Bella used ot be best friends, but now we're not even that anymore. I know I don't show it, but I do miss her. I miss talking to her. I know the others do to but our life is better now, and I don't mean that in a bad way, but it's true. I have a girlfriend, one that actually likes me for me, and not just because my family has money.

My thoughts were brought back to Esme, who was crying in the garden. What is wrong with her? Why is she crying so much?

"Mom, what's wrong?" I asked, walked outside,

She just cried harder.
"Mom" I said, shocked, what had I done?

Just then Carlisle came back from work since it was 7.30, and he immediately comforted Esme. He whispered something in her ear, and she nodded. He looked up and glared at me. WTF?

"Leave Edward, you're making things worse"

I walked back inside and my adoptive siblings questioned me. They were all shocked by what Carlisle said, but what can be done? Nothing.

"Maybe Bella will know, Edward invite her round" Alice said, handing me her phone.

"Hello, who is this?" Her voice asked through the phone. She deleted Alice' number. I wonder why.

"Edward"

"Oh..hello Edward" Was it just me or did her voice sound colder when she figured out who it was.

"Erm.. do you want to come round and hang out?" I asked, taking Alice' advice

"I'm not allowed, Charlie is out working"

"Well, put your mom on the phone and I'll ask her for you" I said. I heard her crying through the phone and she hung up.

"I mentioned her mom, she cried and hung up"

They all look confused so I just shook it off and went upstairs to ring Tanya.

BPOV

When Edward asked about my mom, I cried. I couldn't help it, it just confirmed what I had thought all along. That they didn't know about my mothers death. I can't do this anymore. I can't. Charlie barely notices me anymore. He just wakes up, eats, goes to work, eats, and sleeps, then does the same thing the next day. I tried talking to him but he didn't hear me. I don't blame him though. Him and my mom were in love. He was bound to be heartbroken. But couldn't he think of me. I had lost my mother, my best friend (and love) and people I thought of as my brothers and sisters. What have I to live for now? Because I really can't think of anything anymore. If you asked me that 2 months ago, I would've said my mom, my dad, my best friend, my group, but now I don't know. I doubt Charlie would notice I am gone, well he would, and it would hurt him, having lost his wife then his daughter, but I don't have anything left apart from a father that can barely hold himself together. I find myself repeatedly asking if anyone would miss me if I died? I doubt it. Carlisle and Esme yes, Edward and the others no. Charlie, not sure.

So why don't I? Commit Suicide like I have been thinking about since mom died. ... I'm going to do it. With that thought I got my phone and texted Carlisles phone and Esmes phone, the exact same message.

im sory i am doing this but they all hate me, and i dnt no y, they dnt even no my mther is dead, chrlie is depressd tht he doesnt ntice me anymor, so i can thnk of only 1 solution, suicide, i so sorry bout this bt i av 2. and 1 thing can u tell thm can thy evr find it in their hearts to forgive me 4 wtevr i av dne. your r the best ppl i av evr knwn, u r my 2nd set of parnts...i lve u.. and good bye..xxxxx

I hit send and ran up to my room. My phone rang a few minutes later and it was Esme begging me not too. I told her why and hung up. I needed to do this while Charlie was at work, so I wrote a quick note explaining what and why I am doing this and said that I will love him no matter what. I grabbed the rope I found in the back of my wardrobe and mad a noose. I hung it up from the cieling and made sure it could hold my weight.

For the next half an hour, I changed into clothes that I wanted to be buried in and stood on my bed. I fit my head through the noose and jumped. I could feel the life slowly draingin out of my body, with every second. Every minute. I could feel my eyelids getting heavier and heavier and let my eyes close. But the last thing I heard was voices screaming my name in front of me before I allowed the darkness to come over me.