"OH MY GOD!"
Just then an ugly ass bitch ugly black hair and druggy eyes walked onstage. She was wearing like the ugliest outfit ever because she was poor and ugly as a monkey's ass, and she looked like she came out of the wizard of Oz, like she was a half munchkin half-flying monkey uber loser geek tramp slut bitch ass ho.
It had to be Lacey Massley. Then a long haired guy (who looked hot, except because he was a Satanist goth), another Indian terrorist, and some other faggot walked up.
A girl who looked exactly like Jessica Simpson announced "The battle of the bands presents THE FLYING LEAFS!"
Everyone booed. They even threw a bottle of piss. The Indian guy, who probably thought it was a drink, well, because that's what they usually drink in India, chased after it. The flying leafs started playing a song called "I love dick" (thanks shellie for the idea). I got so mad that these Satanists were there that I clutched my crucifix and suddenly the microphone in which Lacey was singing grew into a snake and started strangling her.
"Who- the Fuck-IS-doing-tHIS?" she asked all satanically.
But it was too late because a giant pole pulled her offstage.
"Wow that band fucking sucks" said the announcer." Next, the only band that gives me a hard-on, SECRET LOVER!"
I blushed, because I'm really really shy and Gwin and I flew onstage (something only the good vampires can do) and picked up our instruments.
"ONE… 2… 3… GO!"
We started playing a song that I really like called "Halleluyah". Suddenly all the Satanists started smiling. A white light filled the place and their black clothes turned to white. Their make up fell and then I knew that with my power I had saved them.
"Well, it's official" said Aro, still looking at my boobs. " We are going to sacrifice Lacey!"
So they tied her up. Suddenly, she bursts into flames. She laughed maniacally and tore the floor open from the bottom.
"YOU CAN"T KILL ME YOU FUCKING LOSERS" she said "BECAUSE I'M THE EXORCIST!"
And then a bunch of smoke came out and she disappeared. IN the smoke.
"Wow…" Gwin said. Just then, Carlile, Bella, Edward, Rosalie, and Reneesmee broke through. Carlile and I frenched like donkeys on mating season. He pulled up my skirt and put his fingers in my lady cave. I groaned and took off my dress. He unbuckled his pants and put his huge veiny donkey sized thing (because donkeys have big things, I saw it on discovery channel NOT like I'm into bestiality you fags!) inside me. His eel liked to hide in my lady cave like Mameha says on Memories of a Geisha.
"OOOH yeah!" he said, then he twisted my nipples.
I twisted his pierced nipples back.
But then I looked around and saw that we hadn't noticed that the people in the audience were watching. Even the girls got horny. Then I noticed that we were naked so we run away.
"Wow Hayley," bella said. " We were outside hearing and you sound JUST like Hayley Williams except a whole lot better!"
"kiss-ass" I called her wisely.
"What's over there?" renee said, pointing at a red bright card that was enveloped in flames.
Carlile picked it up and said it looked like an address.
"It looks like an address," he said, and read it. "It says
666,
devil's highway,
Hawaii Hawaii."