Sorry this took longer than I expected. It turned out a little more angsty than I intended, and I started over so many times it wasn't even funny. Hopefully it was worth the extra time.

Cats and Dogs

A week had passed since Emily had been forced to confront Hotch, and the tension the encounter had caused among the members of the team was as vibrant as ever. Very few words had been spoken between Hotch and Emily. Emily remained more than pissed at JJ, Penelope, and Derek no matter how often nor how elaborately they attempted to apologize. Reid and Rossi, having had no part in the secret meeting of the previous Thursday, were clueless as to what exactly was causing the abounding temperamental issues within the unit.

Needless to say, the team was not having the most successful of weeks.

Unfortunately, success was the one thing the team was desperately in need of. They were working a case in the usually arid city of Phoenix, Arizona, and the weather had taken a turn for the wacky. The heavens had opened up and were dumping buckets all over the inconveniently outdoor crime scenes. The only service the abundance of water provided to the team was to wash away almost all the evidence available.

The unsub they were dealing with acted like a sexual sadist with a narcissistic personality. Based on victimology, however, they would seem to be dealing with a lack of self-confidence and a tendency to overcompensate. The two personalities were, obviously, mutually exclusive.

The lack of material evidence and conflicting possible profiles left the team with very little to work with. All they could do was hope that a previously unidentified witness had seen something and would come forward to miraculously provide them with a break-through to see into their killer's head.

The one thing they could all agree on was how likely that was, also known as not very.

And so the team was sitting around a table with Penelope on speakerphone, brainstorming for anything they might not have thought of. They hadn't come up with anything that made sense for their unsub except for Dissociative Identity Disorder, and the trace amounts of evidence they had showed a very organized signature.

Based on the team's experience, multiple personalities and organization simply didn't go together.

"Maybe we should talk to the victims' families again," Derek finally suggested. "There could be some small detail we're overlooking."

"You mean you don't think we've harassed these poor people enough?" Emily asked. "Between us and the police, they've been interviewed three times, and they just lost a loved one."

"You don't think I know that?" Derek demanded.

Emily opened her mouth for a no-doubt furious retort, but Penelope cut her off. "Princess we're just trying to find a solution to this mess, we're not trying to be insensitive."

"Yes, well, we all know how great of a solution-finder you are, Garcia," Emily quipped.

Reid's eyebrows pulled together and he probably would have launched into an explanation of how it wasn't really all of them because he didn't know, but JJ kicked him under the table and gave him a look that said, 'you really don't want to go there.'

"Prentiss is right," Hotch said, stopping the budding argument in its tracks. "We're not going to get anything more out of the families."

Derek sighed and leaned back in his chair. If the boss said no, then no it was. There was absolutely no point in arguing with Hotch.

The group didn't get a chance to think through any other options they might have, because someone tapped on the door to their little conference room and pushed it open. One of the deputies they'd been working with stepped inside and said, "A couple of kids just found another body."

The disheartening news affected everyone similarly. Emily and JJ closed their eyes, Hotch buried his face in his hands, and Derek slammed his fist down on the table in anger as he stood. Reid and Rossi exchanged morose glances. Everyone's face was a mask of desperation and disappointment.

It took Hotch a minute to compose himself enough to ask, "Do we have an ID on her?"

The deputy nodded. "Her name was painted on her chest, same as all the rest. It was Rachael Piaskowski. Her parents never even reported her missing."

"Alright," Hotch said, switching on his 'game face', as some of his team had come to call it. There was only a slight difference between the expressions, but they knew him well enough to recognize it. "I'll go talk to the family. JJ, Morgan, Reid, and Dave, follow the deputy to the crime scene. Prentiss, you're with me."

Every face in the room turned to stare at him in disbelief. He would never admit to his team that he'd slipped into old habits accidentally, so he couldn't change the order. The realization that he wanted more than anything to be able to do just that made him feel like a terrible coward.

He pushed past the deputy and out of the room, leaving everyone blinking after him. None of them had any idea what had just happened. It was times like that when they found it extremely difficult not to profile their teammates.

After a minute or so they realized that they were still just standing around and rushed out of the room in quick succession.

Emily and JJ were the last two out of the room, and before they joined the others, JJ reached out to touch Emily's shoulder. "Are you okay?" she asked, concerned.

"I'm fine," Emily snapped, shrugging her off. She shot a frown at JJ as she turned and stalked away.

"Em!" JJ called after her with a sigh. She truly regretted her part in the disaster that she had helped Derek and Penelope concoct. She had been sure Hotch returned Emily's feelings for him; all the signs had been there. Now she thought maybe she'd just been seeing what she'd wanted to be there for her friend's sake. She felt horrible for making the relationship between the two more volatile.

And now… what was Hotch thinking, pairing Emily with himself? It must have been a mistake, a slip of the tongue. It was the only thing JJ could think of to explain what otherwise would be nothing but simple idiocy.

"Are you okay?" Derek asked her quietly when she slid into the seat next to him. He had noticed the slight remorse in her eyes despite her attempts to hide it.

"Yeah," she whispered wearily. "I'm just worried about Em."

Derek nodded in understanding. "She'll be fine." He was more confident in himself when it came to his knowledge of the team. While he understood JJ's concern, he was personally maintaining the belief that Hotch wanted Emily just as much as she wanted him. Hotch habitually paired Emily with himself, which had been the first tip-off. It had gotten Derek's attention, and he'd started noticing the interactions and subtle sexual tension between them. He also knew enough about that kind of thing to know it wasn't one-sided.

Derek knew his boss, too. Hotch might not be willing to do anything about how he felt, but he wasn't the type to patronize Emily about it either. Hotch was more understanding, at the very least, than he liked them to believe.

He turned in his seat to watch Emily follow Hotch to the dark SUV he always drove as Rossi pulled out of the parking lot.

Emily felt dread course through her veins with every step she took. She ran a nervous hand through her hair as she jerked open the door to the van.

Hotch watched her as surreptitiously as he could as she gracelessly lifted herself into the seat beside him. He hoped maybe this return to old ways would be what they needed to start them back on their way to the friendship they'd had before. He missed the easy smiles she greeted him with in the morning and the opportunities to return them throughout the day. He'd smiled more since he met her than he had in all his years at the Bureau.

He winced when she turned and faced out the window. He could barely see her face through the thick dark hair that for once wasn't pulled back, but he could tell from what little he could see that it was a carefully arranged mask. Whatever she was truly feeling was bottled up and buried deep behind it, where no one, particularly him, could find nor offend it.

He allowed them to ride in silence for a while as he maneuvered the maze of city streets.

Emily felt Hotch's eyes drilling into her the whole way across the city. Even when he was focused on the road before him she knew he was chancing frequent peripheral glances in her direction. She also felt the void where camaraderie had once existed. It was like an obvious, gaping hole, and the silence made it worse.

She had always been the best at compartmentalizing, but now it was proving almost impossible as she fought back the surge of overwhelming pain and regret. She had been so concerned with wanting more than she had before that she hadn't seen the risk. She never thought reaching out for it would make her lose what she already had.

Right now she wanted nothing more than everything back the way it was before she made her stupid mistake.

Hotch took a deep breath and sighed. He couldn't be a coward any longer; anything was better than the emptiness she'd left him with the week before.

"Emily?" he said quietly. Her head came up slightly and she blinked in surprise. If anything she hadn't expected the use of her first name. She hesitated, uncertain of how well she could control herself now that she had laid out her feelings for him to see and knew he didn't return them.

"Em?" he murmured.

Emily turned in shock to stare at him with eyes more vulnerable than he'd ever seen her.

He gritted his teeth to say the two words he'd thought he would never say to another woman. "I'm sorry." As simple as they were, they brought back memories he'd banished to the farthest corners of his mind. It was disturbing, how easily retrievable they were.

She morosely shook her head. "Don't apologize. None of it is your fault. I overstepped my bounds; I never should have gone against the rules."

Rules. The word sent a realization flying at Hotch like a brick wall. He internally cursed himself and bad timing, but followed his gut and pulled the van off onto the shoulder. If he didn't tell her what had just occurred to him right then, he would never again find the courage to do it. He knew it might still be too late.

"I'm apologizing because it's not about the rules," he told her. "It's never been about the rules. I've just been hiding behind them because they're convenient."

Emily continued to stare at him. She didn't know where he was going, and she wasn't sure it was something she wanted to hear.

"After losing Haley twice I can't bear the thought of losing someone else. No matter what I do, that pain haunts me. I don't know if I could survive that again. That's why I compartmentalize; I have to keep my personal life separate from my work, or else everything I work for is put at risk. I put myself in the line of fire every day, but the thought that the things and people I love can't be protected from it destroys me every time it crosses my mind.

"But the two are inherently linked. I know, no matter how much I try to deny it, that I am the link. So I distance myself from everything and cut off my emotions to stop the pain. My job is to serve and protect the country I love, and I have failed nowhere more than among those people I love most."

It touched Emily to no end that Hotch was spilling his heart out to her. Something she'd said had triggered this, and it meant everything to her that he chose to reveal this to her. "But what does this have to do with –"

"I do care about you, Emily. I always have, but I was convinced that it was better for both of us if I kept my distance. I saw the signs, I knew how you felt, but I fooled myself into thinking it would never work. I used any excuse I could find to shield myself from the mere potential of more pain."

He cupped her cheeks between his hands and whispered, "I compartmentalize because it's easier than admitting the connections that endanger my world. Caring about you crossed every boundary I'd ever built myself. I didn't know what to do."

Emily rejoiced at his use of the word 'didn't'. It meant that he did know what to do now; he was finally voicing an emotion that he had apparently been hiding from her as long as she'd hidden the same thing from him.

And then he kissed her, and they both knew that while they still had a lot to work out, everything was going to be okay.

Even if the prospect did sound like a horrible cliché paired with a crappy chick flick.

Author's Note:

And the beginning is complete! Actually, from here on out it's going to be marked as complete because it's basically going to be a series of drabbles. I'll update whenever I can. If you have any particular scenes you want to see, just send the idea my way and I'll see what I can do. I will say now, however, that I don't do smut or anything that comes close to it. Notice the story's rating, thank you. This is all just for your amusement and my own.

Peace out for now,

Snoball13