Disclaimer- See chapter one
A/N: Come on you guys, I could use a little feedback. Tell me what you liked, what you don't like, where I could improve, ect. I want to make this a story that you love to read.
"What exactly would you have liked me to do about it, Edward? My father invited him over. Y'know, Charlie? He owns the house, yeah?" I fumed, trying to keep quiet. We were in his bedroom with the door shut, but in a house full of vampires that didn't mean squat. Everyone could hear me as clearly as though I was shouting. My human pride demanded I at least try, however.
"You didn't have to talk to him, Bella," Edward said, furiously. He was completely unruffled during this argument, something that always drove me crazy. No matter what he did, a hair never seemed to come out of place. It was ridiculous, really.
"So I should have gone upstairs, and hid? Until he left? I mean, really. Like that would have done anything if he'd phased. I don't know if it's escaped your notice, but he's gigantic!" I hissed.
"Exactly. He's dangerous, Bella."
"So are you, ya gonna kick me outta here? Maybe find me a safe rock to hide under?" I asked, getting a little hysterical. "Next time I come over, is everything going to be covered in childproof locks, hmm? Maybe you'll rap me in bubble rap every time before I'm aloud to leave the house?"
"Bella, you are being hysterical. Not to mention, rude," Edward said, looking genuinely hurt.
I sighed. "I'm sorry, but you're not being realistic, either. There was nothing I could do about it so I made the best of it. Whether you like it or not, Jake is my friend. And currently, he is my only friend. I know you're concerned for my safety, well aware of it," I snorted. These past months were very real proof. "But you don't get to make choices for me, Edward. This is my life, and I'm going to live it. No one else. I respectfully ask that you let me make my own decisions, and express any concerns or requests for me in that way. I don't have to do anything, after all."
"Bella. I love you. I almost lost you once. I'm just... I'm trying. I'll try harder," He promised. My resolve softened, and he pulled me into his arms gently.
I sighed, and tipped my head up to his, and our lips touched, softly. His cool lips worked against mine, slowly but surely. The kiss was careful, but far from chaste. A happy medium that I was glad Edward had discovered. When his lips finally released mine, I rested my forehead against his chin for a few moments, just breathing. "That was wonderful," I whispered.
I could feel his smile. "Kissing you always is, love."
"Edward?" I asked, softly.
"Yes, love?"
"You know I love you more than anything, right?"
"Of course. I love you the same. Is everything alright?" He asked, concerned.
I paused for a moment. "Yeah, it's fine. I've just been feeling out of sorts lately. A little restless. It'll pass," I assured him.
"If you're sure. You know you can talk to me about anything, Bella. Anything. I can promise you there's nothing you can say that we couldn't deal with."
I can think of one thing.
Shut up, I thought to myself.
Days passed, and by the end of two weeks, I was right. Life settled back into it's own pattern, and the guilt that used to grip me every other moment was fewer and farther between. I stopped avoiding Jasper so much, and every moment I wasn't with Edward I was with Alice, and rarely, Jacob.
That's when it caught me by surprise when Edward left me alone one day to go hunting with the rest of the family. I sat on the couch of the large empty house, flicking through the 900+ channels they had, looking for something to entertain me while I awaited their return. I paused on Lifetime. They were airing Speak again. It had been a good movie. A better book, yes, but a good movie. Just as I was about to get up and raid the fridge, I heard the front door click open.
I stood quickly. "Hello?" I called out, nervously.
Carlisle poked his head in the living room and smiled. "Hello, Bella."
I breathed a sigh of relief. Really, Bell. Who did you think it would be, strolling casually through the front door. The Volturi? Jesus, get a grip. "Carlisle. I didn't expect you. I thought everyone was hunting."
He hung his jacket on the coat hook. "Everyone but me. I had to work a little late today. I'll go some other time." I rolled my head from side to side, stretching my neck. "Sore?" He inquired, a small smile playing on his lips.
"Uh, yeah. I think I slept on it funny," I explained. In a flash he was behind me, easing me back into a chair.
"Let me help you," he said softly. His skilled hands deftly flew over the strained muscles in my neck, eliciting a soft moan from my lip. I flushed, in embarrassment mingling with pleasure, as his expert fingers worked out the kinks in my neck and shoulders. It was hard to let go of the tension when it was so awkward, letting him touch my in such an intimate way again. I briefly wondered if Carlisle felt strange as well, before I decided not. He had been acting as though nothing had happened so easily I was sure that he wasn't bothered in the least.
"Yesss," I hissed, the sound escaping from within me of it's own volition. He hit a particularly sensitive spot and I just couldn't help myself. "Oh, Carlisle." My skin tingled underneath his smooth fingertips. I felt as though I would die of embarrassment at any moment. This was Carlisle. Couldn't I at least pretend I didn't still desire him? But here my body was, betraying me so easily.
"Yes, Bella?" He asked, teasing in his tone.
Oh, God. I couldn't be doing this. Not again. "Please," I pleaded. Traitor.
"Say it, my Bella."
No, I wouldn't. Saying it... That made this real. "Carlisle, please."
"Please what, my Bella?"
"Fuck me," I said, spitting it out. The words were filthy and they send a thrill though me.
"Nicely, my Bella."
"Please fuck me, Carlisle," I begged. Oh, I was surely going to hell.
He smiled, bringing me to the couch before his lips captured mine. His tongue stroked against mine, fiercely, and his hands worked underneath my shirt, groping my breasts, and manipulating my nipple skillfully. I moaned underneath him, as wetness pooled between my thighs. He growled, grinding his hardness into me. I loved this about Carlisle. He was so... animalistic when turned on.
I fumbled with his belt, then jerked down the zipper on his pants before reaching inside and grasping him. He moaned at the contact, breaking the kiss again. "Shit, Bella. Your hands are so hot. It's like nothing I've ever felt before." Encourage, I stroked him roughly, and he groaned.
Abusing his supernatural speed once again, he quickly yanked down my jeans and underwear, burying himself inside me. He didn't give me a moment's reprieve before thrusting hard and fast, spurred on by my cries of pleasure.
"Oh, fuck, oh yes. That's it, right there," I cried out. I was so caught up in the sensations of his thrusting I had no room for shame, writhing against him desperately as the pleasure built. "Uh, Carlisle! Please, please, I can't take it. I'm so close," I whimpered.
All of a sudden, Carlisle stilled and I looked at up him in confusion. "What's wrong?" I asked. "Why are you stopping?"
"Bella, wake up," Carlisle said, his voice sounding distorted. His eyes seemed glassy, far away.
I stared at him confused, before I felt myself being shaken roughly, and realized something wasn't quite... right. "Bella, wake up!" The voice repeated. The world around me flickered before turned to smoke, and falling away, and I woke up with a start, coming face to face with Jasper.
I stared up at him, bleary eyed. "Huh?" A dream. It was all a dream. Of course.
"What ever were you dreamin' about, darlin?" He drawled. That voice of his made me grin every time, just like now, through my sleepiness. Coated in honey and pure southern twang Alice had once compared it to an auditory orgasm, and I had blushed and giggled madly. Sometimes I almost forgot she was a vampire, and not all teenaged girl. I just thought it was sweet. It made it easy to see past the scarier parts of Jasper.
I looked up at the TV, the credits for Speak rolling. I must have slept through it. "Nothing," I said quickly. And then suspiciously, "Why?"
If he hadn't been a vampire I think Jasper might have blushed then, southern gentleman that he was. "You seemed... agitated. You were thrashin' and moanin'."
"Oh." I pulled myself up into a sitting position on the couch. "Where is everyone?" I asked him, curiously. I looked up, expectantly, only to find us alone.
"We decided to race back. I won," He said grinning.
Just then the door burst open. "Jasper Whitlock, you cheater!" He yelled.
"I won fair and square," Jasper insisted, smirking.
"You made us all lethargic, how is that fair?" He said, indignantly.
Alice danced and twirled in behind him. "Like it's fair when you pick the moves right out of his head when playing chess?" She asked innocently, bending down to hug me on the couch.
"Right, like you don't do 'see' our moves when we play poker," Rosalie muttered under her breath, dropping down on the couch beside me.
"We get it, we get, you guys. You're a right pack of little cheaters," Esme said, settling down in the center seat on the sofa, while Emmett and Carlisle both finished putting away all of the things and shutting the front door behind them. I stared at Carlisle, who was fervently avoiding my gaze, for a moment too long before I looked away, fighting a blush with all my might.
"How were you, Bella? Not too bored, I hope?" Edward asked. He sat on the arm of the sofa, his arm wrapped around my shoulder, as he pressed a kiss to the top of my head. I shook my head, trying to clear the sleep and confusion from my head. When I looked up again, Carlisle had left the room, and relief washed over me.
"She was asleep when I came in," Jasper piped up.
"Uh, yeah, I passed out almost as soon as I got here," I admitted. "I can't believe I fell asleep."
"Well, at least you weren't lonely," Edward said, and for a moment I was gripped with fear before my logical mind took over. Because I was sleeping, of course.
"You must be famished," Esme said. "Do you want me to make you anything, sweetheart?" She asked. I looked up into those warm honey eyes of hers, filled with nothing but love and swallowed back a familiar wave of guilt.
"Uh, no. It's fine. I can make myself something, really," I told her. I didn't need the poor woman doing anything for me. I think I owed her enough.
"Oh, honey, it's no bother. I'll go in there and whip something up for you right away. You just stay right there," She told me, and left for the kitchen.
Emmett swooped right in and stole the empty seat, throwing one arm around Rosalie and the other around me. "So, Bell. Halo?" He inquired.
"No. Not again. You wipe the floor with me every time," I protested.
He grinned. "I know. That's why I like it." Before I knew what was happening, a controller was in my and and I was fighting for my life in deep space.
By the time Esme returned with a bowl of chicken tortilla soup, I had chucked the controller down in defeat. "No, Emmett. I'm done! I've died six times now. You do it, Alice. Seeing the future, you might be evenly matched," I said sarcastically.
I took the bowl from Esme gratefully, and took in the first mouthful, moaning in ecstasy. "How can someone who doesn't eat make sure delicious food?" I asked. "It's unfair."
She smiled warmly. "I'm glad you enjoy it. I relish in the opportunity to actually use our kitchens. Mostly they just stay empty."
After I finished eating "the kids" as Esme called us, stayed downstairs talking and playing games, until a yawn escaped, unbidden, and Edward insisted on taking me home. I tried to protest, only to yawn again, furthering Edward's cause.
When Edward dropped me off at my house, I knew he wouldn't come back that night, given how tired I was. And that was good, because as soon as my head hit the pillow, I was plunged back into dreams of Carlisle.
"I've been waiting for you, my Bella," he whispered. I looked up to see him, sitting in his office chair, faced towards the large windows lining the room. "Where did you go?"
"Nowhere important. I'm sorry I kept you waiting," I whispered. I felt shock as I realized that though the words left my lips, though they were in my voice, I had no control over them. Nor did my I have any over my body, as it carried me toward him, where I straddled him in his chair.
"I've missed you, my love," he whispered, leaning in towards my neck. He inhaled deeply, sighing. "You smell delectable." He kissed there, his mouth and tongue doing delicious things to my skin. "You taste it, too."
Against my will, I felt my body fill with heat, seeing to center and liquify between my thighs. "Oh, Carlisle..." His name was drawn out in a hiss, and I had no doubt that had I been under my own control, I wouldn't have been able to stop myself from saying them either. I reached down and captured his lips with mine. He tasted of dark chocolate and spice, and I couldn't stop myself from burning for more.
His hands worked underneath the skirt that I hadn't realized I was wearing, and stroked my dripping slit through my underwear. "Still ready for me, I see," he said, chuckling. The sound of his laugh was deep and rich, and only served to intensify the burn I felt for him. His fingers slid underneath the band and he plunged two of them deep within me, making me cry out. "That's my Bella. Cry out for me, my sweet. My name," he said.
He thrust again, and he need not ask twice. "Carlisle! Please!"
"Please what, my Bella?"
"Don't deny me," I begged.
"Never, my Bella. I will never deny you," he promised.
A wave of warmth rushed over me, and as I looked into his eyes, the lust rose again...
... Only to be interrupted by the screeching of my alarm clock. Two weeks carried on this way, and my frustration increased steadily. The dreams always felt so real, and I always woke feeling as though I'd gotten much less sleep than I had. I was irritable during my waking hours, and struggled with guilt. It was always so hard to tell if the dreams were real or not, and it mattered not if I gave in to Carlisle. This other Bella always carried on just the same, and I could never stop the excitement I felt. But no matter what, I always woke up before we finished.
And then there was the real Carlisle. There wasn't any hint in his demeanor that he had been struggling the way I had, and I couldn't help but be a little angered by that. Had our encounter not affected him at all? Here I was, barely hanging on by a thread.
I think I hid it marginally well from everyone else, but there was always one person who could see right through my bullshit.
"Bella, you can't fool me," Jake said one day when we were sitting at his kitchen table. Charlie and Billy were down at Sue Clearwater's, helping her with the dinner she was going to bring over later. Jake and I were alone in the house. "You're always distracted lately, and your fuse is shorter than usual. You blow your top over the stupidest things, and you are always tired. What's wrong?"
"I haven't been sleeping well," I admitted. "I keep having these really... vivid dreams."
"Like what?" He asked, intrigued. I felt my cheeks burn and I knew without looking that they had to be the color of tomatoes. I couldn't tell Jake of all people about this. "Bella! Have you been having naughty dreams?" Jake teased, his eyes sparkling.
I whacked him in the shoulder, and he rubbed it, pretending to look pained. "Faker. I bet you hardly even felt it. Seriously. We are not discussing this," I said. "That's final."
"They hell it is. So you're dreaming about Fagward, and what?"
I felt the laughter rise within me and I tried to hold it back, but it spilled from me. "What? What did you just call him?" I asked, grinning.
"Fagward. So you're dreaming about the two of you doing the nasty. What's the problem?" He asked.
"Jake!" I hissed. "I told you I'm not talking about this."
He looked at me seriously. "Bells, you have to talk to someone about it. It's tearing you up. You obviously can't talk to the bloodsucker about it, so that leaves you with me. It's not my fault you have no other friends. I mean, really, you aught to branch out a little. Maybe add on of every species, ya know," He joked.
"Fine, but promise me you won't tell anyone. I'm serious. No one. And whatever you do, don't even think about it in Edward's presence," I warned.
"Alright, alright. Why are you so desperate that he not know? It's just a dream, Bells," He said.
I looked at the worn cabinet of his kitchen, my eyes trailing over the peeling linoleum counter tops. Basically anywhere but Jacobs face. "The dreams aren'tabouthim," I said quickly.
"What?" He asked, a confused smile playing over his lips.
"I said... The dreams aren't about him..." My face burned with shame, and I turned to face him. A grin spread slowly across his face, before Jacob burst out into laughter.
"Bella, this is the best news I've heard all week!" He cried. "I always knew you lusted after my hot bod," He said with a wicked smile.
I smacked his arm again. "Shut up, Jacob Black. They're not about you either, so can it."
He looked mildly disappointed, but we both knew he hadn't even entertained that idea. "Who is it? Tell me it's not that Newton jerk. He's an idiot. And a creep."
"See, that's the really embarrassing part," I said, slowly. His eyes met mine and he sighed.
"I won't like this, will I?" He asked.
"Probably not," I admitted. "They're about Carlisle."
He looked confused for a moment, before his eyebrows shot up. "No way!" He shouted, jumping out of his seat.
I put my hand on his shoulder, forcing him back down. "Keep it quiet, would ya? I don't want the whole damn rez knowing, all right?"
"You've been lusting after Dr. Fang? Really? Oh, this is too good to be true," He said, laughing. I glared at him. "No, really, Bell. This is the best laugh I've had in weeks, I really owe it to you."
"Jacob, get serious. I can barely function like this. You've gotta help me," I begged.
"Fine, tell me how the dreams usually go. And no icky details, I'm scarred enough," he said.
I told him the basic gist of the dreams, glazing over the intimate details, and once I was done, Jake was silent. He looked to be thinking for a few moments, and looking into this eyes I could almost see the gears turning in his brain. Then he stopped, and looked up at me, seemingly having come to a decision. "Well, Bella, there's only one thing you can do in this situation," he said.
"What?" I asked, eagerly. "I'll do anything to make this stop."
"You have to give in." My heart skipped a beat, and then he continued. "You just have to let the dream run it's course, I think. That's why it keeps coming back, because you're fighting against it. You're psyche needs to work through whatever it is that you're dealing with."
Well, what do you all think about Jake's suggestion? And you know what this means, right? Very soon there will be another complete lemon. None of this teasing stuff. And remember. Reviews are like naked, willing Cullen boys. Everyone wants one.