Hey everyone! Thank you all so much for the reviews and adds! I'm glad you guys liked the last chapter and I hope you like this one just as much. The next chapter will have more action, I swear. Thanks for reading and please let me know what you think!
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Disclaimer: I own nothing associated with the Twilight series.
Chapter 21
The nurse sent me home with little coaxing, apparently I looked worse than I thought I did. Trevor promised he'd get my homework for me and that he'd tell Anna to do the same since I shared my classes with both of them. I pulled out of the school parking lot and started driving. Trevor had ignited a fire in me to go and knock some sense into Paul, but the further I got away from the school the more the fire dimmed. I wasn't sure if I could go through with it. What if Trevor had been wrong and I had been right? What if Paul really didn't want to be with me anymore? Wouldn't I just be making a fool out of myself?
Sighing, I quickly pulled my truck over and put it in park as I took several deep breaths to try and calm my sudden nerves. I was a quarter of the way to La Push and the road was deserted. The only sounds around me were my heavy breathing and the sporadic chirping of the birds hidden in the trees of the forests that bordered the road. I closed my eyes as I leaned forward and rested my forehead on my hands as I gripped the steering wheel tightly. My heart was screaming at me to start the truck back up, drive, and go to him because it knew Trevor was right; while my head was telling me to turn the truck around, go home, and forget I had ever met him. I didn't know what to do, but I had to do something and if I did the latter, I knew I would end up regretting it because I loved him and he changed me for the better.
"Get a grip, Harper," I said as I lifted my head from my hands and started up the truck once more. "You can do this," I said as I pulled out onto the road and continued on to Paul's house. "He's worth fighting for isn't he?" I asked myself but I already knew the answer. He was.
When I pulled up in front of Paul's house, his truck was parked outside but that didn't mean he was home. Jared sometimes picked him up to go to a job site or he'd phase to head over to Sam and Emily's since it wasn't that far of a run for him in his wolf form. I climbed out of my truck and headed towards the house. I found myself mentally chastising myself for not dressing a little nicer that morning as I walked up the steps and stood on the porch. I swallowed the nervous lump in my throat, raised my hand to the door, and knocked. I waited a few seconds before I knocked again, but I still didn't get an answer. I tried to turn the doorknob out of curiosity and was surprised to find it unlocked. I opened the door slowly and went inside only to gasp at the sight in front of me.
Everything in Paul's house was thrown about the living room. It looked like it had been ransacked with the furniture tossed around and resting at odd angles in the room. The book case he had filled with a few books and DVDs was tipped on its side and the contents spilled on the floor. Nothing looked like it was missing though; everything was just tossed about the room. I quietly closed the door behind me and carefully maneuvered my way through the living room. I peeked into the small kitchen but found it in a similar state with broken dishes and glasses on the floor of the tiny room. I sighed and shook my head as I turned around and went over to Paul's bedroom door that was closed. I took a deep breath and opened the door to find his room was just as messy as the living room, however, it was occupied.
Paul's large form was laid out on the bare mattress. His right arm was bent and tucked close to his body while his left laid stretched out at his side and he was lying flat on his stomach. He was dressed in his trademarked cut offs and by the looks of the bottom of his feet he hadn't bathed lately. I walked into the room and over the discarded bed linens and clothes he had thrown about the room. I walked over to the right side of the bed and carefully sat down on the edge of the bed before I reached out and gently ran my fingers along the side of his face before I slid my fingers through his hair.
"Paul, wake up," I said softly and he took a deep breath through his nose before he lazily opened his eyes. He wasn't all the way awake yet, I could tell by the dazed look on his face but before I could say anything else I found myself lying on the bed next to him with his right arm wrapped around me tightly while his nose buried itself in my neck. His body practically covered mine and effectively pinned me to the bed. At first I was too shocked to move and confused as to how I had ended up in that position in the first place because I hadn't even registered his movements until I was lying under him. "Paul," I said as I gently pushed on his shoulder with my free left hand but he just held me tighter to him and it wasn't until I heard the soft snores escaping his lips and felt his deep breaths against my neck that I realized he had fallen back asleep.
I sighed quietly before I chuckled at the ridiculousness of the situation, but instead of trying to force him awake I just settled my left hand on his waist above his jeans and relaxed into the heat his body provided. He smelled a bit gamey, but at that moment I didn't care. I closed my eyes for a second to enjoy the feeling of just being held by him again, however, my body had other ideas and I found myself drifting off to sleep.
"Jeez!" a deep voice shouted and I let out a scream as I found myself bouncing off the bed and falling on to the floor, hitting my head on something as I landed. I rubbed the side of my head as I sat up and looked up at Paul who was still on the bed but sitting on his knees as he looked at me with confusion clear on his face.
"Hi," I said while I lowered my hand and got to my feet.
"What are you doing here?" he asked.
"I came to see you," I said as I adjusted my sweatshirt and rubbed at my head again since it was still stinging. "I tried to wake you up, but you just pulled me onto the bed and tucked me under you. I tried to wake you up again, but I gave up when you started snoring." He nodded before he frowned as he glanced at my hand.
"Did you hit your head?" he asked and I nodded as he quickly climbed from bed and stood right in front of me. He grabbed my hand and pulled it away from my head before he gently touched the sore spot on my head above my left ear. "Does it hurt?" he asked as his eyes were focused on his fingers in my hair but I couldn't answer him. I could only look up at his face. He looked as awful as I felt and despite just waking up he looked like he hadn't slept in awhile. When I didn't answer him after a few seconds, his eyes moved from his fingers that still gently moved against my head to my eyes. We locked eyes for a minute before he lowered his hand and took half a step back from me.
"Don't," I said as I reached out to him and grabbed him by the waist, my fingers digging into his heated skin. "You are so stupid to think that breaking things off with me was going to benefit anyone, and I was stupid to walk away and just let you do it. I don't care what anyone says about me or what Jason thinks. I don't care about anything other than you and I'm putting a stop to this. I won't let you hurt not only yourself but me too. It's been two days and I feel like I want to die and looking at the state of your house, I don't think you handled the last two days very well either."
"Harper," he breathed, sounding as if he was in pain, "I didn't mean to hurt you, and it wasn't my intention to break up with you. I just wanted to take a break so that Jason wouldn't fight you about seeing me."
"You did hurt me, Paul," I said the tears once again making their way to my eyes.
"I'm sorry," he said.
"When you said you wanted to take a break, I thought that you decided to ignore the imprint," I said. "That dealing with all the crap that comes with me had finally taken its toll."
"I know you did," he said, "but that wasn't true and I let you believe it anyway because I knew that would push you away." I sighed as moved my hands from his waist and up to his face before I pulled his lips down to mine. I poured everything I was feeling into that kiss, and he hesitated for only a second before his hands were on my hips. He pulled my body tight to his as my arms went around his shoulders and my hands found their way into his short hair as our lips battled. The kiss didn't last long but it was a powerful one and it left me breathless as I pulled my lips from his.
"I'm not going to live my life without you in it," I said as I opened my eyes and he opened his. "You said that to me, remember?"
"I remember," he whispered as his right hand left my hip and moved to cup my face.
"Well, I'm not going to live my life without you in it, Paul," I said as I played with his hair. "When you told me you wanted to break up with me, I felt like everything around me was crumbling. I was going backwards and the nightmares . . ." I trailed off and his eyes darkened. "They were a little intense." Unlike before, my nightmares weren't of my past. They were nightmares of Paul telling me how worthless and pathetic I was while his arm was draped around Clarissa. In reality, I knew that they were just my subconscious bringing up all my fears and that Paul wouldn't even touch Clarissa with a ten foot pole, but they had been so real and the ache that had settled in my chest because of them was painful. "I went to school this morning feeling like the world was against me until Trevor knocked some sense into me. He told me the guy doesn't always have to fight for the girl and I'm going to fight you all the way because I'm not letting you push me away anymore."
"I'm not going to fight you, Harper," he said as he lowered his hand from my face and moved it back to rest on my waist. "I was wrong and I probably didn't help my case any with Jason."
"Paul, I've told you that I don't care what he thinks," I said. "Jason's my brother and he'll love me no matter what in the end. Sure, he probably won't be very happy for a while, but he'll get over it. I love you so much Paul, and no one is ever going to change that. Not even you."
"I'll never try to do it again," he promised and I smiled at him. "I love you too," he breathed before his lips were back on mine. He kissed me with such a force that I lost my footing and ended up falling against him, which caused him to fall back onto the bed with me crashing on top of him and straddle him in the process. Our laughter broke our kiss and when it quieted, Paul returned his hand to my face as he sighed. "Sam told me Jason quit." It was a weird subject change, but I let him change it.
"Yeah," I said from my position on top of him, "and he broke up with Clarissa."
"Really?" he asked and I nodded as I rested my hands against his bare chest and remained lying against him. His chest felt like hot stone covered by soft velvet and I had to fight the urge to place a kiss against his skin. "Harper, I really am sorry."
"I know, and you've got a lot of making up to do," I said and he raised an eyebrow as a smirk made its way across his lips while his hands slid down my backside to rest on the back of my thighs. I could feel his body heat seeping through the cotton fabric of my clothes and my stomach tightened into many knots as I watched him lick his lips.
"What do I have to do?" he asked and my face heated as I bit my lower lip to hold back my smile. His fingers dug a little further into my flesh and I managed to stifle the gasp that had threatened to escape.
"First . . ." I trailed off seductively as I started to lean into him and slid my hands up his chest. However, when my lips were a breath away from his I stopped. "I want you to clean up this mess you've made," I said before I pushed myself off of him and stood from the bed. He frowned as he raised himself up on his elbows and looked at me.
"What?" he asked and I laughed as I put my hands on my hips.
"Your place is completely trashed, Paul," I said. "Why did you do this?"
"I was angry at myself," he said. "I let you think that you weren't important when you're the most important person in my life." Those words right there had my heart begging me to forgive him completely, but as much as I loved him he had still hurt me and I wasn't going to forgive him completely yet. I felt I had the right to hold out just a little bit longer.
"We're going to try and put Saturday behind us," I aid and he nodded as he smiled at me. "Now, you need to clean this mess up and I need to go home. The nurse has probably already called Jason and told him I was on my way home and that was almost two hours ago," I said after I glanced at the clock on the wall.
"I was wondering why you weren't in school," Paul said after he sighed quietly and climbed from the bed.
"I was a bit of a mess this morning and Trevor brought me to the nurse when I started to have a small breakdown," I said and he sighed again before he raised his hands to my face. He pulled me into a kiss and I rested my hands against his chest as he softly kissed me.
"Leave your window cracked tonight when you go to bed," he whispered against my lips.
"Why?" I asked and he kissed me again.
"Please just do it," he said and I nodded as he pressed his lips to mine once more. "You should go home."
"Yeah," I said softly before I slipped from his arms and stepped back to look up at him. "Love you." He closed his eyes and took a deep breath before he opened his eyes and smiled at me.
"Love you," he said in return. With one last look at him, I left the bedroom and then maneuvered my way through the scattered furniture in the living room. It had started raining again and I sighed as I pulled the hood of Jason's sweatshirt up over my head and ran to my truck. Jason was probably going to give me the third degree about not being in school, but my fatigue was catching up with me. Now that I had things sort of back on track with Paul, all I wanted to do was sleep.
Thankfully, when I arrived home Jason's truck was gone. He had mentioned something about going down to the plant and seeing if they had any openings, so, I figured he was still there. I went into the house and locked the door behind me. The house was quiet as tossed my backpack on the floor by the door and I made my way into my bedroom. I pulled Jason's sweatshirt from my body leaving me in the white tank top I had worn underneath and draped it over the back of my desk chair while I pushed off my tennis shoes and then climbed into bed. I was just starting to drift off to sleep when I heard a loud bang come from the living room of the small house. I sat up, my heart racing as I held my breath and listened carefully as heavy footfalls echoed through the house towards my open bedroom door. I started to reach for my cell phone on the nightstand only to freeze and let out a sigh of relief when Jason stepped in front of the door.
"Are you trying to kill me by slamming around like that?" I asked as I collapsed back against my pillows and ran my shaking hands over my face. "I thought someone had broken in."
"Sorry," he said before he shrugged off his raincoat and sat it down in the hallway before he walked into my room and sat down on the edge of the bed. "Nurse Carter called me and left me a message that she sent you home. She said you were pale and had a slight fever." He reached out and pressed the back of his hand to my forehead and then my left cheek. "You're not warm now."
"I'm feeling a little better," I said. "When I got home I went straight to bed and fell asleep." Technically I wasn't lying since when I got to Paul's I did end up in bed and I did fall asleep for a while. He sighed as he looked at me with a furrowed brow and nodded his head.
"You're not getting sick from Saturday when you got caught in the rain are you?" he asked and I shook my head.
"No, I just haven't slept well and I haven't eaten in a while," I said and he sighed quietly.
"All right, I'm going to fix you some soup and I expect you to each it," he said as he stood and I smiled at him.
"If you could make that soup tomato and add a grilled cheese with it, I promise to eat every bite," I said and he chuckled before he leaned down and pressed a kiss to my forehead.
"You got it," he said. When he left the room, I let out a sigh of relief that he hadn't been home when the nurse called. It didn't take him long to fix the food he promised and he had even brought it to me on a tray so I could eat in bed.
"Thanks," I said as I sat up against my headboard and he put the tray on my lap.
"You're welcome," he said. "So, how are you holding up?"
"Fine," I said as I cut the grilled cheese in half with the butter knife he had brought. "Better than yesterday," I added and he nodded as he sighed quietly. I felt bad for lying to him again, but I knew that if I told him that I had gone to Paul's and that the two of us were getting back together, he would not have been happy. "Jason," I said after I chewed and swallowed the bite of grilled cheese I had taken and he looked at me. "I think you should call Sam and tell him you want your job back."
"Why?" he asked with a frown.
"You went to the factory today didn't you?" I asked and he nodded. "Can you honestly tell me that you'd be happy working there?" He looked away from me. "Jason just because . . . just because I'm not seeing him anymore doesn't mean you can't work with him."
"Harp, it's not just that," he said. "Sometimes I feel like I'm out of the loop when I'm with them. I can't quite explain it."
"Talk to them," I said. "They're your friends Jason. They'll understand." He gave me a tight lipped smile before he patted my leg.
"Maybe you're right," he said before he stood. "Eat and get some rest. I'm going to go into town. I won't be gone long." I nodded as I continued to eat and he left the room. I hoped he would talk to Sam and set things right. It would only make both our lives easier in the long run.
When I finished eating I had taken a nap and woke up a few hours later feeling ages better than I had before. I climbed out of bed and carried the tray out into the kitchen. Jason wasn't home yet, so, I washed my dishes and tucked the tray back into the cupboard. I glanced at the clock and saw that it was after three. I had grabbed the phone from the counter to call Trevor and Anna to see if they would bring my homework, but before I could even dial there was a knock on the front door. I frowned and put the phone back down on the counter before I walked through the living room and to the front door. I opened the door and put a smile on my face when I saw Trevor and Anna standing on the porch.
"Hey, I was just about to call you guys," I said and Anna let go of Trevor's hand before she threw her arms around me.
"Trevor told me! Are you okay?" she asked as she pulled back and had her hands on my shoulders and looked at me closely. That was what I loved about Anna. Now that I had cracked that shell of hers, more and more of her true personality came out everyday.
"I'm okay," I told her as I pulled her hands off of me and ushered her and a smiling Trevor inside. "I went and talked to Paul," I said as I closed the door.
"And?" Trevor asked as he took Anna's hand again and I smiled at him. His smile widened and he nodded, satisfied that I was no longer a blubbering mess.
"Um, do you guys want to fill me in on what I'm missing?" she asked and I laughed as I pulled her away from Trevor and dragged her over to the sofa with Trevor following as he too laughed.
"We're working things out," I said and she gave me a small smile.
"Really?" she asked as she adjusted her glasses and I nodded.
"But when you guys talk to Jason, you can't mention it," I said. "I don't want Jason to know yet."
"Okay," Anna said and Trevor nodded.
"Thanks," I said before I let out a sigh. "So, what did I miss?" I asked and Anna was quick to pick up her backpack from the floor to pull out the detailed notes she had taken for me as well as the homework assignments I missed. As she started rattling off everything, I glanced at Trevor to see him smiling at Anna in a way that was oddly familiar. It wasn't the same smile he gave me or when he was horsing around with the guys. He was as far from Quileute as a guy could get, but yet the smile that was on his face was almost painfully similar to the smile Sam gave Emily, Jared gave to Kim, and Paul gave to me. Anna was Trevor's forever; there was little doubt in my mind about that.
Funny thing was that even though they were dating, I didn't think Anna really noticed the way Trevor looked at her; but one day soon she would and her life was never going to be the same. I knew mine hadn't been the same since the day I literally stumbled into my own forever.