Imagine me without You
0.05
The food couldn't escape its destiny when the fork came to attack. Naruto poked his food with the fork enough times for, well, kill it and make it even more not-eatable then before when he had received it from the cafeteria lady.
She is a very scary person by the way. and old.
Kiba wrinkled his nose and gave Naruto a disgusting look; the dog-boy pushed his own tray of food away from him.
"Thanks for ruining my appetite, friend." Kiba said with sarcasm.
"Don't worry, just doing my job." His friend raised an eyebrow at him in question. "Because you've gained weight lately?" The blonde boy smiled and the other rolled his eyes while giving a fake laugh.
Naruto pushed his own food away from him. He put his head on the table, with his arms there for support and comfort while his hood kept his head warm. He felt so worn out, but with a few reason…
"What's with you these days? Ever since new year's a couple of weeks ago you have been acting like a big, stupid…" Kiba nibbled on his lower lip, trying to find the right word to say.
"Charming prince sent form above?" Naruto offered.
"More like a dragon eating babies, but thanks anyway." Kiba sighed and started to play with his fork.
"… Is it because of Sakura?" He asked after a few seconds.
Naruto growled and shook his head. "Like I said before, NO, it's not about her! Let's just drop the subject already…"
Kiba used his fork-free hand and slapped Naruto's hood away so that the blonde's hair could be seen. Naruto gave his friend a disapproval look, which could be describes as pouting.
"You can talk to me! Seriously, you look like a kicked dog and a girl who just got her period at the same time! It's not normal, Naruto..."
"And soon you are going to tell me that men lives longer than women, right?" Naruto leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms, trying to look smart in front of his friend. It's not that he wanted to brush away his friends understanding and caring, it's just that he didn't want someone involved. Kiba wouldn't believe him anyway, he would just think of it like a joke.
"Naruto, men do live longer than women."
"… My life is a lie." With that the blonde dropped his head at the table, trying to look dramatic.
Kiba shook his head and sighed for the second time. "Why won't you just tell me?"
The blonde grunted and stretched his back, facing his friend fully.
"Fine. My aunt called and said that my uncle just died – whoever he is. My boss fired me because of a reason unknown, maybe he had a secret crush on me and decided he couldn't take it anymore, whatever. And oh, I slept with a teacher a few weeks ago."
Kiba's fist collided with the table and made a few students look their way.
"Why can't you just be serious for once?" Kiba's face lit with rage, all red and matching his tattoos.
"Kiba –" Before Naruto could say he was sorry - not that he had lied or anything but an apology would fit in pretty well right about now – Kiba cut in with standing up and leaving after mumbling a few words.
"Just forget that I cared."
Having a friend mad at you can really get on your nerves and your mind is mostly occupied on things to do just to make it all better again. Naruto was still thinking on what to say and when to say it, but still not knowing why he should be the one taking the step and not Kiba.
He didn't want to say what was on his mind right now, why couldn't his friends just accept that? Sakura looked worried too and tried all sort of things to cheer him up, Shan would just ignore him but who would like that guy to cheer you up? He would probably say the wrong things, like his cousin Sai.
Anyway, back to Kiba.
Maybe he should try flowers, candy and a movie for Kiba to pick. But he have already done that once, and it all ended up with laughter and a pop-corn fight and a stroll down the part to scare old people and newly happy, lovey-dovey couples.
Ah, good times.
"Stupid lighter!" Naruto tried his best to get his most likely dying lighter to live just to light his last cigarette, but it seemed like lady luck had turned against him today.
"Yes!"
… Or maybe she wanted to entertain herself with teasing.
His face lit up thankfully, but it didn't stay like that for long. He dropped both cancer-stick and dying lighter down in a puddle of water. He blinked with wide eyes and couldn't believe what had just happened, how had he dropped them in the first place? He grabbed his hair with his hand and let out a disapproval sound of despair.
He heard a slurred laughter behind him and turned his head around, his face confused and torn out on the event that had just happened.
"You are really amusing, kid."
The drunk who Kiba and he had met just a few weeks ago and said person that had borrowed his cell phone, but Naruto didn't have time to care, his face hadn't changed one bit- he wanted that damn cigarette in his mouth and not on the wet ground swimming.
"If I had known you easily got scared, I wouldn't have patted your back." The older man looked amused, not really sounding sorry for making the blonde drop the objects he had held.
But wait, he is the reason why Naruto dropped them in the first place? The shock must've blocked that out completely.
Naruto faced the man fully and gave him a face full of rage, or something that can be described like that.
"You really are amusing." The man smiled a little, if it now could be described as a smile. He then covered his mouth with his hand and coughed for a while, soon after trying to get his breath steady.
Naruto just watched, not asking if he were feeling okay or not.
"Want to borrow my cell phone again?" He asked after the tall man had calmed down a little bit.
The older shook his head and ran a hand through his damp hair, showing of his pale face a little more than he had before. He looked so worn out and almost destroyed, Naruto felt sorry for a moment but that was just a passing feeling a normal person would get.
"No no, I'm actually getting picked up by my younger sibling in a few minutes. But I got tired of just standing, so I walked over to you since I remembered your messy hair." The man reached out to ruffle Naruto's hair, as if making a point in his words but the blonde avoided it and backed away a step.
"And I remember you 'cause of your drunken state."
The man looked blank for a moment, staring down at the shorter. Naruto tensed for a moment; maybe he should have just kept quiet. But the older man shrugged, probably sensing that the younger had regretted his choice of words in a way.
"Itachi." He said all of a sudden.
"Huh?" Naruto looked up at him.
"Itachi Uchiha, my name."
With hearing the last name Naruto weren't all that surprised, he had kind of figured it out a few weeks ago after all. But he still got a slight chock to know that he had been right of him and Sasuke being siblings.
"Right." The blonde said after a while, feeling stupid with just standing there and staring with his mind drifting to other things than the man in front of him.
"… Naruto Uzumaki." He shifted a little, running a hand through his hair a little embarrassed. Itachi didn't seem to care about the long pause after his name had been said, the guy didn't look quite in his mind anyway.
A car slowed down beside them, a black one that Naruto remember seeing before. He could see Itachi move from the corner of his eyes towards it, opening the door and then looking back at the blonde boy.
"You want a ride?" He asked calmly.
Naruto answered his question with shaking his head. "I don't live that far away from here, so no thanks."
Itachi nodded and entered the car, not saying anything more. Naruto saluted with his hand and walked away just as the car started to drive away, not caring if anyone in the car saw him say good-bye.
The truth was that he didn't want to walk home; he had been out in the cold for three hours tops. But getting into the same cars as his teacher whom he had slept with would just seem wrong and awkward. It felt uneasy enough just to see that person in class, his free time didn't need to see him as well.
Actually neither of them had said anything about it; they acted like normal, almost. Naruto didn't comment him as much in class anymore, not that he did it all of the time before but still. Sasuke had pretty much been swimming around in the blondes head, giving him a headache and a frustrated groan a little now and then. It's probably this that have made Kiba react so much, but that's how a friend should be.
Truth to be told, he had liked that night/morning with Sasuke. True, it had felt empty but that didn't mean that he hadn't enjoyed what had happened. But it had also felt wrong and what had felt even more wrong had been that he wanted more, even if it was from his teacher.
Naruto had never questioned his sexuality before, never really had reason for it. He had always been attractive to girls, never seeing a guy in that way, but after that night with Sasuke he didn't know how to see things anymore. Maybe he just looked into this sexually; maybe he wanted the guys in bed and the girls to look at? To think like that is even more then wrong.
The blonde took a deep breath and tried to move everything in his mind to the side, making everything blank so that he wouldn't have anything to think about. But it wasn't that easy, the more he thought about it the more he wanted to redo that night again. It didn't have to be with Sasuke, it could be with another guy. Is it even normal to think like this?
Naruto let out a loud grunt when he entered his apartment, he would go directly to sleep. No shower, no nothing, just sleep. That's why he made a loud sigh when he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket; to answer wasn't on his to-do list right now.
He watched the display and his eyes widened, not sure if he should let the phone drop to the floor or answer it. Seeing Sasuke's name – ignoring the fact that he had added his teacher on his contact list – on the display gave him butterflies and a confused mind to deal with. He answered a little unsure, holding his breath when he heard Sasuke say his name.
"Y-yeah?" Naruto swallowed and cursed himself for stuttering.
"… He didn't do anything, right?"
By 'he' Naruto knew that Sasuke meant Itachi. Naruto let his breath out, shaking his head and then remembering that the other couldn't see him.
"He haven't before, so why would he now?"
Sasuke kept quite. Naruto sat down on the floor, leaning onto the wall with his eyes slightly shut.
"… What kind of person is he? I remember that the first time when I saw him he-"
"He has something like mood-swings. Don't think about it,"
Sasuke didn't even wait for the younger to finish before he had cut in, probably already knowing what the blonde would have said. But the blonde felt like there was more into this about Itachi, after all, he still remember that bruise Sasuke had the first time he had met the older sibling. But it's not like he have any proof that Itachi had been the one to punch him in the first place.
… He wanted to slap himself for getting too carried away in his thoughts.
"… Do you mind if I come over?"
Naruto's breath got cough in his throat and his eyes widened for a few seconds before going back to being half open. He knew what Sasuke meant by saying that, a normal guy wouldn't come over one AM on a weekend and watch a movie or do other stuff guys usually do together.
The blonde got nervous, letting out his breath and furrowed his brows. He didn't know what to say; maybe he did go to bed and is dreaming all this?
"You can come." He said after a minute with silence, not knowing if Sasuke still were on the other side.
Everything started to blur. Sasuke hung up after telling the blonde he would be there soon. Naruto stared at his phone, his heart racing like a wild horse on crack. A knock reached his ears and he turned his attention to the door, how long had his mind gone blank?
Sasuke opened the door - had he forgotten to lock it? – And looked down at the younger with the black eyes of his as the blonde met it with his blue. His teacher locked the door behind him while Naruto stood up, still leaning against the wall, his eyes no longer in Sasuke's direction.
The older let his breath ghost over the blondes tanned skin, leaning his head against the blonde's and his hands on the arms of the other. Naruto closed his eyes and took in the others scent, what would he do if his friends found out about this? What would Sakura say when she found out that he had been closer to Sasuke then she had been?
The older kissed Naruto's skin and the blonde let out a small sound, not really enjoying Sasuke's cold and dry lips. The blonde touched the older man's stomach under his shirt, not liking that it too felt so cold. Had the other been outside when he had called him?
Sasuke removed his jacket and grabbed the younger boys head, tilting it and kissing him on the lips.
The blonde closed his eyes and let his mind drift; he could stand the cold for the moment.
Sasuke had left that morning as well, but Naruto didn't blame him for it, he would probably have done the same thing. And that was yesterday, which didn't really make sense on why he brooded over it on the Monday morning. He still hadn't fixed things between him and Kiba and he still didn't know how to settle down himself when it came to thinking about what he should do.
A finger connected to his forehead hard, making the blonde slap his forehead with his hand to protect it and then looking up at the one who had attacked him.
"You space out too much, have someone ever told you that?" Kiba smirked down at him before taking a seat beside his friend with a friendly smile gracing his face.
Naruto's eyes softened, his hand leaving the attacked place slowly, smiling faintly at his friend in return.
"I know you can do better than that." Sakura smiled with both eyes and pink glossy lips while she took a chair to sit in front of the two boys.
Naruto raised an eye-brow at her, she giggled softly and bended over to grab his chins, dragging them painfully up.
"Smile like you did before!" She released him and he rubbed his face. First giving her a glare, but slowly, breaking into a wide grin.
Sakura smiled and Kiba smirking a little bit.
Naruto liked being like this and for some reason he found it easier to smile then before, he didn't know why. But his heart felt free, even if his head felt heavier with things he couldn't really figure out.
To be continued
So I am slow, like usual. This FanFic is moving slowly as well and not just the update, but the fic as well. But after reading Atrophy's comment I got really happy and decided to take this fic like it comes. And yeah, yet-another-Gaara-fangirl, I should get a beta but... I'm such a slow write that the beta would probably get tired of me, and I think the ones reading what I've been writing understands anyway? I hope you guys do
Hikari no Kurai, I love your reviews! Actually I love everyone's, but hers is so long and always makes me smile when I read them!
Review, please!