Sam didn't have time for lengthy conversations about London and everything that had happened there and since then. He needed to get to Dean, and fast. He had no idea what the demon was doing to him, and the longer they went without finding him, the more Sam worried.

"Sadie, I need to know how to find Dean. Right now, that's all that matters."

Sadie glanced at John, now sleeping soundly on the couch. She knew that her son had more to do with Dean's disappearance than Dean did, but how did she explain all this to Sam without telling him the full truth? Perhaps it was finally time for full disclosure, but Sadie wasn't entirely ready to go there yet. She took a deep breath, and without a word to Sam, went to the couch and picked up John, blanket and all. She carried the boy down the small hallway to his bedroom and laid him gently in his bed. She watched with a sad smile as he licked his lips and settled against the pillow all while still asleep. Her poor baby boy had been through so much confusion already, and she knew that there was only more to come. It really broke her heart that he was paying the price now for what she'd once been.

Sadie flipped on the night light beside the small bed and left the room, leaving the door cracked open slightly just in case he needed her. She returned to the living room, looking from Ruby to Sam. She knew that Sam needed answers, but unfortunately, there weren't many that she could give. "I don't know how much help I'll be on the matter of finding Dean. I don't have the… abilities I once had."

Sam's frustration was ready to bubble over. He looked to Ruby who only shrugged her shoulders at him. She was just as confused as he was on that subject. "What do you mean, Sadie? You're half-demon. How do you lose that?"

"The same way you've become it, Sam!" she snapped at him. "It was a choice I had to make, and I made it. I hated the demon half of me. I always have. I never wanted this life."

Sam felt like he'd been slapped in the face. How in the hell did Sadie know about him? No one knew about all that except Ruby. Not even Dean had a clue what Sam was doing to himself. He tried not to let the emotions he felt play on his face, but one thing Sam didn't have much of was a poker face. He frowned at Sadie, but didn't respond to that particular issue yet. Again, it was something that could wait until after they found Dean. "How did you do that?" he asked, forcing the conversation back onto Sadie.

"I made a deal with a demon, much like you've done," she said quietly before looking over her shoulder at Ruby. "My last night in London, before I left you guys, I went back to the crossroads where Dean and I had talked to Sasha. I gave Lilith what she wanted even more than Dean – my powers. With my demon powers melded with hers, she would have been very nearly strong enough to overthrow Lucifer. Lilith doesn't want to let Lucifer out of his prison so he can rule the earth. She wants to take his place and be the one in charge. With my powers, she would almost be able to do that."

Sam could hardly believe what he was hearing. Lilith could potentially be even more powerful than Lucifer by now? That thought sent chills down his spine. If she was growing in power, would he be able to stop her even with Ruby's help? He tried not to let the thoughts overwhelm him just quite yet, though. There were more important things to deal with at the moment. "What was the deal, Sadie? You gave up your powers to Lilith in exchange for what?"

Sadie looked at Sam like he was crazy. She looked to Ruby expecting to see a playful smile on the little bitch's face. Surely they were teasing her. Sam had to know what had happened that night in London by now. "You're joking, right? Surely you know what happened."

Sam shook his head and again a frown creased his brow. "No, Sadie. I don't know. What happened?"

Sadie stared at him a moment longer before it finally really sunk in that he didn't know what she was talking about. "You really don't know," she said out loud, more to hear the words spoken than necessarily speaking to anyone. Sadie sat back on the couch, sinking into the soft cushions and sighing heavily. "Okay, well – it's a long story, and there's a lot to it, but the bottom line is – I gave up my powers to save Dean from his hell contract. I made sure that Lilith let him out of it."

Sam stared at Sadie in amazement. "What the fuck are you talking about, Sadie? Dean wasn't let out of his contract. Not really. It was delayed a few weeks, but he still was hunted down by hell hounds and drug off to hell!" Sam was furious and his voice rose louder as he neared the end of the statement. "He spent four months down there!" he shouted, temporarily forgetting and honestly not really caring about the sleeping boy just down the hall.

Sadie was on her feet in an instant. She shushed Sam and held her hands up in a gesture of 'be quiet' all at the same time. "What the fuck are you talking about, Sam?!" she asked angrily, throwing his own question back at him. "I made sure of it! Dean was let out of his contract!"

Sam shook his head, the soft mop of hair that was longer than he liked bouncing around as he did. "No, Sadie. He wasn't! Believe me. I was the one who had to learn to live without him."

Sadie stood in the middle of the small room fuming. Imagine that. A demon had lied to her - and not just any demon – the spokesperson for Lilith herself. The words that Sasha had spoken to her that night had been binding – a contract of her own that was supposed to be unbreakable. Sadie's internal anger grew and for a moment, the blackness of her past very nearly showed up in her eyes – the way a demon's eyes were supposed to be. They didn't quite make it, but they came as close as humanly possible.

"Sam, I need you to look after John for me," Sadie said stoically as she reached down and picked up her tennis shoes from the floor by the front door. She bent over as she slipped them onto her feet one at a time.

"What? Where the hell are you going?" Sam snapped at her as he reached out to grab her arm in attempt to stop her.

Sadie spun around, jerking her arm as she did and yanking it free of Sam's grasp. Her eyes, still dark with anger, very nearly shot daggers at him. "I'm going to find out where Dean is. You and Ruby stay here. And I mean it. Don't leave this house. Ruby won't be able to anyway, seeing as how the whole house is one big devil's trap. You stay here with John, and don't let anyone or anything anywhere near my son."

With that, Sadie stormed out off the small house and before Sam could even think about protesting further, she was in her car and pulling out of the driveway with a screech of tires.