Rachel packed a picnic basket lunch of cucumber sandwiches, an apple, red grapes, and a power drink in a cold pack, got in her Accord and drove to grandmother's house in the woods, sorry, I mean Groman's Music near downtown Lima. The wolf that lay in wait for her that day had no big teeth, had not devoured granny whole, but was in fact the original Rachel Berry, over which the faking-it Rachel Berry had only tenuous control and had to constantly struggle to keep at bay.
Rachel was in a good mood, a very good mood indeed, initiated by that early morning's extra-passionate love-making provided by her ephemeral beau, Will Schuester. While her unconscious had summoned him to bring her near climax, her conscious would not allow such an inappropriate relationship, so it resorted to the more socially acceptable imagined fingers of Finn Hudson to finish the job. Such was the bifurcated life of Rachel Berry. There was no multiple-personality syndrome, no schizophrenia, just an invention mothered by the necessity of a very complicated girl needing to cope with her very complicated world.
In some sense, Rachel's situation wasn't even that unusual, as countless married gay men and long-term cheating spouses could attest. One simply accommodates to the immediate environment, which can sometimes change from second to second. One speaks to a lover on the bedroom phone, then comes downstairs to hug the spouse and kiss the children. It's so easy. But one does have to remember this golden rule: no proper names when you come, just a generic "Oh, darling." Mistakes can be costly.
Rachel's first allegiance, of course, was to her two gay dads, or "the kike and the dyke" as they fondly teased themselves. They were, in fact, highly educated, well-travelled and well-read men, who wanted everything for their darling Rachel, and brought her up from the very beginning to be as knowledgeable, smart and talented as possible. They took her with them everywhere, talked to her about everything, and gave her every freedom to explore and mature. They stayed in Lima to care for aging parents, so McKinley High had to serve as Rachel's purgatory, where she toughened for her future.
For the past several summers, Rachel had attended musical theater camps, where prodigies in every genre from across the country assembled to compete for leading roles and the sexual favors of each other and very predatory twenty-somethings. Rachel was no exception, and her sneaky hotness was the object of many obscure desires. Without going into too much detail, let's just say Rachel gave as good as she got. Imagine, then, the contrast with her situation at William McKinley High School, populated mainly by bozos and barbarians. There were exceptions of course, such as the sweet and gorgeous Finn Hudson, and the sexy and dangerous Noah Puckerman, whom she vowed never to fuck lest she become another notch on his bedpost. And then there was Will Schuester. She had slept with men not that much younger than he, but few as truly talented, and none as worthy. She wished she could have told him that.
She parked the Accord at around 11 am, changed into her open-toed heels, did a few giddy spins to check her balance, and entered the store. She felt good, she thought she looked good, the staff loved her, and she loved her secret lover Will for making the start of her day so good. She was on top of the world.