DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT

A/N: Special thanks to: & Pace1818!

so now is awkward edward and bella disucussion time... enjoy :)

"Hold on just a second, I need to grab some food." I said to Edward.

I rushed to the kitchen and heated up some left over food. It burned my throat as I scarfed it down. I gargled down some water and went to put my dishes in the sink. I turned around and he was sitting at the table.

Why does he have to be so fast?

I sat down in front of him.

"Talk." I said pursing my lips.

"You're mad at me." He stated.

"That's not a question. But yes I am." I said.

"Why?"

"Oh gosh, Edward. Why wouldn't I be mad at you?"

"Okay I guess it's time I explained."

"Pretty much."

He hesitated and then started. "When Jasper attacked you, and you got hurt. I couldn't forgive myself. I thought that by being with you, you were only just going to die and get hurt in front my very own eyes. I wanted you to have a nice long happy life. Be able to grow old, have kids. Have a normal life.

"But I couldn't give that to you. And the more I was with the you, the more you had a chance of dying. So I thought the best thing was for us not to be together. So I left. Believe me it was the hardest decision, I've ever made in all of my existence. And I deeply regret it." His eyes showed that he truly meant it. I believe him, but that doesn't mean I was going to forgive him easily. "I love you and I always have. I had to lie. You believe me so easily."

I couldn't live without him either, even though I wouldn't admit it.

"Alright." I said.

"So you guys are serious?" He was staring at my bracelet.

"Um, yeah I guess." This was so awkward.

"Do you still love me?" He asked out of the blue.

"No. Not in the way I used too." I said. I felt the hole burn again. Why did it hurt to say this?

"How bad was it Bella? When I left?" He asked sincerely.

"Really bad too be honest." I decided to tell him everything. And I didn't hold anything back. I wanted him to hear the pain I went through. The happiness I experienced. The craziness, the anger, and the love. I even told him about my hallucinations. He was a little upset by that.

"So you risked your life just so you could hear my voice?" He asked.

"Yeah I guess so." I nodded. He winced.

"I guess I should get going, it's late and you have school tomorrow."

He sat up and started walking toward the door. He opened it and then he said, "You know, everyone has been wanting to see you."

I raised my eyebrows. "Rosalie?"

"Everyone except her." He smiled.

"Sure okay."

"Alright, I'll pick you up after school then?"

"Yup." I leaned in and gave him a hug. I whispered, "Thanks so much Edward."

We pulled from the hug. "For what?" He asked.

"For listening." I stated.

He started walking off into the distance.

My brain was going to explode. I had way too many thoughts going through my head.

I walked into the kitchen and looked at the clock on the wall.

7:30.

Charlie should be home soon. I got out leftover food, and heated it up for him. When I was carefully pulling it out of the microwave, the front door opened, followed by Charlie's footsteps.

"Hey Bells." He grabbed the food, and went to the living room to watch some game on tonight.

I trudged up the stairs, today's events started to have their effect on me.

It was freezing cold, I walked into my room, hurrying to my closet.

I grabbed sweatpants, a tank top, and a jacket.

Only in Forks would I need to wear a jacket in bed.

I slipped on the clothing, about to turn to my bed, ready to curl up with a blanket and a book, when my brain registered that there was someone making room for me on my bed.

My eyes adjusted, and the horror washed off my face.

"Jacob!" I tried to keep myself from yelling in delight.

He was much better than a blanket. He patted the space next to him, "Why does your house smell like vampire?" He asked. He started trembling a little.

I crawled onto his lap, and wrapped my arms around him, and kissed him quickly.

"Bella," He complained. "I know I'm a dog, but I'm not stupid." He sighed, and pushed me away a little. "Stop trying to distract me and answer my question. Please?" His black eyes burned into my own.

"No, you'll get mad." I looked down, unable to look at him.

"Bella I could never be mad at you." He made the puppy dog face. It was pretty hilarious.

I laughed quickly. "He was here. To explain things." I dragged it out slowly.

His whole body froze, and a quick tremble went through him. Then his face turned into pity. "Are you okay?" He asked sincerely.

"Yeah, I am." Lie. "It helped, to talk to him." Well I wasn't lying with the last part.

He pulled me closer. "I love you." He whispered.

"I love you too." I smiled. "You know, us humans actually sleep. And I have school tomorrow, so…"

"First of all, I do sleep. It's just I'm to busy protecting you." He said with a grin. I hated the fact that he didn't get sleep, because he was looking out for me. "And you could sleep if you wanted." He scooted over, and left just enough room for me.

I turned off the light and pressed into Jacob's warm skin. I buried my face into his chest, and his head was right above mine.

He kissed the top of my head lightly.

I slowly felt myself falling asleep.

The same dream of myself in Edward's arms haunted me again. My leg gushing blood, as we walked through the forest.

Jacob brought me back from reality, when he bolted up out of the bed. He stared at the window. I could swear I saw something.

"Bella, I need to go on patrol." He whispered in my ear. He pecked my cheek and left.

I just fell back on the bed, too tired to protest.

a/n: Nothing much to really say here except... follow the arrows

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