Itachi heard the sound of the shower running in the bathroom as he went inside the bedroom and towards the vanity stand.
He was looking for his Italian cologne and his platinum cufflinks to match his silver silk tie.
After he sprayed himself and put on his cufflinks, the water stopped and moments later a wet Sakura clad in only a light pink towel walked out of the bathroom. He didn't turn around to greet her, instead he watched her approach him in the mirror.
"You know when electronics are thrown into bodies of water, they stop working," she informed him in a slightly raspy voice as she crossed her arms. He wasn't sure if it sounded like a morning-sex voice or sore-throat-after-a-concert voice. She had slept a good 40 plus hours in a luxurious bed, and Itachi had spent two nights on the couch. The pink-haired woman had no right to complain over some stupid piece of electronics as far as he was concerned.
"Hn," he responded as he turned his attention to knotting his tie.
"I don't recall ordering these horrendous pieces of furniture…" she continued.
"Hn."
His peripheral vision caught her face change; it was blatantly obvious how she was trying to restrain herself from knocking his head into the mirror. He restrained his own smirk – he was enjoying this.
"Going somewhere?"
"Yes," Itachi responded buttoning his gray vest over his tie, "a date," he added – for what reason, he didn't know.
"Oh, hmmmm, is she deaf?"
"No."
"Mute?"
"No."
"Blind?"
"No."
"Real?"
"Yes," Itachi answered in a hiss as he turned around and loamed over her intimidating.
She wasn't in the least bit fazed, "if you're going to pull an LBJ, I suggest more finger pointing and yelling."
Itachi was slightly shocked by her Johnson treatment reference; her mind seemed to work without an identifiable pattern but that didn't mean he couldn't keep up with her. He was Itachi, after all – no political reference ever escaped him.
"He only did that to people who worked for him – I'd never hire you, you're too under qualified," the Uchiha male responded walking past her and towards the hallway.
"Why you little…" Sakura growled under her breath.
.
…
.
The doorbell rang, and Itachi placed his half finished glass of whiskey down on the kitchen counter and grabbed his suit jacket off the chair.
Maria had insisted on coming to get him, she liked being overbearing like that, and it might have had something to do with the last time he was suppose to pick her up, he got sidetrack by something or other and didn't show up.
After he unlocked and opened the door, he was greeted by, arguably, the most beautiful woman that money could buy. She had impossibly bright blue eyes and wavy bleach blonde hair and a great big smile which showed off her stainless and glossy white teeth. Her figure was over exaggerated due to years of plastic surgery to reach porn-star perfection and her short little dark blue dress did an excellent job accentuating it all.
"Hello, Maria," he greeted politely, and suddenly her smile fell into a look of horror.
He was unable to assess the situation properly or fast enough as one slender arm wrapped around his waist and another one around his arm. He felt two soft breasts pushed up against his elbow.
"Itachi-love, is this the masseuse you ordered for me?" Sakura purred sensually.
"Wha-what is going on?" Maria's expression was priceless and completely indescribable. The botox had frozen areas of her face which should have wrinkled up with disgust and shock.
"Dear," Sakura turned closer to him and rubbed her body up against him sexually, "I wasn't done with you, yet."
When Itachi's cold, angry, and frustrated eyes glared down at her, he realized she was half naked…taking that thought back – she was naked. See-through lace bra and panties did not count as clothing in his book.
He watched her turn to look at Maria, "are you going to come in? I have a sore spot right on my lower back," her slightly raspy voice made her sound all the more alluring and nymphic, "Itachi had flipped me upside down while we were doing it doggy style on the bed…and then he wanted to do it up against the window…I'm terribly sore now. He's been trying to make it better…alllllllllll day," she moaned out as she leaned her head on his shoulder, smiling wickedly at the blonde.
"I…uh," he could see the tears forming in Maria's eyes but Itachi, himself was at a loss for words – he didn't know Sakura could be so foolhardy, "there…I'm…I don't…," Maria tried to choke out something compressible.
"Oh dear," Sakura moved to the side, giving Maria a full view of her naked body and the jealousy in Maki's insecure face was something no amount of Botox would ever hide, "do you have the wrong apartment?"
"I…uh…yes, yes I do. I'm sor-sorry, bye!" her heels clicked behind her as she retreated towards the elevator to cry her eyes out in peace.
"Hah, man – that woman's had too much work done…au natural – best way to go," Sakura responded as she kicked the door closed and was about to walk away but Itachi had finally decided to act. He grabbed her arm and shoved her roughly with her back to the wall and then caged her between his outstretched arms.
"Mmmm?" She looked up at him innocently.
"What the fuck was that?" He snarled out in anger. He had never, in his whole life been frozen in a situation. This was ridiculous.
"Actually…I really do have this terribly sore spot…do you think maybe I should see a chiropractor?" she continued with the seductress façade.
"I would never sleep with someone like you – I have better taste," he said aiming at her pride.
"Better is a relative and subjective term, but I think you are totally right, Miss. Barbie is totally your type – rich, fake, and brainless; just like you…I am so in out of my league with her…screw league, I don't think I'm in the same species as her," she countered defiantly, dropping the sweet girl act and showing her bitch-side.
"Heh," he couldn't defend Maria even if he wanted to, "you are very interesting you know that?" he moved his face closer to hers, she was witty, he'd give her that.
She moved her head back till it touched the wall, and he continued talking as he bent his elbows to get even closer to her, "I warn you, princess," he whispered and she could feel his sweet hot alcohol flavored breath on her face.
It was her turn to be frozen in place.
"I will make you suffer," he said.
She wanted to say, "I like it rough," with a smirk and challenge him but her voice got stuck somewhere between her stomach and pelvis. She wanted to slap him but his eyes were so close that they seemed to glow a slight red in the orange light of the room. She wanted to punch his jaw, but his face was too flawless and she wanted him to get closer. While at the same time wanted to knee him in the groan and make a run for it, but he made her feel as though she was chained to the wall.
It was wrong.
All wrong.
And it got worse.
It went from wrong to unethical the moment he placed his lips against hers.
It wasn't a sweet and chaste kiss – it was rough and mean. It was hard and powerful. It was a kiss from someone who had flunked out of anger management classes. It was the kiss of domination. She remained frozen as he raped her mouth and she wasn't even able to stop him. She wasn't sure she even wanted to.
He grabbed her bottom lip, and sucked on it harshly before biting it between his teeth and tugging it. He let go and moved his face away from her, the smug expression on his beautiful face was the type seen in Vogue on males who knew they had it all. His eyes blazing straight at hers made her feel helpless.
"I doubt you will be able to handle it," he said as he locked his elbows and looked at her up and down from head to toe – twice.
After Sakura had reached puberty she had never – ever felt insecure about her body, until Itachi had blatantly checked her out in her see-through lace lingerie.
He breathed a "tch", and moved away from her and walked down the hall into the office room. The door slammed shut.
Sakura's knees gave out and she slid down to the chilly marble floor. Her mind normally worked quickly, but at that moment it worked too quickly – she was incapable of following her own thoughts. What had just happened was impossibly wrong. She should have hit him, hurt him in ways that would cause him to suffer permanent damage. But she had done nothing. She allowed him to dominate her. In all her relationships, she was always the one in charge – the one to initiate. The one to allow.
.
…
.
Itachi went into the office and began to think of every single vile thought he could.
Apparently he was more of harmonious male than he liked to believe.
Naruto and Sasuke kissing….Olives…Shisui….
"Ugh," he snarled as his hard on refused to go away. Every time he tried to think of something he didn't like, his mind flashed the image of a submissive Sakura clad in nearly nothing.
God damn photographic memory.
She was turning him into some sort of idiot.
.
…
.
It only took a few moments for Sakura to recover herself, because when a situation became too complicated for her – she'd always turn to math problems. She was never good at confronting her emotions.
½ + it, and she went about trying to prove that the non trivial zeros of the Riemann Zeta-function lie on the critical line.
She forced herself into the bedroom and walked towards the corner that Itachi had – all so kindly identified as hers, and grabbed her pajamas, physics textbook, pencil, and scrap book from the stacked boxes. She had to avoid addressing the previous moment – the kiss… psychology was a soft science – what good was it in the real world? Math worked…always. As her mind continued to play with numbers, she changed and then glared at the bed.
Fuck it, her normally quiet inner self spat, the bastard stole your furniture – it's as much your bed as his! By not sleeping in it, that would be like raising a white flag. Sakura was not one to even carry a white flag.
She nodded to herself and sat on the right side of the bed and opened her scrap book and began to play around with equations.
.
…
.
Eventually – thinking of Shisui and Anko having sex calmed him down enough for him to regain control over his body. He cleared his throat and furrowed his eyebrows.
He would not be bested by anyone, especially not himself.
Itachi stepped outside of the office, with a law book in hand and walked into the bedroom – she was not going to take the bed again.
When he entered, Sakura didn't even take her eyes off her notebook as she scribbled furiously, and he did not fail to notice how the entire left side of the bed was empty. It was almost inviting. In the same way a cheetah invites a gazelle into her domain.
He resisted throwing the thousand page leather-bound book at her when she put the pencil between her lips almost teasingly.
Two could play.
Two could play…
Itachi placed his book on the bed and went about changing in the same room as her.
Sakura noticed him after the book made a thump sound and when she looked up – he was shirtless. She turned her attention back on her math problem, but her eyes (without permission) wandered to him after he took off his pants to reveal black silk boxers. She licked her lips unconsciousness and he glanced up in time to notice the action.
Red faced and angry at herself, she glued her eyes to her work. What the hell made her want to solve the Euler-Mascheroni Constant conundrum when thousands of mathematicians couldn't was beyond her at that point because she could feel the bed shift and the numbers on her paper no longer made sense. Her eyes begged to look to the side.
They were screaming at it.
Why did the asshole have to be so pretty? He had an eight pack set of abs, who the hell has an eight pack? And his hair was more luscious than hers. It was ridiculous.
She grabbed her pencil out of her mouth and pointed it at the limit equations and started the entire problem all over again. She mentally yelled every number on the page to herself, but had to start again when Itachi distracted her by his movement and page shuffling.
Bastard.
Then, thanks to the deities of all science and goodness, her mind clicked again and she understood the math junk written all over the page. She quickly applied the hadjicostas's formula to the last function she was working on and began to expand and break it down as much as possible.
She was alone in the room.
He was not there.
He was not in his boxers.
He was not reading a book in bed next to her.
He did not smell utterly divine of…
She sniffed the air.
It was like vanilla – something so sweet but mixed with a woodsy smell she remembered from when she went camping. It was sweet in a natural and manly way.
Math problem! Math problem!
The page looked like gargle again.
"Apply Merten's Theorem," he said dully.
She looked at him in shock, but his eyes were back on his law book.
Part of Sakura wanted to stab him with a pencil, the other part wanted to tell him to mind his own business. Instead she did the third most immature thing she could; she closed her notebook and placed it on the nightstand beside her, reached for her physics text book and opened it. She began reading all the wonderful theorems and discoveries.
Sadly, she couldn't make sense of anything as her mind would wander to him every other sentence, so she had to turn the page more for effect than actually progressive reading. The bastard had kissed her, and he was acting so nonchalant about it…it pissed her off.
Itachi retained from chuckling when she slammed her notebook shut after he tried to assist her and the intense look of concentration as she read the physics textbook was almost comical.
But he was also suffering.
Itachi couldn't keep his eyes from glancing at her own reading material. He was somewhere between the sixth amendment interpretations and Newton's use of the reflective telescope and its furthered development into the 21st century. That was some very fuzzy and interesting middle ground.
This lasted well into two in the morning since neither they were apparently having an unspoken contest. Sakura was the first to pass out; her face pressed against the pages of her physics books.
Itachi sighed. He couldn't believe his immaturity level.
.
…
.
Itachi had woken up first to find that his pillow had been stolen sometime in the middle of the night. When he looked over at Sakura, she was using it as a stuffed animal, cuddling it close to her chest.
"Idiot," he half muttered, half whispered as he got out of bed, rubbing his neck gently to ease the stiffness.
After his morning workout, he entered the bedroom to use the master-bathroom and found that Sakura had already left. She had made the bed, and placed the stolen pillow back on his side.
Itachi remembered Sakura's schedule by heart, and knew today was the day she did rounds with the interns.
Payback was going to be sweet. Shisui had already called him over thirty times the night before, wanting an explanation of what happened. But before he could tell his cousin how Sakura had gotten the better of him – he was going to get the better of her.
.
…
.
"Good morning Mr. Leeroy," Sakura greeted one of the patients as a group of eight interns followed her closely.
"Good morning, Sakura," the middle aged man smiled at her as he looked back at the T.V screen showing Wheel of Fortune reruns.
"Mr. Leeroy has spinal stenosis, what would be the appropriate mode of action?" she turned to students.
"Chondroitin sulfate and glucosamine," one of the boys answered.
"Good, but not very effective – next."
"Decompressive laminectomy," the shortest girl in the group offered.
"For surgery – yes that would be a good option, what else would be good to do during the laminectomy procedure?" Sakura asked but before anyone could respond, someone called her name.
A very evil somebody.
When Sakura looked at the owner of the voice, a part of her wished that she had a reset and rewind button handy. Something bad was about to happen…she could feel it.
"Sakura," Itachi said with a smile…a fake smile.
"Excuse me sir, but I am busy. Some of us prefer to save lives instead of place them into financially draining legal binds," Sakura replied coldly.
"And," he began moving between the crowd of interns so he could be standing in full view of her, "some of us prefer our partners to be faithful," his smile dropped, "how could you Sakura? Having sex with an eighty-five year old man? And getting crabs from him! I would have never thought you were such a little slut."
Sakura's eyes widened tenfold before she could even register the situation. The hospital had gone eerily silent as everyone paid close attention to the display of a romantic dispute by two of Konoha's leading figures.
"I'm sorry, Sakura," Itachi said sadly and cocked his head to the side so only she could see the smug and maliciously evil expression on his face, "I can't be with someone like you…I just…I just deserve better than someone like you…I can't be your dominatrix lover anymore," he said turning around and walking out.
"Uh…Doctor. Haruno?" One of interns asked in fear as their teacher's expression changed from shock to pure utter furry.
"I am going to rip his fucking balls off!" She snarled as she pushed her way through her interns and two nurses as she ran after the bastard who had just insinuated that she was in a relationship with him, had an old man fetish, was unfaithful, and had crabs.
That was low.
She would never be in a relationship with him!
Ever!
She finally caught up with him as he exited out the hospital and began to walk down the street.
"YOU BASTARD!" Sakura screamed as she grabbed his arm and forced him to face her, but before logic kicked in, she had already decked him in the face.
Because that's what pissed off doctors did in front of hospitals. They punched the town's most prestigious lawyers.
She went to uppercut him in the solar plex, because really – if she happened to shatter a rib or two in the process at least the emergency room was nearby.
But Itachi, first stunned that the petite little doctor could pack a punch was not going to be done in twice. He quickly side stepped her second attack and used her fierce momentum to grab her arm, and twist her around so she was bent over a nearby parked car with her arm locked behind her.
A group of paramedics stopped loading their truck to look at them.
"I don't think this is very proper," Itachi whispered.
Again, to his surprise Sakura had managed to twist herself out of his lock and did a spinning kick to his face. He blocked it at point blank and wrapped his arm around her ankle and calf, forcing her back on the hood of the car and leaned forward, applying threatening pressure to her ankle.
"You seem to like the provocative positions don't you?" He smirked.
Then Sakura headbutted him.
She headbutted him.
What girl in their right mind headbutts a guy?
But it was enough for him to loosen his grip on her slightly and she tried to kick him away, but he quickly used his skills in grappling to flip her onto the pavement (properly so no spinal damage was done), and locked her with his legs around her waist and both of their hands were on eachothers throats – trying to choke the other out.
It wasn't in the best position for her and because of the arm length difference she was barely able to apply any pressure to him.
"You lose, admit it, and leave the apartment," Itachi said as he placed his thumb on her collar bone.
Sakura shut her eyes tightly from the pain, "no, you jackass!" she gasped out.
"You'd rather lose consciousness then move out?" Itachi asked dully – her irrationality was becoming more and more dangerous, for both of them.
Sakura quickly moved her hands from his throat to his elbows and did something that was too advanced for a civilian to even know of. She popped them at a sixty degree angle, causing them to unlock and loosen his choke lock on her, and then she used her own force to propel him to the side in hopes of gaining the upper hand and become the one on top. She straddled him, his fingers were between her rib cage applying insane amounts of pressure and she was about to pop his Adams Apple with her own hands. He didn't want to break her ribs, but if she continued this – and that's what it took to stop her…he was going to.
She stopped applying pressure when someone called her name.
"Sakura Haruno!"
The pink haired medic weary dirty and blood-stained scrubs looked up at a very large breasted blonde woman who was staring down at them.
"Tsunade!" Sakura gasped pausing her attempt to kill a man. Itachi pushed her aside when her attention went elsewhere.
"Hah, used to pick fights with jocks in high school and now you pick fights with Wall Street guys?" her mentor said with a chuckle, "you haven't changed a bit."
Sakura looked at Itachi who was already standing up and she quickly jumped to her feet, feeling incredibly embarrassed.
"Pleasure to meet you Tsunade," he said calmly, "Itachi Uchihla."
"Oh, my…the eldest son of Fugaku…too bad I can't like you," she replied smiling as she shook his hand, "my little Sakura would like you to torture in the most colorful ways imaginable," she squeezed his hand painfully.
He squeezed back just as hard, "don't worry – the feeling is mutual."
"Heh, good sport aren't you?" Tsunade grinned, "We should go drinking some time!"
"Tsunade!" Sakura squeaked at the older woman.
"Yeah…yeah," Tsunade let go of Itachi's grip and opened and closed her hand repetitively trying to get the blood flowing back.
He kept his numb hand unmoved. He was good at not showing reactions to anything…that is, if you ignored the fact that he had just gotten into a brawl on the street with a girl.
"Excuse me, I have to go place some people into financially draining legal binds," Itachi said smiling as he fixed his tie and waved a lazy goodbye at the two females.
When Itachi turned to leave, Sakura jumped into her mentor's arms.
"I missed you so much!" the younger girl nearly shouted into tears.
"You know, he doesn't look like a mutated Frankenstein mixed with a disfigured Jekyll."
"I know, I said a disfigured Hyde, he was the evil personality, Jekyll was the nice one."
"Uh huh," Tsunade nodded as they broke their embrace, "I think you need an icepack – did you headbutt him?" she asked feeling around the shorter female's forehead.
"He said some really crappy things."
"Mmm, well I noticed that he was holding back in the fight…that style reminds me of that Chinese guy in the west….remember the one we went to see two years ago?"
"Psha, yeah right – stop giving him credit he probably doesn't deserve."
"Oh…yes, excuse me. I have no observational skills what so ever…right?" Tsunade asked sarcastically lifting an eyebrow, "come on, let me see your lab…and change your scrubs. Hello boys!" The blonde greeted the Paramedics who were still staring dumbfounded at the situation.
.
…
.
"ItachiiiiiiiiI! Guess –" Shisui stopped halfway into his cousin's office.
A list of thoughts ran through his head.
He had to have sex with Anko inside his office.
He had to have sex with Anko on a banana hammock.
He had to have sex with Anko inside a jail cell (again).
He had to go to confession.
He had to teepee his old football coach's house.
He had to run that marathon he always meant to.
All these 'had to' raced through his head because Itachi was in his office with an icepack on his jaw…and that could only mean one thing. The world was going to end. Really damn soon.
"What?" the injured man growled.
"You…did….oh my god, is some crazed psycho on the loose?"
Itachi found it ironic how close his cousin was to the truth.
"Who is it? A serial killer? Mass murderer? Foreign dictator? Terrorist?"
"Haruno," Itachi replied moving one of his case files to the side with his free hand.
"The barely five foot tall, hundred pound, pink haired doctor?" Shisui felt like he was about to self-combust with laughter.
Itachi didn't bother to respond to that.
"You know…if someone had to get punched by a saint, it would be you."
"She is far from saint-like."
"Yeah…saving bajillions of lives….so how'd you make her snap? Do your interrogatory mind tricks?"
"Shisui…for once…can you just shut up?"
"Hell no, Maria comes home and cries a storm, Anko tries killing her, and all I get is that some pink haired slut was all over 'her' man and that somehow translates to her needing new boobs…or something. I have had no sex for thirty hours! And now you…you got hit in the face. Dude, the last time you got hit… you killed the guy."
Itachi wished he could kill Shisui at that moment.
"So…did you tap that ass and say something wildly inappropriate the morning after?"
"There was no ass tapping. She decided to…do whatever it is Maria told you for some irrationally stupid reason and I decided to tell the entire hospital where she works that she has crabs, and a thing for old men and ….and then she retaliated with violence," Itachi deadpanned.
"There…are so many things wrong with you…I don't think I could make a list – I'd feel bad for the forest that'd be chopped down for the paper…"
"I told you what happened, now stop being annoying."
"No problem, bro – anyone asks I'll just say you fell down the stairs – that's the excuse those battered wives use right?" Shisui quickly corrected himself as he felt the threatening aura radiate off Itachi, "kidding, kidding – okay, we did some morning boxing and I decked you…or some golden glove winner decked you…some super duper martial artsy black ops secret service guy decked you? Right…right."
The air stilled and Shisui felt the urge to hum the twilight theme song.
Itachi slammed the icepack on the desk, but otherwise remained silent. The older Uchiha wondered if it was safe to leave.
It wasn't.
A/N: Your reviews just bring me to my knees in joy :). Thank you so much. I hope everyone is happy with the quick update! Annnnnnd enjoyed this chapter. Let me know what you think!
Who do you think was the winner this round? ;)