"Heyy, Dibb. :)" Aki's sister said, prancing up to him at the end of school. "I couldn't help but notice your slight hostility towards me and my brother. I think we might've-how would you say it? -gotten off on the wrong foot."

Dib glared at her. "YOU CAME INTO THE CLASSROOM AND STARTED ACUSING ME OF BEING GAY!"

She giggled. "Yes, well... I sincerely apologize."

He raised an eyebrow. "You don't feel even a little sorry do you?"

"Nope! ^-^" She shook her head. "But... I don't want to ruin a marvelous friend opportunity for my brother. Maybe you might want to hang out with us today?"

"Forget it. He wants my job. And besides, I have to study..."

"Liar!" She said in sing-song.

Just then Gaz walked up. She grabbed Dib's arm. "We're going."

"Ooh. Who is this?" Aki's sister asked.

"This is my little sister, Gaz." Dib said. "And she seems pretty pissed off so I think I'm just gonna go with her."

"Aww! Cut little uke getting pushed around by his little sister! ^-^"

"Please?" Aki begged Zim as they were walking to the bus.

"No." Zim responded.

"Please?"

"No."

"Please?"

"GIR!"

"Yes, my Lord!" Gir said, saluting.

"HE'S SO CUTE!" A bunch of girls squealed.

"Get on the bus and stop picking gum off the bottom of the bench." Zim said.

"Awwwwwwwwww. But I'z already collected 234 pieces!" Gir shoved a few into his mouth as he said so and swallowed them.

"Gir! What are you doing swallowing all that gum?" Zim scolded.

"Saving it for later..." Gir said.

Zim smacked his forehead. "It doesn't work like that Gir! How many times do I have to tell you?"

Gir blinked. "Ooh! A squirrel!"

"Get on the bus Gir." Zim said. He pushed him roughly forward.

"Zim..." Aki said. "Would you go to the ice cream shop if... if I said Dib was going to meet us there?"

Zim looked back at him. "Please! Why would the presence of the Dib Beast sway my decision? You obviously don't know me very well."

"Oh. Ok, then." Aki said. "I apologize. I'll just go with Dib and my sister then and... I'll see you tomorrow."

-Later at Dib's house-

"What the hell is a uke?" Dib muttered as he made an attempt at his math homework. He grabbed his non-work-related laptop and booted it up. "And why would that girl call me it? It must be Japanese or something, but... Oh! Here it is! Uke..." His eyes widened. "No... How could she do this to me?"

-At Zim's-

"My tummy hurts..." Gir said. He lied moping on the couch. "I know! Let's make waffles!" He tried to hop up, but his stomach only hurt more. He groaned in pain. "Owwy."

"I TOLD YOU!" Zim hollered. "YOUR STOMACH AND HEAD CAN NO LONGER BE USED AS VASTLESS CARRYING DEVICES! The things and amount you eat will now take a toll on your body."

"Aww... but I ordered Chinese." Gir pouted.

"I will simply have to..." Zim cut himself short. "What are you doing?"

Gir frowned. "Being sad cuz you won't let me eat my Chinese."

"The facial expression..." Zim mused. "How very... HUMAN!"

Gir reached down and picked up his old dog costume. "Ziiiim... Will yous make me another one?" He held it up to him hopefully.

Zim smacked it out of his hand. "No Gir! You're supposed to be human now!"

"But I loooves it!" Gir picked it back up sadly.

"Stay here and don't destroy anything." Zim commanded. "I'm going out."

"Okey-dokey!" Gir said with a bright smile.

As soon as Zim was gone, Aki's sister knocked on the door. Gir got up and answered it. "Hello?"

She waltzed in immediately. "You really are as cute as they say." She smiled brightly. "You want your puppy suit back and I want some information. Can we negotiate a trade?"

"You gots some taquitos?" Gir wondered.

"Of course." She pulled out a hot platter of them from the bag she held.

"Woohoo!" Gir exclaimed. He tried to hop up and his stomach throbbed. "My tummy hurts..."

"Oh. Poor thing." She muttered. She brought out some medicine. "Drink this and in a few minutes you'll feel better."

Gir gulped it down. He looked back up at Aki's sister. "So, whachu want?"

"Has Zim done anything... weird to you yet?" She asked.

"Nope!" Gir said. "Just Zim being Zim!"

"Does Zim have tentacles?"

"No."

"How often would you say Dib comes over?"

"Well before he went all weird, everyday!" Gir said. He sat up. "Taquitos?"

Aki's sister handed them to him. "Oh really?"

"Mmhmm!" Gir said. He began to devour the taquitos. "Zim even captured him to do experiments!"

She smiled widely. "Now that sounds like something I want to hear about."

"Hey, Dib?" Gaz asked. Her gaze was averted. "You're kind of a... guy, right?"

"Not now Gaz!" Dib said. "I have to go get a girlfriend!"

"A... girlfriend?" Gaz asked. "You couldn't get a girlfriend if your life depended on it."

"But I have to! If I don't, then Aki's sister will think I'm... I'm gay!"

"Who's this 'Aki' you keep talking about?" Gaz asked.

"The new foreign exchange student! And he has a diabolical, yaoi-obsessed sister!" Dib exclaimed. "And I can't take it!"

"We got a foreign exchange student too. You know, other than Gir..."

"That's nice." Dib said. "Now, are you gonna help me get a girlfriend, or are you going to leave me to my fate?"

"What's the big deal about some girl calling you gay anyway? It's not like anyone'll pay attention to her."

"Of course they will!" Dib grabbed his wallet, shoving it into his pocket. "So are you helping me or what?"

"I'll go with or what." Gaz rolled her eyes. "Have fun being humiliated."

"Fine then! If I must do this by myself, then I will!" Dib rushed out the door.

"Damn it!" Zim muttered. "The Earth scum lied to me! The Dib Beast is not here." Zim shoved his hands into his pockets. "Now what? I can't go home unsuccessful!"

"Out of my way!" It was Dib. He was running frantically, shoving people out of his way, as he was chased by an enraged female.

"What luck!" Zim said with a smile. He leaned against a wall nonchalantly and stuck out his foot.

"AHH!" Dib caught his foot on Zim's and toppled over.

"It looks big does it?" The girl cried. "Oh I'll show you big!"

She grabbed him by the collar and began mercilessly beating him. Zim flinched and looked away. Three good punches, and she left. Dib sat there covering his face. Zim snorted laughter.

"It can't be that bad. She's only a pathetic human." Zim said. "Move your hands."

Dib did so and Zim had to wince. Dib had acquired a split lip, a bloody nose and a black eye. His glasses were broken on the ground. "Yeah..." Dib grimaced. "Just a... girl."

Zim laughed. "Well, Dib, I believe you've been beaten by a girl."

Dib wiped the blood from under his nose. "Shut up, Zim."

Dib stood up and began walking away. Just then, Aki's sister appeared out of the crowd. "Dib! D: Are you ok?"

Dib frowned. "Leave me alone."

"Nonsense!" She brought out a handkerchief and began to wipe away more blood. "Here."

"Thanks..." Dib said. "What was your name, anyway?"

"Oh. It's ***! :)" She said brightly.

Dib's eyes were wide. "HOW DID YOU DO THAT?"

"Oh! It's censored content. All Japanese people can do it." She said. "My brother didn't tell you my name, so neither can I. :)"

"How does that make any sense?" Dib asked.

"It doesn't." She said with a shrug. "It just is." She took his arm. "How about you come home with me. We'll get you fixed up."

"But you're the one who put me in this mess!" Dib said.

"Dib, I didn't punch you in the face." Aki's sister said.

"No, but I have to prove to you I'm not gay!" Dib said. "And I guess girls don't take that as a compliment..."

"What did you do?" She asked. She giggled.

"Well..."

"Emoticon girl!" Zim shouted. "Release the Dib Beast immediately."

"Oh? Are you jealous?" Aki's sister asked. She smiled slyly.

"Jealous? Never. For no one is better than INVADER ZIM!" Zim laughed.

"Well then you shouldn't mind." Aki's sister said. "Nice talking to you, Slim. :)"

She began walking away. Dib raised his eyebrows. "Is it just me, or was she just rude to you?"

"Just you." Zim said.

"I see..." Dib held in a smile.

"You're not off the hook." Aki's sister growled. She grabbed Dib by the arm and dragged him away.