It took me so long to write this so I hope it meets expectations :)

xxx

I woke up to a touch as light as feathers caressing my hand. My heart began to beat it all just been a dream? Was Alice really here? Alive?

I opened my eyes and bolted upright. An anguished cry rang through the ward and I couldn't understand where it was coming from. I felt cool hands place themselves on my cheeks and Mirana's beautiful face hover in front of mine; whispering comforting things and I realized it was me.

I felt myself fall even deeper into the pit of pain as I recalled everything that had happened last night. Was it last night? How long had I been asleep for? How long had Alice been missing? Why was I even still alive?

I laid still on the bed as my rasping breath calmed down and I tried to ignore the burning pain in my stomach. I daren't look down to see the damage that had been done, but by the way Mirana held herself away from my body, I guessed there was a lot of blood.

"Where's Alice?" I forced out, grimaced in agony as the small movement jostled my body.

Mirana looked desperately at me. She was a queen and had to be strong for her people, but even a queen couldn't keep her feelings at bay all the time. I had never seen her cry, not even in the most foul of times, so to see a tear roll solely down her cheek, emptied me completely.

"Please, try and rest my Hatter." She soothed. Her voice caught once.

I had no energy left to be angry, so I had to plead with my eyes.

"Please. Mirana. Where is she?"

She shook her head and closed her dark eyes. Another tear escaped and fell to the white marble floor. The room was so quiet, the splash sounded a thousand times louder than it should have.

"I don't know." she whispered.

Her words hung in the air between us and the silence pressed disturbingly against my ears.

"By the time the March Hare found you, Alice was long gone." Her voice shook.

I felt a burst of anger erupt through my body. Alice was gone…and it was my entire fault. I was too weak to protect her; too stupid that I let my guard down when I needed it the most.

I tried to sit up again and gasped quietly as the burn increased in my body.

"Tarrant, no. Please, lay down. You'll hurt yourself more!"

I scoffed.

"I deserve every bit of pain I receive. This is all my fault. You warned us! You said she would be too weak to defend herself and I just left her, unprotected and now, she's in the hands of some…some slurvish slurking urpal slackush guddler! And I swear, I will make him pay, I will drive a sword through his chest, and he will regret the day her ever took my Alice from me!"

Mirana had been calling my name in an attempt to bring me out of my episode of rage, but nothing could calm me now. It was rare that I ever got unable to calm my emotions, since Alice had returned, but when my outbursts occasionally did happen, she was always the one to bring me back to earth.

"I should end my life now for being so pathetic. Unable to save her, my eternal love." I felt the heat leave my body and sadness take over.

"Don't speak like that Tarrant! Ever! This is something you cannot take the blame for."

I didn't reply. Instead my thought drifted back to that night, the best night of my life, and also the worst. I thought of all the dresses waiting to be worn in my workroom. They were all glorious articles that voiced my love for Alice. Now they were just unhelpful reminders of what I lost.

"I asked her to marry me, you know." My eyes were unfocused and my head was bowed.

"She said yes," I smiled slightly, "after we had made love. She was going to make me the happiest man alive."

I heard the Queen inhale slowly, and then let it out in a sigh.

"And she still will." She said confidently. "We still have hope Tarrant. It's hasn't even been a week." She moved closer to me, our head were almost touching. "Circumstances though impossible as they might seem, lead you two find each other. You've been given the chance of love. Don't go casting it away, my friend. It is a gift and many may not experience it in their entire lifetime." She looked down sadly. "However much they might wish for it."

I looked at her sinking features. She was right. What I had with Alice was special and I was about to give up on her. Miranas' words seemed to clear my head and I knew what I was to do. I would search for Alice and fight for her until my heart stopped beating. If it took me 50 years, I would do it. I would fight with time again to ensure she was returned home safely. I would prove my muchness.

"There's still time, your Majesty. Love sometimes appears in the strangest of places. But you will find it. You are too wonderful to live your life with no-one to share it with."

She smiled.

"You're a good man Tarrant Hightopp. You deserve nothing less than the champion of Underland."

It was silent for another moment.

"So when can I be out of here? Soon, I hope."

"I've already sent a search party, they should be returning any day now." She answered my unspoken question. "And you have another day of bed rest before the potion I gave you fully sorts your body out."

How much time had actually passed without me? I really needed to improve my relationship with it because this was simply not convenient.

"How long has she…" I swallowed. "Have I been unconscious for?"

I couldn't bring myself to think about how long Alice had been… away from me. I knew that until the moment she was safely in my arms again, I would be paranoid and fearful for her.

"Five days now. You're lucky to still be alive. It was a good job I'd just perfected my elixir of life. It can't bring things back to life, but as long as the heart is beating, it can heal almost any injury. You were hanging in there, for Alice."

"Now she has to hang in there for me. When I'm recovered, I'll search the lands. I won't rest until I've found her. I swear."

But it didn't happen like that. Mirana allowed me to form a search party, but I was to return within two weeks of departure. We found nothing and I felt my days become darker and my anger less easy to control. Whenever I heard someone say her name, I would corner them and demand to know what they knew about her.

Days turned into weeks, weeks into months, and we still had nothing on the whereabouts of my lost love. Mirana had sent out search party after search party. They looked high, low and in every crevice there was, but they never came back to the caste with my blonde haired angel. I had tried to escape from the castle of numerous occasions and search on my own again, but I never got past the pink wilting trees that hadn't stopped mourning since Alice had first been declared missing. I knew if I did leave, I would not be successful and I repeated the words "naught for usal" over and over again to numerous search parties, but it didn't stop me from trying to escape and search on my own. Mirana had said she was concerned for my well-being and I was to be kept under the confines of the castle until I got my head straight again.

Everyone was angst ridden, but no-one was worse than me. I could see it in the way they looked at me. Their eyes pitying, but they kept themselves a good distance from me as if they feared the pent up anger I held inside of me would be unleashed on them. They all knew of the engagement and our other activities that night, but only through gossip which over time had propelled the rumors far from the truth. They knew what I had lost and knew how easily I could loose I could loose my head, if you pardon the phrase.

Sometimes, I thought they were being over reactive. Yet every time I crossed a reflective surface, I knew I would have been the same, had some other person looked as I did. My reflection told no lies and I knew what to expect, but every time I looked into a mirror, I couldn't stop the horror that spread through my body, singing like the bite of the Jubjub Bird. My hair, previously long and cared for, had been hacked shorter by my own hands, during a fit of rage. The flowing locks had reminded me too much of her. My face had regained the chalky white complex I had when Alice returned to slay the Jabberwocky. It had been almost a normal shade of pale before Alice had been taken, now, as the happiness had been drained from me, so did my colour, my sanity, my muchness. The smudged dashes of colour around my yellow/brown eyes and on my cheeks were nothing more than unhelpful reminders of the joy that was once the centre of my life.

I slumped onto the floor in my chamber in the castle and sighed. It had been three months since my fiancé had last been seen and I had admitted to myself that there was no hope left. I had stopped trying to escape when the 19th party had returned, one of the men dead and the others battered with no prize in their midst. A total of seven creatures had been killed

When I felt an odd tingle run throughout my body. It was neither good nor bad, but like a small static stock that pricks every nerve and propels you into a new realm of awareness.

I felt my head clear for the first time in months and I knew it had something to do with Alice. Something had happened to her. A surge of power, a strong substance or something immense had entered her body and our connection let me feel it.

Whatever it was, I was grateful for, because as I raced through the deserted corridors of Marmoreal, I caught the reflection of something bright, sparking and an unmistakable shade of green staring back at me.

I laughed like a mad man as I burst through the solid wooden doors to the Queen's throne room.

"She's alive!" I cried out and ran to my queen, grabbing her body and pulling it close to mine. I made sure her ear was close to my mouth as I whispered into her ear. "Something's happened to her. I felt it. A force entered her. Whoever has her, I think they're using her for something bigger."

I felt Miranas' body mechanically shiver.

"Like a weapon." She whispered back.

Celebrations rang around us, but in our own bubble, Mirana and I knew things were just the same, if not worse.

"Alice is powerful. She could do great damage if she is in the wrong hands."

"Then we must find her." I whispered strongly.

She began to protest, but I cut her off.

"Look at my eyes. Look at me. I can do this. I need to do this. These past few months, I've been appalling and if I could I would take everything back. Alice could have been home by now. Please your Majesty let me prove my muchness again."

My voice had risen and we were looking at each others face, but the spectators remained blissfully unaware of our conversation, all too overjoyed that their champion was still alive.

She sighed.

"I want her to be safe Tarrant. More than you think. I owe my kingdom to that woman." She sighed. "But it's been three months. I can't believe that there is a place she is that we haven't looked. It'll be impossible."

I thought for a moment as the word impossible rang through my mind.

"Only if you believe it is… Sometimes, I think of six impossible things before breakfast."

"Alice told me she did that too."

"Where do you think I learnt it from."

She sighed and closed her eyes. She stood perfectly still, her perfect body not swaying an inch. The Queens subjects had settled down and were gazing at their majesty with looks of confusion on their faces. Those who couldn't see her neutral expression and odd stillness, looked with anticipation at her back, expecting her to make a grand speech about how we were to proceed now we had regained some hope.

After several minutes, she opened her eyes and her green met brown. There was a new determination in her eyes that was not the gentle, delicate spark she always had.

"We need our champion. And this time, I'm going to help her. I do have a debt that needs repaying."

She spoke loud enough that the small crowd heard her. Gasps echoed around the hall and one lady even fainted.

A round of; "but your highness…" "It's too dangerous for…" "What about the castle…" and "won't be safe…" rang around us until Mirana held up her hand in a 'silence' gesture.

"Alice is my dear friend. She has served us all by slaying the Jabberwocky and ending my sister reign of terror. She has sacrificed more than you know by living here and I will not let her sacrifices go in vain. She deserves so much and I have done nothing for her. Well that changes now. From this second, I declare Alice Kingsley 'Lady of Underland'.

I have sat my idly while people have looked all over the kingdom for her and done little to acquire her return myself. I will do this no longer. I've always enjoyed being involved in my kingdom and in the lives of its residents, yet whenever there is danger involved, I have always stepped aside and allowed other to risk their lives. But not any more. I will stay true to my vows; never, will I harm another living creature, but that does not mean I can't help find our champion.

We will be leaving tomorrow at dawn. Ready half a dozen troops and send out the word. Tomorrow, we are bringing our champion home."

Everyone had gathered and she had turned her back to me while addressing them all. They quickly dispatched and the queen, her majesty and my good friend turned to me.

"You're coming." I said quietly.

"Yes. She has been much like a best friend this last year. However many time I have asked her to call me Mirana." She laughed softy. "And I owe her so much, but doing this seems like a good start."

I nodded. Since Mirana's speech, a foreboding sensation had spread slowly through my body. My heart prickled and I nervously scratched my neck.

"I'll go…pack then." I said "Long day tomorrow. Need my sleep too."

I ran out of the hall, shaking my head at the blatant lie. I had not slept since I had woken up in the white infirmary ward. The smudged pink under my eyes was enough to cover the dark circles there, but inside, I felt like collapsing.

When I got back to my chamber, I locked the door and stuffed the necessary possessions into a sturdy bag. I threw the bag onto the floor, turned around and almost jumped out of my skin. Chessur sat on my bed, purring and gazing up at me with that gigantic smile on his face.

"I heard Alice is still alive." He evaporated and appeared in front of me, lazing idly in the air.

"What do you want Chess? I need to get to bed." I asked tiredly, not wanting to put up with any of his pointless drivel tonight.

"Ooh, someone not had their rainbow cake in a while." He jibed.

I growled and I knew my eyes were turning golden.

"She was always so kind to me. I want to help bring her back." He said quickly.

I smirked. "Chessur wants to do an act of kindness. How peculiar. Or do you expect something in return you frumious, slurvish cat."

"Hey! I am neither filthy nor do I smell!"

"But you are selfish and self centered." I countered.

"Well I'm trying not to be." He raised his voice. "Let me come with you and find Alice. I want to help. Please Hatter." His eyes went wide and I sighed, annoyed.

"Fine! You can come. Just let me get some sleep."

He laughed sarcastically. "Don't be dense Hatter. You haven't slept in months. Not since she was taken. And you won't sleep until she's lying next to you again."

My eyes narrowed.

"How would you know?"

He laughed warmly. "Because I know everything."

His voice faded into a whisper, just like his body did.

"Goodnight Hatter." His voice said before I felt a presence leave the room.

I grumbled to myself as I took of my clothes about how I would prove Chessur wrong, and then, I did something I hadn't done in three months. I collapsed on my bed and went to sleep, feeling slightly better than I had done in months.

Sorry it's so long :s

I hope it was worth the wait. Next chapter is back to Alice and Stayne.

xxx