Chapter 2- Angry Sex

There is a beautiful hill on the Hogwarts campus that few know about. Its almost always quiet, serene, and just the perfect place for Lily to do Charms homework. If by "do Charms homework," the narrator means "think, cry, and dream."

No, she was not leaning up against the trunk of a majestic tree and writing in a leather-bound journal while wearing her most delicate, white, lacy, and free-flowing dress she owned as you are imagining right now. That is a stereotype that Lily chose to avoid.

Lily's hill does, however, have wonderful grass. It's not something people really think about, but when you find a patch of grass that is absolutely perfect and free of any annoyances, you love it. Lily's hill is one giant patch of that exact sort of grass. It was a source of great comfort for her, and she visited almost everyday.

Every time Lily walked up to this hill, she always had a vivid imagine of two slender bodies, naked as worms, arching, grabbing, sweating, and screaming atop the perfect grass on her hill.

That day, St.Valentine's Day eve, Lily walked up her hill to the summit and plopped herself down. It was about two in the afternoon, a little cloudy and chilly. She was in her usual clothes: robes, pleated skirt (that she liked to roll down on the top sometimes, just for fun), knee-highs, sweater, and a tie. She laid on her back to stare at the gray clouds. Despite their moody color, they were cute.

I need to let this go. I need to let this go. I need to let this go.

She rolled onto her stomach and placed her face on the welcoming grass.

I just...

She turned her head to the other side.

He told me he loved me.

A familiar set of Griffindor robes flew by.

I should have guessed.

Lily sat upright and watched James Potter make a circle on his broomstick around her sorry self. It had been a year since he had been to her hill. He landed a few feet in front of her and dismounted his broom, tossing it to the side. His face was like stone. There was a light breeze that moved his jet-black hair and her violent-red. It was the only sound heard.

Lily stood up, expecting him to explain himself. "Well?" she asked, impatient.

His answer was immediate:

"When I told you I loved you, I did not lie."

Her brain couldn't process this. All she could muster up was a weak, "James, I..." Lily had been suppressing these memories for a year, these stinging, scaring, bleeding memories that he had just spoken to her. They were seeping out her eyes now, drowning in hot tears. She could not control the horrible visions flashing in her head of James standing over her.

"If you love me James, you would wait until I'm ready for this..."

"You're ready, come on..."

"Please, James, no-"

"Lily! You told me you wanted it..."

"I... I just... fine."

He didn't seem to notice how upset she was. "I know things sort of happened fast... and ended fast-"

"James." Lily had had this burning idea in her mind for so long. She didn't know if she had the power in her to finally tell him, but she knew she had to. "I hate you. I hate you for not listening to me, I hate you for abusing me, I hate you for using me, I hate you for everything!"

Sadness and loss had enveloped her, and she was shaking. James' handsome face fell. He quickly went over to hold her. "Lily, don't cry..." Lily's soft hands desperately grabbed the body she knew every toned inch of, deepening the penetration of her memories.

But she knew she couldn't just cry in his arms- she had to finish. She pushed him away.

"Hey, Lily, I'm sorry!" He complained.

Lily wiped her eyes and took a deep breath to regain her composure. She wasn't upset anymore.

"James, you have done God-awful things to me... Everyday I see you, and I remember, still. I remember everything. Even though it may be a little painful to think about... James, I..." She realized that she was beginning to feel embarrassed, but she snapped out of it. "James," she restarted. Then she faltered again, still feeling stupid. "James!" was all she could say. She began to laugh at how bizarre she sounded. Laughing about what had happened between them was the only way she could by without going completely shutting down, anyway. James was confused, but laughed.

"Lily, Lily!" he chuckled. "What are you trying to say?!"

Lily had had this sentence in her head for so long, but had never spoken it aloud. She was now realizing how crazy it sounded. But she knew she absolutely had to tell him. She took a deep breath, made herself look as confident as possible (maybe a little too confident... hands on her hips, chin up high, and this ridiculous voice), and finally said it.

"James Michael Potter, I want to have very angry, bitter, and crazy sex with you. Right here."

What in bloody hell did I just do?

A grin stretched across his face. "I thought you'd never ask."

She knew he would say something like that. She chuckled and said, "I'm serious, Potter. It may seem ridiculous, but I... well, a lot of things have changed since we were together. I just..." She looked down at the perfect grass for comfort.

James laughed. "You just what?"

"I can't get the image of your naked body out of my head!" It felt so good to scream such obscene and ridiculous things that she had bottled up in her body- things she hadn't even told Brianne.

"Well, Lily, what can I say... I'm just so..." He ran a hand through his suave hair.

"Hot? I know. Please, James, I know... Just say yes."

"Seriously?"

Lily blinked. "Ok, ok maybe sex is a little much. But..."

"Yes, please... Lily," He took a step forward to put his hand on her arm. "I've been dying to fool around with you again. That's why I'm here."

She smiled, even though that seemed a little strange. "Well then, it's settled?" She looked up into his sincere eyes.

James pulled her close. He smelled like he had been flying. "Tomorrow, Lily. It's Valentine's Day tomorrow!"

"It's a date," Lily smiled.