You Know You're In Band If.../A Survival Guide to Marching Band
What happens in marching band, stays in marching band.
More accurately, what happens in the drumline, stays in the drumline.
Don't be surprised if some guy on pit or drumline is running down the band hallway yelling "I CAN'T FIND MY STICKS!!!!"
It's natural seeing a girl running down the band hall yelling if someone has a tampon, but forgets that the band office is stocked with them.
There are too many jokes about the pit's "ball-sticks" that are played on vibes.
You make fun of info-mercials.
You make fun of those silly commercials on T.V. (Shout-out to Laura: BUMP ITS! SHAMWOW!)
Never invade another section's water break area to try and claim as your own section's. Then you have a band war on your hands.
You love the chaperones because they give you free sugar and water on bus rides. (BAD IDEA on sugar but who cares?)
It's scary watching the trumpets doing a grind line.
It's horrifying when the whole brass line's is pretty much doing a grind line.
You laugh because now the whole friking band is doing it.
If the trumpets can make your lead band director join in, then take pictures. Or run for your life. Take your pick.
Tenor saxophones always get confused with the quads or "tenors" and are usually forgotten. (Example-assistant director is asking most of the woodwinds to play a certain part and he calls off "Okay clarinets, flutes, and altos play measure so-and so." Tenor sax senior says "Uh sir you forgot we play that too!" Director replies "Oh yeah you guys too.")
If you're ever in jazz band, NEVER believe that the director's "good" idea is good because it's going to involve chaos. (For instance my jazz band's playing Feelin' the Funk as our finale and half the song brass and extra basses don't play so the director is letting them dance in the crowd. SO NOT A GOOD IDEA!!! As soon as he said it he looked up and said "God what have I done?? I've unleashed the brass!" lolz love you guys!)
Sectionals is where everything gets done, but at the same time it's just a place where you can goof off.
You learn to sleep standing up on command, or on other people or on desks pushed together.
Hackeysack is the name of the game. The saxophones always get blamed if anything gets broken, even if a trumpet, mello, or tuba did it.
Monsters and skittles are the number one things that are eaten by tubas, although they're hyper as it is without it.
You cry at the senior's last competiton. And their graduation.
Freshmen are freshies and sophomores are softies, but sophomores don't like them being called softies by the freshies.
You laugh at the hardest set where you have to watch a trombone lifting their whole horn above a baritone's head, even though you feel sorry.
When someone falls, you ask if they're okay. If they are, laugh, THEN help them up.
The most awkward thing is when you're dating someone in your own section and then you break up.
There is always a fight which drum core is the best. (Cavaliers sorry it's true!)
It's super awkward when you're hosting a competiton and you have to help the guard out, but one of them is a guy.
You appreciate if you're not in guard when you have to help that guest guard take the flags back to their trailer.
NINJA! is amazing. If you disagree, the rest of the band is after you. (The object of the game is to hold a ninja posistion until a) it's your turn or b) someone is about to hit you. then you make your move or move your hands out of the way. if you slap another person's hands, you win. If they hit your hands, you lose.)
When a guard asks you to help tease their hair, it is deadly work.
Girl freshies freak out when they first put the shakos on becuase some people (like me) have really thick hair.
If you've come close to passing out, then you were putting enough effort in without killing yourself.
You hate doing your drills inside because the floor seems to be waxed every other day.
You march in rain, snow, wind, heat, and cold, but you only worry what it's going to do to your instrument.
If the pit starts worrying about their instruments, then it's pretty serious weather.
It is a rare yet awesome omen if the "band gods" give you ten minutes of pouring rain in the middle of July camp.
Another favorite memory of your marching season was right before a big competition, at the climax of your ballad, the band gods give you a shiny sun on an overcast day, then go back to clouds when Act III begins.
When you only have a minute left to get to class, you don't run. You jazz run.
Tenor and baritone saxophones always have to worry at set while marching because when you're in a tight formation, your instrument can get easily hit.
If you've ever seen a bari and tenor sax run back to their sets, hit each other and their instruments, then crash to the ground, you know that we (I mean they! I was the tenor that hit the bari senior) were running pretty fast.
It's a miracle if your instrument gets saved when you fall/crash, but you only have damage.
Marching band is a corrupting influence on your mind. Even the most innocent little freshie can be corrupted. (Shout-out to Mam'zelleCombeferre! Thanks!)
When the drumline play their cadence at the end of the day, the rest of the band walk/march/fish in time back inside until the song is done.
You love the levy-lift when it's down at water break because it provides shade and a seat for the smart people rather than share a tree for shade with the rest of the tubas and woodwinds.
You realize which freshmen either enjoy marching band or aren't weak when instrument appreciation day comes around. (Baritones switch with trumpets, flutes with clarinets, etc., during block.)
You also know which ones aren't wimps if they complain or not.
If a bet in band camp involves monkey humps, don't accept the bet.
Avert your eyes girls if you ever see a guy doing a monkey hump. It's weird and wrong on so many levels.
There are way too many "Your MOM!", "In My Pants", and "That's What She Said (TWSS)!" jokes in marching band.