I wish I did.
I wish I lived.
I wish I cried more.
I wish I loved more.
I wish I spoke more.
I wish I would have let Tina be with Artie.
They were always meant to be.
I wonder if God gave me someone.
Someone that was meant to be.
Or anyone else that would die.
I wish I would have been strong enough to live without her.
I wish I would have been a better boyfriend.
If I was I would have been on time to our date tonight.
I wouldn't have had to rush.
I would've paid attention.
I wouldn't have run that red light.
I wouldn't have gotten into a car crash.
I would've lived.
But I'm a bad boyfriend.
So I won't.
Did you think about him Tina?
Did you secretly want to be with him?
You could've if you wanted to.
Now I guess you can.
Don't move on to fast though ok?
Mourn me for just a little.
I dated Brittney too.
I've only had two girlfriends.
Tina and….. Brittney.
I was allowed to be a bad boyfriend.
Brittney was so innocent and naïve that she wouldn't have known any better.
I'm sorry I'm abandoning everyone.
I'm sorry I was invisible.
I'm sorry you were abandoned Rachel.
I'm sorry you had a Diva fit.
I'm sorry everyone thought you were invisible.
You didn't let yourself be invisible.
You fought so hard for the spotlight.
I'm sorry you want everything so bad.
I'm sorry Glee Club abandoned you.
I'm sorry your fathers did to.
I'm sorry they got up left, leaving everything behind.
I'm sorry they left you behind to.
I'm sorry you took a handful of their pills.
Did you know it would kill you?
We abandoned you.
So you had no one to write a suicide note to.
You could've written me one.
If you wanted to.
But you didn't.
So I guess I'll never really know if you wanted to die.
I wonder if you would've come to my funeral.
Even though I didn't go to yours.
I wonder if anyone will come.
I wonder if Tina will cry.
I wonder if Artie will comfort her.
I wonder if they will sing.
I wonder what song.
I'm sorry I wasn't good enough.
I'm sorry that because I wasn't good enough, you will have to learn to live without me.
I'm sorry the world will have to learn to live without me.
Blood is seeping into my eyes, forcing them to close.
I'm crying.
No one ever got the chance to know me.
I never gave them the chance.
If I could go back.
People would know me.
I would've let Tina be with Artie.
I would've learned to live without her.
Because she's going to learn to live without me.
If I could go back.
Rachel would be alive.
But I can't.
So Rachel will still be dead.
So I'm still invisible.
And I'm still alone.