It's funny how things become so unimportant.
Certain things don't even matter anymore.
Now that I'm here.
Now that I'm dying.
If I had the strength to clean up this mess, I would.
This mess.
It's funny how this is now a mess.
It's a mess and not my blood.
I wish I wasn't so cautious.
I wish I would've taken a chance.
Taken a chance on Will.
If I had, I wouldn't be here.
If I had I wouldn't have dated Carl.
I wouldn't have tried to correct him on his cleaning abilities.
He wouldn't have beaten me.
Beat me until I bled.
Beat me until I'm a mess.
But that's what I really am.
A mess.
Will.
Was I really a mess?
Was I a mess to you?
I guess so.
I guess that's why you suggested a therapist.
I'm not mad at you for sleeping around.
Even though I never did.
I never really did sleep around.
I never really slept at all.
But that's okay.
Because I love you.
So I'm going to forget what you did.
Don't forget me okay?
Don't forget us.
Sue.
I will think fondly of you in heaven.
I know you said you don't believe in it.
But I will put in a good word for you.
Don't destroy glee club anymore, okay?
You've won.
You won that battle when you gave Glee Club another year.
Thanks for sticking up for me.
For being my therapist.
I really will Sue.
I'll make sure you one day walk through the gates of heaven.
I won't forget Sue.
You may not believe in heaven.
But you can believe in me.
You were always so small Rachel.
Always so, so, so small.
You may not have been as thin as Quinn.
But you were a much better person.
When you asked me if I have ever cried over a boy.
I'm sorry I lied.
Maybe, just maybe.
If you felt like someone understood you.
Maybe you wouldn't have.
Maybe you wouldn't have become bulimic.
Maybe you wouldn't have died.
I'm sorry I lied.
I'm sorry I couldn't be there to help.
When you really needed it.
How did this happen?
How did I end up here?
Beaten to death.
Beaten because I didn't take a chance.
Maybe I am a freak.
Maybe I would've fit right into Glee Club.
If they would've let me.
If I would've asked.
But I didn't so now.
Someone is going to have to clean up my mess.
Someone is going to clean up me.
Someone is going to clean up the mess that I truly am.