Translation Note: "Koujo-sama," Kouran's nickname, is a play on the word "Oujo," which means "Imperial Princess." It's a teasing name that Houjun and Hikou use whenever she's being particularly bossy. ~_^
"It's like somebody launched a missile
The day that everything ends
Is anxiously being brought about.
What could this feeling be?
Is it something bad or is this normal?
By myself, I don't understand any of it! Somebody explain it to me!"
~"Tenchi in Tokyo" Opening Theme;
"Yume wa Doko e Itta?" (Where Did The Dream Go?)~
Houjun stared hard at the young teacher, mahogany eyes blinking in disbelief. How could it be her!? How could she be here!? The only place she could possibly exist was in his mind, within the stress-induced visions of his own design. She couldn't be real, otherwise everything else he had pictured had the potential to be real, had the potential to come true...
And that meant...
The woman smiled, nodding towards Wei-sensei and Headmaster Ryuichi. "Ah, Ryuichi-sensei, thank you for showing me to my temporary classroom. I believe that I can take it from here."
The older man nodded, turning to fire his icy glare upon the classroom one last time. "I expect to hear only good things from Tenshuru-sensei. A bad report on a first day is most embarassing for a class, and for a school."
Everyone in the room nodded, flashing their most angelic smiles. They all knew that what Ryuichi really meant was that a bad report looked bad for him, and anyone who screwed up his reputation would very quickly discover a hell on earth. "Hai, Ryuichi-sensei!" the group, except for Houjun, chimed as one.
Tenshuru Asashi waited until the door closed, then flashed another mysterious smile to the group of teenagers. "Phew, am I glad he's gone. I don't know about the rest of you, but that man gives me the creeps. I'm afraid that if I breathe wrong he'll fire me." Her remark earned scattered chuckles and more than a few winces; the headmaster was, after all, famous for his harsh punishments.
Asashi pulled the teacher's chair out from behind her desk, taking a delicate seat in front of the class. She smiled again, though this time it was a small, embarassed smile. "To be honest, I shouldn't be in here. I specialize in music, but Ryuichi-sensei insisted that, before I take up at residence at the University, I should learn the basics of teaching." Several students whistled at her remark. Kyokujitsu's only claim to fame was the small Music and Arts University next to the secondary school; it was common knowledge that only the best of the best made it into that building, be they teachers or students. "But, until then, I guess I'll have to give this a try..."
Kouran glanced over fearfully at Houjun, noting the disbelieving look in his eyes and imagining the thoughts that were flying through his troubled mind. Surely, they couldn't be much different than her own, she decided, as she turned her own brown orbs back to the new teacher and frantically began searching for some answers to her questions.
This woman should not be here! This woman could not be here! She had promised that she would keep Houjun safe, that she would block all attempts to free him, that she would help to save him! So then, why... why was she barging into the picture now, and in their closed world, no less?! How could she... why would she...
'Wait,' Kouran's eyes opened slightly as the realization hit her. She sat back in her chair, every muscle tensing. 'She said she had a sister... a sister that would try to stop us... so, then... is this her?' The young woman stared intently at the mysterious teacher, wide eyes suddenly narrowing angrily. 'And she thinks we'll let her win!? Fat chance of that!'
Kouran turned her gaze back to Houjun, frowning worriedly at the way he was staring at Tenshuru-sensei. His eyes looked worried, almost scared, and he was clearly surprised at what he was seeing; but there was something else in his gaze that heightened the young woman's feeling of uneasiness. Houjun's mouth was set in a stubborn line, as if he were trying to figure out why he had seen her before... or, rather, trying to remember why he had seen her before...
"Houjun?" Kouran whispered, leaning across the small space between their desks and touching his hand lightly with her own. "Houjun?" she called again. "Is... is everything all right?"
Her friend and beloved jumped slightly, as if startled out of a day-dream or memory, jerking his head in her direction. Houjun blinked a few times, shaking his head a little to clear it of whatever thoughts he may have been having. "Hai, hai. H-heki [I'm fine]... it's just... " he leaned over just far enough so he could whisper without being heard by anyone else. "Have you... have you ever seen Tenshuru-sensei before? I feel like I know her from somewhere, except I keep wanting to call her 'Asatenshi.'"
"Asatenshi?" Kouran raised a confused eyebrow. She had to play her part right, down to the last tiny detail. Otherwise this would all be for nothing. "I don't think so..." the young woman shot a glance at Tenshuru Asashi, frowning thoughtfully. "Hm...Ryuichi-sensei said she was from a neighboring village. Maybe she visited here once or twice, and you saw her then. She does look a little familiar, I guess."
He nodded and turned back to the front, seeming to accept her answer. But his doubts were still written clearly on his face, and Kouran worried about what he might be thinking. Could he be trying to place her face? Could he be trying to remember her? Remember that?
'No...no, he couldn't be. Why would he want to?' Kouran watched him carefully, brown eyes softening as they often did when she looked his way. 'Oh, Houjun, I wish we didn't have to put you through this, but it's the only way that we can...'
"Ah, let's see...Suzunami-san, isn't it?"
The young woman whirled around in her seat, nearly knocking her books off her desk. She met Asashi's eyes squarely with her own, stiffening like a soldier coming to attention. "H-hai, Tenshuru-sensei! Atashi wa... Su-Suzunami Kouran."
Tenshuru smiled in amusement as they rest of the class tittered at her strange actions. "A pleasure to meet you, Suzunami-san, but I was asking if you knew what the class was currently studying."
Cheeks a bright red, the young woman looked down at her notes and tried desperately to cover her embarassment. "H-hai, Sensei. We were talking about the, eto, the Kutou war from a century ago. I'm not sure how far into it we were, though..."
"That's quite all right. Thank you for your input, Suzunami-san." The young teacher turned her eyes to the rest of the class, her ever-present half-smile still playing on her lips. "Hm... let's see, who to call upon...?" Asashi's enchanting emerald orbs slid past Kouran once again, finally coming to rest on the tense Houjun. "Ah, Ri-san!"
The young man looked up, jerking out of his private world almost as quickly as he had entered it. He blinked a couple of times, and Kouran noticed that his hands were trembling as he fought up the nerve to answer the mysteriously familiar teacher. The teacher whom he had seen before, but only in his dreams. "Ten... Tenshuru-sensei?"
"Perhaps you can tell us a little bit about the Hokkan-Kutou war, Ri-san," she suggested, leaning against her desk and piercing his gaze with an emerald stare. "With them being such a close neighbor, I'm sure you know something about Kutou's position in those battles."
Kouran frowned, glancing down at her history papers. She had thought Tenshuru would have said something a bit more intimidating than that. 'Maybe I'm paranoid, and she really is just a new teacher...'
"Ri-san!"
"Ri!"
"Houjun-kun!"
Kouran's head jerked up at the surprised calls of her classmates. She glanced around wildly, eyes finally coming to rest on what had caused the others to shout. The sight made her heart race. Her beloved had a hand over his left eye, grappling wildly at the area as he moaned softly to himself. His mouth was stretched in a grimace of indescribable pain; Kouran had only seen that look once before, but she knew well enough what it meant.
Suzaku, no. It was happening again. And this time, what if...? "Houjun..." she whispered quietly, feeling tears well up in the corners of her eyes. Tenshuru had done it. Without Kouran even noticing, she had done it. And now... oh, and now!
The young woman wanted to move to Houjun's side, but found herself unable to do so. Paralyzed by fear, panic and dread, she could only stare helplessly as her fellow classmates crowded around him, calling out to him but not daring to get too close. Asashi glanced anxiously at the young man, wringing her hands as she debated on fetching the headmaster or taking care of this herself. After another moment and more of Houjun's cries, she finally made her decision. "I'll be right back, minna-san... ah, Ri-san, if you can hear me I'm going to get Ryuichi-sensei, so hang on, okay!? Oh, gods..."
The door slammed behind Tenshuru, but no one else seemed to notice. Their attention was fixed intently on Houjun, who had barely moved since the incident had begun. His other hand, the one that wasn't pressed tightly against his eye, shook as it clawed at thin air, desperately trying to find something, anything, to hang onto, to anchor it to reality and the world it knew.
Houjun! she mouthed silently, closing her eyes and putting her hands over her mouth. Gods, why...?
"Kouran...!"
The young woman looked up, blinking in surprise and confusion. Had someone... had he...?
"Kouran..." Houjun muttered, voice a husky whisper, as if he were on the verge of tears; or perhaps a breakdown. "I promised Kouran... I promised her I wouldn't leave... I can't, I won't... Kouran..."
Her eyes welled with tears. Despite his pain, despite his visions and nightmares and questions, Houjun was thinking about her? Houjun was concerned about her? And after everything she had done...
His words were enough to snap the female student out of her daze. Kouran practically jumped out of her desk, sending her school supplies flying as she did. She knelt next to her friend, taking his flailing hand in her own and squeezing as tightly as she dared. "Houjun, Houjun, I'm here... it's going to be okay." She lay her head against his trembling shoulder, closing her eyes and allowing a few tears to squeeze their way past her lashes. "Oh, Houjun... you're not going anywhere. You're going to be fine. Everything... everything's going to be fine. Just rest, please. Don't worry about me. Just rest."
A few seconds later, almost as if at her bidding, the young man's shoulder went slack against her cheek. Kouran breathed a sigh of relief, glad that he had released himself from his pain but frightened for his current condition. If this sort of thing kept up, then there was no way she and Hikou could protect him from that world; from that cruel, vicious reality that was so eager to snatch him back.
Kouran gave his hand a reassuring squeeze, burying her face in his sleeve and setting her jaw stubbornly. 'No. I won't let it happen. No matter what she tries to do, no matter what any of them try to do... I won't allow it! I'll protect you from all of that, Houjun, even if it kills me. Again. I'll save you this time. That's my promise to you.'
"Sonofabitch!"
A bedraggled Tasuki slammed the door of his room open, stomping into his private quarters. He pushed some of his wind-blown hair out of his eyes, rubbed his frost-bitten hands together, and slumped down onto his bed with a grumbled curse. An equally disguntled Koji soon followed, looking little better than his tired friend. They gave almost no notice to the comatose monk on the floor, nor to the often-present Hikaru who was tending to their friend; at the moment, other things commanded their attention.
"Those damned Akutsuki bastards!" Tasuki swore loudly, whacking his bedpost with his tessen. "Messin' up our food supplies an' then leadin' us on that false trail jus' so we c'd get all tired 'n' frozen 'n' winded 'n' come back t'the stronghold all pissed off with half our supplies spoiled! Shit-faced ass-wipin' donkey-fuckin' sons-a-bitches!"
Hikaru looked up and blinked very large, emerald eyes at the seishi bandit. "Sa... sh-should I leave?"
Tasuki looked down, blinking equally large, amber eyes at the young woman. "Ah, Hikaru. Didn't see ya sittin' there. Jus' pretend ya didn't hear any-a that."
Koji sweatdropped. "Genrou tends t'get a little vulgar when things don't go right. An' he tends t'get really vulgar when things are goin' downright terrible." The Reikaku co-leader sighed, scratching at his scar unhappily. "In one week, those Akutsuki guys've done more damage'n gangs twice their size have ever done t'Reikaku."
"That's 'cause they're dirty rotten scummy cheaters!" Tasuki ranted, smacking his bedpost with his fan again. "Only pure slime'd poison another stronghold's supplies of food 'n' water! It's a good thing Genji-kun only had a little taste-a that sauce!" The bandit gritted his teeth, clenching a fist unhappily. "I shoulda seen that comin'... those bastards... they coulda killed Genji-kun, an' a lotta others..."
"Oi, Genrou, don't blame yerself," Koji remarked, thumping his friend lightly on the shoulder. "Like you said, they are scum. You 'n' me 'n' th' boys, we ain't, an' it's gonna be harder fer us t'fight 'em 'cause we don't think as dirty as they do."
"Fight 'em!?" Tasuki jumped up, waving his tessen wildly. "We're not gonna fight 'em! We're gonna masacre 'em! We're gonna murderize 'em! We're gonna kick their scrawny cheatin' asses! We're gonna-!" Tasuki's stomach rumbled; the entire group sweatdropped.
"Maybe you ought to eat first," Hikaru suggested. She paused, frowning a little. "Unless... did these Akutsuki bandits destroy all of your food?"
Koji waved a reassuring hand. "Nah, maybe jus' half of it. It's a pain, 'cause we're gonna have t'go get supplies in this winter weather, but we've got enough money stashed away that it won't be too hard on us."
"My ass it won't!"
The tan bandit held up his hands, grinning nervously at his livid friend. "Eesh, calm down Genrou. It coulda been a lot worse. At least no one was hurt - well, Genji-kun's got an upset stomach, but that's all - an' they didn't get all th' food. An' now that we understan' their dirty tricks, we'll be prepared, na."
"That's not th' point! It's th' principle of th' thing, Koji! We can't jus' let 'em waltz around an' do whatever they want, or they're gonna start thinkin' we're wimps!"
"Sou, sou, but if we go out there an' try t'fight 'em, we could wind up gettin' ourselves killed. We still don't know how many guys they got, or even where their hideout is."
"We're the famous bandits of Mount Reikaku! We c'n take on any gang!"
"Well, that may be so, but would ya be willin' t'do that at th' expense-a lives?"
"If it'd save more people from gettin' hurt like Genji-kun was, then hell, yes!"
Koji sighed, rubbing his temples. "Yer hopeless, Genrou."
"All right, if you don't agree with me, 'n' I don't agree with you, we'll get a third opinion," Tasuki suggested, arms crossed stubbornly across his chest. He whirled his amber eyes in Hikaru's direction. "Oi, Hikaru! Whadda you think? Should we attack b'fore they get cocky-"
"Or should we take th' defensive t'save lives?" Koji finished.
The young woman grinned nervously at the pair of equally stubborn bandits, poking her index fingers together. "I'm not really much of a campaigner... do I really have to answer this?"
"Yes you do!"
"Is this how the two of you solve all the problems around here?"
"Yes it is!"
Hikaru sighed. "Well, in that case..." she paused thoughtfully. "This is just my opinion, but, hm... I agree with Koji-san, because I don't think it's a good idea to go diving head-first into a battle, especially if you don't know your enemy very well..."
Koji grinned at the young woman, slightly surprised that she had taken his side but pleased nonetheless. "Arigatou, Hikaru-san."
"...But I agree with Tasuki, too, because you don't want to give them a lot of time to think up a plan."
Reikaku's leader smirked at his companion. "Arigatou, Hikaru." Tasuki blinked, then looked back at Asatenshi curiously. "Wait... you jus' agreed with two completely diff'rent ideas."
"Hm..." she grinned, rubbing the back of her head. "I guess I did, didn't I?" The two bandits face-vaulted. "However, I think I might be able to help you come to a conclusion."
"You can?"
Hikaru nodded. "Mm! If you'd like, I can build a protection barrier around the stronghold. I'm sorry to say I can't create a field that large that would keep your enemies out, but if any of them got within the grounds of Reikaku, anyone with a magical aura - Shuu-chan, Tasuki, and myself - would know immediately!" She frowned a little. "I know that doesn't help you entirely, but this way you can take some time to gather more information about your enemies without the fear of them sneaking unnoticed onto Reikaku territory."
"You c'd really do that?" Tasuki asked.
"Certainly!" she agreed. "It's the least I can do, after the hospitality you and Koji-san have shown me. I have some things to take care of today, but tomorrow morning I'll go out and do that right away."
Koji and Tasuki both frowned thoughtfully, but for different reasons. The bandit co-leader was wondering how the Akutsuki members could know so much about Reikaku territory so quickly, and once again mulling over the idea of a traitor in Reikaku's midst. But who could it be...?
Tasuki's mind, on the other hand, had flitted away from the rival gang as soon as the monk's name had been mentioned. "Oi, Hikaru... about that spell..." he sat back down on his bed, putting his chin in his hands. "You told me it would start t'take effect in a week, na?" A nod. "Well, it's been a week, ain't it?" Another nod. "And...?"
Asatenshi looked up with a half-smile on her pretty face. "It's working, I can promise you that. In fact, I believe that I broke through today - with a little luck, Chichiri is starting to remember things a bit more. Maybe he's created his link, the person I told you about before. However..." Hikaru bit her lip unhappily.
"However?" Tasuki pressed, leaning forward on his bed anxiously. The seishi bandit had been so caught up in the Akutsuki affairs this past week that he had been too tired to speak with the monk at night, and he worried that Hikaru's "however" would involve his inactivity with Chichiri. If Chichiri died, and it wound up being his fault again...
No. Stop. It was never his fault. It wasn't anybody's fault. Nobody's fault. Quit thinking about it. About the past. About regrets. About death. About everything.
"I'm having a hard time completing the spell. It's like, when I send it to Chichiri, it has to go through a thick net to reach him, and by the time it does reach him almost the entire spell has been filtered out. Caught and stopped, if you will."
Koji glanced at Tasuki, but noticed that he was only paying half attention to Asatenshi. Even Koji wasn't completely sure where his best friend went when he got caught in his private world, in that dark place of weakness and self-doubt that he had discovered and gained after his seishi travels. Tasuki had been different since then, and had been reluctant to speak to even Koji about it. His tan counterpart never pushed it, of course, knowing that Tasuki needed his privacy in some things. Nevertheless, it worried him a little when Reikaku's leader slipped into uncertainty.
The co-leader decided to speak up, if only to break the silence and bring his friend back to earth. "You mentioned that t'me earlier. Better explain t'Genrou over here what that means," he chuckled, trying to relieve some of the tension in the room, "he's a little slow, heheh."
Hikaru looked back at the monk, touching a hand lightly to his unmasked face. "It means someone's trying to block my spell. That somebody wants Chichiri to stay in his closed universe, probably forever."
Tasuki jerked his head up, realizing what she had said. "Someone...?"
"I wouldn't be surprised if it's the same person who put the spell on him in the first place," she continued quietly. "I didn't expect to get this kind of trouble... it's going to be a lot harder, and it might take longer as well." Hikaru glanced up, meeting Tasuki's golden gaze and smiling assuredly. "Don't worry, Tasuki. I'm certain I'll reach Chichiri before it's too late. He's very wise, so he should figure out quickly that something is wrong; not to mention he must miss you. He'll come back."
The Reikaku leader didn't return her smile. He didn't have the energy. "I sure's hell hope so..."
Koji looked at his two companions, united in their fight for Chichiri's life, and felt something inside of him tighten further. Even though he knew it shouldn't have bothered him - Hikaru was just trying to make Tasuki feel better, it wasn't like it meant anything - for some reason, even that tiny action of sympathy...
"Koji-samaaaaaaa!"
The trio of companions jumped at the ungodly wail. The bandit whose name had been called blinked wide hazel eyes, glancing at Tasuki. "What th' hell was that?"
"Koji-sama, it hurts it hurts, te kanjiiiiiii!!"
Reikaku's leader put a thoughtful finger to his chin "That sounds a hell of a lot like Genji-kun..."
Koji slapped his head, remembering something from earlier. "Ack! It is Genji-kun! I'm such an idiot." He stood, offering a quick explanation. "After that poisonin' incident this mornin', I felt a little responsible 'cause I requested th' food fer breakfast, so I offered t'do what I c'd t'help him feel better."
"Koji-samaaaaaaa! Please hurry! I'm dying, I'm dying!"
Tasuki frowned. "Wait... Ain't he sharin' yer room right now?" A nod. "An' ain't yer room on th' other side of th' stronghold?" Another nod. Tasuki sweatdropped. "Then how th' hell c'n we hear him from here!?"
"Please don't let me die this painful death by myself, te kanjiiiiiii!"
"Hey, he's Genji-kun. I wouldn't put much past him," Koji said, wincing as the young bandit's cries pierced the relative tranquility of the afternoon. "I'd better go see what he needs."
"Come back when yer done, will ya? I still need t'talk t'ya about some stuff."
"Hai, hai. Dewa, Genrou, Hikaru-san."
The bandit was out the door in a moment, closing it behind him and leaving the seishi and shrine maiden alone. Tasuki frowned, laying back on his bed and looking up at the ceiling. The room was silent for several long seconds, until the bandit sighed heavily and asked: "Is there anythin' else I c'n do? T'help make sure yer spell works, or t'stop whoever's tryin' t'block it?"
Hikaru chuckled humourlessly. "Not unless you can find the person who is doing this and stop them. No, there's really nothing either of us can do about that, I'm afraid to say. We'll just have to trust Chichiri, my magic, and his connection to you."
"Nothin' I can do," he said quietly. Tasuki snorted, grumbling quietly to himself. "Figures. Stupid. Useless. Jus' like with th' others..."
Asatenshi glanced up, hearing the obvious frustration and pain in the seishi's voice. "Hm? 'The others'?" The bandit offered no response. Hikaru gently pressed the issue. "Is this about the other seishi? Chichiri mentioned them, from time to time. I understand that four of them were killed during your journey..."
"Five of 'em," Tasuki said flatly. "Tamahome might as well be dead. He's in th' other world, with our Priestess, Miaka."
Miaka...
No. Don't think about that. Especially about that. That was the worst. That had always been the worst. He had to push that one away. Forget about it. That wasn't his fault. None of it was.
Then whose fault was it...?
"Tasuki?" Hikaru said quietly, almost as if she were afraid to speak. "This brings you a lot of pain, doesn't it? Even after so long... was it really that bad?"
"Not all bad," he answered, voice just as hushed. Tasuki couldn't bring himself to meet the woman's eyes. "There were good times, too. Fun times. I learned a lot about myself. A lotta strengths. But there was other stuff, too..."
And somehow, he finished silently, none of that happiness compared with the weaknesses he had found inside of himself. None of that could cover the sorrow, the blame, the hate, the blind lust, the darkness he'd found in his heart. That was why he relied so heavily on Koji, wasn't it? Why he was so afraid that Chichiri, his quiet protector, might die too? Because he couldn't count on himself in the hard times, couldn't be trusted to do the right thing or the smart thing or the brave thing. He couldn't believe in those strengths, not when his weaknesses were lurking so close by. Especially after...
No. That hadn't been his fault. He couldn't say that was his fault. He had had no control over it. There was nothing he could have done. That one time. All those times. No control. Not his fault. Not his fault.
Then who...?
Shut up. Stop thinking about it. Keep going. Move ahead. Live.
"You don't trust yourself, do you?" Hikaru said quietly.
Tasuki jerked his arm away from her, crossing them over his chest and scowling fiercely. "What the hell kind of question is that?" The bandit sat up, gripping his fists tightly in an effort to calm himself while he pushed his thoughts far into his heart and out of the way. Don't think about it. Forget it. It was easier that way. "Of course I trust myself!"
The bandit regretted the words as soon as they came out. Hikaru pulled away, frowning and looking down. "S... sorry, Tasuki. I didn't mean to pry. It was just... for a minute there, you looked like the loneliest person in the world."
"Well, I ain't," he snapped grumpily, refusing to look at her. "Ch, leader-a th' Reikaku bandits, bein' lonely. Girls're such idiots. How annoyin'."
Out in the hallway, Koji walked up to the door. He was just about to do his whole "knock knock" bit when he heard Hikaru's hushed voice behind the wood. Curious - and something else, though he couldn't place his finger on the emotion - as to what she would be speaking so gently about, Koji withheld from knocking and listened silently to the private conversation.
"... You must hate women an awful lot," Hikaru remarked, emerald eyes on the floor. "Chichiri said that I would probably get on your nerves, but I tried to do my best to make a good impression." She tried a smile that fell short. "I guess I managed to screw that up on that pretty good, didn't I?"
Tasuki's golden eyes softened a little. He hated seeing girls cry. Inwardly, he kicked himself for being such a loud-mouthed, well, bandit. "Oi, Hikaru, that ain't true. Yer a pretty good person, y'know. An' really, ya don't get on my nerves a whole lot. You've been... pretty helpful, come t'think of it."
It wasn't her fault he didn't like women, after all. She couldn't help that. Hell, even he couldn't help that. Not after all the trouble they caused, all the pain and the heartache...
Women were the reason he had first learned about death and losing people you care about. They were the reason he and his companions had gotten hurt and killed. They were the reason he couldn't trust himself anymore. They were the reason why he had almost lost his soul to a demon.
Women were the reason he was having these thoughts to begin with.
"I don't hate girls," he grumbled "I promised a friend that I wouldn't say I hated girls anymore. They still annoy me, sometimes, but they ain't all that stupid. At least, you ain't." Tasuki looked away; he couldn't believe he was actually saying this! "Anyway... sorry I snapped at ya like that."
"That's all right. It was my fault for prying," Hikaru assured him. The young woman paused, watching the bandit with concern in her emerald eyes. Hesitantly, she lay a hand on his knee, looking up at him from her kneeling position on the floor.
Tasuki stiffened, amber eyes meeting her emerald ones. Hers were full of gentle compassion; his wide with surprise. "Eh, Hikaru..."
She smiled. "I understand that you've been through a lot. And I won't push you to talk about it. But, if you ever need someone to speak to, about anything... I'll be here, okay?" The Asatenshi sister looked down, blushing just slightly. "If you'll let me, I'd like to help you trust yourself again."
The bandit snorted, looking away again. He knew he should have been mad, or at least protective over the way she had looked straight into his heart and guessed about all his uncertainties, but for some reason... The bandit grumbled a response, but there was a small smile on his lips. "I guess I oughta be grateful, na?"
Hikaru smiled in modest embarrassment. "It's nothing, Tasuki. I just hope that, someday, you can..."
"Knock knock! Who's there! It's Koji, comin' back from Genji-kun's room like he promised. Ah, Koji, come right in, we missed ya. A-ri-ga-tou..." the doors swung open, revealing the tanned bandit. Neither Tasuki nor Hikaru noticed the way his grip tightened slightly on the door as he saw Asatenshi's hand on his bandit friend's knee.
The seishi grinned, waving at his companion. "Welcome back, Koji. Ya got good timin': Hikaru was jus' finishin' up in here."
Hikaru broke eye contact with Tasuki, pulling her hand off his knee and turning her emerald orbs back to the monk. "Oh! I guess I am pretty much done." She stood, dusting off her skirt slightly. "I'm going to go get some lunch - I'm starving."
"Lunch!" Tasuki turned chibi and slapped a fist into his open palm. "I almost fergot about lunch! Oi, Koji, b'fore we talk about that Akutsuki gang, how about some grub first, na?" He lay back on his bed, stretching and grinning wolfishly at his friend. "I'll jus' take a plateful of whatever we got. Bring it on back in here an' we c'n chat. C'mon, hop to it, I'm starvin' over here."
Koji scowled at his friend, folding his arms over his chest. He had to play his part. Couldn't let Tasuki and Hikaru know how he was feeling. It was probably nothing, anyway. The two of them were just friends, after all. The seishi bandit wasn't even interested in girls. That's right. It was nothing.
So why did his heart hurt so much?
"You lazyass!" he laughed, holding the door open courteously as Hikaru walked out before him. "Fine, but I'm only doin' this 'cause I'm already up. You owe me fer this one."
"Yeah, yeah, whatever ya say," Tasuki waved a dismissive hand, watching as the door closed behind his best friend. Oblivious to Koji's troubles, he made himself comfortable and looked up at the peeling ceiling of his room. Hikaru was certainly an interesting person. The bandit didn't think he had ever met anyone quite like her. She wasn't too bad, even if she was a woman. And what a weird thing to say...
"If you'll let me, I'd like to help you trust yourself again."
Tasuki chuckled slightly. "Oi, 'Chiri, wanna know somethin' funny? I feel better t'day than I have in a week, an' it's all 'cause-a what some girl said. Ha, I really am goin' senile..."
"So you're saying he just keeled over all of a sudden?"
'Dare [Who]...?'
"That's right, Headmaster. The other students say it was a headache - that it had happened before."
"Humph! Why wasn't I informed of this!? Well, nevermind. What should we do about it?"
'Headmaster... Ryuichi-sensei. And another voice. But I don't know it.' Houjun moaned softly, too quietly for anyone but himself to hear. 'I wish they'd quiet down a little... ite, why does my face hurt?' His left eye twitched involuntarily, as if the action could send away the dull throb that occupied his skull from eyebrow to nose.
"Do? I, I'm not sure... I suppose we should get his parents, shouldn't we? Oh, or should we wait until he wakes up and see what he wants to do? I don't know..."
Wait. He did know that voice. It was Asatenshi. No, that wasn't right, he didn't know anybody by that name. It was Tenshuru. Tenshuru Asashi, the new, temporary teacher. The woman with those mysterious green eyes, the ones he had felt like he was drowning in. When she had turned those eyes on him, and asked that question...
"Let's give it a few more minutes. Maybe he'll come around and we can see how he feels. If not, then we'll get his parents."
"But Ryuichi-sensei, what if we wait too long and...?"
Houjun pulled himself out of slumber at the sound of the newest voice. 'Kouran.' Nearby, too, probably right next to him. That would explain the warm fingers grasping his hand. She sounded worried, scared, borderline panicked. He would take a little pain in his eye over seeing her in pain. Reluctantly, the young man gave a groan and opened his eyes. Houjun found himself still sitting at his desk, with his head in his arm and Kouran almost directly in front of him. He smiled weakly. "It's all right, Kouran. I'm okay no da." Ach. There was that damned "no da" again.
His companion jerked her head around, violet hair flying over her shoulder. "Houjun!?"
He nodded, forcing himself into a sitting position. He blinked, partially to rid himself of sleepiness, partially to clear the images of the blonde shogun that still flashed in his mind. "Hai. 'S me."
The young woman's worried frown curled upwards into a smile of immense relief. "Houjun..." She threw her arms around his neck, hugging him tightly in spite of the teachers and students that stood nearby. "Yokatta! Oh, thank goodness you're all right! When you started... I thought... I worried..."
He returned the embrace, wishing the throb in his eye would disappear. It had never lasted this long before. "I told you already, Kouran. I'm not going anywhere. I promised, didn't I?"
Seeming to remember where she was, Houjun's beloved pulled sharply away, blushing at her brash display of affection. "Ah... h-hai. I guess... I guess you did. S-sorry about all that..."
Houjun chuckled at her embarrassment, but didn't answer. He turned his mahogany orbs towards Ryuichi, smiling at the Headmaster. As much as his face ached, and as much as those visions of that man sent shivers down his spine, he couldn't afford to show his anxiety and worries in class. Not in front of his friends. Not in front of Kouran. He had caused enough fear in her life as it was. "Sumimasen, Ryuichi-sensei, for making you come out here. Eiri-san says I'm overworking myself. I guess I must have been thinking too hard, or something." He thumped his own head lightly to make a point.
He forced a laugh, and the rest of the class chuckled with him, even though it wasn't really funny. Ryuichi raised an inquisitive eyebrow, but shrugged dismissively. "Well, if you say you're all right then I'll accept your answer. You're old enough to know your own health, I s'pose. And anyway, you weren't out for more than a minute or so, so..."
Tenshuru touched a delicate hand to the Headmaster's sleeve, just slightly. She frowned worriedly. "Are you sure about that, sir? The way he almost collapsed like that... he seemed to be in a lot of pain..." The female teacher shot a quick, nervous glance in Houjun's direction. Her eyes stared straight into his, and for a split second the young man was certain he saw those emerald orbs sparkle with pleasure.
'She triggered it,' he thought to himself, his own eyes widening as the realization struck. 'She did something. Maybe not exactly on purpose, but she had an idea of what it would do...' He watched as Tenshuru argued her case with Ryuichi, who seemed unsure of himself for one of the first times in his life. But the young man wasn't paying attention to her words; he was focusing on her intently, trying to see through her outer layer of worry and into her true soul. 'I don't know how, but somehow she understands what's happening to me. Maybe she'll be able to give me some answers, help me figure all of this out...'
Houjun set his jaw stubbornly. Now he definitely couldn't leave school, not when he might finally have an answer to his visions of death and misery. "Ryuichi-sensei? Tenshuru-sensei?" The two teachers paused in their debate to look his way. "I understand your concern and all, but I'll be all right. Really. I want to stay here, okay? Nothing else is going to happen."
'Nothing,' he added silently to himself, ' except maybe, just maybe, my peace of mind.'
The rest of the school day dragged by unbearably slowly, even though Houjun barely paid attention in his classes. He went through the motions like he was expected, teasing Kouran about her anxiety over a test, laughing at his classmates' jokes, making a jab at Headmaster Ryuichi's behavior that morning. None of the others seemed even slightly aware that his mind was miles away, that he was only going through the motions, that his thoughts were focused completely on Tenshuru-sensei and how he was going to confront her. And although he jotted down answers on his history test that were certainly wrong, he managed to come up with a good answer to his other, bigger problems.
He decided to speak to the young teacher after school. He would say he was going in to ask about homework - that he didn't catch the assignment during class, which was true - and see what information he could get out of her. Houjun was still debating on how he would bring up the subject when Tenshuru finally dismissed the class, darting out of the room as she did. The young man stood, blinking to bring himself back to reality, and started to gather his things together.
"Oi, Ri-kun, do you want to come to my house after school?" a fellow classmate, Yukibara Shigure, asked, leaning against his desk. "Us fourth-years are gonna cram for the big history test at the end of this week. I think Suzunami-san's gonna be there. What do you say? You game?"
Hajimoto Airi joined Shigure, grinning and winking at her blue-haired friend. "Unless your brain's too fried from studying for that Hell Exam, the kakyo. Wouldn't want to have one of those meltdowns again, would you?"
The young man glanced up at the pair of students, smiling automatically. "I need to talk to Tenshuru-sensei for a few minutes, but then sure, I'll come over. I could use some help on that test."
"You? Need help? Mister Perfect Grades?" Airi put a hand to her chest in feigned shock. "What's the world coming to?"
Shigure laughed, shaking his head. "Man, your brain really is fried." He waved a hand in his classmate's direction, turning to leave with Airi on his heels. "Well, I'll see you in a few. Jaa ne, Ri-kun."
"Jaa, Shigure-kun, Hajimoto-san!"
Houjun breathed a sigh of relief, turning back to his supplies. Practically the entire class - it was a small group, only seven students in all - would be over at Shigure's house. That meant that none of them would bother him about things to do after school. He would be free to visit Tenshuru and talk for as long as he wanted...
The young man turned to leave the classroom, only to find Kouran waiting for him outside the door. His childhood companion smiled at her friend, almost immediately linking her hand in his. "So, are you going to Yukibara's house? I need to run by my house and pick up some extra ink, but if you want to come with me we can walk there together."
Houjun swore inwardly. He didn't want to say no to Kouran, but he couldn't pass up this opportunity to speak with that mysterious teacher. The young man scratched his neck nervously. "Actually, I needed to talk to Tenshuru-sensei for a few minutes. What with everything that went on in her class today, I didn't catch a lot of the work."
"Oh, I can help you with all that!" she assured him. "Wrote the assignment down and everything."
Kuso. He should have known she would say that. "Thanks for the offer, but maybe it'd be better if I got the information straight from the teacher. After all, I won't be able to rely on you and Hikou to help me get caught up at the university next year, so I should get some practice. We can still walk to Yukibara's house together," he assured her quickly, mistaking her look of displeasure for disappointment. "You can go to your house and then come back and meet me here. Okay?"
Her frown did not lessen, but she gave a small nod of approval. Kouran released his hand, quickening her pace as they walked out the main doors. "Mm. I'll go take care of that now."
"I'll meet you here in front," he called after her, waiting until she was around the corner and out of sight before continuing across the grounds towards the University building next door. The young teacher had said she was going to be teaching music, so that would make her classroom at the end of the east corridor. Houjun bustled through the doors of the university building, breathing in the scents of ink and soaking in the sound of a student reciting an ancient poem. He had always loved the university, though he could never explain why.
The young man turned a corner, walking rapidly down the short hallway and going over the many ways he could begin his conversation. "No matter how I look at it, this is destined to be awkward," he sighed. "And if my suspicions are wrong, then she's going to think I'm insane. Just great..."
Houjun trailed off, ears perking up at a faint sound that echoed down the hallway. He stopped for a moment, cocking his head and realizing that he was listening to the music of a flute. He started walking again, allowing himself to fall into the rises and falls of the high, vibrant melody. The music was familiar, and as the sound became clearer he realized that he knew the words. It was "Hoshi no Namida [Tears of the Stars]," an old tune, one his mother had sung to him when he was younger, and one that he had sung to Kyoui when she was little. One evening, he had even taught it to...
Who had he taught it to?
The young man shook his head, noticing that he was standing inside the doorway of Tenshuru's room; the door the music echoed from. He glanced across the room, gaze landing on the young, pretty teacher who was engrossed in her playing. She didn't seem to notice him, so lost was she in the trills and scales of the music. Houjun smiled slightly, listening as the cheerful piece came to its final verses. He couldn't help but join in, vibrating tenor mingling with the flute's notes:
"Gazing into the flowing water
My only thought is that your beautiful reflection
Shall never again stand beside my own.
The current streams silently by
Just like the past I left behind
Somehow, though, that's beautiful, too.
Gazing up at the faraway sky
I cast my wish upon a single falling star
Dreaming of the day we may meet again
I embrace it tightly, and close my eyes."
Houjun opened his mahogany orbs, surprised to realize that Tenshuru had stopped playing during the last verse and was now clapping appreciatively. The student blushed, ducking his head. "Sumimasen, Sensei. I didn't mean to interrupt you; it's just that I've known that song for so long..."
She shook her head, smiling at the clearly embarassed younger man. "No need for apologies, Ri-san. Very few people know that old one anymore; it's nice to see someone with a good taste in music. It's also nice to have a partner in playing; I'm a fair flutist, but I'm not much of a singer."
He chuckled. "I'm not much of either. I actually tried playing the flute for a year or two."
"Didn't like it?"
"Didn't like my teacher," he corrected. "Anyway, I was never very good. I'm not exactly musical, I guess."
"Oh, you're just being modest!" she laughed, patting the seat next to her in a silent invitation. "You've got an exquisite voice. That's half the reason I stopped playing, just so I could listen. The other half was that my mediocre playing sounded so terrible when accompanied by a first-class singer."
"Now you're the one being modest," he said with a smile, accepting the seat. "Sorry to interrupt you, by the way. I wanted to talk to you about the schoolwork today."
Tenshuru Asashi nodded, glancing down at the wooden instrument in her hands. Her smile seemed far away and dreamy. "It's an interesting song, don't you think? The tune is very upbeat and cheerful, but when you listen to the lyrics you realize that it's actual a story of sorrow. Contradictions are beautiful, don't you think?"
Houjun nodded, sighing drearily. "My life feels that way, right now," he muttered, more to himself than the teacher. He felt Asashi's eyes on him, watching him curiously. Deciding that this would be a good way to get the topic of his visions started, the young man went on. "On the surface - to my classmates, teachers and family - I look perfectly happy, just an average student with an average life. But when you take a closer look..." he frowned. Somehow, this wasn't going where he wanted it to go. "I guess I just can't find the answers to a lot of problems, problems that really need answers."
"Perhaps you aren't looking hard enough," the young teacher suggested casually.
"But how can I search when it hurts me and everyone around me so much?" he demanded helplessly. "The harder I look for the truth, the more pain it causes. How can I bear it? It'd be easier if the problems would just go away... just vanish and leave me alone..."
"The longer you run from things, the bigger they become," Asashi said in an off-hand manner, as if she were throwing the advice into the air to be taken at will, rather than shoving it into his hands.
"But I don't know how to find the answers!" he insisted, knowing he must sound childish but unable to help it. "That's the whole problem! If someone, anyone, would help me, then maybe it wouldn't be so bad..." Houjun watched her. He had just planted the hint. Now to see if she would understand and help.
"In this case, I think the only person who can help you is you," she remarked. Tenshuru paused thoughtfully. "You're troubled. That's understandable." She thrust the flute into his hands, smiling encouragingly at her temporary student. "Here. You said you played for a few years. Let's see what you remember."
"Huh?" Houjun looked down at the instrument blankly, then back up at his teacher. "But I don't-"
"You'd be surprised how much music can relieve the soul. C'mon, just pick out some notes and fiddle around. Maybe things will seem a little brighter after you clear your mind and heart. It couldn't hurt to try, could it?"
Not sure why he was following her advice, Houjun picked the instrument up somewhat clumsily, fingers seeking out the right positions. "Da... is this right?" Asashi chuckled and nodded. "Okay, I'll give it a try... but don't get angry when your eardrums start bleeding..."
As Tenshuru's cheerful laugh filled the room, the young man put the small flute to his lips and blew. Gently, gently, that nasty Sensei always used to snap at him. He trilled a couple of scales quickly, surprised that he could remember the fingering positions and the notes that accompanied them. There was A, and G, B, C, F, D-sharp...
The young man picked out some of the notes, playing by ear and trying to match his tune to another. Before Houjun knew it, he was playing a light-hearted, happy little song on the instrument, one with no words but plenty of feeling. He twiddled through the simple tune a couple of times, then smiled a little and set the flute down. "Hm. I guess I still remember a few things after all. That wasn't too bad, was it?"
Asashi shook her head fiercely. "Not at all. In fact, it was pretty good." He offered the instrument back to her, which she accepted willingly. "I've never heard that song before. What is it? Where did you hear it?"
"I..." Houjun paused, looking down at the floor. He felt as if he had heard the piece before, as if it had drifted back to him on a distant memory, but now that he thought about it he couldn't place the tune with a name, or even the face of the original player. "I'm not sure..."
FLASH!
A young man smiled at his new companions, holding up his instrument in an offering. "Would you like me to play a song for you? It might help the time go by a little faster, while we're waiting for nightfall."
"Might's well."
"Sounds like a good idea no da."
"Oh, please do, Chiriko!" a girl in a foreign outfit squealed. "Play that happy, pretty one! It'll get me excited about seeing Tamahome this evening, and make me think about how wonderful it'll be!"
The entire company sweatdropped at her enthusiasm. "H-hai, Miaka-san..."
Houjun shook his head, putting his fingers to his eyebrow in an attempt to massage the blaze of pain away. "Ite..."
FLASH!
The same young man from before bowed in greeting. "It's a pleasure to meet you, Chichiri-san. I'm Chiriko."
"Yoroshiku no da," he said carefully. He studied the new seishi curiously. There was something a little odd about the feel of his life force, something not quite right...
Chiriko, as he called himself, straightened once more, holding up his flute with a smile. "My power stems from music. If you'd like, I can play a song. Any requests?"
He returned the smile, worries vanishing in an instant. This newcomer had found Miaka, had saved her, in fact. He had no right no suspect him of something that had never happened. "I don't suppose you know 'Hoshi no Namida,' do you no da?"
"Ri-san?" Tenshuru put a hand on his arm, bringing him back to reality with a snap. "Is everything all right? Are you in a lot of pain? Should I get Ryuichi-sensei, or, oh..."
Houjun shook his head, squinting up at the young teacher through his unhampered eye. "Iie. I'm fine, Sensei. It's just a small one." He paused for a moment, winced slightly, then ran a hand through his messy bangs and looked back up. "See? It's gone already."
"If you say so..." Asashi drew her arm away from his, glancing down at the floor. "You shouldn't push yourself so hard, you know. That's probably what's bringing about those headaches."
Houjun frowned, surprised by her statement simply because it was the same thing everyone else had told him. 'She has to be lying,' he thought to himself, setting his jaw stubbornly. 'She has to be the answer to my problems! If I can't find some kind of peace from her, then where am I supposed to find it?'
Refusing to believe that his lead had been a false one, the young man looked at her intently for a moment, trying to peer through her look of simple concern. He couldn't be wrong about this. His headaches returning, her appearance... no, it couldn't be a coincidence. It couldn't!
"They say that people under a lot of pressure can sometimes get dizzy spells, headaches, nausea, that kind of thing. Ryuichi-sensei mentioned that you were aiming for the kakyo at the end of the year. Is that right?"
Houjun blinked, then sighed and nodded. She was just like everyone else. Concerned, giving friendly advice in an attempt to help. In other words, useless. Wonderful. "Sou," he answered half-heartedly, feeling like a child whose favourite toy had just been broken, and no one knew how to fix it.
Tenshuru didn't seem to notice his sullen mood. She chuckled. "I was a little surprised, to be honest. You don't seem like the type to be interested in politics; the moment I saw you I sensed you as more the artistic, free-spirited type. And after hearing you singing today... did you ever think about getting into a different career? It might be a little less stressful, and more suited to your aura."
Houjun shook his head. "I've been planning to take that test since I was a kid; it's practically a tradition in my family."
"Oh, so you like that sort of thing?"
A shrug. "I don't know. Like I said, I never gave much thought to any other career. I know it'll make my father happy, to see me do what he and my grandfather and so on did."
"Well, yes, but do you enjoy it?" Tenshuru pried. "It's no good doing something just to please others, you know. The only person you have to live with forever is yourself, and if you can't make them happy then you really are in trouble."
"I don't dislike it," he said uneasily. When had the subject turned to his future? No one had ever questioned his decision about his career before; hell, even he had not questioned his decision. It was just something that had always been, something that he had lived his whole life knowing and accepting, without wondering if maybe it was the wrong choice. But now that Tenshuru brought it up...
"Houjun! Houjun, are you still here?" Kouran poked her head around the doorframe, frowning impatiently in his direction. "Goodness, how long does it take to get a little catch-up work? We're going to be late for the cram session if you don't hurry."
"Ah, gomen." Houjun stood quickly, turning his thoughts away from his sudden indecisiveness and towards what really mattered. "I need to leave, Tenshuru-sensei. Can you give me that assignment now?"
"Of course," Asashi took out a small quill pen, scribbling the homework and a quick explanation of what he needed to do on a piece of parchment. "Here," she handed him the paper. "It's due tomorrow. Have fun studying."
Kouran laughed from the doorway. "If that's possible." She took a few steps into the room, grabbing Houjun by the hand and pulling him with uncharacteristic harshness towards the door. "See you tomorrow, Tenshuru-sensei."
The young teacher nodded, smiling and waving at the pair of students. As they reached the doorway, her voice made Houjun stop for another short moment. "Oh, and Ri-san?" He turned, meeting her mysterious emerald eyes with his own mahogany ones. There seemed to be a thousand inner meanings in her next words, though he was ignorant to what those meanings could be. "If you ever want to turn from this chosen path and follow your own star, don't be afraid to come see me. I'd be delighted to help."
Houjun blinked in surprise, opening his mouth to reply, but Kouran was tugging on his arm and he did not want to make her wait. With a quick nod, the young man turned and followed his beloved out of the strange teacher's room and into the familiar reality of the building's halls.
"I don't think you should hang around with that Tenshuru woman too much."
Lost in his own confused thoughts and questions, it took Houjun a minute for Kouran's statement to completely sink in. The two of them were walking home, after a mind-numbing cram session at Shigure's house, and the cold chill of night had already sunk upon the village. The young man shivered a little, asking almost automatically, "Why do you say that?"
There was almost no moon that evening, and Kouran's face was cast into shadows, expression unreadable. "I just... I just don't like her. There's something about her that's unusual... something that I don't trust." The young woman looked away, biting her lip nervously. "I just don't think you should get too friendly with her, that's all."
Houjun chuckled a little, trotting out in front of his friend and turning so he could look at her. He smiled teasingly, using his old childhood nickname for her. "What's wrong, Koujo-sama? What forces you to put such a harsh ban upon one of your loyal subjects? Are you worried that I might get stolen away?" the young man ran a hand through his blue bangs, grinning devilishly at his beloved in the moonlight. "I know it must be hard, being together with someone as dashingly handsome as myself, but you have to have faith a little in me."
Kouran scowled, stomping up to him in mock irritation and crossing her arms over her chest. "You're in for a trip to the imperial dungeons if you don't stop using that silly nickname!"
The young man laughed, throwing a wink in her direction. There was no one around, after all, so it was all right for him to be a little flirtatious. "The dungeons, hm? Is that some kind of code?" He crossed the distance between the pair quickly, putting his arms hesitantly around the woman's waist. "Trying to tell me something, Koujo-sama?"
She giggled a little. "Hikou's right: you are an incurable pervert." There was a small pause in their conversation as Houjun reached down to gently press his lips against hers. He pulled back quickly, always so careful, always worried that he would lose himself in passion and cross a boundary that did not want to be crossed. Kouran wished she could tell him there were no boundaries she did not want him to cross, but it was not in her nature to be straight-forward anymore than it was in his nature to be pushy in their relationship.
The young woman looked up at him, still frowning a little. "Seriously, though, please don't get too close to her."
"She's harmless," Houjun assured her. "And anyway, I'm not interested in Tenshuru-sensei in that way. Really."
He tried to kiss her again, wanted to feel that fire race between them again, but Kouran was insistent. "It's not you I'm worried about. It's her. The way she kept looking at you today... I didn't like it. It made me feel... I don't know." The young woman looked down, face cloaked in late-night shadows. "Please, Houjun. Just don't get too friendly."
Houjun frowned, hugging his beloved. He hesitated for a split second, torn between his desire to understand his headaches - he was not completely convinced that Asashi didn't know something, not after her final comment - and his loyalty to Kouran. His indecisiveness did not last long. "All right," he said after a minute. "If she makes you uncomfortable, then I'll avoid her as much as I do Ryuichi-sensei. More, even."
Kouran chuckled. "To do that, you'd have to live on a different planet." She looked up at him once more, brown eyes reflected in his mahogany ones. "But thanks. You took a lot of stress off my shoulders with that promise."
He returned the smile, leaning his forehead against hers. "Glad I could help, but you really shouldn't worry about that kind of thing. You know I'd never leave you like that, Kou-"
The young man never finished his sentence. Visions flashed in front of his eyes in a rapid blur, moving so quickly that he felt almost dizzy. Houjun gripped Kouran's dress tightly, grasping for stability, for a foothold, for anything...
There was no pain, not this time; there was no need for pain. The images were worse than pain could ever be. The images that whirled through his mind, conveying a story of betrayal in quick, chopping fragments. He could not understand the full story, was unable to understand the details or reasons or emotions behind the visions, so fast were they whizzing by. But he did not need to understand it completely. It was enough. Somehow, it was enough.
Friendship.
Love.
Engagement.
Jealousy.
Lust.
Embrace.
Kiss.
Hikou.
Kouran.
Witness.
Running.
Betrayal.
Tears.
Kouran looked up at her beloved, brown orbs widening at the look of fear in his blank mahogany eyes. "Houjun? Houjun, what is it? What's wrong?"
The young man did not appear to hear her. He slid numbly to the ground, knees in the dewy grass and hands still grasping tightly to Kouran's dress. He stared straight ahead, apparently at nothing, apparently at everything, helpless to stop the images from repeating in his mind, flashing their repetitive dance like a nightmarish broken record.
Friendship. Love. Engagement. Jealousy.
No, no, it couldn't be true... how could it possibly be true...?
Lust. Embrace. Kiss.
Fragments of a memory, fragments of the future, fragments of a broken heart...
Hikou. Kouran. Witness.
"What... what is this...?" he whispered quietly. "How could this... how could they...?"
Running. Questions. Betrayal.
Kouran knelt next to her beloved, holding his shoulders tightly in her hands. Eyes unfocused, he looked through her, like she wasn't there, mind a thousand miles and twenty-one years away. She felt her eyes well up with tears. Was this what Hikou had been talking about? Had he seen this same look of unbearable pain, disbelief, sheer terror in their friend's eyes? Unbearable emotions that they had caused, all in a foolish moment of lust and passion...!? How could she endure it? Kouran held him, sobbing her sorrow into his shoulder. "Houjun, oh, Houjun, forgive me... please forgive me..."
Her words fell on deaf ears. Twin rivulets of salt water ran from the young man's haunted eyes, eyes that were being forced to view a continuous a nightmare, a nightmare that he did not believe, could not believe, and yet felt as if he had no other choice but to believe. Because everything, all of it... all of it had already happened. "H...How...?"
And still, the visions continued.
Tears.
*****
Hao, minna-san!
May I just say that I am so happy I decided not to post this story until I had written well into the first Movement? If I hadn't, I doubt that I'd be getting chapters out every two months, let alone two weeks! And I'm beginning to wonder if there isn't some kind of schoolwide conspiracy that's keeping me from my writings... those rotten teachers. (No, I swear, I'm not really this paranoid. I mean, it's not my fault everyone's out to get me! *Sweatdrop*)
Random Chapter Comments: Yeah, that's right folks, "Hoshi no Namida," the attempt at poetry/song writing that Houjun sings, is my own work. Be gentle in your criticism. >.
And, you know, I was thinking, it was really, really mean of me to leave you with that cliffhanger ending, wasn't it? I do apologize. That doesn't mean I'm going to change it, though. It's no fun if the readers don't squirm a little. But I do feel bad about it. That doesn't help things, though, does it?
Oh, yes, and I would also like to thank my Freshman Health teacher for the line: "The only person you have to live with forever is yourself, and if you can't make them happy then you really are in trouble." She continued to say a version of that throughout the year, and it became engraved in my brain... whether I wanted it there or not. ^_^;
Answering Reviews First off, I'd like to say a big "howdy" to Space Cat-san and Wingstar-san for joining the RFS "Review Crew." *Laughs* Your words always put a little spring to my step and a twinkle to my eye. And no, I'm not kidding. ^.^ Moving on:
On Wingstar-san's remark about Tenshuru: So, were you right, or wrong? I'm curious to hear if you had a particular theory or not - it's always fun to hear analyzations (and fun to write them - isn't that right, Val-chan? *grin*).
Question of the Week How come during the Kutou War, Suboshi had to run along on the ground?! Doesn't he even get a horse? Furthermore, how in the world did he keep up with Nakago, who was on a horse? I thought Tasuki was the seishi with speed...
Verse Preview? One of what will soon be known as my infamous CDCs (Character Development Chapters), which is a short way of saying a chapter that has nothing to do with the plot but is ultimately essential to the story in order for the plot to have a full background. Ponder on that over the next two weeks, why don't you? In the meantime, I'll be working on my American History notes (grr)...
Drowning in Homework,
Dee ~_^