Sorry I didn't update yesterday guys, I was at a friends house and didn't even have time to write the chapter for yesterday…

Well, hope you aren't too mad at me. But I had a life for a night :D

Disclaimer: I am not Richelle Mead and do not own VA. So don't sue me.

As much as I love Sydney, she can be really unhelpful. Is it really that hard to find out more than just a location? Maybe a name? A neighbourhood? May just a city in general? But no. Just a location. Colorado. Didn't she realize how many people live in Colorado? In Denver alone there's over 600 000 people. I mentally sighed at the work ahead of me. Sydney had apologized for the lack of more information but she swore there was seriously nothing else to go on. This little piece took a lot of work as it was, a lot of called in favours and rule bending. She was lucky she wasn't fired.

Her advice to us: Have fun, don't die and avoid capture until you can make any sort of plan.

So we were going to take her advice. After I survived another car ride together. Me and Dimitri. All alone. Again.

So far the car ride had been… silent, as far as conversation went. But it was loud in terms of tension, panic, adrenaline and unsaid I-told-you-sos. I felt like I was about snap from it all at any time. Blow up. Cry. Beat something to a pulp. Preferably Jas. I can't believe I kissed that jackass traitor. I didn't care if he still had a duty to help the Moroi and Dhampir world. All I felt was darkness fuelling my desire to shred something to pieces. We had no leads beside a state. No names. No place to stay. No one to trust. I worried about the Belikov's and what damage I had caused for them. Would they be punished? Surely they couldn't do such a thing if they pleaded that they didn't know we were fugitives. Maybe they'd play dumb and think Dimitri and his little friend were visiting. God, I hoped they were okay. And I sure hoped Viktoria beat the stuffing out of Jas. Hopefully she wouldn't get jailed for that… I wish I could beat the stuffing out of Jas. After I was finished with Jas, I would move to Adrian. I'd slowly skin the bastard and let him bleed to death (thanks twilighternproud). It was all his fault really. He could have kept his mouth shut if he wanted to. I bet he secretly wanted to let slip were I was hiding anyways. Revenge. My fists tightened, my knuckles turning white. I was so pissed, angry. At Jas, at Adrian, at Dimitri for being a stubborn ass, at the world for being so unfair.

I started taking slow, deep breaths. I need to stay in control. I gripped the handle of the door, tried to concentrate on the sound of dirt crunching beneath the tires as Dimitri drove.

Dimitri. Such an ass. Why couldn't he just say 'I told you so' already? He had been right about Jas, how he couldn't be trusted. Mind you, if Dimitri hadn't been so… aggravating I wouldn't have had to even deal with Jas. It was Dimitri's fault he slipped. If he hadn't been so jealous, there would have been no piss fights, no need to worry about my safety in a fight of two Dhampirs. No need. His fault. Darkness welled up. I wanted to yell at him. I wanted to punch him. Instead I punched the glove box, leaving a small dent in it and a smarting red mark on my knuckle.

Dimitri swerved, looking alarmed at my sudden over flow in emotion. He straightened the car and asked me, "What's wrong?"

"Everything," I growled. "Everything is wrong." My hands started to shake and I gripped them tighter, trying to stop them. Another deep breath. It didn't calm me. In fact, it just gave me more air to say the following, "There is no one out there who I don't regret trusting. All you men are inconsiderate traitors." At least I had half a mind to not look at Dimitri because I knew if I did I would either snap and punch his traitorous face or end up getting punched myself.

"Rose," he said calmly. "How's Lissa been lately?"

His question confused me. Why the hell wasn't he angry? His calmness pissed me off more. But, right, Lissa. Always about her. "Oh? You're little Princess? Oh, she's great. Got a hell of a lot better control than me with my anger and world realization. Bet you're happy to know that once you get back to her you won't have to deal with my attitude."

He sighed and pulled over. "Rose, get out of the car."

"What? You just gonna kick me to the curb?"

"There's no curb. It's dirt and grass. Not curb." I yelled in outrage and, still not looking at him, crawled out and slammed the door. I stomped to the nearest tree and started punching it, not caring about shredding my hands. Anger. Pain. Betrayal. Darkness. Hate. Fear. Panic. I punched again, releasing some emotion. A tear rolled down my face, letting some out. My vision was red. Everything was red, like it was laced with blood. Like my blood was lacing the tree. The pain felt nice. An absolute in a world of uncertainties.

I heard feet crunch behind me and I turned quickly, ending in a fighting stance. I saw Dimitri, his hands up in a surrender position. Idiot, he's leaving himself open. I took a step and threw a punch at his face, one that landed hard against his cheek bone since he moved last second to avoid a broken nose. Before I could even blink, I was facing the tree again. The one that was stained with my blood. Gentle hands encircled my wrists, pulling them back from punching him from behind. They uncurled my fists, slipping their fingers in between mine, holding them from behind me. I felt warm breath on my ear and I leaned towards it, craving the touch. "Shh, Roza. Let it go. This isn't you. Just listen to my words." I resisted the urge to break out of the hold and put him on his ass, instead doing as he said and listened to his words over the pounding of my heart in my ears. My muscles trembled, needing to hit something. I clenched them, telling them to shut up. I squished Dimitri's fingers between my own, breathing in ragged breaths. He didn't flinch, instead he held me closer. "Calm down, Rose. This is the darkness. Lissa's, not yours." His breath sent some stray hairs towards my cheek, tickling it. I shivered. More tears fell down my face. I hated them all. I wanted to kill them. And here I was, in the arms of someone I hated. I love you, I whispered to him inside my head. I wanted to say it. I wanted to hear it back. But I couldn't bear the inevitable rejection. Jas had done nothing to help in the long run and he wasn't here to keep Dimitri on his toes.

I ripped my hands from his, kneeling to the ground. Sobs racked my body. I was so scared, so helpless. There was no hope. I would be out in the world forever hiding, forever running. I would die in dishonour. Forever remembered as the girl who killed the Queen. And I couldn't even live as a fugitive in happiness. I'd be with a guy who didn't love me. Maybe I'd make friends who didn't know my real name or know anything real about me. Maybe I'd live a fake life. Maybe I'd find some sort of happiness. But it would all be fake. Dimitri pulled me close, resting my head in his lap. The tears were gone now and we just laid there, me with my face to the blue sky, eyes closed, and Dimitri running his fingers through my hair. My heart slowed, my muscles relaxed but I didn't move. I wanted to freeze this moment and keep it in my heart forever.

My heart ached. My hand ached. My head ached.

Dimitri picked my shredded hand up and looked at it closely. "We need to clean this up." He stood up, hauling me with him. I felt embarrassed but I continued after him, sitting on the passenger seat as he pulled out a first aid kit and started washing my wounds. It stung but I didn't complain. He wrapped my hands in some sports wrap since no band-aid was big enough or able to stay on. Dimitri climbed in the car after he was done playing Doctor and started driving again. I pressed my cheek against the cold window, my mind drifting off and sleep consumed me.

And so we were off to Colorado again. Good thing we still had hours to make it to the airport.

Customs was long, slow and brutal. I beeped through the metal detector because I forgot I was wearing a wire-rimmed bra (very embarrassing) and then after we landed I got my luggage checked because I got unlucky with the button. The security didn't care for my stake much.

We arrived at the cheap motel Sydney had booked for us in Denver late at night (human time). I felt drained, tired. All these sudden life changes were really starting to take their toll on me. Nevermind the impending jet lag. All I wanted to do was snuggle into a warm bed and be done with them all. I wanted to be back with Lissa where the only worry was weither or not fifty Guardians was enough for a shopping trip. Dimitri, too seemed tired and restless. He must be worried about his family, maybe about his future, just like I was.

We stumbled into the room, throwing our bags to the side of the room and tumbling onto the first bed we saw. I took in no other surroundings other than the comfy bed, warmed by Dimitri's heat as he unconsciously wrapped his arms around me. I took in his sweet scent, the hard yet soft muscles pressed against me. His chest evenly rose up and down softly, proving that he was asleep. If he wasn't, wouldn't his heart be hammering like mine?

I fell asleep in heaven.

XXX

"Dimitriiii," I whined, "I'm bored."

"Then find something to entertain yourself."

We'd said the exact same things for the past… 5, 6 hours? I was lying on one bed by the window and he was on the other (turned out there was two beds. It made the fact that we slept in one that much more novel) in the exact same position, staring at the ceiling. And we were, well, bored. I had many ideas of what to do with him but he immediately shut me down on those.

"Wanna go to a club or something? I haven't danced for a while."

"Didn't I tell you -" He took a look at my face, saw my puppy dog eyes and caved. "Fine! We'll go. But if we get recognised, it's your head."

"Literally. But who cares? I've changed my hair, again," red this time, "so no one should automatically recognise me. And there's going to be tons of people there. And who's going to expect us to be here anyways? Not even Lissa knows where we are now. There's no one to give us away."

"I said you can go already."

I jumped up from my bed, leaping over to his, and gave him a hug. "Thanks, Comrade!" And before he could say anything else, I was grabbing clothes and slamming the bathroom door shut.

We arrived (I managed to drag Dimitri along, despite his continuous complaints) and stood amongst the crowd of young adults and older adults having a bad day waiting to get in. Now, neither of us had ID we could give him that didn't danger us in one way or another so we relying on the fact that I, maybe, looked over 21. We reached the front of the line and Dimitri slipped through with a glare at the bouncer who was about to ask for his ID and then thought better of it. No glare stopped the bouncer from sticking an arm out to stop me though. "ID please." I pretended to look through my purse while eyeing Dimitri, hoping he'd somehow sneak me in.

He stuck his head back out, "She's with me," and grabbed my arm, pulling me through, before the bouncer could say anything.

"Wow, Dimitri, I thought you'd use my not getting in as an excuse to stay huddled in the safety of the motel room."

"You need to stay active, even if it means dancing. I don't need you punching out walls. I'd have to pay for them."

"Nah, Syd would. She paid for our room so the damages would get forwarded to her."

"And then she wouldn't help you anymore."

I didn't respond, instead taking in the feel of the vibrating beat beneath my feet and the warm, dancing bodies surrounding me. I threw my arms up and started moving to the beat, losing myself in noise. Any words were incomprehensible in the loudness. It had been so long since I'd been to a club, or a dance where I could just let go. Dimitri was beside me, dancing awkwardly. "I thought you knew how to dance?" I asked, shouted, at him.

"I know how to dance, not grind against people I don't know and act like I don't think it's weird."

I rolled my eyes. "Just let your body move to the music. And I'm not grinding, I just happen to bump into others while I'm dancing…" I grabbed his arms and moved them to my waist and then brought my arms into the air. I moved my hips side to side to the beat of the music. "At least you don't look like a loser now." And all the girls who were staring at you, about to come over, are backing off. He sighed and followed the movements of my hips. I smiled at his defeat and he just rolled his eyes. The large amount of people around us made it so our bodies had to be basically squished together so I lowered my arms around his neck to save him from getting a front seat to my armpits.

At some point in the night, he'd finally loosened up enough that I didn't have to guide his every movement and he started to have fun. Yes, I know, 'Dimitri' and 'having fun' in the same sentence is absurd but it was true. Hell, maybe he was just getting high from breathing the same air as the junkies at the back of the club. Dimitri deemed it safe enough to have a drink so he bought us each one. It didn't seem to affect him at all. Damn Russians.

We left about three hours later, tumbling into our room laughing our heads off at some joke I said on the way up the stairs. We were holding hands to keep each other up as we were clutching our stomachs and loosing balance every other second. A drink had turned into two…and then five. We were lucky no Strigoi attacked.

Dimitri fumbled with the key a dozen times before managing to get it into the lock and we fell into the room. I tripped over Dimitri's foot, sending us both sprawling onto the bed, him on top of me. All laughing stopped. My hand caressed his face and he brought it closer to mine. "Roza…" he sighed. His eyes fluttered closed, as did mine, and I waited for an intense second.

Knock, knock, knock. "Did you not put up the "Please do not disturb" sign?"

Not many of you guys actually sent in how you'd beat anyone slowly to death so I guess I might have to wait for some more to accumulate?

Some people are saying they want this story to last a while and I already have something mapped out that would start the process of wrapping it up (starting next chapter).
BUT! If it is to be longer I need some extended plot ideas that can be used immediately for the next chapter.
Problems, conflicts, ideas anything would be useful.
Come on, use those creative minds of yours.
The length of this story depends on it!
And my minds all pooped out right now D:

xoxo Darla