A/N Sorry it took so long, but I don't have the internet so it's hard to update, this chapter will hopefully let you see Edwards POV.
Hope you like it please review....I really love reading them....
Disclaimer- I don't Twilight :(
x.x.x
Chapter 3
I'm not crazy...Right?
Why am I, the only sane member of my family waiting to see a counsellor? My family think they are animals and I am the one seeking professional help when they are at home most likely running around the house like idiots.
Mean while back in the Cullen's
Esme, Carlisle, Rosalie, Emmett, Alice, Jasper and Bella are running around the house like idiots.
Just as I was about to walk out of the waiting area the receptionist behind the desk caught my attention, as I looked up at her she beckoned me that I came up to her desk, she was thinking a whole load of nonsense, like how cool it would be to get me to go on a date with her and how her friends would react if she walked into a bar with me, I had to let her know that I was taken even if the love of my eternity thought that she was a sheep. So as I walked towards her I made sure she caught sight of my wedding ring and when she seen it her mind got back to work
"How can I help you sir?"
"I wanted to book an appointment"
Emphasising the past tense 'wanted'
"Ok, Name? Sorry wanted to make an appointment?"
"Yes....wanted"
"And you now don't?"
"Do I look crazy to you?"
"No sir"
"Do I look like an animal to you?"
She had let her imagination spiral out of control again, she was thinking
"You definitely do not look like an animal, more a Greek god, or an Angel or you would make an excellent stripper....I wonder what you look like naked.......O wait he's still waiting on an answer..."
I nearly laughed at her thoughts
"No sir, you don't look like an animal"
"Do I act like an animal?"
Her thoughts again were getting carried away
"No you don't but I bet you are quite an animal in bed.........crap still waiting on an answer"
This woman had a weird imagination, she was easily distracted
"No sir, you don't act like an animal either"
Ok I really can't have any more of her fantasies
"Ok... thank you I'm cured; you're a brilliant councillor, good bye"
I was never so happy to see the inside of my Volvo, I was also looking forward to going home to see my wife even though she thinks she is a sheep she's still my Bella.
As I drive in the lane to our house Alice wants to go to the cinema, Bella wants to see Harry Potter, and Emmett just wants to buy popcorn even thought he won't eat it. So I walk in through the front door and I am met by Bella
"Are you ok, I know you may feel a little strange, but it's ok I'll still love you even if you are a nutter, I'll protect you from your silly imagination after all I am Super Sheep"
"Super Sheep, go get Esme Kitten, Sexy Peacock and Chipmunk Cullen Vampire Human and tell them we are going to see Harry Potter!"
"Alice where is Esme, Rosalie and Emmett?"
"O Edward, you really have lost your marbles you have to call us by our proper names, let me go over them for you in case you don't understand Princess Pixie that's me ok, Esme Kitten which in case you are still confused that is Esme, and Chipmunk Cullen Vampire Human is Emmett ok did you get all that?"
Jasper came running up to Alice
"Edward lost his marbles? How terrible....."
He began to cry,
"What is up with you?"
"I'm so sorry for you that you lost your marbles, I never knew you liked marbles"
He ran off crying, I think that Jasper was turning emo.
They are treating me like I am a mental patient, I really am going to have a break down, I may very well be the first Vampire in Vampire history to have a mental breakdown, I may also be the first Vampire in Vampire history to have a family that think they are animals
"I'm not going crazy"
Carlisle had came to stand beside me he was holding Panda teddy bears
"This my colleges is a common case of Vampiric Paranoia it happens when A mind Reading Vampire gets confused and thinks that he is in a normal state of mind when actually he is having a break down, even though to him it seems as if he is the only normal vampire when in fact he is the one with the problem"
"Carlisle I'm not going crazy, I'm not having a breakdown and I don't have Vampiric Paranoia!"
Alice was on my other side
"Edward am I going to have to correct you all day that is Peter Panda, wait maybe some pixie dust will help...."
Alice was throwing tons of sugar all over me and as it was hitting my skin it tickled, then Bella was at my side
"I'll save you from the evil pixie dust"
"Super Sheep, Princess Pixie's pixie dust is not evil; it makes people have a sweeter side!"
Ok maybe I am having a break down, this is not my fault, maybe this is all one big daydream and I am actually still in the meadow with Bella and any moment now I will snap out of it and I will come home to find my normal family......waiting......waiting.......waiting
THUMP
"What was that for?"
"Edward you were repeating the same word.....waiting"
"Baaaabe what are you waiting for?"
"To wake up, because I am day dreaming and me and you are in our meadow and all this animal business isn't really happening"
THUMP
"Edward you are really getting on my nerves, have you booked another counselling session yet?"
"I don't need counselling Alice, you do all of you, I'm fine, I am Edward Anthony Masen Cullen a Vampire married to Isabella Marie Swan Masen Cullen, Father of Renesme Carlie Masen Cullen Black, Father in law to Jacob Black, brother to Jasper and Alice Hale, and Emmett and Rosalie Cullen and son to Carlisle and Esme Cullen I am not pretending to be an animal, I don't need help, I'm not a chipmunk or a pixie or a panda or a fox or a kitten or a peacock or a sheep"
At this rate I will be booking myself into the nearest mental home, not because I'm losing my mind but that it will get me away from my family. Alice wanted to go to the cinema, but I didn't want to leave the house with them, and Bella wouldn't go if I didn't so Alice wouldn't go if she didn't neither would Rosalie, Jasper wouldn't go because Alice wasn't going and Emmett wouldn't go because Jasper wasn't going, and Carlisle and Esme wouldn't go because none of us were going. Alice switched on the TV to see if there were any movies on, but the news channel was on and the headlines read
"2 reported cases of Swine Flu in Forks Washington"
Carlisle was sitting around the dining table with his pandas, discussing the best way to treat all of Forks from the Swine Flu, agreeing on recruiting more pandas, Emmett ran around the house screaming
"We're going to die"
Then Alice joined in
"We're going to catch the Swine Flu and die"
Bella was running around like a lunatic
"Swine Flu in Forks what next? Junkie Vampires?"
Then Emmett's attention was diverted, he was thinking about getting high on drugs, and then he was thinking about getting high on Swine Flu medication drugs.
I had taken enough,
"Emmett Alice, we can't catch Swine Flu because we're Vampires and we can't die"
Emmett screamed louder
"The Swine Flu's going to catch us.....and is going to torcher us for eternity"
I give up...either I'm going into a mental institute or my family is.
A/N seriously hoped you liked it....I'm kind of running out of ideas....your ideas are very welcome
Thanks for the reviews so far they are totally awesome...thank you
Please review this chapter....
x.x.x