CHAPTER SEVENTEEN:

Shotgun

"Yes!" Mike crowed as Puck's head exploded off his shoulders in a glorious spray of dark red blood. "Take it bitch!"

Puck glared at the television screen where his character had collapsed to the ground, next to his detached head. "Fuck you Chang." He growled, tossing his controller at his friend.

"No." Mike grinned, shifting his head to avoid the incoming plastic object. "Fuck you. You're just pissed, because the Changster owned your ass." And with that statement Mike jumped up onto the couch and began his most obnoxious victory dance.

Puck just rolled his eyes and looked over at Matt. "You want a go, man?"

"Yeah, Rutherford," Mike flexed his arms and kissed his own biceps, one at a time, "you couldn't be worse than Captain Second Base over here."

Matt snickered; he and Mike had been busting Puck's balls all day about not getting past second base with Rachel the night before. "I told you," Puck growled "we were sliding solidly into third when you two fuckers showed up."

"Sure you were." Mike smirked.

"You're a dick."

"You're just jealous 'cause I actually get to use my dick." The Asian retorted.

"Fuck you, Other Asian." Puck replied.

"No," Mike grinned, dropping back onto the couch and chucking Puck's controller back at him, "I fuck Brittany. You fuck no one."

The mohawked jock's eyes narrowed "You're lucky you don't have a pool Chang."

Mike grimaced "One step too far, man. No cougar jokes about my mom." Puck opened up his mouth to say something else and Mike just glared at him. "Or my sister."

Puck smirked and looked over at Matt. "One word about the fact that you've fucked my girlfriend and I'll kick your ass."

"Whatever."

"What's got your panties in a twist anyway?" Mike asked as he and Puck restarted their video game.

"Do you guys know anything about Rachel, Britt and Santana going to Victoria's Secret yesterday?"

Mike paused the game and looked over at his friend "What?"

"That's what I said." Then both of them looked over at Matt, who couldn't keep the satisfied grin off his face. "You know something." Puck accused.

"Hell yeah, I know something." Matt replied, his grin widening.

"Out with it!" Mike demanded.

Matt was about to reply when his cell phone went off. He frowned when he read Santana's text message.

"What's up dude?" Puck asked.

"We gotta go meet the girls at the movies."

"Why?"

"San just texted me, I guess Finn and Quinn showed up."

This time Puck frowned, he didn't like the way his supposed best friend continued to moon over his girlfriend. "Have I ever mentioned how stupid it is that their names rhyme?" He asked darkly.

Mike chuckled as Matt continued "Apparently Finn's being himself, staring longingly at Rachel while catering to Quinn's every whim. And Quinn's got her hyped up, pregnant hormones set to super bitch and she's aiming them at Rachel."

"Son of a bitch…" Puck muttered throwing down his controller and starting for his basement stairs. "What are you fuckers waiting for, an engraved invitation? Let's go."

Matt turned off the TV as he and Mike scrambled after their friend. This was gonna be interesting.

"Why did we all have to drive in the same car?" Mike asked as he shifted uncomfortably in the middle seat of the cab of Puck's truck.

"Because" Puck grinned as he tried to hit the lanky teen in the junk with the shifter "you know, the environment and that shit…" Mike glared at him "Oh yeah, and you suck."

Matt laughed as Puck sped up and tried to hit Mike with the shifter again. "So what movie are we seeing?" Mike asked after a moment of just glaring at his two friends.

Matt frowned, "I don't know, I'll text San."

Mike began fidgeting when silence descended on the truck again; absentmindedly he leaned forward to turn on the radio. "Touch the radio and die Chang."

"Forgot whose car I was in for a minute." Mike said quickly holding his hands up in surrender. Puck just placed his hand threateningly on the shifter and glared at him in the rearview mirror.

"I bet you let Rachel play with your radio." Matt waggled his eyebrows, feeling safe on the other side of the cab. Puck gave him the finger then jerked the steering wheel, making a sharp turn into the theater's parking lot. "Ow, dude!" Matt whined when Mike slid across the seat and crashed into him, causing him to be smashed up against the truck's door. "That fucking hurt."

Puck smirked as he pulled into a parking space "Yeah, well you assholes deserved it. So what movie are we seeing?"

Matt grumbled as he pulled out his phone, his grumbles turned into a groan when he read his girlfriend's latest text message. "Fuckin' chick flick."

"Dammit." Mike swore "Why do I feel like we got played?"

Santana and Rachel were standing side by side in the lobby leaning against a wall, the former pissed off by the way Quinn was glaring at her and the latter uncomfortable with the way Finn was staring at her. Brittany was oblivious to the whole situation because she was desperately trying to decide between popcorn and nachos- it was a tough decision because the nacho smell didn't make Rachel want to throw up, but she really wanted popcorn.

Santana straightened up when she spotted Puck, Matt, and Mike enter the building, but her relief in seeing them quickly turned into exasperation as she watched Mike attempt to trip Puck and Puck -not tripping- retaliated by pushing Mike into a display. Puck and Matt laughed when both the movie display and the Asian boy crashed to the ground.

Rachel looked up at the sound of the crash and sent Santana a questioning glance. The Latina just shook her head "Boys."

A brilliant smile spread across Brittany's face when she realized Mike was there. "Mike!" She flounced over to her boyfriend. "Why are you on the floor?"

Mike grinned at his girlfriend as he struggled to his feet. "Hey Britt." He kissed the blonde hello "I was on the floor because Puck's an asshole."

The blonde looked over at Puck and shrugged her shoulders "Okay. Come help me decide what to eat." Mike gave his friends the finger as he walked with Brittany to the concession stand and listened amusedly to her popcorn/nacho dilemma.

Puck and Matt continued over to where their own girlfriends were waiting, Matt laughing at Brittany's easy acceptance of Mike's explanation and Puck fuming over it.

"Hey babe," Puck greeted Rachel wrapping an arm around her and leaning down to give her a brief kiss, "how you feeling?"

Rachel smiled tentatively -very aware of Finn and Quinn's eyes on her- "Queasy, but better. What happened to Michael? Why was he on the floor?"

Puck and Matt both chuckled "He tripped." Matt grinned.

"Yeah," Puck added "you know how clumsy that guy is."

Rachel frowned "I've never known him to be clumsy. In fact, I've never seen him be anything other than extremely graceful; he is a very skilled dancer-"

"Yeah Berry," Puck cut off his girlfriend, leading her towards the concession line "we all know how skilled he is."

Santana looked up at her own boyfriend, with a sparkle in her eyes, as Quinn stomped off –pissed off she was being ignored, no doubt- Finn following behind her like a puppy. "I'm not sure whether I'm ashamed to be dating a stooge or proud that you're the smartest one."

Matt laughed, he really liked the playful side Rachel seemed to bring out in his girlfriend, then he wrapped his arm around her waist and followed Puck and Rachel towards the food. "It's probably best not to think about it."

"That movie was a piece of shit." Puck declared as the eight teens left the theater –Quinn and Finn had sat with the others simply because Brittany had asked them to and it was hard to deny the naïve blonde anything.

"I liked it." Brittany decided, sucking at her soda "It was happy."

"Britt," Rachel said delicately "it was only happy at the end the rest was horribly depressing and rather badly acted."

"It was?"

Santana nodded "You probably would've noticed if you and Mike hadn't been sucking face the whole time."

The blonde just shrugged "Oh well, I had a good time."

"Me too." Mike agreed.

Quinn turned to Finn; all the happy-go-lucky fluff was giving her a migraine "Take me home, Finn." She demanded then she sent Brittany and Mike a pointed glare "All of a sudden I feel nauseous." Finn nodded goodbye to the others and led Quinn towards his car.

"Bye Quinn!" Brittany yelled at the retreating couple. "Hope you feel better!"

No one bothered to fill her in on what she was missing this time.

"You guys wanna come back to my place?" Puck asked the remaining teens.

Mike and Matt shrugged their agreement while Rachel, Santana, and Brittany exchanged glances. "We're going back to Berry's place." Santana decided "We're going to empty her closet of all animal sweaters and plaid skirts."

"And facials." Brittany added cheerfully.

"Not all the skirts." Puck said, a stricken look on his face. "You know how I feel about the skirts."

"Not all the skirts." Rachel agreed, leaning up to give him a kiss.

And with that the three girls were on their way to Rachel's car, leaving Puck, Mike and Matt standing in the parking lot. "So," Puck smirked, jingling his keys in his hand, "who's sitting bitch?"

Mike and Matt looked at each other "Shotgun!"

Puck laughed to himself as his friend's pushed and shoved at each other in a race towards his truck. "Suckers."