Chapter 4

2 month later

Cate

I had fallen into a tedious routine, drink and then sleep. I took some time off from work I couldn't be around Ryan right now. I was avoiding Baze, Lux spent most of her time at his loft because I was just no fun to be around. I didn't like to talk about anything and most of the time I just cried.

It was Saturday I decided to lay in bed all day much like the last four Saturdays that had passed.

Lux

"Baze I really think you need to go over there and do something. She won't listen to me. She wont even talk to me most days" I was worried about Cate. She wasn't her normal self I didn't want to see her destroy her life over Ryan. He wasn't worth it.

"okay and what would you like me to say kiddo? I try to call her but she doesn't answer" he didn't think he could help at all but I knew he could if he tried.

"maybe she just needs someone to you know comfort her please" I begged him I didn't know what else to do.

"okay I'll try but I can't promise anything. Do you need a ride to Jones today? Or do you just want to take that car right there?" I looked out the window to see which car Baze was talking about. I didn't recognize it, it was a two door red mustang.

"who's car is that Baze?" I was confused.

He smiled and handed me keys. "it's yours. You've been doing a great job in school, I'm really proud of how you've been lately" he hugged me as I squealed with excitement.

"thank you thank you thank you" I was so happy that I would finally be able to drive places without having to ask for permission to use Baze's car.

"I'll be back later. Drive safe and shoot me a text when you get to Jones alright" and with that Baze was gone to try to rescue Cate. She really needed it.

Baze

I knocked on her door but she didn't answer so I grabbed her spare key that was hidden under the flower pot. I shut the door gently behind me before I walked down the hall towards her room. The house was a mess, there was empty wine bottles scattered in the living room and as I made my way closer to her room I started seeing empty liquor bottles that's when I knew that she really needed to stop this before it became to deep.

"Cate" I called her name quietly. She was asleep on the bed, or maybe she was passed out from being drunk. It was so sad to see her like this it was 11 A.M and she was still in bed. I sat down beside her. I moved her tangled hair from her face.

"Cate wake up" I gave her a shake and her eyes fluttered a few times before they were wide open.

"Baze what are you doing here?" her voice was still raspy from sleep.

"I came to get you to snap out of this sweetie" I moved back a little as she sat up and leaned over the side of the bed throwing up onto her floor. It was then I realized she must have done this often from the look of the stains.

"I don't feel so well" she mumbled before laying back down.

"Cate lets get you up and get you showered okay? I'll clean up this mess while your in the shower" I helped her out of bed and towards the bathroom.

"my eyes hurt" she closed her eyes as she took a seat on the edge of the tub.

Cate

I couldn't even walk in a straight line and he expected me to shower myself. My head was throbbing and all I could think about was my next drink. Maybe I had a problem.

I attempted to undress myself but ended up falling, well almost falling Baze caught me. I smiled for the first time in a month. "Thank you" I whispered lifting my arms in the air for him to help me take my shirt off.

He just starred at me almost like he was afraid to take my shirt off which was odd because he had done it before. "help me please"

He nodded and did as I asked. He pulled my shirt off of me and tossed it in the over flowing hamper.

After I was stripped of my shirt and pants he turned on the water. I watched it fall into the tub and disappear down the drain. Baze turned to leave the room and I stopped him.

"stay please" I begged him with my eyes.

"I told you I'm going to clean, I'm not going anywhere. If you need help call and I'll be right in" he smiled reassuringly at me but I wasn't so sure.

"you promise" I was so afraid of him leaving me right now and I couldn't figure out why.

"promise now clean yourself up. No offense you smell" he held his nose as he left the bathroom.

I climbed into the shower and slowly washed myself, washed away my worries fears, and most important the smell of alcohol off my body. A part of me wanted Baze to shower with me, it's been so long since I've done anything like that but it was clear that he didn't want to. I kept the shower as short as possible. When I emerged from the bed room this time I was my old self. I felt a little more sober and a little happier.

"there's my girl" it came out of his mouth so naturally I really almost believed I was his girl. I sat down on his lap and laid my head against him.

"thank you. You have no idea how much I needed this" I could feel his breath on the back on my neck. My wet hair was soaking his shirt but still he wrapped his arms around me holding me tightly.

"anything for you" his lips pressed against the back of my neck.

"why did you come?"

"to help you. I missed seeing you and Lux she is really worried about you"

I sat up and looked into his eyes as he spoke to me.

"how is she. I haven't seen her all week" I sounded kind of sad again. Not over Ryan this time but because of Lux.

"she is good, I got her a car, she is out with Jones they are dating now" Baze filled me in on what I had missed while I was drunk.

"wow her own car. She must be happy with you" I felt a tinge of jealousy because he was there for Lux when I havent been.

"tomorrow the three of us should do something as a family"

I nodded with a smile "I'd love that"

I could have laid against him forever but forever always comes to an end.

"I'm going to finish cleaning sweetie you lay here and rest" he lifted me off his lap and placed me back down on the couch.

My eyes followed Baze as he cleaned up the various bottles I was grateful that he was helping me.

It took him an hour to clean up my house, it was once again looking like my home. After he threw the final bag out he came and sat next to me again. Without hesitation I climbed back into his lap. "why hello there" he smirked at me. "I just want you to hold me okay. Please" I pleaded my voice sounded like I was weak, but I wasn't weak I was stronger then all of this.

Baze made us dinner at seven. He wasn't much of a cook but you cant really screw up pasta. "dinners done" he stuck his head into the living room. I stood up and walked into the dinning room I was feeling a little better. "smells good" I complimented. "thanks" he pulled my chair out for me before taking his own seat.

"when is Lux coming home?" I asked in between bites of my food it was a lot better then anything I could make.

"she said she would be here at ten, she is going to spend the night and so am I. tomorrow morning we are going to Oaks amusement park tomorrow" he smiled brightly at me. His smile helped lift my spirits.

"who is going?" I replied washing my pasta down with the water Baze provided.

"Lux, and Jones we are going to visit Tasha on the way. So you better sleep good tonight because you are going on every rollercoaster they have with me"

I raised an eyebrow at him "I'm afraid of heights, that's not going to happen" shaking my head no.

"I'll hold your hand, you'll be fine" I knew this was a fight I was going to end up losing.

I attempted to do the dishes after we finished dinner but Baze sent me back into the living room to watch tv while he finished the dishes.

I must have flipped through the channels five times before he was finished, there was nothing good to watch. "so what do you want to do now?" it was nice having someone around I had been so lonely. "watch a movie or something maybe we could take a walk get you out of this house" his fingers ran through my hair, I had laid my head down on his lap. "that would be nice" I got up to go find my jacket and shoes.

Baze

Cate finally seemed like she was back to her normal self. She even agreed to take a walk. There was a full moon tonight and the weather wasn't terrible so I knew a walk by the river would be good for her. It didn't take her long to get ready and five minutes later we were outside the warmer air hitting us as we strolled along. "where do you want to walk to?" I was letting this night be about her, anything she wanted I'd try to give her.

"how about the park" she suggested I didn't expect her to reach for my hand but she did. With a real smile she looked up at me, I nodded my head to let her know I agreed the park would be great.

What should have been a great evening turned out to be horrible. As we were walking along the path near the water from the distance I could see the shadow of a couple with a baby coach walking towards us. I watched her hold her breath. I could tell she was hoping it wouldn't be Ryan.

"lets sit" she led me to the bench that was to the right of us. "good idea" we sat in silence as the couple came to a stop in front of the water. The way the moon shined down on them I could see that it was Ryan. I tried to get Cate's attention but it wasn't going to happen, she was staring at them.

"Cate, you haven't been at work I've been worried" Ryan approached the bench, I felt her hand squeeze mine tighter. "I've been sick" she lied lowering her eyes to the ground.

Cate

It killed me to see him with his family. A part of me wanted to go see the baby but I knew it would only make me feel worse. I wanted to scream when he approached us. It was extremely hard to look at him.

"Julia had the baby. I tried to call you to tell you but you never answered" he pointed out the obvious. "I can see that, boy or girl?" I really could have cared less but I was trying to be nice to him. "a boy, we named him Cayden" he sounded so proud and so happy. "well congrats but I really have to get going, me and Baze are going to an amusement park with Lux tomorrow and we need our sleep" I paused and looked at Baze "lets go" he didn't say anything just stood up still holding onto my hand. "well it's been nice seeing you again, when will you be coming back to work?" he moved closer to me. I wanted to run but I tried to remain calm "I'll be back Monday morning" I wasn't going to let him think he ruined my life anymore I was taking back my life.

"well give me a call sometime, we can get lunch on Monday?" he gave me a hug even though I was still holding Baze's hand. I tensed up in his arms, this once felt so right to have his arms around me now it felt wrong.

When we got back to my house I sighed sitting down on the couch. Baze sat next to me. "you okay?" he knew I wasn't but he asked anyway. "I'm fine, I'm going to be fine. It's good to see him so happy" I was lying and we both knew it but he pretended to believe me. I took my jacket off and walked towards the kitchen. "want a drink?" I turned waiting for him to answer. Instead he pulled me back towards the couch "not starting this again, sit down I'll make you some tea" he practically forced me to sit down, but I really didn't mind I needed him to take care of me.

"Lux should be home any minute" I called into the kitchen. "I know, she missed you but she just couldn't stand to see you drinking all the time" he tried explaining why she hadn't been around. "I know" I fell silent waiting for him to join me in the living room again. In a few minutes the front door opened. Lux walked in slowly like it was her first time being here. "it's good to see you" I hugged her immediately. "it's good to see you awake, and clean" she laughed squeezing back for a second before letting go and heading towards the stairs to her room. "going to bed already? You don't want to watch a movie?" I pouted I wanted her to spend time with us. "we have a long day tomorrow you should go to sleep too" she smiled continuing to walk up the stairs to the attic.

"here is your tea, she is right drink that and then you should go to sleep" he handed me the cup and I nodded. I really didn't want to go to sleep but they were right. I took a sip of the tea before setting it down on the table. Baze sat down next to me, he sounded exhausted. "so this couch is pretty much not good for sleeping on. So you want to stay in my room?" it was just a suggestion he didn't have to accept it. "sure I could do that" he sounded unsure but I hoped he wanted to.

I finished my tea and we headed into my room. "is everything okay?" I turned over so I was facing him. He seemed like he was nervous or something. "just a little tired that's all. Now go to sleep" Baze pulled the blanket up covering his bare chest. "I'm not really tired" I confessed moving closer to him. I laid my head on his chest. "well just close your eyes and try" his fingers ran through my hair and down my back gently. "goodnight" I leaned up and kissed his cheek. I wanted to kiss him but I didn't want to if he didn't want to. If he really wanted to kiss me he would have right?