Until I Find The Light
Chapter 2
Coming back to an empty home wasn't exactly the best possible scenario for a pink-haired lady. Though she was able to leave the house, it didn't mean she had moved on. Still, that depressed feeling was there.
But upon reflecting on those days that they sacrificed so that she could graduate with flying colors and also achieve what she had always wanted, she realized that she had to be there. She had to do her job, the profession she chose herself. She then remembered that she had to separate personal life from the profession she had chosen. It would be hard and painful, as well, but that was the way it should be. And she knew it since the day she started her medical studies.
She dropped lifelessly on their bed and there, she laid the same way she had the days before. Out of duty to save lives, she had put aside that feeling, which kept eating her from inside. And out of duty, she had to forget even for some time all that had something to do with her late husband.
Sakura's green orbs lost their brightness and were filled with pure…sadness.
Neji watched her and that was all he could do. He was a lost soul then. And it was true, very true.
He walked to the far corner of the room across the window of the room. The light of the full moon was giving luminescence to the whole bedroom. It gave a solemn atmosphere to the whole room and even Neji in his state felt a peaceful yet sad feeling in his heart just then.
He sat crossed-legs, his head tilted upwards, as he stared at the ceiling. He could still remember when Sakura insisted that they paint it navy blue for a reason he never knew of. And later he discovered that she wanted to put glow-in-the-dark in the shape of stars, some big and some small.
He loved that childish side of her. At that age, she even thought of glow-in-the-darks. She was too childlike, too innocent. That was her best asset, her naïveté.
After a while, he heard a stifling sound from the bed where his wife was. He stood up quickly, feeling worried all so suddenly. He watched the pink-haired woman from across the room and found that she was crying again. It had been days since she had stopped crying.
Looking around, he saw the fancy-looking calendar on her dresser and a number was marked with a red permanent marker.
Thinking deeply of that very important date, he remembered immediately…it was after all…their anniversary.
The weight in her heart was increased when she realized what day it was. A month before, she was planning on giving him a wonderful dinner and, of course, with their only little girl. But everything fell into pieces on the death of her husband.
Still, she couldn't get past the acceptance stage…
Neji stood strongly even though his weak soul was slowly losing every little thing keeping him intact. How could he go when his wife was also slowly dying? How could he leave when he had a little girl without her mother? How could he go when even he refuses to go?
Sakura gripped the sheets in her frail fingers and then she cried harder. She cried and cried like she was never getting tired of it. And from afar, all Neji could do was stay by her side, even if she didn't know. Even if she couldn't see him…Even if he couldn't hold her then…
"Where are you, Neji?" she mumbled in her sleep.
Sleep had conquered her after crying all night. It had been sunrise when she finally fell asleep. Her eyes were all red and puffy from crying. Though her cheeks had already dried off, still, the sign of sadness and grief was present in her lovely face.
She woke up from the pounding on the door of the mansion and she slowly made her way towards the door. She touched the doorknob and heaved out a gentle sigh. Everything in that house reminded her of him. And she couldn't bear the feeling of loneliness, which never left her since that day.
It had been full ten minutes before she was able to open the door and there, the loud blonde was standing.
"Your child misses you already. Aren't you going to see her?" Naruto asked in that tone of his, which was sometimes too annoying.
"I don't think…I can see her now…Not now…" Sakura said in that gentle voice of hers.
"Why not?" Naruto inquired and Sakura just lowered her head in response.
Naruto grabbed her arm and dragged her out of the house. He closed the door behind them and they exited the Hyuuga household. The blonde man opened the door of his car and threw her roughly in his car. He didn't give her a chance to jump off because in no time he was already speeding his car up.
"Where are you taking me?" Sakura asked her trembling voice, again, tears daring to fall.
But the Uzumaki didn't answer and continued driving. Sakura faced front and allowed the man to concentrate on his driving.
The pink-haired woman stared at the road with those blank green eyes of hers. Never did she blink, her mind blank as well. She panicked upon seeing the gates to the place she dreaded to visit. The place where her husband was resting peacefully…
"Why did you take me here?" Sakura said in her accusing tone, her voice shaking from the intensity of her feelings.
"Why should I not? I should have done this a long time ago," Naruto said as he got off the car and went to the side of the passenger's seat.
He dragged her out of the car and never did he loosen his grip on her arm as he continued to walk to the grassy grounds of the cemetery.
Different names. Different dates. Different messages. Sakura saw many tombstones as she allowed her best friend take her some place she never wanted to go to. She watched those dried leaves falling from the nearby trees and realized how she was very alike to that tree. Her life…was slowly shedding off from her.
They reached a certain spot in the very silent cemetery and Naruto pushed her forward. Sakura fell on the ground and she closed her eyes to avoid seeing the name, which caused her many tears to shed.
"Open your eyes, Sakura. Talk to him."
"No…" she said quietly.
"Talk." The loudmouth said firmly, which was really out-of-character
"No…"
"We won't leave unless you talk to him!" Naruto yelled out loud, his face looked very fierce that moment.
He was surely dense when it comes to everything around him. But whenever it came to his only best friend, the only person he trusted. He hated seeing her sad, because it makes his heart ache. And when the news about her husband reached him, he was the first at her side. He was even childish to get angry with the deceased man but he eventually came to his senses. His friend needed him more…
"Unless you talk to him, you won't feel a little bit better, do you know that?" Naruto said but heard nothing from the pink-haired beauty kneeling in front her husband's grave.
Naruto watched as her shoulders started to tremble and he knew, just then, that she was starting to cry. It was enough for him to keep silent for a while.
"I don't know what to say…" Sakura started and Naruto was quiet.
"I hate you for leaving, Neji. Do you know that?
"But I hate you even more for promising me forever when you know you can't even keep it." She continued, tears overflowing, and hands gripping the grass tightly.
Naruto walked farther away to leave her alone for a while. He stood under a leafless tree and leaned his back against it. He focused his eyes at the clouds in the sky, as they moved gently just like time.
"How could I live without you, Neji? Tell me, please." Sakura said helplessly.
"I know that you don't like it if I continued being like this…but can you blame me if I feel bad now? Can you blame me for wanting you back? Neji…"
Neji walked in a slow pace along the grassy path until he caught sight of the pink-haired woman, who was once his wife. He quickly went towards her direction and stopped a few feet at her right. He watched her as tears streamed down her face. And he couldn't accept it that he couldn't be the one to wipe the tears off her face. And that he was the cause of the tears that the grieving woman was shedding.
"Neji, please watch over me…until I can live my life again. And I know that you want me to feel better for Haruka. Please don't hate me…for abandoning her…" Sakura whispered, thinking that she was the only one who heard her words.
Still, Neji was watching her…
"Don't worry, Neji. Even if I move on…I would never forget you…I won't love another again…"
Neji stared at her, wide-eyed, at the words she had said. A part of him was happy that he would own her heart forever. But another part of him wouldn't want to be selfish. She was alive and breathing and he knew that she would still meet a lot of people in her journey, her life. And it was a lie to say that she wouldn't fall in love ever again. She was fragile and she needed someone to take care of her.
'No, please don't say that…' he said in his voice, that he wish would reach her.
Sakura looked up from staring hardly on her lap. She searched for that voice she heard but couldn't find anyone close to her. She glanced at the tombstone where his name was engraved.
"Did you hear everything, Neji? Please don't worry about me anymore…" Sakura said as she wiped the remaining tears on her face.
She stood up from her kneeling position and looked for Naruto, who was still leaning against the tree.
Naruto saw her looking at him and his foxy smile appeared on his face again. He waved at her and quickly ran towards her. He stood beside her and paid respect to her husband.
"Are you done?" Naruto asked and Sakura nodded at him.
"I thought you wouldn't stop being foolish…" Naruto said in that tone that was so like him. Because of this, he received a playful punch on his arm.
"Look who's talking?!" Sakura said and she stomped away, towards the gate of the cemetery.
"I was just joking Sakura-chan! Wait for me!" the loudmouth said as he ran after her.
Neji stood there and watched as the two move towards the exit. He was sure that Naruto would take care of his wife and he knew that the blonde would protect his wife from people who could possibly take advantage of her.
He watched their playful bickering and felt a slight relief when he saw a lighter expression on his wife's face. It had been long since he saw that smile, though still small, on her face. It was better rather than the gloomy face he had watched all those time.
He was happy that she would take their child from that loudmouth before she picked up his habits and that ramen-addiction of his. But he knew that his daughter was in good hands with Naruto and his younger cousin. He trusted them to take care of the family he left.
"I won't leave your side unless you find…the person who would take care of you, Sakura. And I would protect you from the people who might hurt you…I'll be here…until I find the light. But until that time, I'll be here beside you."
"I promise…." He said and he knew that it would reach the pink-haired woman's heart.
Sakura looked back where Neji's grave was located, thinking that she just heard his voice. And seeing no one, the two continued walking.
And the cherry blossoms would be in full bloom again…
End of the Second Chapter.
Baby Panikku: Thank you for reading this story. Again, this is not the last chapter. Thought it may look like a completed fic. If it is not good enough, I'll try harder next time. Promise!