Hey I just wanted to give a shout-out to my awesomely amazing Wonder Twin of a beta, LotheringRose. She's fantastic. She also betas like everything I write for any reason and just so happens to be a damned good writer herself. I also occasionally make NuitNuit beta as well, but I don't abuse that too often because I think it makes what I write too good so I try to use it in small doses. XD And hey, keeping to my once-a-month update plan! That's good, right?
Amaranthine
9:32
10 months after the end of the Fifth Blight
"Oh, how lovely it is to be somewhere civilized, a place with walls and a fire and a bath," Ghislaine gushed as the Dryden boys carted buckets of water to the lavatory. "And, as I am sure you know Loghain, I have certain tricks I can employ to keep the water hot, should you require them." Her eyes twinkled as she teased the glowering older man.
"I'll be in my rooms," he said sharply, dropping his bag for the porter and walking off.
Ghislaine shrugged. "C'est la vie. Renaud, perhaps you require my help?" she batted her eyelashes and giggled.
Renaud looked at her, surprised. "Ah, oui mademoiselle, as tempting as that offer is I'm afraid I have some pressing... business... Commander," he nodded at Maebh and quickly left, heading towards the stables.
Ghislaine sighed and crossed her arms. "I don't suppose you would be interested in a hot bath, Commander?"
Maebh laughed as she rolled her left shoulder. She had been plagued by a deep ache ever since the archdemon battle, and it always seemed to get worse when she was tired. "I think I can manage on my own, thank you." They began to walk up the stairs together.
Ghislaine pouted. "How long is it until the ball again, Commander?"
She grinned, feeling wicked as she began to tease the other mage. "We leave in two weeks. Actually, I was going to send most of our forces to Vigil's Keep, to complete their relocation and prepare for the arrival of Ferelden recruits. I mean, other than Loghain and myself, I don't see any reason why-"
"Oh," Ghislaine gasped, eyes wide with hurt, "surely you would not be so... so cruel, Commander! Not when Ser Perth told me himself that he would be attending! Oh, please, Commander I have my gown already chosen and I've never even been to a ball before and-"
Maebh laughed even harder. "Oh, alright! Alright! Calm yourself, Ghislaine. You can come along, if you don't mind being my attendant. Would that serve your aims of conquering the hearts of Ferelden well enough?"
Ghislaine pursed her lips thoughtfully and gazed upward, tapping her chin. "Yes, yes that would do nicely," she answered brightly. "So yourself, your honored father, and myself. Shall any others be joining us?" Her tone was far too casual when paired with her arch expression.
Maebh paused on the landing, supporting her weight on the banister. "I was considering asking Krystoff. My father seems to … dislike him the least."
Ghislaine stepped closer, and whispered, "Yes, but Commander, he's married."
"What are you getting at?" Maebh began to feel irritable.
"Why not bring Renaud?" She grinned wickedly, glancing about to make sure that none could overhear. "Unless, of course, you think that would make His Majesty too jealous..."
Maebh sighed. Ghislaine had a point. She had found herself growing accustomed to Renaud's calm presence, and it would be helpful to have him nearby during what was promising to be a stressful undertaking. "I will consider what you have said," she promised.
"Bon! So it is settled!"
Ghislaine skipped up the rest of the stairs.
A strange, hollow sound, not unlike horse hooves on paving stones. But closer. It invaded Maebh's thoughts. She frowned and turned her head, but the sound persisted. No, not hooves. A hand. No, not a hand. A fist. On the door. Somebody was knocking on the door.
"Maebh?" her father's voice questioned from the other side of the door. "Is everything alright? We are all waiting for you downstairs."
She shook herself. "Yes, yes, of course." It took all her self-control to keep her voice steady. "Just a few moments, if you please, I'll be right there."
She looked down at the piece of paper in her hand, feeling lightheaded. Perhaps it was a forgery? But if so, why would Cailan keep a forged letter that was so incriminating?
It couldn't possibly be real.
Or could it?
Had he really planned to put Anora aside? Had Eamon truly been advocating this course of action?
Maebh sat on the foot of her bed, pain throbbing in her chest. She pressed her palm to her heart. Oh Maker. She picked up the robe she had been packing, which contained the pocket where she found the first letter. There were two more letters, but when she glanced over them she quickly surmised that neither Eamon nor Anora had written them.
She started as the knocking resumed on the door. "Maybe, hurry up." Loghain truly sounded irritated now. "If you dally much longer we'll be caught in the snows."
"Just a minute," she called back, forcing herself to numbness. She shoved all three letters in her pocket.
This would have to wait until she got to Denerim.
The trip to the capital seemed much shorter than Maebh remembered. Of course, when they had left she and Loghain had been walking through knee-high snows, just barely recovered from the battle. Had a year truly passed already? It also amazed her how different the view was from the back of a horse. She gripped the reins tighter, and Cocotte tossed her head at the change in pressure.
"What's on your mind?" Loghain asked gruffly as the city walls rose into view.
Maebh looked down, surreptitiously glancing around. The other Wardens were either too far away to hear or immersed in their own conversations. She sidled Cocotte a little closer to Demonté and lowered her voice. "Before Ostagar, were Cailan and Anora... Were they having problems?"
Loghain snorted a laugh. "You know, years ago Maric claimed you were funny. I never believed him, but perhaps the two of you just had a more subtle sense of humor than I."
She looked up at him and scowled. "I'm serious! And I mean, more problems than … well than me."
Loghain scowled back at her. "This is hardly the time or the place for this sort of conversation, Maybe," he said sternly. "We'll talk at the Keep."
"But!"
"I said we will talk at the Keep!" He nudged Demonté forward, out of easy conversation range. Maebh fumed, trying to keep from gripping the reins too tight.
"Commander?" Renaud asked behind her. "Is something troubling you?"
She turned to see an unreadable expression on his face. "No," she said turning back and squaring her shoulders. "Everything's fine."
It was strange, standing in Duncan's office. It was still his, the evidence of his toil lingering everywhere. It appeared that not even the servants had set foot in the room since he had left. Maebh kept finding bits of correspondence, the odd pair of gloves, old teacups, even a hairbrush with a few long, dark brown hairs in the bristles.
She had never felt more like an intruder in her life.
Nervously she flipped through the letters, skimming their contents. Bryce Cousland, some woman Fiona, Irving, Cailan, the First Warden, Monstimmard... Some of the names she recognized, some she knew to be dead, some she had written to herself. Bryce had been replaced with his son, Fergus. Cailan with Alistair. The woman Fiona had not written to her. Did Duncan have a life outside of the Wardens? Maebh wondered if she had perhaps been Duncan's lover.
It all seemed so unbearably sad. She quickly shoved the correspondence in a drawer and tried to clear off a spot for herself. She would not be lingering long here, anyway.
"Do you need anything, my lady?" a soft voice asked.
She looked up to see a young elf girl in a servant's uniform. "Oh! Thank you, yes. I should like something to eat and wood for a fire. Also, could you deliver a message to my father? I wish to speak with him."
All three of her demands were met within minutes. The elf placed a tray of food on her desk, another deposited the wood in the fireplace, and Loghain walked in the room. The girl bowed and left while the boy looked for some tinder to light the fire. "Thank you," Maebh told the boy as she took an apple from the tray, "but that won't be necessary."
"Commander?" he asked, perplexed.
Maebh nonchalantly flicked a fingerful of sparks onto the wood, and it burst into flame. The boy jumped back and fled, wide-eyed. Loghain shut the door behind him, laughing a bit. "I'm seeing it more, now," he said, shaking his head. "You enjoyed that, didn't you?"
Maebh shrugged and wiped a drop of juice from her lip. "I want to talk about Cailan and Anora." She said bluntly.
Loghain's smile, such as it was, fell. He walked to the window, folded his arms, and hunched his shoulders. "Why?" he asked, just as blunt.
Maebh pulled the letters from Ostagar out of her pack and toyed with them idly. "Some... information has come to my attention that changes things. I want to know what was going on."
He sighed bitterly and rubbed his forehead. "Theirs was not as good of a match on a personal level as it was on a public level. But you know that first-hand, don't you?" He did not even attempt to hide his scorn. "But, from what was said to me and through my own observations, they appeared to be trying to improve their personal dealings with each other."
"Hmm," Maebh mused.
"What is this about?" Loghain turned, frowning. "Why bring this up now? Are you just trying to assuage your guilt or is there something else?"
Maebh jutted out her jaw. "Something else." She pushed herself up and took the letters over to him. "I found these in Cailan's chest at Ostagar. I was wondering if this was something we had to be concerned about it. After all, Anora did inform me that the Empress would be among the guests."
He snatched the letters and began to read. Maebh held her hands behind her back and lifted her chin, bracing for impact.
He crumpled them, seething. "Of all the moronic, pompous, absurd, empty-headed..." he muttered.
"If Anora has still not yet conceived-" She closed her eyes and swallowed, pushing the mental images that had just arisen in her mind's-eye back to the dark place where they belonged, "We need to tell her about this. Eamon may try this with Alistair as well."
"That is not all that needs to be done, Maebh," Loghain turned back to the window. "You know what you need to do."
Maebh walked back to her desk, momentarily speechless. He had scowled and grumbled about her relationship with Alistair in the past, but he had never directly confronted her about it. "You overstep your place, Warden," she said in her best "Commander" voice.
"As your subordinate, surely. But we are not talking about rank here, Maebh. We are talking about your sister and your brother-in-law and you are up to your neck in it. It is my responsibility as your father to put an end to it."
"You forget your place, Warden," she repeated, sitting very straight and placing her hands flat on the desk. "You are dismissed."
"No." He came over to the desk and leaned over to put his hands flat on its surface as well. "You must listen to reason. I have indulged you in this nonsense long enough. If Alistair is going to shame your sister it will not be with your assistance, not any longer. I'm putting and end to it right now, do you hear me?"
Maebh stood up again, shaking with rage. "You don't have the right-"
"I am your father and you will obey me!"
"I am your superior officer and you will leave this office right now! "
He snorted and leaned away. "Superior officer?" he sneered as he crossed his arms. "Is that the line you use on that Orlesian?"
Maebh reared back, caught off guard. "What are you talking about?"
"I am talking about your entirely inappropriate relationship with Renaud. Or do you think I wouldn't notice how the two of you have been mooning about?"
Inappropriate? Because he treated her kindly? Because she listened to his advice? It was all too much. "I don't want to talk about any of this. Alistair, Renaud, any of it! I want you out of my-"
"Commander, ser," the elf girl interrupted, "the King to see you."
Maebh slumped, pressing a hand to her forehead. "Loghain if you do not leave this instant I will have you thrown in the stocks, so help me Andraste."
He took a deep breath and drew himself to his full height. "I believe I've said all I have to say." He turned and left, with only the curtest of nods in Alistair's direction.
Alistair, for his part, smiled warmly and nodded cordially back at Loghain before continuing into the office.
"Allow me to personally extend the greetings of the crown," he said, grinning the same boyish grin he always did as his retinue of guards filed in behind him.
Maebh sat back down, feeling anxious. She tried to not look at the stone-faced guards that lined the walls, bristling with weapons. "Why do you do this? Are you bringing bad news? Think I might unleash a firebolt in here or something?" she asked peevishly, shuffling papers as she pretended to look preoccupied.
He laughed and lounged in the chair on the other side of the desk. "It wouldn't be the first time you used your outside spells on the inside, darling."
Maebh felt the eyes of each and every one of the guards on her. "Honestly, can you ask them to go? Even if I did try something you could counter me faster than any of them anyway."
"Always thinking." He waggled his finger at her and winked, turning to the guard standing at his right, "Very well. You may go, but stay close. I'll only be a minute." He stayed perfectly still, keeping eye contact with her until the last guard shut the door behind them. Only then did he gesture for her to come over to him.
She stayed where she was, reluctant to leave the safety of Duncan's desk.
He frowned. "Is something wrong?"
"What are you doing here, Alistair?" she asked, exasperated. "We were going to present ourselves formally later this afternoon." Her weariness seeped into her bones. Oh Maker, please don't let him pick a fight with her, too. She couldn't bear it.
His eyes tightened, even though his smile remained as jovial as it had been when he came in. When did he learn to do that, she wondered. Maybe he always knew. "I haven't seen you in, what, four months? Five?" He rubbed his eyes with his hand. "I don't want to fight."
Thank the Maker. "Neither do I," she said quietly.
He lowered his hand, looking as tired as she felt. "So," he cleared his throat and sat up straight. "How was Ostagar?"
Tears blurred Maebh's vision and she bowed her head. "It was... horrible," she took a deep breath. Don't cry.
"The reports were accurate? Sweet Andraste..." he got up and walked to the windows.
"They were accurate, and…" She took a deep breath. No more tears for Cailan. "And incomplete. I'd really rather not talk about it. But they had a necromancer, which is troubling."
"The darkspawn you mean?" He turned back, disbelieving.
She nodded. "We need somebody to populate the area down there. The darkspawn are making a push for it and if they take Ostagar that would be a powerful fortress for an invasion."
Alistair looked back to the window "How are they going to invade without an archdemon?" He scoffed. "Talk sense, Maebh."
She was quiet as she considered her next words. How could she make him understand? "They felt different, Alistair. They're changed, somehow. I'm can't really explain it."
He clenched his fists. "I should be with you." He sounded bitter, even regretful. "Out in the field.".
"You made your choice in that regard a long time ago," she pointed out, voice as soft as her words were hard.
He took a deep breath. "I thought we agreed to no fighting," he chided her, smile back in his voice. She wondered if it was real.
"Fair enough. At any rate," she pushed herself up and joined him at the window. "We need somebody down there whom we can trust to stick around. The Chasind are useless. Most of them never returned. The ones that are there are jumpy as deer and ready to bolt. We need people down there that we can trust to stay put as well as send word if something changes." She folded her arms and gazed down in the practice yard. Yves was leading the Orlesian Wardens in their daily drills. She tilted her head, trying to make out who was who, but the swirling flurries of snow obscured her view.
"Why not some of them," he gestured. "You'll be getting your Fereldan recruits soon enough."
She shivered in the chill and tried not to lean into him when he put his arm around her shoulders. "No. I'm sending all but two to Amaranthine tomorrow. There are odd reports coming out of there as well, and I don't want to throw any recruits into something they can't handle."
"Aw, they're going to miss the party! And we're all going to have such a splendid time!"
"You know I don't like it when you're sarcastic with me." She sighed and leaned her head on his shoulder. "Is it going to be that bad?"
"It's best not to think about it," he advised. "So, have any recommendations for this Blighted land settlement program you've concocted? The Maker knows I don't have any men to spare," he joked without humor.
"Well, what about the Dalish? They want land, they certainly proved their worth as warriors at the Battle of Denerim, they're not likely to give it up without a fight," she tried to remember all the points in their favor. "I suppose the only real problem is convincing them to come to us if there is a problem. They will be leery to believe that we won't just take the land back on a whim."
He nodded, pursing his lips thoughtfully. "Not a bad plan. I'll talk to Anora about it."
Maebh felt sick at the sound of her name. Her thoughts went back to the letters. She pulled away from him. "Yes, well," she said lamely.
"Speaking of Anora." He turned and clasped her forearm, pulling her to face him. "She wants you and Loghain to come and dine with us this evening." He grinned, a real smile this time, if a bit chagrined. "A nice family dinner before all the formal stuff gets underway."
The weary feeling returned. "Of course. We'll be there."
He pulled her closer, and she suddenly felt trapped. An odd panic, the kind she thought she would only ever feel at the tower, began to flutter in her chest. "No," she blurted, placing a hand against his chest.
He frowned, hurt. "Why? What's wrong? I don't have something dribbling out my nose, do I?"
"No, it's just that..."
He reached up and placed his hand at the back of her head. "I haven't seen you in so long, don't tell me you didn't miss me."
Her heart was cracking. She wanted everything he did but her mind kept returning to the letters on her desk, she couldn't betray Anora like Eamon and Cailan were prepared to do. She realized she was gathering her will and released it. "It's not that, it's just that I- please, Alistair, stop!" she yelped, louder than she intended.
He released her, stunned, as the door quickly opened.
"Excuse me if I'm interrupting," Renaud announced loudly before he entered the room, "But Yves sent me to ask you— oh, I beg your pardon," he raised himself to his full height and looked down at Alistair.
Alistair waved his hand dismissively. "No, please continue. You were interrupting nothing."
Renaud turned to Maebh. "Commander, Yves sent me to ask how long we were to stay here before proceeding to Amaranthine."
"I should like for them to stay an evening here and then continue on. It would do everybody some good to get a good night's rest," she replied, trying to mimic Anora's perfect posture.
"Mas oui," Renaud replied, bowing and turning to leave.
"Renaud." She stopped him and went to the door. "If you would be so kind as to inform Krystoff that it will not be necessary for him to stay here with Loghain, Ghislaine and myself. And that," her voice dropped and Renaud leaned a bit closer, "I should like you to stay in his stead."
Renaud looked at her sidelong a moment before nodding. "But of course," he bowed again and left.
She turned back to Alistair, leaving the door open. "Was there anything else you require, Your Majesty?" she asked calmly.
She felt a pang as she saw the little muscles in his jaw working. "No, not at all my dear Warden. We will see you this evening at supper."