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In The Windmills of Her Mind

Chapter Six

Keys that jingle in your pocket, words that jangle in your head, why did summer go so quickly? Was it something that you said?

Words. They ran through her head, thousands of them one after another. Meaningless syllables strung together to form a lump in her mind. Words her lips couldn't pronounce, they flowed through her – every word she'd ever spoken or whispered, screamed or cried, every word that she'd ever thought shot through her. Each tried to fight to the top, forcing themselves up to form a wedge in her throat.

She couldn't breathe; millions of words were clogging her and tainting her. She couldn't move nor think, she could just watch as the words fell through her and broke her – each as meaningless as the word before. There was one word that stuck though, as all the others flowed through and out of her as easily as blood, there was one that was stuck. It was caught on her mind like a hare on a wire fence, its foot trapped between the wire – the word was trapped between thoughts. She didn't know what it was or what it meant, if it was a name, object or person, it was all that remained in the sheer blankness of her mind. The word was all she had to cling to, the only hope to lean on. She couldn't feel, she couldn't think and nor could she know, and so she kept this word, she traced it upon the bruises that darkened her pale skin.

Her eyes were closed and her head remained on the pillow, but one trembling unbroken finger traced the word upon the tender skin of her forearm. She had no nail – they were all gone, so skin ran over scared and scratched skin, she gently traced it over and over again searching for the meaning, for answers – instead she found pain.

She was curled into a ball, an ice cold floor pressed against her back like a thousand tiny icicles. Beside her a man sat with his head resting on his knees, from her spot on the floor she watched him. She slowly raised her hand and traced her finger gently against his hollow cheek; the bone stuck out against her hand as she felt the coolness of his skin. Her fingers moved to the deep cut that laced his forehead, her finger tenderly danced across his skin feeling how the tiny cells put him back together and slowly fixed him. He raised his eyelids, his sorrowful brown eyes watched her as she smiled softly – he shook his head. He ran his fingers across her cheek gently wiping away the thick blood that clung to her skin. It was warm and sticky and coated his fingers. He raised it to his face and stared at it, his finger bent slowly at the joints like a giraffe finding its feet for the first time.

'I'm sorry' he finally whispered. From the floor she shook her head – she didn't have the energy to sit up

'I'll survive' she whispered – her voice hoarse from screams. He closed his eyes and bit his lip

'But soon you won't be, soon when they strike you down you won't get back up'. She smiled softy at him and shook her head. She slowly slid her cold hand into his blood coated one, their fingers interlocked – forever the perfect union, they were as one again – how they belonged. She shook her head at him again as a blood drop slowly ran down her face navigating its way to the earth

'Nope' she whispered 'Cos I'll always have you to pick me back up again' she told him. He grinned at her – forgotten muscles being flexed as his face pulled into a gesture she thought she'd never see again. The moment she saw his smile she knew everything would be okay, that he would get her out of here, that they would see daylight again…then the door opened.

As they walked in she froze on the floor, her hand interlocked with his – both of them gripping for their lives. Their eyes locked together as footsteps rung on the stone floor, each of them holding a promise as they waited for what was to come. They reached her first, their faces unyielding and their feet unforgiving as they stepped upon her. Her eyes widened in pain and her hand tighten around his as their feet pressed into her back, finally she let out a scream – it seeped from her soul and it tortured him, he jumped up, still holding her hand

'No!' he shouted 'get off her!'. They grabbed his arm and twisted it behind his back, a searing pain shot through him as they began to drag him away – he felt his hand fall from hers and little did he know it was the last time he would feel it, it would be the last time he saw the sparkle in her eyes – it would be the last time he saw her.

'No!' he screamed as they dragged him on his knees from the room

'Don't touch her!' he yelled, kicking out violently. And then he was gone, silence fell over the room but his cries still rang through her head

'Doctor!' she screamed. And then there was darkness as the foot slammed onto her head.

Her breathing was shallower now as her fingers ran over her skin faster and faster, she didn't move other than that – as still as unconscious expect for her hand. Her hand alone was fighting it as words swarmed through her, swamping her, they touched every nerve and cell, the burst through every inch of her taunting her with knowledge she couldn't find, bit only one word would reach out, only one word could almost grasp the reality that taunted her so closely, only one word was near and it was reaching out.

Mary walked into the room; she saw the movement first – the stillness of her body and the urgency of the hand. She slowly walked over to the bed where faint shard of daylight broke through the window burning into the room. She blinked rapidly against the light and her hand gently shook. She watched the way the hand moved, the restlessness with which it attacked itself – it slowly moved and she watched – it was coming. The truth would be here soon and then they'd all know – they'd all know what the broken blonde girl fought so hard to hide – the reason she longed to hide in the darkness for all eternity.

Mary stepped closer, afraid of being too close in case it stopped. She looked down at the arm, red marks were forming as friction burns from the force of her hand. The white skin which was darkened with purple bruises was now stained red – and it read one word. The one word the girl knew but couldn't speak. Mary breathed in sharply before expelling the word

'Doctor'

'Rose'