Equivalent Exchange
Chapter Two: Stowaway
Now that she had a plan, Mai set to work on it with vigor. Zuko might be banished, he might be leaving the Fire Nation, but he wouldn't be going without her. She would make sure of it.
Opening the shutters so that she could see again, Mai checked her door. She didn't want her mother or father walking in on her packing. With a finger on her pointed chin, she surveyed her room and then began to rummage through her large wardrobe. It wasn't an overnight trip to Ember Island she was taking. This journey could be the beginning of the rest of her life. She needed to be prepared. She needed money.
Her uncle, who also happened to be her favorite relative, sometimes gave her money for her birthday or to spend at the Fire Festival, both rare times that he visited, leaving his job as warden of the Boiling Rock Prison for a few days. She hardly ever spent the money and had accumulated a tidy sum over the last few years.
Pushing aside hanging robes all in traditional Fire Nation colours of red and black and gold (she refused to wear the pink that some girls preferred and her mother often brought home) she reached into the back and grabbed hold of a small wooden box. Inside was a red velvet pouch full of Fire Nation coins. She threw the pouch onto her bed and began to select some clothing; her cloak, a nightgown, undergarments, leggings, two pairs of pants and two tunics. On a whim, she chose a dress in a dramatic plum colour and folded it neatly before placing it on her bed beside the rest of the items.
She paused for a moment to think and then remembered towels. In her private bathroom she found two clean ones along with her much beloved robe. She left the bathroom and found her large satchel, opened it up and pushed everything inside. It was a tight fit and Mai could barely do up the buckles.
In a smaller bag she placed her hairbrush, a nail file, special soap for her hair, a small bottle of bath oil, a bottle of skin cream and her favorite earrings, the only jewelry she ever wore. Her many knives and other bladed weapons fit neatly underneath her clothing. When she left tomorrow, all of them would be close to her skin, where they belonged.
Satisfied with her packing, Mai shoved the bags underneath her bed and then examined herself in the vanity mirror. It wouldn't do to have tearstained cheeks or red eyes. Her father would ask uncomfortable questions and her mother would lecture her on the positives of moving on quickly after a short grieving period. The skin around her eyes was slightly puffy and the whites of her eyes were stained an unflattering pink. She entered the bathroom and took a facecloth, dipping it into the water basin, and patted her eyes with the cool liquid until the puffiness went down and the redness faded.
Then she unlocked her door and went downstairs. She had stories to fabricate and lies to tell.
The doctor, a crusty old man who had served the royal family for over forty years, finished changing the prince's bandages. A salve to prevent infection was also applied to the burn and another dose of painkiller forced down the struggling young man's mouth. More tears rolled down the pale unmarked skin of his right cheek. He hated crying in front of the miserable old man, but the pain was so unbearably intense that he had no control.
Iroh patted Zuko's hand. As soon as the doctor left the room with his bag of medicines and strange looking instruments, Iroh spoke. "Rest now, nephew. I have much work to do."
"What do you mean?" the prince asked.
His good eye began to droop closed as the painkiller, mixed with herbs that promoted sleep, started to take effect.
"I'm going with you and I need to make preparations," the former general replied.
"You are?" Zuko asked, surprised that anyone would make that sacrifice for him.
"Of course; I would never let you go all on your own. You're still a boy, Zuko, no matter how hard you try to be a man."
"Thank you," the prince whispered and drifted off to sleep.
Iroh hated leaving Zuko alone and vulnerable in his room but he had no choice. All he could do was work quickly and get back to his injured nephew as soon as possible. He planned as he walked along the palace corridors, stroking his graying beard with one hand and rubbing his considerable belly with the other.
Ozai had granted Zuko a ship but the boy needed a crew. There were favors and loyalties Iroh could call upon and he would, for his nephew's sake. His first stop would be Lieutenant Jee's home. After that he would visit one of his favorite people-the amazing cook from his days as a general in the Fire Nation army. That man could turn dirt into something delicious. And after that he would propose 'exciting world travel' to a few more retired soldiers whom he knew. An engineer was needed as well.
By the time the day ended, Iroh had amassed a fairly complete crew. His old friends came through for him as he hoped they would. Back at the palace, Iroh grabbed some food from the kitchen and walked back to Zuko's room. Voices drifted down the hallway to him and he moved faster.
"I'll be the heir now, you know," he heard his niece say confidently. "You're never coming back."
"Shut up, Azula," Zuko hissed. "Just. Shut. Up."
He dragged a hand down his face, accidentally disturbing the bandages.
"Calm down, stupid," the princess sneered. "You might make yourself even uglier. You've already lost Mai but maybe some poor Earth Kingdom girl will still have you."
Iroh pushed open the door hard enough to make it slam against the wall and come swinging back toward him. His face, normally smiling and happy, was dark and terrifying. He dropped the tray onto Zuko's desk and moved over to the bed. Grabbing Azula by the arm he pulled her off the chair that sat next to the bed and then dragged her across the floor. She resisted and dug her feet into the plush of the red runner emblazoned with an even darker red dragon.
"Let go of me, Uncle," she said through clenched teeth.
Iroh was brutal; his strong fingers squeezed her thin arm tightly.
"Out!" Iroh exclaimed and gave her a shove into the hallway.
"How dare you?" the princess cried, her amber eyes blazing with fury and her ponytail swinging.
Iroh just shut and locked the door. He turned to look at Zuko, trying to gauge the effect Azula's visit had on the boy. The prince was paler than usual and fistfuls of the red sheets were twisted around his hands. His breathing was loud and raspy sounding.
"It's alright, Zuko. She's gone."
Iroh retrieved the tray and sat down beside his nephew.
"Uncle, once I leave, I'm never coming back, am I?" the young prince asked in a heartbreakingly sad voice. "It's over for me. And Mai….she can't see me like this. She deserves better."
"Nothing is over," Iroh replied sternly. "You're stronger than you think you are, nephew. You can't give up, especially not before you've even begun. Yes, things are bleak right now but I firmly believe that one day I will see you on the throne. As for Mai, I know that she cares deeply for you, Zuko; no matter what."
"It doesn't matter if she cares. My father is dissolving our betrothal. I'll never see her again. Why, why does everything have to be so hard? Why is everything so easy for Azula? Everything she does is right. It's like she's perfect."
Iroh's eyes narrowed.
"Perfect she is not," he stated succinctly. "I brought some food. You need to eat and I need to speak with the physician. It will be me changing your bandages and taking care of that burn once we're gone. Oh, and your hair, Zuko; it needs to be cleaned up."
"Hmmm?"
"I'll need to shave your head. But I can leave a topknot."
"Fine," Zuko agreed. "I don't really care."
He reached for a soft piece of fruit and pushed it into his mouth. Despite its sweetness it tasted like defeat.
"Come in here for a moment, Mai," the girl's mother called as soon as she heard her door open. "I want to talk to you."
"Damn," Mai swore under her breath but walked obediently into her mother's room.
"Sit down," the woman said.
Mai sat and looked down at her hands.
"I'm sure that you're worried and upset now. But don't be. There's no need. You're a beautiful girl and other families will jump at the chance to have you as a match for one of their sons. Your future is secure. I promise you that."
"Gee, I feel all better now. May I leave?"
"I'm just trying to help, Mai," she replied irritably. "Yes, you may go. It's time for dinner anyway. Make sure that your hands are clean."
"I'm not five, mother," Mai reminded the woman as she got up from the chair.
She stomped her way down the stairs and sat down in the dining room to wait. The meal was a somber affair with little conversation. Mai spent the meal staring at her bowls and only making one syllable replies to the questions that were put to her. Finally, when tea and cookies were served, Mai began to weave her tale.
"I'll be spending tomorrow night with Azula," she lied. Neither her face nor her voice gave any indications that she wasn't being truthful. "She's upset about what happened. And I want to say goodbye to Zuko before he leaves tomorrow. So, I'll be at the palace all day."
"I don't think that's a good idea, Mai. And I've never seen the princess get upset about anything," her father remarked.
"Azula asked," Mai said icily.
"Well, if she asked then you must go," her mother said in a simpering voice.
"Yes, I must," Mai agreed and fought back a smirk.
Once dessert was over, Mai slipped back up to her room and took a long bath. She wasn't sure when her next opportunity would come. Life aboard a ship was a mystery to her. Part of her was excited and part of her was apprehensive. That didn't matter, though. She could grow accustomed to anything. The important thing was that she would still be a part of Zuko's life. There was certainly nothing in the capitol city to hold her. Her parents were parents in none of the ways that really counted. And there was nobody else she would miss.
She sat in the water for almost an hour, letting her eyes slide shut and her mind and body relax. Her long, thick hair, what her mother called Mai's crowning glory, floated in the water, looking like strands of shiny, ebony seaweed. Sighing, Mai finally climbed out of the tub a few minutes later and dried off. She slipped into a robe and sat at her dressing table. Her brush was already packed so she combed out her hair, working diligently at the little snarls until it hung smoothly down her back. She would need hairpins of some kind too. Or perhaps she would adopt a new hairstyle to go with her new life, something looser and freer. Yes, the idea began to grow on her. A lot of things were going to change, just about everything. Why not her hair too?
Ready for bed, she slid between the expensive red silk sheets and then pulled the top one up over her chest. Her mind worked feverishly and sleep was a long time coming.
Iroh and Zuko both woke early, almost as the sun rose. The young prince stumbled into the bathroom, carefully avoiding the mirror and washed up as best he could. He felt a little better with clean teeth and fresh clothing. Tentatively, he ran a hand across his smooth skull and reached for the topknot, the last of his hair. It was better than the ragged, burned bits that were left after Ozai's fire blast did its work, but it still felt strange. What did it really matter, though? Who would see his hair? Who would be looking at him anyway?
"I've started packing and breakfast is coming shortly," Iroh called. "Are you alright?"
Zuko opened the bathroom door and joined his uncle who stood near the prince's wardrobe.
"We should prepare for anything, so I'll pack your warmest clothing. We can buy more if we have to."
"I don't have much money, Uncle. It's enough to keep us going for a few months maybe but…."
The retired general raised his hand to stop his nephew's words.
"I have money. We'll be fine."
"But, you shouldn't….."
"No arguments. I have nothing else to spend it on anyway."
Zuko sighed and his shoulders slumped. He didn't want to be dependent on anyone but had no choice. It just added to the disgrace that he felt.
"I've already seen to some sparse furnishings on the ship and a supply of food and tea. If there are some personal items you want to bring, you'd better get them now."
"Have you seen the ship, Uncle?" Zuko asked as he reached for a new set of meditation candles.
He slipped something else, something small and hard into his pocket and smiled wistfully.
"No, Ozai just gave me a number," Iroh replied evasively. It's out of dry dock now and is ready to leave."
"Oh, well there's not much point in waiting around, is there? We'll leave as soon as we're ready," Zuko stated.
He remembered his knife, a gift from Iroh three years earlier and snatched it off the desk. Looking around his room, Zuko's eye was drawn to the portrait of his mother that he kept in a place of honour by his bed. Her eyes seemed to look back at him and Zuko imagined her disappointment. He walked over to the bedside table and picked up the picture, clutching it to his chest for just a moment. Then he wrapped it carefully in a silk shirt and placed it in the bottom drawer of his desk. She was better off there, far away from her son's disgrace.
"The physician is coming to take one last look at you, nephew."
"Fine," Zuko replied.
A servant brought in breakfast and Zuko ate mechanically. Iroh sipped at his tea and then critiqued its scent and taste.
"I'll be making my own tea from now on," he vowed and gave Zuko a wink. "You should learn how too. Tea making is a skill that never goes amiss."
"I don't care about tea," the young man snarled angrily.
"That really hurts," the old man replied as he dabbed comically at his dry eyes.
Zuko glared.
Mai rose early as well. She composed a letter to her mother and father and then got dressed while the ink dried. She did her hair in the usual style; anything different would alert her parents. Once the letter was ready, she rolled it up and slipped it inside the small bag under her bed. She would pay a messenger to deliver the letter late tomorrow. By that time, Zuko's ship, with Mai on it, would be long gone.
She ate breakfast with her parents, taking extra helpings of everything as if storing up for lean times.
"Goodness, Mai, you're eating an awful lot. You need to be careful of your figure, especially now."
"I'm hungry. When I'm hungry, I eat," Mai said flatly and then rolled her pretty gold eyes.
Mai's mother shook her head and pursed her lips.
"Hmmm," she replied disdainfully.
"She is still growing," Mai's father chimed in. "I don't think she needs to worry about getting fat."
"That may be so, but she needs to be more conscious of her figure and her looks in general."
"You worry too much, dear," her father remarked.
Mai had heard the same conversation in one form or another countless times and simply tuned them out. She knew her own body better than they did and knew how to take care of it. Her mother's comments were nothing but thinly veiled insults; something else Mai was accustomed to.
"I need to get to the palace now," she announced and moved her chair back from the table.
"Oh, that's right. We'll see you tomorrow then?" her father asked.
"Yeah, tomorrow," Mai answered.
She walked slowly upstairs and into her room. After grabbing the two bags from under her bed, she lingered and took a last look around. Regardless of how happy or unhappy she had been during the last few years, this room was still hers. It had been a sort of sanctuary for her, a place of peace and a place to get away from the nagging and the ridiculous expectations of perfection.
A favorite book of hers lay on the desk. She reached for it and ran her fingers lovingly over the worn leather cover.
"'Love among the Dragons'; How could I forget that?" she muttered to herself and stuffed it into the large satchel.
Sighing, she crossed the threshold and closed the door behind her. Both her mother and father were already engaged in their daily activities. Neither noticed when she left.
As soon as she was out on the street, Mai hurried. There was a messenger service nearby. She presented her letter, and paid a small fee to have it delivered the following day to her parents' house. That done, she made her way to the harbour. It was full of merchant ships, bringing produce in from the outer islands and massive war ships, intimidating in their size and their structure. Amongst the bigger ships, a tiny war ship, one of a group that hadn't been used for years, sat, looking inferior and out of place. Somehow Mai knew it was the ship Ozai had given Zuko. There was no way that despicable man would ever give his son the best. That privilege was always meant for Azula.
The docks were busy and no one paid her any mind. She heard murmurings about Zuko's banishment; it was big news in this small city. Mai knew, however, that the story would soon be replaced by more recent gossip. Attention was fleeting after all.
Mai watched as a worker carried some boxes up the gangplank and onto Zuko's ship. She edged closer. Pretending to be just another nosy citizen, Mai asked the man if the ship was indeed Prince Zuko's. She needed to be certain.
"Yes, miss, I'm just loading some smaller things right now. I heard they'll be leaving soon."
"They?" she asked.
"His uncle, General Iroh, is going with the poor kid. And his uncle also hired a crew."
"Good," she replied sympathetically. "At least he won't be alone."
"That's exactly what I told my friend, Jin. It would be terrible if he was all alone."
"Terrible," Mai agreed as she tried to figure out a way to get onboard without anyone seeing her.
She needed a make a distraction of some kind. There were wooden crates filled with melons and piled precariously on top of one another. Mai sidled closer and closer until she stood right next to them. With one nudge, the crates tumbled downward and melons rolled everywhere, splattering juice and seeds and pink flesh. Taking her opportunity, Mai ran up the ship's gangplank and went immediately below deck. Finding a place to hide was next on her agenda.
"Are you sure that you wouldn't prefer to leave closer to dark, Zuko?" Iroh asked gently.
He knew of people's cruelty and their curiosity. There would be stares and jeers and perhaps worse things.
"I'm fine, Uncle," the young prince replied brusquely. "I just want to get it over with."
His youthful face, what could be seen of it, was set grimly and his good eye was narrowed. He carried a solitary bag slung over his shoulder.
"As you wish," Iroh said softly.
They left Zuko's room and made their way through the palace. Servants stopped what they were doing and watched until the boy faded from view or turned a corner. Zuko had always been kind and polite to the staff and they would miss him even if no one else at the palace would.
He walked as steadily as he could. He was still weak and the medicine had a sort of numbing effect on his entire body. Iroh supported Zuko with a strong hand placed on his arm and the prince was grateful. Standing at the main palace doors, waiting for Zuko's appearance, was Azula. She wore a delighted expression and rubbed her hands together gleefully.
"Have a nice life, brother," she cackled insincerely. "I know that I will."
"Ignore her," Iroh whispered. "She's not worth the effort of a reply."
Zuko held his head high and walked by his sister without giving her a glance. She was disappointed and began to taunt him. Gritting his teeth now, Zuko continued his movement forward and battled the strong desire to retort. Outside the doors he breathed easier.
His relief was short lived however. Once they were through the gates and out on the street a crowd gathered, parting as he walked along. Most people whispered amongst themselves but a few shouted, calling him a disgrace, a failure and a pathetic weakling. Zuko's bottom lip began to quiver and he bit down on it forcefully until blood welled up. He licked his lip clean and swallowed down the metallic tasting liquid.
The walk seemed to take forever but in reality it was only about twenty minutes. By the time he reached the harbour, the crowd had dissipated, already bored with the tragedy of the banished prince. The crew was waiting and they all greeted Iroh like an old friend.
"Zuko, you should meet the crew," Iroh stated.
"Not now," the prince growled.
He walked aboard ship and followed the deck around until he faced the calm water of the inlet and the rougher water of the sea further out. He wouldn't look back.
Mai was curled up uncomfortably in a small, stuffy storage room. Some empty chests provided cover for her should someone happen by. Her bags were close and she kept a hand protectively on both of them. After more than an hour of waiting, she heard the patter of footsteps on the metal of the deck. Some of the crew walked below. Mai could hear them moving down the stairs that led to the engine room. The ship then sputtered to life and began to move. It was soothing at first, but as soon as they moved out into open water, the motion grew rockier. Mai's stomach heaved and she covered her mouth firmly with her hand until the nausea passed.
"I'd better get used to it," she warned herself. "The seas are going to get a lot rougher than this."
Drowsiness claimed her next and she felt her eyes slide shut. Zuko's voice woke her sometime later.
"I'm going to my room, Uncle. Don't disturb me," he ordered angrily.
She stared out into the corridor, careful to remain hidden, and caught just a glimpse of the prince as he walked by. Her heart ached and she yearned to call out to him. But honestly, she wasn't quite sure how he would react to her stowing away on his ship and his mood obviously wasn't the best. Once they were well beyond the Gates of Azulon, Mai would make her presence known. Until then, she would sleep.
A/N: Now that all the set up is over, Mai and Zuko will finally have a chance to talk. Things will be difficult for them, though. I hope you enjoyed the chapter. Thanks to those who continue to support my stories and welcome to any new readers I may have acquired with this story.