Chapter 13, And Then There Was a Curtain Call!
Disclaimer: For three books. Nothing.
A/N: And we're here! The conclusion of the book, that isn't altogether that interesting, if you ask me. It's themed after a traditional curtain call in old theater, when the actors come out on stage in groups and share some parting words with the audience. Note that there will be information concerning Book 4 in the end note. Onwards!
I sat at my desk, looking at my laptop: this was it!
"Plot Murderer #1!" I called. He emerged from the room where he had been sleeping for the majority of the performance, "It's time to take your bow!"
"Yessir, Mr. #2!" he replied snapishly.
"I'm going to ignore your double meaning. Let's get on stage and take a bow!"
We arrived at the Queer Events Theater where you, readers, have been watching the show.
"Take your bow, boy!" I urged him.
"Alright, alright!" he sighed, throwing a bouquet of flowers into the audience in the most cheesy way possible. "You've been a great audience, guys!" I called to them and we stepped to the side, "Violet Baudelaire and Duncan Quagmire!" I announced, as a few bars of 'I Feel Pretty' played in the background.
Violet and Duncan dashed onto the stage, "It's been great, guys!" cheered Violet.
"There's more where this came from!" bellowed Duncan as they kissed and joined us.
Plot Murderer #1 proclaimed, "Chubs Baudlaire and Isadora Quagmire!" 'Con te Partiro' played in back as Chubs and Isadora arrived.
"You've been odiferous!" he said. Isadora looked at him: "In a good way, I mean!"
"See you in Book 4, guys!" waved Isadora, they kissed and came to our group.
"Put your hands together for Count Olaf and Sunny Baudelaire!"
Olaf came on the scene, Sunny in arms as the 'Phantom of the Opera' played.
"We send our gratitude!" cheered Olaf, "I'm available for children's parties and bar mitzvahs!"
"Ham!" said Sunny, which meant, "You're such a ham, darling!"
Plot Murderer #1 continued, "Esme Squalor and Carmelita Spats!"
'Popular' started up as the two ladies came up, "You're absolutly marvelous!" beamed Esme.
"My first big role! Yay!" clapped Carmelita.
I continued, "Say a grand farewell for Arthur Poe and Martha Piedmont!"
'You Fell Out of the Sky' intoned and Mr. Poe tipped his hat, "So long, everyone!"
"It's been great!" waved Martha.
"The Plot Twist triplets!"
'Dinghy' began to play as Frank, Ernest and Dewey ran on.
"We're on to better things!" chorused Frank and Ernest.
"I'll be in the next book, everyone!" said Dewey.
"Sir and Charles Sternhart!"
We started 'Defying Gravity' as the midgit and the fruitcup arrived, "It's been great!" squeeled Charles.
"Defy Gravity, folks! Remember that!" roared Sir.
"One final goodbye for the Prufrock Squad!"
Some random music started because we never gave these guys an actual song.
"IT'S GREAT TO BE DEAD!" said Nero.
"Farewell!" chorused Remora and Bass.
"The Henchfolk!"
'Marvelous Weekend' started as the five loveable fellows arrived.
"WE'LL BE MORE IMPORTANT IN BOOK 4, GUYS!" they said as one.
"Goodbye, Kit Snicket and Commander Sausagepot!"
The two most minor characters in the story dashed onto the stage and waved.
"I'll be back for Book 4!" said Sausage Pot.
"And so will I!" waved Kit.
Standing ovation as:
THE CURTAIN FALLS
A/N: Third time's the charm, guys! Hope you enjoyed it all!
Are the kids gonna die? Probably not, but there is a fate worse then death to endure!
Some more questions that you guys might have:
WHERE WILL THE KIDS END UP NEXT?
WHERE IS THE HARPOON GUN?
WHERE IS DEWEY?
WHERE IS THE CHAMBER POT?
HAS OLAF GIVEN UP WITH HIS PLANS FOR THE BAUDE AND QUAG FORTUNES?
WHERE ARE THE QUAGMIRE PARENTS?
WILL MR. POE EVER SEE HIS SONS AGAIN?
WHAT FUNNY ESCAPADES WILL THE HENCHFOLK GET UP TO NEXT?
WILL I EVER STOP DOING THESE QUESTION LISTS?
Most of these questions and more will be answered in Book 4, which will parody Book 9. As such, it will be called 'The Wicked Carnival'.
Since this Book focused on musicals, mainly 'The Phantom of the Opera', so will the fourth. Our upcoming story will follow the same formula, though to a different extent. Book 4 will be based around 'Wicked the Musical'. It will focus on the Wicked B*tch of the West, otherwise known as Madame Lulu, otherwise known as Olivia.
See you guys there!
Book 4 Coming Next Friday!:)
The End