A/N the trouble with having several parallel books is that there are spoilers; this is a spoiler for Elissa the Woodcrafter which I haven't got around to posting yet because the books don't quite run in parallel. I guess the choices are to come back to this when you get over the first use of logication in Elissa or hope to have forgotten names during the meanwhile... I wrote Elissa first but this started before it did chronologically... sorry.

Chapter 8

It was sooner than T'rin expected that he found out Shoris' mission; for a few days later, Z'linda and Z'kan went off to the Woodcrafter Hall and returned with a sullen looking lad. Z'kan had a quiet word with L'gal and T'rin about giving the boy Rayenn a rudimentary education; and Z'kan outlined the lad's unfortunate background. Rayenn's new fosterparents felt that the Harpers should know about the way the lad had been treated by his Oldtimer father, and coerced into risking the whole future of the Woodcrafter Hall.

L'gal and T'rin undertook the education of the Weyr children as part of their duties as well as teaching their own apprentices; and as there were two talented Journeymen Harpers at High Reaches the Weyr rejoiced in a higher standard of education than many, even quite large, establishments could boast. The level of education was helped by virtually unlimited sheets of paper from H'llon and his ingenious water-driven pulping machine. Rayenn had received rudimentary education with his cotholder mother, but was woefully ignorant on many subjects, and would need extra help to catch up to the others of his own age.

Rayenn said little; but listened well. T'rin saw a mixed up lad whose efforts to please had so far brought him nothing but trouble; but who had been given a new hope by the kindness of Z'linda and Z'kan. T'rin and L'gal were gentle with the boy, and it was not long before he started opening up and asking as well as answering questions. Young Darellon, the clubfooted boy who had come with D're, took Rayenn under his wing; glad, he said, of another boy his own age properly fostered in the Weyr; because he was sick of being outnumbered by girls. Rayenn had even managed a laugh at that.

"There's plenty of candidates your age to choose from, you don't have to go around with me" he ventured, half expecting rejection.

"Sure" said Darellon" "And I guess we'll join them – when there's eggs, this time or next. But they'll mostly either go or Impress. Once we're put forward, it'll be different: but right now we're proper residents here, and they're not yet fixtures."

"I might not be a fixture – if Z'kan and Z'linda decide they don't really want me" Rayenn mumbled.

Darellon snorted.

"They'd not foster you if they didn't want you" he said. "They're straight people. Like my foster father."

Darellon knew more about Z'kan than many; his foster father was a Brown Rider who flew in the same flight that Z'kan was accustomed to join since the Oldtimer had more or less moved into High Reaches, with the tacit approval of T'bor. The lad was also associated with the logicators – and so was privy to information many youths were not! Darellon told Rayenn how he had been accepted by J'red, despite his club foot, at first as a kind of surrogate for J'red's own son who had died in a weyrling accident; and how now he had become J'red's son in his own right.

"You've a club foot?" Rayenn was surprised.

Darellon nodded, proudly.

"Yes, it hardly notices now, does it!" he said. "I exercise it all the time, and Calla's been oiling it and pulling it straight since I got here. And I wore a brace at first that H'llon, T'lana and L'gani designed for me."

Rayenn stared.

"They really do care here, then!" he said "Though you are a Brown Rider's son, so I guess they'd take more trouble…."

"Foster son" Darellon corrected. "My REAL father is a cot holder. I got made to feel guilty all my life for having a clubfoot. D're – Daire as was then – brought me here, with other kids nobody wanted for their various deformities. And they helped all of us, and we got fostered around the Weyr. So Serelis has a wooden foot for the one she lost, Telfer has a firelizard to be his eyes for him. Deela didn't make it" his face clouded "Even Master Oldive could do nothing, but at least she died feeling loved with Sh'rilla and T'kil fostering her. And they've just done everything anyone could and more for us all. And made us feel normal, which is sort of best of all – we're not pampered, allowances are made but not so's we feel useless. Like Radall, who was born without legs, but he does fine as a woodcrafter apprentice. And my own foot is getting stronger, it's almost as good now as anyone's, just a little weakness at times."

Rayenn could hardly believe it.

He could not have imagined in his wildest dreams such good treatment for anyone! He began to hope that; and to believe that Darellon's offer of friendship might truly be genuine – for the boy WAS outnumbered by girls the same age! Not that they were all bad; Serehana, Darellon's closest Weyr friend, was a good enough sort, not just as good as any boy but, Rayenn discovered, a friend of the Woodcraft apprentice Elissa whose fair minded kindness had led to the girl arranging that he be here in the first place!

T'rin was delighted to see the two lads getting on so well. Darellon was now of age for Impression, but he had definitely suffered from a lack of lads his own age! Unless one counted Serehana who was wilder than the maddest boy at times and so clearly suited to her foster mother Y'lara.

Of course there were difficult times. Sometimes, for no apparent reason, Rayenn would burst out in defiance, or go running off to hide: and T'rin was able to reassure Z'linda and Z'kan.

"I did the same thing, you know, to R'gar and T'lan" he explained. "People are so good to you, you feel as if you have to be horribly naughty – to check if they'll still stand by you. Because you kind of expect them to throw you out, which will prove what you know about people, but even so you're desperately hoping they won't stop loving you. But you feel that you need to find out in case you get used to feeling secure before they drop you in the dung."

Z'kan and Z'linda were horrified.

"What sort of people does he think we are?" demanded Z'linda indignantly.

"Whoa – he doesn't THINK anything!" declared T'rin. "He KNOWS he's been rejected before – by his mother, because of his fathering; by his father; and in a way too by the Woodcrafter Hall. He is scared to be too happy – in case it goes wrong. It's nothing to do with you, and I doubt he could even put it into words. I never could have at the time. It's only because I'm a Harper and can analyse how people think, and how I thought. Bad experience leaves its mark."

Z'kan clenched his fists.

"Maybe I didn't spend long enough with P'ren" he gritted. Z'linda laid a hand on his arm.

"Don't make yourself like them" she begged. "And of course, I suppose Rayenn is also afraid that when the baby arrives, we'll be more interested in our own child than in him."

T'rin nodded.

"I too worried about Rogan and Rofel" he said "Though I never knew at the time they were twins. For me that strengthened the bond when they arrived, even though I left the Weyr almost immediately for the Harper Hall; because I had had twin baby brothers once. And T'lan and R'gar made it clear to me that they loved me as much as the babes when I hung back a little. But it gives me another point in common with the lad; I'll take him fishing and talk to him."

Rayen was suspicious of being taken on a long hike by T'rin; but was delighted to be shown a hidden valley, virtually invisible from the air, complete with its own waterfall and pool. A rough cot was built against the valley wall, under its overhanging sides.

"I used to run away here a lot" began T'rin, conversationally as he made for the cot. "Ah, good, it's still all here" as he brought out battered cooking utensils, a flint and steel and dried wood. "Always replenish the woodstore that you use" he told the younger boy. "Then it's there if you or anyone else needs it."

As he lit a fire and set lines for fish, T'rin told the young lad his own story; and of his needs to test the boundaries of R'gar's and T'lana's acceptance of him: how he had been nervous of confessing a desire to be a harper lest they think him ungrateful; and how he realised that at last he had a real family again.

Rayenn listened. He got the point immediately for he was by no means dull.

"I – I just have to run sometimes" he excused himself. T'rin nodded understanding.

"I know. But, Rayenn, I'd lived Holdless. You haven't. So if you need to run, lad, run here. I'm the only person who knows of it – so far as I'm aware – and there's shelter from Thread and the elements and dried food in store that I replenish regularly. After all, it might save the life of some poor Llama herder or hunter caught out in Threadfall or bad weather. There's a trickle of a spring at the back of the cot – that's why I built it here – in case you've forgotten to fill the kettle and there's Threadfall. You'll not go thirsty even in high summer, for it never dries up. And there's shelter from Thread in the overhang if you want to leave the door open because you hate to be confined. and if you were gone too long, I'd know where to look for you in case you were injured or sick. If you'll do that for me – make this a base to run to?"

Rayenn nodded, his eyes filled with tears.

"Why are you so good to me?" he asked.

"Because I remember what it's like to be nobody's child and abused as a criminal" said T'rin. "Because no youngster ever ought to find themselves in that position; and because unless someone gives you a hand up, the least you can do is pass that on to someone else. As I'm sure you will some day."

As T'rin had surmised, from that day, Rayenn virtually gave up running away by himself!

Mi'a had been thinking very deeply about T'rin. Superficially he looked like the popular concept of a Harper – feckless and reckless, a new female conquest every month and a ready capacity for strong drink. It was not an impression that flippant T'rin did a lot to dispel. Yet there was the other side – his endless patience with the denser weyrchildren in basic instruction; his pains to help his own apprentices acquire their full potential; and his agonising over how to least hurt Allessa. Not to mention the pains he had taken over the strange lad Rayenn. It would be good to have a kind mate sorted out before Sukith matured enough to rise – but was T'rin the right person for her? They shared a love of harping with a love of dragons.

But it was not enough.

Mi'a felt sure that if Renpeth flew Sukith it would be a pleasant experience. She blushed, for she had heard several tales about dragonlust! Yet….would it spoil a friendship? Should she go to T'rin's weyr to see if they could start a relationship? It seemed somehow wrong.

Life could get very complex.

The same problem bothered T'rin too. He liked Mi'a a whole lot, and when she had Impressed he confessed to himself that he had hoped to form a bond like that of his foster parents! But it was not happening. Being of honest disposition, he took Mi'a for a long walk and told her of his musings.

The expression of relief on her face told him he had been right to be so blunt.

"T'rin, I like you. Very much. But you're right – it's not going to happen. Everyone has been writing us off as the perfect partners since you first took me as an apprentice; and I confess, it's an awful strain dealing with kindly meant playful comments about whether we're sharing your furs yet."

He looked surprised.

"Bunch of old women!" he said indignantly. "People have really coupled us together?"

She nodded.

"Not the logicators" she said hastily "I guess they know what's what….but the other girls and lower cavern women. You know, how romantic it all is and so on. But – but I'm not happy with it."

T'rin grinned at her and gave her the big smacking kiss of the sort he reserved for little Sagarra.

"Then there's no need to worry. I guess my weyrmate's egg hasn't been shelled yet" he said philosophically. "And yours is waiting for his dragon to find Sukith."

Curiosity about the state of affairs between T'rin and Mi'a burgeoned, as such things do in closed communities, especially on the unbridled tongues of incurable gossips with more romance than sense. It took, however, the normally monosyllabic Kullana to ask,

"T'rin, will you weyr with Mi'a?"

T'rin was so startled to get a whole sentence out of the little girl that he answered without thinking or damning her cheek,

"No."

Kullana smiled at him sunnily.

"Good" she said cryptically, and bent her head to her studies.

T'rin blinked.

"Good?" he murmured queryingly to himself. Then he shrugged. Whoever knew what vagaries went on in the mind of that child!

Still, the main thing was, she was born to be a Harper. And they had a fardling good Harper Hall at High Reaches!

Into the complexity of his love life – and T'rin was glad that at least the love of his dear Renpeth was uncomplicated – came a letter out of the blue. The message was brought in for T'rin by a visiting rider with messages from the Harper Hall; most of which were the usual and anticipated letters from T'rin's regular friends – several of which, it has to be said were joint compositions of dubious grammatical value – and one that was written on a grubby and ageing piece of cloth, T'rin thought sheeting, with a barely decipherable message on it. Intrigued, T'rin worked hard to read it.

"Dear T'rin" it began "I guess when you find out who wrote this you'll just want to throw it away; but I ask you, please read it through first.

"When you never came back I figured I driven you away – and I was kind of glad in a strange way, because it meant I had the power over you to do that. But I sort of missed seeing you; and I asked if you could be asked to visit.

"They told me then that you'd Impressed. I don't know how I felt, but I was angry because you always had all the luck and because you were gone. It had taken me a while to ask to see you; and now it's taken longer to screw up the gall to write to you. I've already chucked away three previous efforts to say the right thing. I guess I can only tell it like it is, and anyway I've only one piece of old bandage left that I scrounged when Faylina threw it away as too thin to use.

"I'm lonely and miserable, and maybe you'll say that it serves me right because I treated you bad. But please will you write to me? And if it's not too much to ask, could you come and see me for a few minutes if you're visiting?

"I use the instruments you brought for me to play. It does help some."

It was signed "Horgey".

T'rin stared at the missive for a long time; and his conscience smote him. He should have gone on one of his visits to the Harper Hall to see the crippled boy who had been his nemesis. After all, it was he, T'rin, who had, however unintentionally, broken the boy's back when he had fought against him for his life and freedom after spying on renegades. And he had told Master Robinton that he would try to help the embittered and brutalised bully.

T'rin thought hard; and finally wrote a note to be going on with.

"Horgey: I'm glad you're still playing. I feel bad about neglecting you, I hope you will forgive me. Renpeth's rather time consuming among other things!

"L'gal and I are getting something of a small Harper Hall together here at High Reaches, and teaching apprentices and weyr children has also been keeping me busy! L'gal's very good natured, so I'll see if I can cadge a lift off him to come and visit soon. Meantime, here's some paper to write letters or jot music on. T'rin".

T'rin sealed a package with several spare paper sheets from H'llon's workshop and asked the visiting Green Rider to take it back with him. Replies to his friends could wait; they'd not expect an immediate return in any case!

After dispatching his letter, T'rin asked to speak with T'bor, R'gar and L'gal; and outlined the history of his problems with Horgey, and the basics of the mission in which the former harper apprentice had been so badly injured. R'gar already knew much of the story, but listened gravely again as T'rin succinctly told the story.

"I felt bad about it" the young harper explained. "I had a loving family where he knew, I feel sure, nothing but knocks and abuse. I ended up with one of the firelizards he thought would be his" he caressed little white Prism "And I broke his back. I felt I should try to help him. I kind of made a promise to myself that I'd try to befriend him and show him that all people are not bad."

"The fact that he wrote to you, son" said R'gar "Demonstrates, I think, quite ably, that he learned something of that – for has he not turned to you?"

T'rin was much struck by this.

"I'd not thought of that" he said.

"If you set yourself the task of helping the boy" put in T'bor "Then you cannot and must not go back on that promise, even though you made it only to yourself. You are right to bring this up; for you will need the permission to go and visit him regularly. Or even, if you feel it right, to bring him to the Weyr. Shells know, we're used enough to people with extra needs. But in the meantime I hope and trust that L'gal will give you transport until Renpeth is himself able to do so; for this is a harper affair as well as it being a matter of honour."

L'gal nodded.

"Gladly, sir" he said. "Horgey was an obnoxious brat; but if there's any chance to improve him it should be taken. Besides, no harper let alone a dragonrider, breaks a vow."

"I'm sorry I didn't go see him before" T'rin was close to tears of contrition, feeling he had failed in his duties!

R'gar laid a hand on his foster son's shoulder.

"A lot has happened to you" he said. "He tried to get rid of your visits by sheer perversity. In a way, it might be better this way – he has come to acknowledge that he does crave your companionship! It's a valuable lesson for him."

T'rin nodded, grateful; R'gar was not given to saying comforting things just to make people feel better. And when he thought about it, he could see that Horgey had to learn some lessons for himself!