No matter how much goat's milk there is, people always want more. Delicate foods are almost impossible to get in District 12, at least for people who work in the coal mines. Lady's milk is treated like an expensive candy and I'm happy to sell to anyone who wants it. Suffice it to say, the trades are a breeze as usual. Something is different too, a weight that has lightened in my stomach.
While heading home out of the business district, I notice Gale strolling toward the Seam as well. "Gale!" I wave, my hand only as high as his eyes. He crosses the street to walk with me.
"Hi, Prim."
"What are you doing here? I thought you would be out hunting like you do."
"Oh, well, I was but," Gale points to the southwestern horizon. "It's looking like pretty heavy rain coming up." I hadn't noticed the dark clouds broiling and rolling this way, just the early fall breeze. It could be a chilly rain. "How are you handling everything, Prim?"
"Better, I think. Madge watched the Games with me yesterday and we talked a bit. I think she really helped." I tell Gale about what Madge had said and about how I decided to accept Katniss' choices.
Gale listens and then grunts. "Huh, that's strange."
"What?"
"I just came from the Undersee's. The strawberry bushes aren't too far from the fence so I did manage to pick some of them for the mayor. But I also wanted to see if Madge was okay."
I glance at Gale who is lost in thought. "What? I thought you didn't like Madge?"
Gale blushes somewhat. "It's not that I dislike her... It's..." He looks around and thinks better of continuing. "Madge ran out of school today crying. She even skipped the last class. That's not like her at all and... Honestly, I do give her a hard time about being the mayor's daughter and I kinda feel bad about it."
"Crying? Why was she crying?"
"I don't know. One of the guys in her class told me that she was being quiet like she always is." Gale bites his lip. "I just... I didn't realize she was that close to Katniss."
Madge wasn't though. They were distant. I wonder if she feels so isolated since Katniss was the only friend she had. How odd that would be. Your closest friend so distant that she barely knows you?
Then Gale voices another possibility. "Or maybe she feels guilty that she'll never come close to being selected in the reaping."
Still Madge's response to the Hunger Games this year has been intense. I remember the way she glared at the screen as if she could set the television on fire with her concentration. "Maybe she just wants Katniss to come home." I muse.
"That would be good," Gale agrees.
"Did you see her at the Undersee's?"
"Only for a few seconds, just long enough to make the trade. She didn't say anything."
"Hmm." We arrive at the Seam and I invite Gale into the house for some milk. "Gale? How are you dealing with this?" His expression quirks as if he doesn't understand what I'm asking. "How do you manage to do all this hunting and gathering and schoolwork and take care of me and Mom, on top of your family? Do you just ignore the Games as much as you can?"
Gale looks at the milk in his cup and ponders a reply. I can't help but think about the last words he wanted to say to Katniss. I wonder if my sister had heard those words before and if she had said them to Gale too. "Prim... We do what we have to do." He sips from the cup and hesitates saying, "Do... Do you want to know a secret?" I nod and sit down to listen. "I miss Katniss more than I miss my father. It's like having no air to breathe." He contemplates his next sentence. "I don't have a choice but to think about it, to catch every second of the broadcast that I can."
I drink the rest of my own milk. Gale watches the screen. Katniss is waiting in a tree where Rue is supposed to return. The two Careers are stalking, no where near the creek-side blind where Katniss hides. Marvel waits almost unmoving, which is really a feat in itself.
"If I could-" Gale stops himself and looks away.
"What? Tell me." I'm impatient. I don't like to think anyone knows anything that they aren't going to tell me. It's frustrating when people whisper around you because you feel left out. Adults do that a lot.
"If it weren't for the rules, I would've volunteered for you so Katniss wouldn't have to go."
A lilt of fault creeps through me again. I suppress it. Gale didn't mean to say anything except that he loves Katniss just like I do. Well, not exactly like I do. "Are you and Katniss, uh...?"
"No. We're close but she doesn't want a boyfriend." He looks down. "There are days where it burns me up and... I try to vent by talking about the Games and the Capitol. You can talk in the woods without worrying, you know? She doesn't seem to mind-didn't." He picks a tiny briar off his overcoat and tosses it toward the kitchen wastebasket. "She doesn't talk much about the Capitol, even though she feels the same way."
Katniss treats Gale differently than all the other boys. Even so, it's impossible to tell if it is tinged with romance because she doesn't really have other boys for friends. If she makes it back, Katniss ought to open up to the idea of being married one day. At least I hope she does. I know, I want to marry someone someday.
My father was my favorite person in the world. Things have been different since he died. Not altogether bad. Different.
There was one day; it was my fourth birthday, when Dad and Mom took Katniss and me to pick out an outfit. A new one! One that no one had ever worn before. I like light blue and picked out a light blue blouse and skirt with a fancy white lace along the bottom. At the time I had no concept of money. Mom and Dad must have saved for a long time for that present.
We were walking home as a family and singing. Dad's voice was soft and smooth; everyone loved to hear him sing. People smiled at us as we passed by the businesses and houses. Some folks waved. I even got comments on how cute the new clothes looked on me.
Between verses, Dad swept me into his arms and held me close, fingers tickling at my belly. I laughed and snuggled into his neck, feeling the scratchy prickle of his stubble. Even two-thirds of my life later, I can still remember the secure warmth of his cheek against mine. How my side squirmed when his gentle voice graced past my ear. Dad's lovely voice always tickled at me when he held me.
The walk home took a long time which was fine by me. A marvelous, spring sunset joined my family's lullabies. Katniss was only eight and wasn't able to keep our parents' pace, so we took our time. I contentedly fell asleep to the chorus, arms wrapped around Dad's neck.
When we got home, there was another present of orange juice shared amongst the family. It was so unique and sweet! Those days were full of bliss. I try to remember what happened to that outfit once I outgrew it. Sold like the others after Dad passed away, I suspect.
Allen Mellark stops by with a basket full of rolls. "Primrose," he offers the basket through the doorway. His voice is quiet and sharp. "Dad said to bring these here."
I take it. "Thank you, Allen. Do you want to come in and get a glass of milk?"
He's tempted, but I know what's going through his mind. It's not normal that the families of competing tributes would interact, much less be friendly. Never mind that the families aren't competing, just the tributes. Most likely both tributes will die under the Careers. Still, because we each hope that our own relative can win; the Everdeens and the Mellarks have a wedge driven between us.
Mr. Mellark and I are on very good terms, except he doesn't talk much at all and even less since the reaping. These past few weeks have been so difficult for me to get over the Katniss' selection that I have tacitly avoided the topic with the people who buy Lady's milk and cheese.
The baker's son turns down the invitation and walks away from our house. I call after him, "Allen, wait." He half turns around. "I'm real sorry about Peeta." He has hardly moved in days. Probably still bleeding, starving and certainly thirsty. "He's a good boy." Allen raises his eyes to meet mine, nods, and continues on into the rain.
After a while, Katniss climbs down from the tree and ventures back into the woods. Rue didn't show up, of course, so Katniss must know something is wrong. She moves deeper into the forest watchful for any ambush.
Mom comes home and we start dinner. Gale decides to go home to his family. This could be it, I think. Marvel's trap is too perfect. He's going to kill Katniss and then he's going to kill Rue. I know Katniss wants me to make peace with this, and in time maybe I can, but when I have to watch it... No guarantees.