I was strictly on bed rest, just for the day. It was bloody infuriating. And all Jasper's doing. Twiddling my thumbs all damn day with everyone falling over themselves to help me. And fucking Edward! If I had my hands on him right now, I'd strangle his neck. That stupid bloody boy that constantly kept his phone on him, didn't bloody well reply to me! I'd sent him about ten texts by now, and phone more times than I'd care to admit, and I was furious. Gradually, and thanks to Jasper's generous lending of the 'How I Met Your Mother' series, I got sleepy enough to sleep. I shot Edward an 'I love you' text, even though I was mad at him, but it made me feel better resolving my own problems before I slept.

The next morning I found chaos. Or more like, chaos found me. I had my morning chuck, it was getting earlier and earlier each day, and thankfully better and better. Pulled on a jumper of Edward's I had tucked away that no one actually knew was Edwards because it had been so long since he'd worn it in public, however he'd worn it for me just before he left, and, by gosh, it smelt heavenly when I'd slipped it on this morning.

I was still rubbing my eyes when I walked into the kitchen, and was faced, as stated before, with chaos. Coffee has nothing compared to a policeman sitting at your kitchen table to wake you up in the morning.

I saw Alice weeping in Jasper's arms, well that counted them out.

"Rosalie" I gasped, my whole being feeling like ribbons slipping away through my fingers. No, not my best friend. She and I hadn't even been on speaking terms, and now she was, what? Dead? The policeman stood from the table and took my arm.

"I'm so sorry" he whispered so sincerely, I actually believed it.

"No..." I looked at him, desperate for him to go, 'No, hey, kid, I'm just kidding!' but the pained expression on his face said everything.

I was close to collapsing into his broad chest, wishing for Edward, I saw the unmistakable blonde halo of Rose's hair.

"Rose?" she made a bee-line for me, and hit me hard in the chest, hanging on for dear life.

I held her close, feeling suddenly motherly, as I rubbed up and down her spin, thanking god he hadn't taken my bestest girl friend. She sobbed, convulsed almost, into my chest, into Edward's jumper. "Oh, Rosie, I thought I'd lost you. I'd never forgive "

"He's gone!" she interrupted, "my Edward is gone" and she set herself off on another fit of crying.

What? I replayed it over and over. HerEdward is gone. HER Edwardis gone. He was never mine. No, always hers.

"Shh... shh" I whispered over and over, continuing to console her for her supposed loss.

Emmett came to my rescue not five minutes later, but it felt like a life time. And for once, I couldn't cry. The numbness was paralysing. I just stood there. In all honesty I was somewhat calculating how long it was to drive to the nearest bridge, and jump off, but I decided that none of the bridges where tall enough to kill you, most probably just paralyse. No good. There was knives in the drawers though. Run a hot bath upstairs, slash the wrists, I could be dead in minutes. Or the bleach, I could scull down what was left of the bleach, but I wasn't sure whether that would completely work. No, the knives where the best.

Alice had snuck up behind me and touched my shoulder gently. I didn't acknowledge her until she slipped a small hand to my belly, over my bump. Ness. Vanessa. She'd looked exactly like her father, with bright green inquisitive eyes and long auburn hair. If I lost me, I lost her too. And I couldn't lose my stabling point.

"You snapped out of it?" she whispered.

I gulped, and nodded. A breath hitched in my throat. My Edward was gone.

"Good, because it was me that was going to find your naked arse in the tub" she was pale and very clammy.

I apologised with my eyes, and held onto her for dear life, the other around my middle, around my Nessie.

The policeman ushered us all to the table. Apparently neither Esme or Carlisle could bring themselves to identify the object that were found in Edward's Car.

"Wait, so you didn't find his body?" I asked, with a glimmer of hope.

The policeman shook his head solemnly, "no, however his car was found wrapped around a tree. There was a lot of blood, but no body. We presume that he'd somehow survived and got out, but the amount of blood that was lost was just phenomenal, no one could survive loosing that much blood"

I shook my head at him, "no!" I stated firmly, "no, that's not... that can't be right! Edward is over visiting family, he's with his Cousin right now!"

The man sucked in his lip, I was making him uncomfortable, I knew that, but I was damn well not letting go without a fight. Or at least all the details I could damn well get. "We contacted Tanya, his cousin, she told us he'd flown back early to see his girlfriend, he was going to propose"

Rosalie looked up at that, "girlfriend? Edward didn't have a girlfriend, let alone anyone..." her voice trailed off, "... you don't think he was going to try to propose to me, right? He wouldn't think that a ring would get us back together, right? Oh my God, what if he was! I mean, I caused all this!" she exclaimed, the insanity of grief setting in.

"No, Rose, it wasn't you" I quietly told her, letting her off the hook, I didn't know why though, I wanted to see that bitch suffer, how dare she think My Edward was hers! "Edward was seeing someone for a while now, he just didn't want to say anything because he was scared of how you would react, you know how you two are!"

The hurt in her eyes was evident, shit! "What? Why? Who was he seeing?"

"Rose? Does it really matter?" oh, crap, by the look of Rose's bristled skin, that didn't come out well.

"Yes it matters, Isabella. She should be with us, mourning with us, not by herself. She has been told hasn't she?" Rose directed the question at the policeman, but I answered.

"Yeah, she's been told" I replied coldly, "she wanted to be by herself at the moment. I'll get back to her later"

The policeman looked at me as if to say 'how the hell do you know', and considering he knew I hadn't left the room, I simply stared back blankly.

"So, we've established he was to propose, do you have stuff for us to identify or something?" Okay, okay, my Dad's a cop, I know how procedure works, and I know this wasn't exactly it, but I needed to see it really wasn't Edward in that car. It was some stupid thief or something that had left everything in the car.

The cop hesitated, then pulled out a plastic bag full of things. A phone, a wallet, cracked black ray-ban's and the big one, a little black box. Pulling the seal open, the cop gently slid the items on the table. They were impeccably clean. There must have been blood on them before that had been collected and cleaned off. It was the phone. The iPhone, to be correct, the cover was a little worse for wear, but it was the same cover. I touched the centre button. The screen lit up with a photo of me. Well, a photo of my body. I wondered when he had taken the photo, which seemed to be candle lit, that so well showed off the side of my left boob, the curve of my back and my gluteus maximus. I hadn't seen this one before. My lips involuntarily turned upwards slightly as I swiped across the lower screen. And there, in front of the picture of us in a chaste kiss was what I'd dreaded so deeply.

32 missed calls.

I took my own phone out, hiding it under the table, and dialled Edward's number in the keypad, somewhere in the back of my mind was saying 'for the last time' but I ignored them. After hitting send, I held my breath. 'Don't ring, don't ring. Please, don't ring' I chanted.

'...This is the first day of my life, I'm Glad I didn't die before I met you...' the ringtone played.

A huge heart with B+E embossed in flashed to the screen.

Mon Amore, appeared too. Mon amore, My love.

I disconnected the call with a sigh, "Mmm Hmm!" I nodded, tears rimming my eyes, "it's him" I slid the phone back with shaky fingers. "Now, if you'll excuse me"

I scrapped the chair legs across the linoleum floor with a horrid skidding sound, and quickly made my way to the exit.

I didn't stop power walking until I hit the trees, not far from our house.

"Oh, Edward! I am so mad at you right now!" I cried, letting the tears go. "Geez, Edward! Why? Huh? You could have waited one more day, but no, you had to be the big hero and bring the ring home right away! For fuck sake, I'd already said Yes!" I yelled the profanity and everything after into the trees. Then sobbed. The smell of him was on me, in my bed, imbedded in my skin. It was like he was right here, standing right next to me yet I felt so lost.

"Bella?" Jasper asked quietly.

I lunged towards him and he took me into his open, awaiting arms.

He ran his fingers gently through my hair, detangling it as he did. It was a trait I was so used to from Edward.

"He loved you so much, you know" he whispered in my ear, so softly he talked, I wasn't sure wether I'd heard him right.

Looking up at him, I fought with my emotions trying to keep them in check, "what do you mean? Did you know him?"

Jasper seemed to be struggling just as much as me, he finally nodded and tried a small smile on for size, "he is..." he chewed on his bottom lip, and rolled his eyes up, willing the tears not to fall,
"was...' he cracked then, with a little hitch in his voice, and tears streaming from his eyes, "he's my cousin" he finally forced out, "Tanya is my sister, I'm over here to surprise him when he got back"

I gasped, yes, I remembered Edward talking so highly of his cousin, who wanted to be an Obstetrician, and I laughed because I thought it was weird and somewhat gross that a male would want to be that.

"No" I shook my head, taking his broken face in my hands, and wiping away the tears that fell from his blue-green eyes, "no, he was your brother" I told him with such certainty, and it cracked him a bit further.

And instead of my crying into his chest, he sobbed violently into my neck as I held him close, constantly rubbing my hands over his back.

We stood there grieving with each other for unknown quantity of time, but when Alice did finally come looking for us the sun was high in the sky, clouds nowhere to be seen. It was as if God was ceasing to grieve with us, no dark and story clouds, no angry thunder or lightning, no miserable drizzling rain. The sun shined, the birds twittered, the animals were brave and careless in the trees.

When Jasper was wretched from my arms, I felt so empty. I walked to my room, locked the door, and crashed out on the bed. Exhausted from grieving, I curled up against 'Edwards' pillow, and slipped back into my unconscious state.