Disclaimer: I do not, as much as I wish I did, own OTH or any of the songs in this story. All I own is the plot of the story, and I barely own that.

AN: Soooo, I hope all the Bake fans enjoy this chapter! And I really hope that everyone else resists their urge to murder me. Haha.

Thanks so much for reading; you all mean the world to me. This chapter is dedicated to a few good friends. Lelina! Bert! Shannon! My new friend Tiffanee! And of course cute little Artemi!

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Chapter 19: Flying My Guilt Over A Quilt

Twenty-nine seconds.

He tightened his grip on the petite brunette as the clock ticked along slowly. Her eyes were frightened and gaping as she stared down at the small stick; he glanced at the timer and sighed quietly.

Twenty-seven seconds.

She placed her right hand on her stomach and leaned into him, reveling in his calming scent. She'd almost forgotten how warm his arms were, how easily she forgot the world when he was around. She glanced away from the small stick, their eyes meeting. Hazel versus brown.

Twenty-three seconds.

He tucked a piece of hair behind her ear, smiling softly, "There are days when she's all I think about. I picture her sweet smile and innocent eyes and suddenly this life doesn't seem so hard. The monotony of this lifestyle doesn't matter anymore, and I feel secure. I only wish the two of you were here. I miss waking up and knowing that you're just a room away if I need you."

Brooke's eyes softened and tears entered her eyes, "You remember?"

He nodded, "It was your seventh email; you sent it a few weeks after you visited me in Savannah. I read it over and over again, hoping that it would somehow change the way you looked at me. I wanted you to see me as something more than Peyton's ex…"

Seventeen seconds.

"You were never just Peyton's ex. I was just scared of letting myself fall for another person who knew Peyton Sawyer." She glanced down sadly, the pregnancy test forgotten, "I'll never be her."

"I don't want you to be. I never wanted that from you. I wanted the spunky girl who wrote me silly emails about her evil mother and the girl who traveled all the way from New York to South Carolina in order to taste the 'world's best strawberry cheesecake.' That's the girl I wanted…The girl I want."

Twelve seconds.

Her breath caught in her throat and she ran her fingertips over the soft stubble on his cheek. He rubbed his cheek against the palm of her hand, closing his eyes. She licked her suddenly dry lips, her voice soft in the quiet room, "Your first email was beautiful. There was such poetry in your words. You talked about your daughter like she was this untainted beauty; you said that nothing in the world would ever compare to her smile, and nothing in the world would ever tear your heart apart like the sight of her tears." Brooke's eye shined brightly as she pulled her hand away and looked deep into his gaze, "And the first time I heard you singing in that bar, I fell so hard. Your music and your soul were intertwined that night, and I felt like I knew you in a way that no one else ever would. Because you wrote to me, you were only mine." She glanced down, "It was silly, I know."

Three seconds.

He shook his head, "No, it's not silly."

She inhaled deeply and her gaze fell to his lips as he slowly dipped his head, their lips only a hairsbreadth away, "Jake…" her voice shook slightly, even as her eyes began to drift closed, "We can't…"

DING.

Brooke slammed her eyes shut at the sound of the timer going off, and Jake slid himself away from her on the bed. They stared at one another for a moment, guilt and lust pulsating in their blood. Her breathing was raggedy as she pushed her feelings for the single father away and picked up the small stick. Tears sprang to her eyes as she looked at it, shaking her head at him in a way that revealed nothing.

Jake walked over to her then, laying his hand on her shoulder as if there hadn't almost been a kiss moments before, "So what's the verdict?"

XxXxXxXxXxX

"So what's the verdict? Are we playing Guitar Hero or Rock Band?"

Sam raised an eyebrow at the over-excited musician, "Is there a difference?"

Her eyes shifted to the blue-eyed five year old next to her who was nodding wildly at her as if her question was absurd. She grinned at his animated face and glanced back at the musician, seeing that he was just as thrilled, and his silly grin was just as large and bright as the small boy's. She rolled her eyes with a small laugh and fell back onto the couch, figuring that she'd just let the two boys figure it out for themselves.

Jamie, who was about a third of Chris's height, pointed to the Guitar Hero CD case, "Uncle Skills always plays it with me, but he's not very good." His bright smile faded slightly, "Aunt Brooke used to play with me too, but she's been very sad lately."

Chris and Sam exchanged a look, both confused by the cheerless tone of the small boy's words. The moody teenager gave a small smile and picked up the Guitar Hero box, "So, are we gonna get this party started or what?"

Jamie's dower mood immediately lifted at her words, and within minutes he began giving her pointers on how to effectively hit the keys at the correct time. Chris smiled slightly at the sight, though his eyes remained worried, the blue darkening slightly as he thought of the beautiful brunette that had become his best friend over the years.

Chris stood, ruffling first the young boy's hair and then the teenaged girl's. He smiled innocently at the annoyed look Sam gave him, her eyebrow raising in a fashion that was far too much like Brooke. He shook his head of the thought and started for the stairs, his curiosity over what exactly Brooke kept in her "Lucas Box" suddenly getting the better of him.

Within seconds he stood before her closed door, his hand resting flat against the grainy wood. The moment he entered the room, he was assaulted by feelings on nostalgia. There were pictures everywhere, scattered and random, and her bed was covered with a scarlet comforter. But what really caught his eye was the laptop lying in the center of her bed; he smiled, immediately recognizing the sticker on the front cover: The Keller Instinct. He glanced at it, his memories swimming fondly in his mind, and for a moment he almost forgot his reason for entering her room.

He shook his head to free himself from his memories and kneeled next to the bed, his fingers grazing the box gently for a second before he slid it from beneath its confines. The box was exactly as he remembered, completely bare on the outside but filled to the brim with memories on the inside. He opened the box slowly and frowned at the sight of the letters he knew inhabited the box.

He groaned aloud and closed his eyes, "Damn it." He ran his fingers gently against the envelope for letter eighty-six. He could feel his anger burning brightly within him as he silently fingered the open envelope, shocked that Lucas would use Chris's suggestion to look at her memory box to read her private letter. He glared at the box as he quickly shoved it back under her bed and whispered softly to himself, "She's going to murder me…"

XxXxXxXxXxX

His eyes were hard and his voice even harder, "You never gave me a reason to trust you."

Peyton frowned at his harsh tone, "You never wanted to trust me. You were just waiting for something to go wrong with us!"

The producer rolled his eyes and shook his head angrily, "You cannot seriously be blaming our breakup on me!"

"You left me!"

"Damn it, Peyton!" She jumped slightly at his aggravated tone, "You owned at least twenty copies of that damn book by the time I left." He shook his head sadly, "You ruined us…All I did was finally admit that it was over." His gaze softened, "And maybe that's what I need to do now?"

Peyton shook her head, confusion sweeping across her face, "I don't understand; I thought you guys were happy?" She rolled her eyes before he had a chance to answer her, "Brooke loves you. Whatever it is that's bothering you at the moment, get over it."

He looked at her indignantly, "It's not that easy."

"Yes it is. If you love her, then you have to get over it."

He swallowed hard and looked into the blonde's eyes, "She kissed Lucas."

Julian sat back, his eyes shocked as Peyton burst into a sea of giggles. Within seconds, tears began streaming down her cheeks and she gasped for breath, her laughter continuing to flow from her lips.

"Peyton!"

She covered her mouth to stop the next influx of giggles, "I'm sorry…but do you really expect me to believe that Brooke and Lucas kissed? I mean, come on, be serious."

"I am."

Her smile fell slightly, "They didn't…They wouldn't…He loves me."

He shrugged, his eyes drooping slightly, "Maybe he does, but he still kissed my girlfriend." His eyes fell to her hands which were now shaking as they lay against her flat, but pregnant, belly. "There's more."

Peyton nodded for him to continue, though they both knew that she secretly wished he wouldn't, and inadvertently held her breath, afraid of what might happen once his next words were released into the warm night air.

His gaze dropped even further, following patterns on the worn carpet, "I found letters in a box under her bed, they were all addressed to him."

She shook her head then, a sigh of relief billowing from her lips, "She wrote him those letters in high school, Jules. Brooke just has this thing about throwing memories away; she says that every hardship she has ever faced was for a reason…and that's what Lucas was, a hardship, a memory. She doesn't love him now; maybe she never really did."

"She loves him, Peyt." He groaned and stood, his eyes alert and angry, "I thought this entire time that the guy I had to worry about losing her to was Jagielski…I mean, after seeing them in bed together, their lips so close to touching, I was sure that she still had warm, fuzzy feelings for him, but after seeing that kiss and then reading those letters, I'm not so sure anymore."

Peyton's eyes grew wide, her mind having blacked everything out past Julian's words about Jake, "Brooke slept with Jake?"

Julian immediately shook his head, trying to remove that thought from his mind, "No, but I thought I saw…I don't know. I just feel like she'll never be mine. There's always going to be someone standing in our way…someone she loves more than she'll ever love me."

Peyton's eyes made a sweep of the room, her heart hurting from the knowledge that her fiancé and best friend had kissed and, if she was honest with herself, the knowledge that her first love may have found love elsewhere. She gasped slightly when her eyes landed on his end table and tears entered her green orbs. She stood on shaking legs and ran her fingertips along the ticket lying near the phone.

She swallowed back the lump in her throat and rubbed at her eyes, trying to hide her tears, "You're leaving? When are you coming back?"

"I'm not." He frowned, not looking at her, "My father offered me the deal of a lifetime, Peyt. I can't stay…"

"What about the movie?"

He sighed, looking up at her, "Most of the production is done, but I'll come back if I'm needed." He quickly wiped a tear off his cheek, "This is something I have to do."

"And Brooke? What about her?"

"She doesn't need me…"

Silence consumed the room as heartbreak began to build within the two former lovers. Because in that moment, it became clear to Julian that the decision he was making was the right one. Brooke didn't need him nearly as much as he knew he needed her.

Peyton stood, heading toward the door, "Lucas loves me…and Brooke loves you. Don't throw it away…no matter what you may think, they love us."

"No, they love you. And each other…"

XxXxXxXxXxX

"Do you still love her?"

Lucas sighed loudly, lifting his eyes defiantly toward his younger brother, "I love Peyton…"

Nathan raised an eyebrow, "I meant Brooke."

"I know."

Nathan groaned, frustration clouding his eyes, "You shouldn't have kissed her."

Lucas rolled his eyes, "You shouldn't have set us up."

The younger man glared, "Why do you always have to hurt her? Her heart is a mess, man. Figure out your feelings and quit playing games. She deserves better than that."

The brooding blond frowned petulantly, "I'm not playing games. I made a mistake…I love Peyton. I chose Peyton. Brooke's just…"

Nathan shook his head angrily, "Brooke's not just anything! Quit belittling her!"

"I'm not!"

"You don't get it man. She might not survive another broken heart. Especially not when you're the one to cause it."

The older man bit his bottom lip, his eyes squinting as he stared at a picture on the wall, "I never meant to hurt Brooke, not in high school, and certainly not when I kissed her the other night." He glanced down, his heart hurting slightly, "But she has this power over me…something Peyton never had." Nathan opened his mouth to speak but Lucas carried on as if his brother being present wasn't necessary for the conversation to continue, "But Peyton and I have this…this thing that just works." He shrugged slightly, "We belong together. She's my soul mate."

His brother scoffs, his voice sarcastic, "Wow, man, could you sound any more enthusiastic?" He rolled his eyes and shook his head, "If she's the one, then she's the one, but don't stay together because of fate or providence or whatever. Stay together for love…"

Lucas nodded, his eyes resting on a picture of Brooke and Peyton laughing together. His eyes looked less sure than they had minutes before as he uttered his next words quietly, "She's the one."

XxXxXxXxXxX

The musician sighs, running his fingers through his hair.

"Maybe," he tried to reason with himself, "Maybe, she opened the letters. Maybe it wasn't Lucas…maybe she won't kick my ass for this…"

He dropped his head into his hands, groaning loudly, his voice echoing slightly in the large room. When he lifted his head, his eyes were again met with the sight of her laptop, and, though it was closed, he could see the light that signified that the power was on. His eyes scanned the room as he placed the computer in his lap, his curiosity getting the better of him. A small grin graced his face as he opened the laptop and found himself staring at several emails from either Jake to Brooke or Brooke to Jake.

He bit his bottom lip and began rifling through them, his grin growing by the second. His eyes softened as he read one that Brooke had written to Jake shortly after returning home to Tree Hill a few months ago.

"I can still feel you," he read aloud, "You're everywhere, you and Jenny. I always see parents with their children, and she's always there. You're always there…I miss you." He swallowed hard at the emotion she'd written, feeling a lump beginning to grow in his throat, "Peyton called and asked me to come home, so I did. She needed me, like always…I just wish that her need of me didn't have to affect us; I still think about you. I hope that's okay to say?

"I bought a house for Peyt and me, and every time I hear her stomp down the stairs when she's in one of her moods, I half-expect to see you, all grumpy from something Chris said or extremely tired because Jenny had a bad dream. I miss seeing you in the mornings, but I guess we'll always have New York. I just wish it didn't have to end there. I miss you so much. Take care of our girl and make sure she knows how much I love her. And I still…you know."

Chris sat there with a small smile on his face as he quickly reread the email, "Brooke and Jake?"

He shook his head with a grin and closed the laptop, practically skipping down the stairs where Jamie was now kicking Sam's butt at Guitar Hero. He sat behind them on the couch, his eyes gazing at them fondly as he thought of his two best friends getting together.

Sam turned gave him a silly grin, "Wanna play?"

He nodded and took the guitar from her, his grin never waning.

XxXxXxXxXxX

The bubbly brunette nuzzled into the single father's chest, her fingers burying themselves in the creases of his shirt. Tears were pouring down her cheeks as they held each other tightly, his fingers drawing comforting patterns on her back. She'd been crying uncontrollably since they'd read the results on the pregnancy test, and his heart broke slightly at the sight. He glanced toward the door expectantly, his patience slowly dissipating; he'd called Haley about twenty minutes ago after Brooke's first wave of tears began, but she had yet to show up.

Jake pressed a kiss against the top of her head, "Shh, it'll be okay, Brooke…everything's going to be okay. I promise."

She nodded against his chest and her tears slowed slightly, "I'm sorry…I don't know what's wrong with me."

He smiled fondly at her, pulling back slightly so that their foreheads were touching, "There is nothing wrong with you. You're perfect…"

She inhaled sharply, her eyes shooting from his eyes to lips and back again. He gently rubbed his nose back and forth against hers, not noticing the confused pair of brown eyes watching them.

Haley cleared her throat loudly, and the two friends quickly pulled themselves apart, Brooke throwing herself into the small brunette's arms. Haley closed her eyes and held her best friend tightly, looking at Jake over Brooke's shoulder in confusion. He sighed quietly and held up the pregnancy test. Her eyes immediately focused on the tiny pink plus mark and she pulled back from Brooke, her eyes slightly unfocused.

"You're pregnant?"

Brooke nodded, rubbing at her tears, "Yeah."

Haley's gaze softened, though she still seemed confused, "Isn't that a good thing? That's what you wanted right?"

Brooke's hazel eyes filled with a fresh batch of tears, "We're not ready…he's not ready. I'm scared, Hales."

Haley pulled the other girl back into her arms, holding her tightly, "Everything will be okay, Tigger."

Brooke nodded against the other woman's shoulder and smiled when she felt Jake wrap his arms around her as well. She tilted her head so that it lay on his shoulder, not seeing the slightly worried expression on Haley's face as she did so.

TBC…