YAY TWO CHAPTERS IN THE SAME WEEK:D haha I felt that you guys needed one after my absence haha. Well, I hope you like it, cause it is my longest chapter!

disclaimer: Seeing as how it is on this site it should be implies that I don't own Degrassi or its characters, just Carly and the story.

P.S. A big thanks to ThatPrettyStare for being my beta:D

Eli knew that Clare was hiding something. Her bright blue eyes always seemed to give her away. At this point, there was no way he was going to push the matter even further. She wasn't one to open up easily, that much he knew. One day she would tell him everything; that day might not be for years, but it would happen. Eli admired Clare, for the fact that she was able to handle things this way. Every day he saw stories on the news that always told of how people would go the easy way out. Not Clare. She lived with that memory. She chose to live with that memory. So for the time being he would let it go.

The final bell rang out through the halls of Degrassi. Eli reluctantly slid out of his seat, and headed towards the door of his history class. Two girls behind him were quietly whispering, gossiping about the year before, not noticing. He was used to this by now. It had been a year since what happened with Julia, and people were still talking.

Some might think that the cause of the whispers would be the fact that he wore all black and hung out with the weird kids. That used to be the reason, but not anymore. Now the whispers ran deeper; reopening a wound that he wished would just fade away. They were the rumors that reminded him all too much of Julia. The two were so in love. Anyone could tell you how he cared for her, protected her. He said that he would never hurt her, and with what happened he felt as if he failed on keeping that promise. Her death left a hole in his heart. He tried filling it with many things; alcohol, drugs, and his worse habit: hoarding. The alcohol lasted not even a week. He didn't like the burning it left in his throat. The drugs lasted longer but soon died out. Only the hoarding has stayed with him.

He felt that if he got rid of things, her memory would die. Every time someone would try to clean his belongings, he would break down. He couldn't explain why this would happen, but he almost couldn't stop himself. Even therapists didn't help. Carly was the only one who knew about his issues. She helped him through everything, and she truly was like his sister.

Then there's Clare.

Whenever Eli was around her he didn't think about Julia. He didn't think about all the pain, and he was actually able to be himself. He was so lost in thought that he didn't notice Adam running up behind him.

"Hey dude!" Adam exclaimed, making Eli lose his train of thought. "Whatchya thinking about? Could it be our darling Clare Edwards perhaps?"

"Do you find it necessary to be extremely annoying and stupid all the time?"

"Grrr you're feisty, and yes, I do," Adam joked, not thinking twice about the empty insult. "So what happened at lunch between you and little Miss Clare?" Eli didn't know if he should tell him about what Clare had said.

"Well I found her crying, and she told me some...stuff."

"Hmm stuff, very detailed, care to elaborate?"

"Well, she told me why she moved here…and, you know, about other things, but I know that she didn't exactly tell me the whole story. I'm not sure if I should tell you or not. I mean, I should probably let her explain herself..." Eli rambled on. He wasn't the kind of guy to get nervous, but when he did it seemed as if he got a case of verbal diarrhea.

"Okay, calm down. Deep breaths, Eli." Eli knew that Adam wouldn't try to pry, and it was times like this where that came in handy. Adam had his own dirty little secret that he had yet to tell Clare, so he decided just to stay out of her story until she was ready to tell him. He treated people how he would want to be treated, and seeing as how he hasn't told Clare his secret he didn't expect to find out hers yet. "Hey, want to head over to The Dot real quick?"

"Why not," Eli replied as the two boys walked out of Degrassi towards Morty.

Clare was lying on her bed, staring straight up at the ceiling listening to music. That was her only escape at the moment. The quiet melodies calmed her down, and helped let her know that things would always get better. Numbers lit up on her bright pink alarm clock signaling that four o' clock had just hit, and Carly would be home any minute from school.

But she didn't want to talk to anyone. She didn't know if she would be able to handle telling her story for a second time. The memories started suffocating her again, and she needed a release. At least ten times that day she had felt that need to just reach out for the razor, but at least ten times she found herself stopping. She had already shed enough blood due to her problems. This was the first step in a long, much needed journey towards normalcy.

Clare deeply sighed as she heard the front door being slammed shut. She knew what would be coming, but she didn't know if she was ready. Carly deserved to know the truth. Slipping on her fuzzy, light blue slippers, Clare slowly walked down the winding staircase. She saw Carly setting her backpack down on the navy blue couch, and hesitantly walked over to her.

"Hey sis," Carly said the second she noticed Clare standing behind her. "Something wrong?"

"Um, yes, well no...I mean...I don't know, but there's something that I need to tell you."

"Okay...shoot." Clare started to tell Carly the same story she had told Eli only a few hours before. She still left out the second half of the story, trying to tell herself that she would tell them the whole thing later. When Clare was done, tears brimmed at the edges of Carly's eyes. Instead of saying anything, she pulled Clare into a warm embrace.

In this tiny moment Clare realized that her life was finally turning around for the better.