A/N: Hey, I am so extremely sorry that I haven't updated in about two weeks, but I have been super busy with babysitting every week day and having graduation/ birthday parties on the weekends and such. But here it goes, the third chapter. Enjoy and please read and review!

In a matter of fifteen minutes tops I had everything that I could think a girl would need who was going to a foreign country to have closure with a boy in a band.

The navy blue suitcase that held all my clothes was on the floor by the door, placed next to my duffel bag as I hugged my mom goodbye. As I stood there squeezing her tightly around her waist, I thought how a regular mother should never allow her teenage daughter to go around the world for a boy, but that thought was quickly released when I remembered my mother was certainly not a regular mother. My mom was more of a romantic, and a friend to me, more than she is a mother. I decided not to contemplate the pros and cons of having a friend over a mom and just except it as it was.

I gave my brother a quick hug too and then picked up my bags and left. I placed them in the back of Razor's silver car and hopped into the passenger seat. I buckled up and we were on our way.

We sat in silence for a good five minutes. I felt Razor looking at me as he drove, but I didn't make eye contact. I didn't know what he wanted to say to me and I didn't want to talk to him about Damon. I still feel uncomfortable about that. I know that he liked me and I know that he is now okay with the fact the Damon and I are more than friends. I guess I don't feel uncomfortable speaking to him about Damon, just slightly guilty.

He finally speaks, realizing that I will never meet his gaze, "So. How you feeling?"

It's funny. It seems like he was waiting so long for me to talk to him and now once he spoke he refused to look at me and pretended like he was focusing intensely on the road, when I really know that he wasn't taking in any sort of his surroundings. He also seemed fidgety and nervous. Maybe Damon and I being together is an uncomfortable thing for him.

"Good." I answer, simply. I now am careful not to seem too thrilled, since it appears that he no longer is happy about this trip.

He doesn't have anything else to say and neither do I so we just sit in the car in silence for another couple of minutes, except this time with the slightest amount of tension. Plus, I no longer feel Razor's eyes burning a whole onto the side of my head. I still can't decide if that's a good thing or not.

At least twenty minutes had to go by with complete silence. No radio or anything. Just complete silence. Razor seems to clear his throat, then he begins, " I am not happy about taking you to France. I mean, I am happy about going there with you, I just wish there were different circumstances."

His voice is low and shaky. He didn't once take his eyes of the trail of cars and trucks in front of him. I didn't know what to say, but that was okay because he wasn't done speaking.

"I'm not going to lie to protect you, Emily, I still have feelings for you." He finally looks at me. I've been staring at him for this whole speech, so now our eyes meet. His speech is genuine and real. I certainly appreciate that. I just don't feel the same way, but I don't dare say that out loud, at least not right now.

He finally turns back to the road and goes on, "I know you don't have feelings for me, and I know that you love Damon.

"I also hope that you know the only reason I am supporting this whole relationship or hooking up or just talking a lot about your gymnastics and his music and your fights and whatever the hell else you do is because he loves you too.

"Damon has been my best buddy since we were three, he moved in down the block from me." He smiles, obviously reminiscing about his childhood experiences.

"Even as a kid he was messed up, dark and hidden. He was the only kid I've ever experienced, ever, who was so freaking messed up, but he was still my best friend. And Emily, let me tell you, when you have a best friend for fourteen years, and all you want is for him to be happy, to love someone who loves him back, then you give him what does that. Even if it's yours or something that you want, or even need, you give that up for your best friend because it's the first time you've ever seen him smile like that. It's the first goddam time that he's genuinely happy and you gotta give him that."

He keeps repeating the last sentence over. This is a side of Razor I've never seen. If I didn't know any better, I would've thought he could've killed me right there. He was so intense and dark himself. His voice seemed shallow, but meaningful at the same time. I also think he was crying. I didn't know what to do, or how to react. Somewhere in his rant we ended up the parking lot of the airport, and we were parked.

I felt so bad for Razor. I felt like crying for him, but he was doing enough of that for himself. I still had no idea how to go about helping him, so I did the first thing that came to my mind. I kissed him.

A/N: Okayyyy, so there it is. I want to get it posted already and I don't have time to proof read, so I am truly sorry for any grammatical errors. Thanks so much for reading and please review! –Megan AKA ToBecomeAClown