Hello you wonderful people! I'd like to take a moment to thank everyone who alerted/favorited/reviewed! It means a lot to me *tear* Anywhoo, BandanaGurl, I hope you is enjoying this as much as I have been writing it! Well, I am writing this after drinking two medium French vanilla ice coffees with a shot of mocha cream and sugar! Mmmm, coffee! Um… yea. I feel wicked bad I haven't had time to update! To much school work and essays and Finals were last week and just... Ermerner! Then fanfic was being a pain in the tush and just... I feel super bad! If you hate me, I don't blame you... Now that I have wasted a couple minutes of your life that you will never get back, on with the story!
THERE IS SWEARING IN THIS AND STUFF!
Disclaimer: If I owned Big Time Rush, I would be drinking coffee all the time and I would be married to Logan. Unless he was shorter or not tall enough for me. Then, I shall move onto Kendall and his sexy man brows!
Author's POV: (Saturday 7:45 A.M.)
*With Carlos*
'Beep Beep Beep'
"What the hell is that racquet?" A sleepy Carlos says, rolling to face his alarm clock.
"Carlos, time to wake up!" Carlos's 20 year old brother, Roberto says, coming into his room.
"Yea, and it's time for you to move out." Carlos responds, pulling the covers over his head.
Roberto bites back a smirk before jumping on top of Carlos. "GET UP!" Roberto screams in Carlos's ear, scaring him.
Carlos, shocked from the loud noise, falls off his bed, banging his head off his endtable.
"Son of a bi-!" Carlos starts before being cut off by his Papi.
"Hijo! Language!" Mr. Garcia says, standing in his doorway.
"Sorry Papi." Carlos mutters quietly, while shooting a glare at his laughing brother.
"Roberto, out. Carlos needs to get ready for detention." Mr. Garcia says before going downstairs.
Carlos looks at Roberto glaring before looking at his clock. Noticicing he had to be at school in 15 minutes he jumps up grabbing black baggy jeans, a green and black graphic t-shirt and a black sweatshirt. He put on his converse before yelling out a quick goodbye and running to school. He was the first one there so he walked into the library and chose the farthest seat he could, pulling his hood over his head.
*With Logan* (Same time as before)
Logan had woken up at 6:30 A.M. to make his dad breakfast and get ready. Logan watched t.v. for what felt like a little while when really it had been almost an hour. Noticing it was 7:45 he quickly gets up before heading to his room to get dressed. Feeling like crap he threw on black skinny jeans, a red button down t-shirt and a black cardigan. He silently slipped on his black vans, before heading out the door to school. He had to take a lot of back alleys, seeing as he did live on the badside of town, before finally entering the part where it was fine to walk without the fear of being mugged. Logan quickly walked with his head down, trying to get to school as quickly as possible. Someone sped by and since it had rained the night before, the water splashed up, covering him in rain, dirt and mud. Logan glances up, tears streaming out of his eyes, and sees Kendall Knight driving by laughing.
"Son of a fucking bitch." Logan swears, wiping his face with his sleeve.
*With Kendall* (Same time as the past two times)
Kendall woke up at 7:30 realizing he really didn't need to get up early. There was no one he had to impress in detention so he could just throw whatever he wanted on.
"Kendall, time to wake up!" He hears his mom call from downstairs.
Realizing he wouldn't be able to stay in bed any longer, Kendall frowns before throwing on some baggy jeans and a gray sweatshirt. He jumps up slipping on his favorite pair of black vans and runs downstairs. He grabs an apple before rushing out to his Nissan Pathfinder. He turns up the music quickly, Eminem blaring out of the stereo. Almost at the school Kendall sees his favorite victim, the nerd Logan.
"This is for standing up for yourself. Fucker." Kendall mutters zooming by, making the water splash onto the nerd.
Kendall quickly got to school and walked into the library. Seeing the retard Carlos, sitting in the back he decides to torture him a little.
"Hey retard, get the fuck outta my seat." Kendall says, walking over to Carlos, a smirk on his face.
"I don't see you name on it." Carlos replies, done with everyone calling him a retard.
"Really? Would you like to see your blood on it?" Kendall asks, making a fist.
"Fucking hate everyone..." Carlos mutters, grabbing his stuff and moving to the front of the library.
"We know who fucking rules the school." Kendall say, with a twisted smile on his face sitting down in the seat.
*With James* (still the same time)
James, being the diva he is, woke up at 5:30 in the morning to take a shower, comb and blow dry his hair, pick out the perfect outfit, and shoes that matched. When he put on his black skinny jeans, white t-shirt and black leather jacket, he threw on some black and white checkered vans and got his car keys. He yelled a quick goodbye to his mom and ran to his car. On the way there he listened to All Time Low, and had the windows and tops down. Almost at the school he noticed the school nerd Logan. Deciding he would be a good Samaritan, he rolls down his window.
"Hey dude, do you want a ride?" James calls out.
Logan looks up in surprise thinking, 'why the hell would he be talking to me...?'
"This isn't some joke is it?" Logan asks, narrowing his eyes into slits.
"Nope. I just felt like doing something nice... But if you don't want a ride..." James trails off glancing at the clock and seeing it was 7:55.
Logan groans before walking over to the passenger seat. "Thanks." Logan mutters buckling his seat belt.
"No worries. Just don't expect this to be a common occurrence." James says with a wink.
James turns up the music and 'Stella' by All Time Low is playing.
" You're only happy when I'm wasted
I point my finger but I just can't place it
Feels like I'm falling in love alone
Stella would you take me home?" James sings along with the song.
Suddenly Logan starts singing too.
"You're only happy when I'm wasted
I point my finger but I just can't place it
Feels like I'm falling in love
When I'm falling to the bathroom floor
I remember how you tasted
I've had you so many times- lets face it
Feels like I'm falling in love alone"
Logan stops singing when he notices James is staring at him with a strange look on his face.
"Sorry." Logan mutters looking down embarrassed.
"Don't be! You have a wicked good voice, and NO ONE I KNOW LIKES ALL TIME LOW!" James says with a smile on his face, while bouncing up and down on his seat.
"Oh, well thanks. You have a good voice too." Logan says, a small smile on his lips.
"Oh, I know this!" James says conceitedly.
Logan only chuckles and they both go back to singing the song. When they arrive at the school they both walk in together, talking to each other.
"James, what you doin with the nerd?" They hear Kendall call out.
"Shut up Knight." Carlos says, mad at the blonde haired boy and jealous of the raven haired boy.
"Why don't you make me retard?" Kendall calls out.
Carlos just rolls his eyes and sits forward, laying his head on the table.
James and Logan just glance between the tan boy and the blonde wondering what just happened.
"I see you have all arrived." The principal says, entering the library. "Now take a seat." He says looking at the still standing James and Logan. "And Carlos, head off the desk."
"You wanted me here early, this is what you get." Carlos mutters, eyes closed.
Logan and James chuckle, but stop when Principal Owens looks at them. They quickly make their way to different tables, James at the table next to Carlos, and Logan at the table next to Kendall.
Carlos lifts his head up and looks at James. He doesn't realize he's staring until James looks at him and raises and eyebrow. Not knowing what to do, Carlos sighs and places his head on his desk.
Meanwhile, Kendall is making faces at Logan, while Logan does them back. James turns around, and at seeing this, tries to hold in his laughter.
Mr. Owens just looks at all of them, while shaking his head sadly.
"I want you to all write me and essay. One page. And please, no talking. I'll be in my office." Mr. Owens says before leaving the library, the doors closing.
"Logan, why don't you just write it for all of us? Well, me and James that is. Let the retard do it himself." Kendall says, smirking when Carlos burrows his head into his arms.
"I have a better idea. Why don't you write it yourself?" Logan says, getting up and grabbing a piece of paper and a pen.
James chuckles at Kendall's astonished look before getting up and grabbing a pen and paper for himself.
Kendall, realizing he wouldn't be able to get the nerd to do his own work, gets up and gets his own. When he walks by Carlos, he hits him, making the latino almost fall out of his seat. Carlos just immediately rights himself, keeping his head on his arms. Logan, feeling sorry for the boy, turns and glares at Kendall. Feeling the glare, Kendall looks at Logan and smirks at the look in his eyes.
"Why don't you leave him the fuck alone?" Logan shouts, angry at the blonde for making someone feel bad.
"What are you going to do about it?" Kendall asks, leaning back in his seat.
He leans back to far, and his cheer goes toppling backwards. After a second of awkward silence they all start laughing. Except for Carlos, whose head is still down. After a while their laughter dies down and Kendall feels like an ass for being mean to Logan.
"Hey, Logan, look... I wanna apologize... I feel bad for all the shit I put you threw..." Kendall says, looking down.
"No worries. I'm used to it." Logan says smiling.
Kendall and Logan stare at each other, getting lost in each other's eyes, as cheesy as it sounds. James looks at them, smiling, before turning his attention to the short latino. Carlos's head was still on his arms, and it looked like his upper half was shaking. Before thinking James gets up and sits next to Carlos, wrapping an arm around his shoulders.
"Hey, what's the matter?" James asks.
Carlos just sighs, shrugging James arm off his shoulder, before standing up and walking to the bathroom. James looks at the retreating back in confusion, before shaking his head and getting up. He follows the shorter man into the bathroom. With his long legs he's able to catch up with him in no time, but staying far enough away for the latino not to realize he was being followed. When Carlos enters the bathroom, James catches the door before it shuts and slips in behind him. He watches as Carlos splashes water on his face. Then Carlos rolls up his sleeves, and James notices blood and bandages. Without meaning to James gasps loudly, causing Carlos to whip around and pull down his sleeves.
"What are you doing following me?" Carlos grounds out angrily.
"I just wanted to make sure you were okay." James replies, his eyes darting to the shirt that was now starting to soak with blood.
"I'm fan-fucking-tastic. Now leave me the hell alone." Carlos says before pushing past James and walking back to his seat.
James quickly follows him and stops short when he sees Logan and Kendall sitting at the same table, talking and laughing like they have been friends forever. He quickly shakes himself before walking over to stand in front of Carlos's table. Feeling a presence Carlos looks up, and glares when he sees James.
"We are talking about this whether you like it or not!" James says to the shorter boy.
"No. We. Are. Not. End of story." Carlos says, glaring up at him.
"What's up James? Why you talking to the reta-." Kendall starts saying, but stops when Logan elbows him in the ribs.
James, who was still looking into Carlos's eyes, sees the hurt fill them when Kendall almost calls him a retard.
"Are you cutting yourself because people call you a retard?" James asks softly.
Just not softly enough. Logan and Kendall hear him and gasp. Kendall gets flooded with guilt and gets up and walks over to the short man. Logan, wanting to see this unfold, and protect Kendall if necessary, gets up too.
"Ha. Ha." Carlos laughs mockingly. "Don't think this was your doing Kendall. I wouldn't want to make you feel proud of yourself.
"I-I d-don't feel p-proud." Kendall stutters out.
Carlos just rolls his eyes before getting up and walking towards the back of the library where the nice, comfy chairs were positioned. Logan, James, and Kendall all follow him and sit in the extra chairs next to his. Coincidently, they were positioned so they could all look at each other easily. The seating was Carlos, James, Logan, and Kendall.
"Will you guys leave me the fuck alone?" Carlos yells, getting mad at not being able to be left alone.
"No Carlos. If you need help we're here for you." Logan says, giving him a small smile.
Carlos rolls his eyes, and tilts his head back.
"Why do you get so offended when people call you a retard? Well... I mean I guess I can see it, but why did it force you to start cutting yourself?" James asks him.
"Fuck it." Carlos mutters before looking at them. "I have dyslexia. Plus I where a helmet. Do you know how much I get teased? My own family calls me retarded. Do you know what it's like coming to a place where you get fun of everyday and then going home to get made fun of? To have no friends because everyone is afraid of being made fun of for hanging out with me?"
"How come no one knows about your dyslexia?" Kendall asks.
"Oh should I just come to school and say, 'Oh guess what everyone! I have dyslexia! Now you can make fun of me for that too!' Yea, I'll pass." Carlos says sarcastically.
"Why did you turn to cutting yourself?" Logan, being the smart guy that he is, asks.
"It happened accidently. I was cutting some carrots and the knife slipped. The pain made me feel good." Carlos says.
"Can I take a look at your wrist? That seems pretty bad." Logan asks, wanting to be a doctor, he knew what he was doing.
Without answering Carlos rolls up his sleeves for Logan. They all gasp at all the new cuts and all the old scars.
"When was the last time you did this?" James asks.
"This morning after my brother woke me up." Carlos answers truthfully, deciding against lying.
"And when did you start?" Kendall asks.
"Fifth grade..." Carlos says, a few tears slipping out.
"How come no one noticed you were depressed?" James asks, getting up to sit on the arm of Carlos's chair.
"People only see what they wanna see. They don't wanna see some one depressed. So I hid everything behind a smile." Carlos says, looking down at the raven haired boy bandaging his arm.
When his arm is all bandaged Logan stands up, smiling at him, and goes back to his own seat. There's a few minutes of silence where everyone just thinks.
"So, since you guys know about my deep dark secret, what about you?" Carlos asks, painting a smile onto his face.
They can all see the utter hopelessness in his eyes, and are surprised they hadn't noticed it before.
"Well, mine isn't as bad as yours... Not even close actually..." Kendall starts off, but trails when all eyes focus on him. "My dad died when I was five. He got in a car accident... because of me..."
"How is it because of you?" Logan asks, wrapping an arm around Kendall.
"We were in the car after hockey, and he had finally been able to see me play, he was in the army. I was all excited because we had won, and he told me that it wasn't that big of a deal. I got mad about it and told him he had no idea how happy I was and it was a big deal for me. He told me it was only pee wee hockey and that when I won big time he would be excited. I unbuckled and ran out of the car when we stopped at a red light. He sat in the car waiting for the light to turn green, and when it did, he started to drive... and then a 8-wheeler ran threw the red light, hitting my dad. The car flipped over a couple of times... And it was all my fault..." Kendall says, tears falling out of his eyes.
"It wasn't your fault. You shouldn't blame yourself. And winning that game was a big deal. Don't forget that." Logan whispers, kissing Kendall's head.
"I know... He thought it was a big deal too... He was lying... When my mom came and picked me up and we went back to the house, I found out he had organized a party for me..." Kendall says, his head down, looking defeated.
Logan whispers something into Kendall's ears, causing Kendall to look up and smile. He kisses Logan on the cheek before pulling back and blushing. Logan smiles and kisses Kendall on the look sweetly.
"Aww." Carlos and James say together, causing Logan and Kendall to pull away.
"Shuddup. And it's your turn James." Kendall says, sticking his tongue out.
"Blah. Thought you forgot about that..." James says. "Well, you guys know I only moved here freshman year right?" James pauses while they all nod their heads. "Well, before that I got made fun of for my weight. I used to be obese. No one wanted to talk to me and I got teased. My own family pretended they didn't know me when we went out. So Seventh grade I asked if I could go to fat camp. My parents said yea because they could barely stand looking at me. It took me till them middle of eighth grade to lose all the weight, and I went back to school. I though everything would start over... I was wrong... Everyone remembered me and made fun of me for going to fat camp... It didn't matter that I looked good now... My dad said I made this family a disgrace and started cheating on my. My mom stood up for me and said he made the family a disgrace. Me and her moved here shortly after that and I felt like, if I didn't become the bully, then everyone would be mean to me all over again... I'm sorry I made fun of you guys..."
There was silence for a second before Carlos wrapped his arms around James torso.
"Don't worry about it. If I was in your position I probably would've done the same thing." Carlos says with a smile.
"Thanks..." James whispers staring into Carlos's eyes.
"KISS KISS KISS!" Logan and Kendall chant together.
Carlos looks down embarrassed, but James just grabs his chin and pecks his lips softly. They both gasp at the intensity of it and pull back. They hear "aww" coming from Logan and Kendall. Carlos burrows his head in the crook between James neck and shoulder embarrassed. James just sticks his tongue out saying, "Don't be jealous."
Kendall rolls his eyes while pulling Logan closer.
"Your turn Loganator." Carlos says pulling away from James neck.
"Oh... umm..." Logan starts rubbing his neck awkwardly. "My dad beats me..."
"WHAT?" Kendall yells causing Logan to jump a little.
"It started when my mom died... He blamed me and started to do drugs and drink... It wasn't bad at first... A punch here, a slap there... But then he found out I was gay... It steadily got worse... Sometimes I thought about just killing myself... But I knew that wasn't the answer... If I did all I would've done was give him what he wanted... And I wanted to live my life." Logan tells them, looking down at his shoes.
"You're coming to live with me." Kendall says with authority.
"What?" Logan looks at him like he's crazy.
"I didn't stutter boy! You're living with me! End of story!" Kendall says, pulling Logan in close.
Logan seeing the determination in his eyes, just nods, a smile crossing his face.
"You two are precious!" Carlos says, bouncing slightly in his seat.
He suddenly gets up and starts walking, back and forth, back and forth.
"Umm... Carlos? You okay?" Kendall asks, raising an eyebrow.
"Hmm.. Oh yea. I just have ADHD. I kinda forgot to take my meds... I just realized how crazy that is... I'M GONNA GO GET MY HELMET!" Carlos yells before running to the tables.
"And I'm going after them. Have fun." James says, winking at the two boys.
James sees Carlos strapping on his helmet and quietly sneaks up on him. He wraps his arms around Carlos's torso and kisses his neck.
"Ello James." Carlos says, leaning back into his touch.
"Hi." James replies smiling.
Carlos smiles and turns around, placing a quick kiss to his mouth. When Carlos backs away, James leans down following him, placing quick, sloppy kisses on his mouth.
"Hey cut it out!" They hear Kendall say, followed by laughter.
"You're just jealous you don't got my exotic spice!" James says sticking his tongue out.
"Naw! You're jealous you don't got my cream puff!" Kendall says in reply.
Logan and Carlos burst out laughing when they hear what they were being called. It gets quiet between Kendall and James when they realize what they said and start laughing too.
"Hey guys! It's 1! We can go now!" Carlos says happily, grabbing his backpack and running towards the door.
"Carlos wait!" Logan yells, causing Carlos to run into a wall.
Carlos quickly jumps up, turns around and gives Logan a questioning look.
"We didn't write anything." Logan explains.
"It's okay Mr. Henderson. You boys can go." Mr. Owen says coming from behind Kendall.
Kendall screams like a girl before turning around with his hands in front of his face in a ninja pose. When he sees it's Mr. Owens he lowers his hands, smiles, and grabs Logan. James smiles and runs to catch up to Carlos, wrapping his arm around Carlos's shoulders, while Carlos wraps his around his waist. They all make their way outside before saying bye, and leaving the parking lot.
"I'm glad this detention helped them find each other..." Principal Owens says sighing happily.
Soo... How was it?
And I feel super bad about not updating in a long time! DON'T THROW TOMATOES AT ME!
...cuz I don't like em'! You can throw chocolate at me though! I like that!
Review please and thank yous!
~michelle (: