"Who do you have to sleep with around here to get the morning off work?"
Ryan's words, which seemed playful to Zee and Cole, actually had a hard edge to them and were directed at the two people who gazes were currently locked in surprise.
"Apparently, I'm sleeping with the wrong man, seeing as I had to open the clinic this morning." Cole took issue with Zee's statement and nipped at her neck in retaliation. "Seems that our fearless leader stormed off at opening time to give one of his new recruits hell." Zee had no idea of the can of worms she was opening. She had no reason to look for any hidden meaning behind Ryan's words.
Lily's discomfort apparent, she tore her gaze from Keeton's and said to no one in particular, "I'll just get rid of my pack and get to work," walking away from the group of senior doctors.
"Hmm, I wonder what's up with her? Maybe she woke up on the wrong side of the bed?" Ryan's seemingly innocent comment was loaded with meaning, and didn't sit well with Keeton. What did she know? He grabbed her arm and said, "Dr. Clark, can I talk to you for a moment, please." It wasn't a question as he practically dragged Ryan to his office, knowing he'd need a measure of privacy for this conversation.
"Is there a problem, Dr. Keeton?" Ryan asked sweetly.
"You tell me," was his response.
"I told you that you wouldn't be lonely long, but you could have at least had the decency to tell me first about you and Brenner."
"Tell you what about me and Brenner? That last night she was so out-of-her-mind with fever that I tucked her into bed and stayed up almost all night trying to settle her? Is that what you want me to tell you?" Sure, it was only part of the truth, but providing all of the details would be hurtful, and caring as he did about Ryan, he didn't want to be the cause of that pain.
"I saw you, Ben." Christ, how much did she see? "I saw you at her bedside, and to me it didn't look like just a doctor caring for his patient. Words came out of your mouth that I've never heard before - at least you never said them to me. And it wasn't just the words, Ben. It was the way you said them – like you were making a promise."
Damn it, Keeton thought, running his hand over his face. She was right…about everything. He had no idea what Lily felt, or even if she felt anything beyond simple attraction, but Keeton knew that he'd been forever changed by his new doctor. Knowing that a part of him would always love Abby, he now felt ready to move forward and give himself permission to feel again. It didn't stop him from feeling like crap for hurting Ryan, though.
"Clark, I'm sorry. Please know that I didn't go looking for this. It just happened. She just happened." One resume out of hundreds, and here Lily was turning his world upside down with her tightly bundled hair and her uniform of cargos and tank tops, with her beauty and her capacity to care, her instincts and her competence, and her vulnerability. "I care about you, Ryan, but what you and I have isn't enough anymore and you..."
"…I'm not the one who can give you what you need. I'm not Lily Brenner." Ryan finished Keeton's sentence for him.
"I was going to say that you deserve so much more than whatever this is between us – sex and fights and running away. It wasn't working, Ryan," he finished quietly.
"I know, but knowing that doesn't make it any easier." Clark had a feeling things would end this way when she first met Lily Brenner. Not when she stole Lily's cab, but when they met at the waterfall and later when she noticed Keeton's reaction to her. Coming in a distant second was never a good feeling, especially when she had given so much of her heart to Keeton. He was just never as invested as she.
"Will you stick around, this time? Do you still want to work here?" Keeton asked, hoping that he wouldn't lose a great physician.
"Giving back to this area is very important to me, Keeton. I came here for a reason, and as long as that reason still exists, I'll stick around. I didn't come here for you, so get over yourself," Ryan made a half-hearted attempt to tease, downplaying the ache in her heart.
Reaching out to wrap his arms around his friend and employee, Keeton said, "I'm glad you're staying."
It was at that moment that Lily walked by his office and saw the two doctors in an embrace - so much for confronting Keeton about last night. Obviously, what she had experienced were just dreams. Lily felt silly for imagining otherwise. Tamping down her disappointment, she mentally scolded herself for jumping to conclusions.
Keeton's eyes rose to meet hers before she could make a hasty retreat.
Something about the look in her eyes made his stomach tighten. Was it dejection or resignation he saw? Damn it. "Brenner…" he started, trying to explain.
"I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt. Umm…Cole needs me out in the field so I'm…just…going to go," Lily offered lamely. Turning, she walked across the veranda and down the stairs, jumping in the back of the truck. Keeton was out the door and down the stairs, but not quick enough. Banging on the top to let Cole and Mina know she was ready to go, she held Keeton's gaze as the truck drove away.