Chapter 7: It is better to have loved and lost...

It was a relaxing place to be. The smell of hay wafted through the air and the well worn wood walls and floor made it feel peaceful. But tonight was anything but peaceful for Clark Kent. Tonight he felt the weight of everything he was, lying squarely on his shoulders. The burden of responsibility and the pain of loneliness that went along with it. Things had just started to go right and then everything came crashing down, again.

"Clark I didn't know you were back yet. It's kind of early isn't it?" Martha Kent said coming up the stairs to the loft. She was holding a screwdriver in one hand and a package of screws in another.

"Yeah, my evening got cut kinda short."

She could tell that something was wrong. She may not be his biological mother but she had raised Clark from a toddler and probably knew him better then he knew himself and right now she could tell that he was hurting from something.

"Clark, honey, what's the matter?" She said sitting down next to him.

Clark looked over at her. "How do you do that? How do you always know when something is wrong?" The barest flicker of a smile coming to his face.

"Its a mothers prerogative to always know whats going on in the mind of her only son." She said giving him her own little smile. "Besides from the looks of the situation it's not really that hard to guess."

Clark actually chuckled slightly at that one.

He looked over at her again, turned his head back and took a deep breath.

"I got the 'lets just be best friends' speech from Chloe tonight."

"Oh Clark I'm so sorry." She knew how much Clark wanted to be with Chloe. This must have crushed him.

"Did she say anything, I mean about why?"

"She didn't say exactly but I know what the problem is. It's the same problem I always have. My secret." She could hear the frustration in his voice.

"What do you mean Clark." She said, even though she already had an idea of what the problem was.

"You know what I mean mom. Every time I use my powers I end up having to lie about the situation. I had to just leave Chloe at the dance and because she doesn't know the real reason why she has to make up the story in her own mind. I was the only one who could have saved Lana, but she doesn't know that and now look what happens. I know she thinks there is more to me and Lana then there really is but there isn't anyway to convince her without telling her the truth." An exasperated sigh leaving his lips. "I would give anything to just have normal problems."

He got up and moved towards the window, staring out into the clear night sky. He turned around and looked at her.

"It just seem like it's going to be this way forever and I wonder what's the point. Maybe its just better if I never even try."

Martha got up and walked over to him. "Well I can tell you right now that that's not true. Clark sometimes people try to push away the things that might hurt them because they are afraid of getting hurt. Do you want to be with Chloe?"

"Yes" He said.

"Then you need to tell her that. Show her thats it's her you want and not Lana. Relationships are not an easy thing Clark. You may not be together forever and there is always the possibility you are going to get hurt taking the chance. But if you never take the chance of getting hurt then you never take the chance of being happy. If you want to be more then just friends with Chloe then you are going to have to risk the possibility that you might lose her as a friend and she is going to have to do the same. 'It is better to have loved and lost then never to have loved at all' It's a cliché I know, but it's still true."

Clark turned back around towards the window. "You know it's funny, I have all these powers and in the end it's a little thing like love that hurts me the most."

Martha just smiled at him "Clark someday you'll realize that love is the most powerful thing on the planet, any planet. Now come on, its getting late, lets go back inside and see if your father has eaten all the left over pie."

The next day...

Clark was staring off into space when Pete walked into class.

"Hey there you are. Where you been all morning man? I've been looking everywhere. Clark? Hey wake up bro." Pete puts his hand on Clark's shoulder. The contact brought him out of his thoughts.

"What…? Oh hey Pete, sorry about that. I was... thinking about something." He gave a little smile.

"You all alright Clark?"

"What...Oh no I'm fine, just thinking about something."

"Ok. Anyway you seen Chloe today?" Pete asks opening his science text.

"Why! What have you heard?" Clark asked his voice tinged with fear

"Alright what happened?" He knows something is going on now. Clark is rarely this jumpy and when he is something is almost certainly wrong and it's usually his fault.

"It's just… I mean…You see." Coherent sentences were lost to him. He took a deep breath and started again. "Chloe broke up with me last night." There he had finally said it.

Before he could elaborate on the thought though the bell rang and class started. Mr. Conrad not one for pleasantries started right in. "Alright by now I am sure that most of you have heard about the little incident that happened yesterday. The perpetrators will be caught and punished accordingly. If any of you has any information about it please come to either me or the Principle. All information will of course be kept confidential. Alright, now with that out of the way let's get back to our instructions on dissection." He looked up from his notes and stared at the back of the class. "Mr. Voss would you care to elaborate on your choice of eye wear?"

The entire class turned and looked at Chris. He was wearing a long sleeve shirt and dark pants, not entirely strange but he was also wearing a pair of dark sunglasses. Set against the pale white of his skin the contrast was considerable.

"Sorry sir, my contacts were damaged and these were the only prescription glasses that I could find." His voice was flat and held very little emotion to it.

Mr. Conrad looked at him for a moment and the turned back to the chalkboard. "Fine, back to dissection. As you can see here…"

Class went on with out anymore interruptions. Clark heard none of it though. He was lost in his own thoughts the entire time, but as class came to a close a small smile came to his face. The bell rang and Clark and Pete got up to talk to Chris about Mr. Bunny hoping they could get some more insight into what happened for the article. As they got close though they could see Chris moving quickly out of the room.

"That's weird." Pete said staring after Chris.

"Yeah I know and I've known Chris Voss for a couple years now and I have never seen him wear glasses." He probably would have thought about it in more detail if there weren't other pressing matters at hand. Pete looks over and slaps him on the chest.

"So details man, details. What did you do?" Pete said. Clark could tell by his tone that Pete was concerned but he didn't want to get into it.

"I didn't do anything Pete. But I do need some advice."

He looked at Clark skeptically, when it came to Chloe it was almost always his fault.

"Advice on what?" He said. Clark looked at him a smile spreading across his face again.

"I have a plan."