Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
A/N: This is Bella's perspective of a one-shot, originally entered in the TFLN competition, entitled Exclusively. Edward's POV (Chapter one) of Exclusively WON the contest!
~0~
*Bella Swan*
I'll be there in 30 to do your makeup. I promise no glitter, lol.
Alice. Why did I agree to this again? Oh, that's right; I just can't seem to say no to Alice. I texted back.
I'm not feeling too well. Maybe I shouldn't go. I'll just be the third-wheel.
Going to a funky bar with Alice and my brother Jasper was not my idea of a fun night out, especially since they got engaged. Before they were together it was enlightening watching their interactions with each other. Now it was just a painful reminder that I was single, and not likely to meet anyone anytime soon.
Nice try. Don't forget to wear your new shoes with thick socks for at least 20 minutes – GO!
I sat on the bed and looked at the outfit Alice had made me buy at Barney's. It was very beautiful, but the skirt was really short, and the silk tank was, quite low-cut. Jasper will freak out when he see's me and I'll spend the entire night worrying about flashing my panties, or tripping in these four inch heels that are basically a health-hazard for me, Bella Swan - Miss Uncoordinated, 2010.
Tonight is going to be excruciating, and I don't just mean wearing the shoes!
~0~
Alice and I got out of the cab and walked down the little dark alley arm-in-arm. I needed her support, in case I tripped on the uneven sidewalk, or just forgot to place one foot in front of the other.
Apparently, my other best friend Rosalie made her boyfriend Emmett arrange for us to have a table reserved. Emmett was gym-buddies with the door guy, and usually this particular bar was quite hard to get into, if you weren't the 'right' type of person.
I had been more than annoyed with Rosalie recently, as she had started concocting little 'outings' as she called them, to lunch and drink and be 'seen'. She told me I wasn't going to the 'right' places to 'meet someone'.
Both Rosalie and Alice had never, ever been concerned with my meeting someone before. Now Alice was engaged (thanks to my introduction) to my brother and Rosalie was 99% certain Emmett would propose to her when they went away to the Hamptons in two weeks.
Suddenly, it seemed my being unattached was old fashioned and outdated.
We weren't in our insulated Sorority anymore. Back when the three of us met in college, we were innocent teens from small towns that had moved to the Big Apple to make our mark. Back then it was all about academic success, and supporting each other as we adjusted to life in New York. It was not about meeting boys.
It's not like there were many options in the boyfriend department anyway. The guys we met were living the life, drank too much and partied more than they studied.
We had made a pact that we would never just 'give away' our virginity. We didn't go fanatical and get purity rings or anything, but we promised each other that we would find the man of our dreams before we had sex. I mean, why sleep with someone you weren't in love with? Why just give your virginity away to some horny frat boy who would be too drunk to remember the next day?
Well, now both Rosalie and Alice had found their dream men, and raved on and on about how wonderful it was that they waited. That was until Alice started asking me who I would take to the wedding…and wouldn't it be nice if I met a nice young man, had a fling, experienced the 'Sex and the City' single life. Now they were taken, they wanted to live vicariously through me, and apparently, I wasn't adventurous or spontaneous enough for them.
Rosalie had even implied that I was too picky. They suggested I just go ahead and 'do the deed already'.
We walked through the door and the waitress showed us to our reserved plush lounge seat. Alice and I ordered one of their specialty cocktails, and as I tried to focus in the dim lighting of the bar, my right contact lens felt like it was slipping. I stupidly rubbed my eye and smudged my eyeliner and mascara. We hadn't even been there five minutes.
"Bella you look like someone just back-handed you." Alice huffed at me.
"I need to change my contact lens Alice, I can barely focus." Lucky I packed everything I would need for this type of emergency. "I'll be right back."
I walked passed the bar unsteadily and slowly to the restroom. I tried to not hunch my shoulders, but I just felt really uncomfortable in this too cool bar with people that were too cool for me.
Snap out of it Bella, you really only have to suffer through a couple of hours. No big deal, just have a few drinks and then head home.
I hurried in, and thank goodness the one restroom was vacant. I huffed when I got inside, then had a quick pee. As I sat there I berated myself for not at least trying. Alice and Rosalie had gone out of their way to encourage me to get out and meet people and here I was wearing the most beautiful outfit I owned. I couldn't help but run my fingers over the soft silk of my skirt. It really did make my skinny legs look shapelier.
I rummaged in my bag and found my perfume; I sprayed a little on my wrists and then tried looking for my replacement contacts and those little makeup remover towelettes that Alice insisted I buy when we were in Henri Bendel.
I flushed the toilet and then looked for a mirror, but there wasn't one. Damn, I'll have to replace my contact and fix my makeup in front of people. Jeez, I hate unisex restrooms!
I walked to the door still trying to find my disposable contacts. God, I hope the black eye smudge isn't too bad.
When I got to the basin I placed my bag on the side and instantly found the makeup remover towelettes. In no time at all I had clean hands, and smudge-free eyes that could actually focus.
OK, that's so much better. Now, Bella Swan, go back to the table, enjoy your drink and convince Alice you are having a super time, I mentally asserted.
"You really look hot Bella," Alice gushed as I sat down next to her.
"Thanks Alice. I love this skirt, thanks for convincing me to buy it."
"The color is great on you, I was thinking that maybe we could go with the same color theme for the bridesmaid's dresses?" she did that excited thing where her vocal pitch raised a few octaves and she sounded like a teenager.
Oh no, please, not more wedding talk! It was bad enough about her talking venues and flowers and wines, while she did my makeup.
"Sure Alice, that sounds great," I hoped I didn't sound too dismissive, as I changed the subject. "So, tell me what are your plans with Jasper this evening and how are you going to get him there?"
Alice proceeded to tell me the ins and outs of what she arranged for their special night out, with the help of Rosalie. I nodded and 'umm-ed' and 'ahh-ed' in all the right places, but my mind had kind of switched off as I swizzled around my cocktail straw.
My new shoes were too tight, and I was getting pins and needles in my toes. I tired bouncing my leg up and down, but it really wasn't helping. Damn beautiful sexy shoes.
"So Bella, have you noticed, there are so many cute guys in here." She giggled.
"Oh, really. I hadn't noticed." Which was actually the case. This didn't seem like the place I'd find a poet or arty-type intellectual or a musician. I wanted to meet someone who at least had the same interests as me.
"That's your problem Bella; you know it's not all Disney Princes with hearts and flowers. You need to be a little more open minded."
"Open minded? Says the girl that tried to set me up with the beefcake mechanic!" I scoffed.
"What do you mean Bella, he was lovely!" Alice looked shocked.
"I'm sorry Alice, but I draw the line at black greasy, jagged fingernails. It was, he was just…" The horrific recollection of Jacob's stubby and dirty hands sent an unpleasant shiver down my spine.
"I at least want to meet someone who has the courtesy to scrub the filth from their hands before they take me out on a date! That's not too much to ask for, is it Alice? And I want to feel like I have some type of connection, someone that ignites some type of spark."
"Bella, not all of us see fireworks when our soul mates come into view. I certainly didn't with -"
"Jazz!" Alice leapt from the seat to throw her arms around my brother's neck.
Jasper nodded to me with an amused smile as he took in my outfit. I raised my eyebrow. I at least knew he wouldn't have the guts to say anything negative in front of Alice.
"Hello Beautiful," he purred in her ear.
I couldn't help but smile. They really were the perfectly matched; and even though Alice had turned into a mild bridezilla since they'd gotten engaged, I knew that they would be insanely happy together, as husband and wife.
"Hey honey, I'm so glad you're here. What do you think of Bella's outfit? I styled her myself and did her makeup!" Alice beamed at me and wrapped her arms around Jasper's waist.
"Um, well Bella, you look...different." Jasper looked down at my shoes, and smiled. "I don't think you should stand up though. How did you actually walk from the cab in here without falling and scraping your knees?" he laughed.
"Very funny, ha ha! That joke is getting old." I pouted.
Yes, it was a running joke about my clumsiness. I'm actually surprised that my knees weren't permanently scarred from the childhood cuts and scrapes caused by falling over, tripping, or skidding off my bike.
"So, what's in those concoctions anyway?" he gestured to my glass.
"I don't know but it's absolutely scrumptious, and I'm ready for another." I stated, remembering my affirmation; I am going to have a good time.
"Jasper? Jasper Whitlock?" I looked up to see a man. I blinked a couple of times in the dim lighting. He was tall, slightly taller than Jasper, and he had gorgeous bronze hair, it was longish and 'stylized' messy. He had long sideburns, slight stubble of facial hair, defined Adams apple, perfect white teeth. He was smiling at my brother in recognition. He was boyish, yet sexy at the same time and that smile was jaw-dropping. He was beautiful.
How in the hell does Jasper know a male model?
"Edward?" Japer responded, as if he didn't believe his eyes.
"Hey, imagine running into you after all these years? You look like you haven't aged a day!" the cadence of his voice was almost musical, melodic.
Jasper untangled himself from Alice to shake his hand.
"That was a lifetime ago Edward." Jasper laughed.
Edward looked about the same age as Jasper, around twenty-seven, twenty-eight.
I watched as he held his hand to Alice.
"Hi, I'm Edward. Jasper and I studied at NYU together, yeah, a lifetime ago." Alice practically shook his arm off. Did she just check out his fingernails?
"I'm Jaspers fiancé, Alice," she was all giggly and I took in a breath. God Alice, show some decorum. She motioned her hand to me.
"This is my friend Bella." I was surprised she didn't say, 'this is my single friend who's still a virgin and who needs to get laid, take her home now.'
Edward looked down at me; his eyes were staring into mine intently. Poise, Bella.
I uncrossed my legs slowly, trying not to flash him my panties. I placed my drink down on the table and reached out to shake his hand.
I felt it, as soon as my skin connected with his. It was like a zap of static electricity, but rather than zapping one point, it was like my whole hand was zapped and I couldn't help but flinch from the shock of it. My eyes immediately looked to his hand. It was large; he had the most beautifully elegant fingers. His hand was soft but his fingertips were slightly calloused, as if he played the guitar. They were the most beautiful hands I had ever laid eyes on and his touch was making my belly go all jittery and anxious.
My God, I can feel myself getting aroused.
I knew my face was flaming red. I couldn't drag my eyes away from his beautiful, perfect hands.
"It's lovely to meet you, Bella." his voice was like honey, sensual, and smooth. He was still holding my hand and I wanted to let it go, but I couldn't seem to get my brain to make it happen.
"Join us Edward? Unless you're meeting someone else?" Alice's voice brought me out of my trance. Edward let go of my hand, the tingling aftermath of that intense feeling unnerved me. My whole hand felt like it had pins and needles. I clutched my skirt, desperately flexing my hand to try and get it back to normal.
"I'm sure Edward was just on his way out, Alice," I heard Jasper, he sounded rude and I looked up. He did that funny brow crease thing. Alice called it his 'pissy face'. Jasper must not like Edward that much or maybe it was more that he didn't want me to like him?
Edward didn't take any notice of Jasper, and I could almost visualize Alice scheming on how to hook me up with the Adonis male model standing almost within touching distance.
"Actually Jasper, I just set up a tab at the bar, so I insist on buying you all a drink." He motioned to the waitress, and then before I knew it, he was sitting next to me. I could feel the warmth radiating the whole right side of my body. I could smell his cologne. God I'm so aroused. I could feel myself aching for him.
This can't be happening, the one time a man actually sparks some type of desire in me and he's a freaking male model that just must have a girlfriend.
"So, Bella, are you a student?" he asked me. His eyes were a blue green endless ocean. His tone was friendly and casual. Yes, he's just being nice; he most definitely has a girlfriend.
"Umm, no, I graduated last year." I said. I stupidly looked at his hands again, they were resting palm down on his knees. I had the most insanely compulsive desire to grab one and bring it to my mouth.
"Bella and I also went to NYU, didn't we Bella?" Alice's voice slapped me out of my delusional state. God, she's switched into matchmaking mode. Now she's the one that's delusional. This beautiful, sexy walking homage to all that is wholly desirable and perfect in a man, will not want to suffer me, tripping on his huge feet, spilling my drink on his designer pants, or some other typical Bella faux pas that was likely to happen any second, just because I am me and he is...a fucking Disney Prince!
He started talking to Jasper, whose pissy face would occasionally reappear in between Edward reminding him of the outrageous antics they got up to when they were at NYU.
I was shocked, as it seemed as though they used to be quite close. I knew Jasper used to be a bit of a player when he was younger. It was like he had a different girl every week, yet none of them were worthy enough for him to bring to visit when we got together for family time over major holidays.
They laughed. Edward was doing a good job at loosening Jasper up. Then Alice went into her zone as the matchmaking Queen, as soon as Jasper excused himself to go to the restroom.
"Do you have a girlfriend Edward?"
"No, unfortunately. You know Alice; women usually assume I have a girlfriend, based purely on my looks. They convince themselves that I'm not single, so they don't often come and talk to me. I find it really difficult sometimes to meet people. I'm so glad I recognized Jasper, or I would have probably ended up heading off early." He sounded genuine, but I had a feeling he was telling her what she wanted to hear.
Alice grinned. "You know Edward, Bella has that exact same problem. She doesn't realize how gorgeous she is and most guys just think she would be in a relationship, so they don't bother talking to her, isn't that right Bella?" God Alice, could you make me sound even more pathetic and shy?
I could feel my face flaming red. "Umm, well, sometimes…I suppose." Fuck, what was I doing? I was a fake, my clothes, my makeup, everything. Talk about misrepresenting myself. Edward had no clue that I was a shy copy editor that preferred to spend my evenings at home with my cat Meyer and a good book. I hardly ever wore makeup. My hair was usually a frizz of wavy knots, and this outfit was the most expensive thing I owned!
I was not who he thought I was.
Jasper returned and then Alice was dragging him to the dance floor, deliberately leaving me alone with Edward. She's so predictable.
"Edward!"
I looked up to see a glamour couple. He was immaculately dressed, sexy smirk and natural healthy tan. You could see from the tight strain of his shirt over his chest that he was muscular and super fit. The girl hanging off him was gorgeous; she had the most shockingly vibrant auburn hair, and the most stunning dress I had seen all night. They looked like they could have just stepped off the cover of Harper's Bazaar.
"James, are you heading off?" inquired Edward.
"Um, yeah, you?" he replied. I had thought Edward was here alone, but he must have been with the glamour couple, who looked very close.
"I'll probably head off soon. This is Bella, Bella this is James and Victoria."
"Hello," I smiled at them. I nervously crossed my legs, my ankle inadvertently brushed against Edward's leg. The sensation sent a jolt through me. The tingling ache between my thighs was unbearable. I had never been so tuned on in my life.
"It was lovely to meet you Victoria. I'm sure I'll see you again soon?"
I was confused. I thought they were a couple, but Edward made it sound like he had just met her, so maybe he wasn't as friendly with the couple as I thought? Or, James had just met Victoria and was taking her home?
Of course, that's what happened in the real world. Men and women met in bars like this and went home together. Then I looked at Edward's beautiful and perfect hands and I wished that they could be on me, touching me. When was I ever going to meet a male model that I was attracted to not only intellectually but also sexually? It hadn't happened in my entire life and I was twenty-two.
I want him. He is beautiful. When he touched me I felt the spark. I looked to him, his unruly, yet stylized hair, his mesmerizing eyes, his kissable lips, I knew I'd regret not being with him. I wanted it to be him. I wanted him. Just ask him Bella, if he says no, well, at least you tried.
"Edward, can I ask you a huge favor?" I rushed through the words, conscious that if I hesitated, I just may talk myself out of this crazy thing I was about to do.
"Um, yeah? Well, no, it depends on what it is," he looked curious, his voice sounded weird.
"Jasper won't let me make my own way home, he always wants to take me, to make sure I'm like, OK, and not walking the streets looking for a cab. Problem is, I know Alice has something special planned for them tonight, and she'll want him to leave soon, so I thought if maybe you can reassure Jasper that you'd make sure I got home safely, he wouldn't worry as much and that would really make Alice's night." I thought of Edward walking me to my door, and then I felt almost faint as I visualized grabbing his hands, his beautiful perfect hands.
"Why would Jasper be so protective of you, I mean I'm sure you're capable of getting in a cab aren't you Bella?"
"Yes, of course I am, but you know what brothers are like, um, he, you know plays the big brother card on me all the time." Jasper's over protective nature was something that I had lived with my entire life, he was certainly not going to stop now, but at least he knew Edward. It's not like he was a complete stranger.
"Brother?" he couldn't hide his shock.
"Half-brother actually, we have the same mother." Well, if he didn't know I was Jasper's sister then maybe they weren't as close as I had thought?
"Sure Bella, let's just see what Jasper says, I'm happy to escort you home or at the very minimum ensure you actually get into a cab."
I smiled with relief. At least he's willing to do that much.
Alice dragged Jasper back to stand in front of us. She kind of winked at me, indicating it was time for them to go. "So, Jazz and I are heading off Bella," I could tell she was excited about her plans for tonight.
I played along. "Really, so early? I think I'll stay here with Edward for a while." My brain was obviously not connected to my hand that seemed to have a mind of it's own when it reached out and placed itself over Edward's on his thigh.
Oh God, the feel of his skin!
"No, I'm sure Edward was going to leave, right Edward?" Jasper practically spat.
Fuck! Great going Bella, self-sabotage, why didn't you just keep your hands to yourself! I was crushed that I had basically just completely fucked up any chance of Jasper letting me leave with Edward.
"Yeah, I should really head off too. Um, I'll just go and fix up the tab." Edward squeezed my hand, sending another jolt through my body and between my thighs. Then he got up and walked away. The loss of his radiating warmth was instantly replaced by Jasper as he shout-whispered in my ear.
"Bella, Edward is a fucking player. He's not boyfriend material. He sleeps with a different woman every night and he's done it for years. He'll no sooner get you naked, get himself off and then leave. You'll never see or hear from him again. I don't want you mixed up with him. He's bad news Bella, he's got a sex addiction or something, it's well, he's just not right for you, OK?"
Jasper's words slowly sunk in. Of course I would have never fooled myself into believing a guy like Edward would have any long term interest in me. Jasper says he sleeps with different women every night...so at least he's experienced. If he's been screwing anything that moves since he could then I'm sure he'd probably come across a few virgins? I wasn't going to fall in love with him; I just wanted him to touch me; his perfect hands all over my body. That's all I wanted, and if I could only have one night, then, so be it. I mean I can't be a virgin forever, and Edward is the only man I've ever met that had aroused me so much that I was practically ready to jump on his lap, just to get some friction between my legs.
"I want you straight in a cab Bella and straight home, do you hear me?" I looked up to Jaspers face. There was no use arguing with him and causing a scene. I looked to Alice, she shrugged, she knew there was no use arguing with Jasper either, so I nodded.
"Sure Jasper, I'll go straight home." I looked over to the bar, Edward's long lean body stood rigid and confident. A tall blonde stood extremely close to him. He can have any woman he wants. He won't want me anyway. I looked away, feeling gutted and worthless.
Edward appeared then, and handed a business card to Jasper.
"Jasper, it's been great running into you, I hope we can keep in contact?" he sounded hopeful.
"Sure Edward," replied Jasper, he didn't seem reluctant. Edward is obviously good enough to be Jasper's friend, but not good enough to get anywhere near me.
"It was lovely to meet you Alice." Edward said, and then he looked to me, "You too Bella." he turned to shake Jasper's hand. "I hope you all enjoy the rest of your evening."
He started to walk away and I felt desperate to stop him.
Alice flashed me a reassuring look. "We're leaving too Edward, wait up." Alice said cheerily. I knew she would try and work something out, but I knew Jasper would be right there, watching her and me. There was no way Edward would be taking me home.
I stood up and brushed my pretty skirt over my legs. What a waste, I'll never be able to wear it again, it will always remind me of this night, the night I finally found someone I wanted, but still went home alone.
We all walked up to Bowery Street and without any hesitation, Jasper hailed a cab and held the door open.
"Bye Bella, thanks for coming out." he said hastily.
Alice brushed passed him and gave me a hug. "Take this, it's Edward's address," she whispered, and placed something in my hand. "Bella, it should be your decision. Regardless of what you decide to do, I love you!"
I couldn't help but smile, as I stared at Edward's sullen face, my heart pounding.
"Goodbye guys, have a fabulous time." I tried to sound casual but inside I was exulting.
I looked at Edward, "Goodbye Edward, thanks for the drinks."
I got in the cab and it started moving instantly.
"Where to?" asked the driver.
I looked at the card. "Ninety-third Street please, between 5th and Park."
I couldn't believe I was actually going to do this. It was spontaneous, it was reckless and completely out of character for me. The copy editor in me started concocting headlines. Virgin Bella Swan turns up on man-whore's doorstep and asks him to have sex with her. Ugly Duckling transforms into a Swan for one night and loses inhibitions! I giggled to myself.
Then I closed my eyes and thought of Edward's hands. I deserved to have those beautiful, experienced hands on my body. My panties were so saturated from desire, I knew if I didn't at least offer myself to Edward, I would always wonder what could have been, and when it came to sex, my imagination was abysmal.
And then I started to panic. What if Edward decided to stay out and find another, more sexually assertive woman to bring home; one that didn't have an annoyingly over-protective brother?
Oh God, I'll be mortified if he brings someone home with him.
I planned it out in my head. I'd wait ten minutes in the cab once we were there and if he didn't show, or was not alone, I'd go straight home.
"Um, I'd just like to wait for a while please. I'm meeting someone." I said to the driver.
"OK," he stated and it was the most anxious five minutes of my life.
Then I saw a cab pull up in front of mine and as soon as I saw Edward's tall frame exit, alone, I threw my driver way too much cash. "If I do not go inside with that man just there, can you wait for me?" I asked the driver.
He looked at the cash. "Sure thing!" he grinned.
I stumbled out and on to the sidewalk. Don't fall over! Don't fall over! I hurriedly crossed the road.
"Edward," my voice was barely audible; he was walking up the stairs.
"Edward!" I said louder.
He stopped walking and looked down at me, shocked. My gut bottomed out. Maybe he doesn't want me?
"Bella, what are you doing here?" Edward walked down the stairs and stood intimately close. "I mean, you were in a cab, you're supposed to be home. How did you know I lived here?"
I held out the card that Alice had given me. "Alice is a great pick-pocket." I stated. "She slipped it to me."
"Why would she do that?" he looked horrified.
Just be honest, ask for what you want Bella, the worst that can happen is he laughs or says no and you can run to that waiting cab and never see him again.
"Well, I…I just thought that maybe you, I mean if Jasper hadn't forced me to get into a cab, that maybe we would have ended up here anyway."
Oh God. I want him.
"I want it to be you, Edward." I took his hand, his beautiful warm hand and I held it, gently squeezing and then rubbing my fingers over his. I could feel that same burning warmth and zapping feeling. God, what would it feel like if his hands were on my naked breasts? I had to kiss his hand, and then I pulled Edwards' hand to glide over my jaw and then I kissed his palm.
Oh God.
Edward was suddenly, urgently pulling me by the hand up the stairs. Oh God, yes.
We were inside, he locked the door. "Can I get you a drink?" his voice was low, seductive.
"No, I just want your hands on me Edward." I practically wrapped my whole body around him, desperate to feel him, to touch him. I couldn't wait. I'd waited too long for this moment.
Then Edward's lips were on me, kissing me feverishly, his soft amazing hands slowly lowering down my body until they were touching my bare thighs.
"Fucking perfection," he whispered.
Then he lifted me easily and was bounding up the stairs to take me to his bedroom. My heart was hammering in my chest, my body aching to feel him. It was surreal. He made me feel so beautiful, he looked at me so intently that it made feel like I was the last female on the planet, and that he was honored to be with me.
He placed me on my feet at the foot of his huge bed. His lips were back on mine, kissing me gently yet with a distinctly arousing urgency. He broke the kiss to start unbuttoning his shirt, so I lifted my top over my head. Then I saw Edward's eyes flash with desire and his beautiful hands covered the fabric of my bra. I could feel the heat of his hands.
Oh God.
"Edward, your hands are so…" I grabbed one of his hands and brought it to my mouth. Tasting him. Oh God, his taste...
Edward slowly pulled his hand away from my mouth, and I literally heard myself moan with displeasure. He then unclasped my bra. It fell to the floor then my skirt. Then Edward was slowly peeling my soaking panties down my thighs, his hands running over my skin as he went.
Oh God, this is really happening. I'm going to lose my virginity!
I watched as he removed the rest of his clothing. I'd seen pictures of naked men, but Edward was spectacular. His long, thick, erect cock was beautiful, well, as beautiful as a cock could be. I didn't feel anxious, I just felt desire and need; a need so overwhelming, I felt lightheaded. I couldn't stop staring at his hands.
"You like my hands?" he observed. He glided one around my waist and assisted me to get onto his bed. I wriggled my body back, so I was in the middle. He stood staring at me, he was glorious.
"Yes, Edward, your hands are so…so…touch me!" I could barely get the words out, I was so turned on, my body was on fire for him.
"Oh Bella, I intend touching you. I'll have my hands on you all night." his hand touched my breast as he gently pushed me backwards, so I would lie down. But instead of laying his body on me, he pulled back and removed one of my shoes.
My relief was palpable. He started massaging my ankle and toes. The feeling of his hands on me, combined with the visual of his fingers as they rubbed my feet was heavenly. I couldn't help but moan. My feet looked so tiny in his large powerful grasp.
And then his hands started inching up my legs, slowly, reverently. My calves, the backs of my knees. Then he bent and kissed my knee. Then my thighs. Oh God, he's going to touch me there soon and I hadn't told him I'm a virgin!
Edward," I moaned. "I…need to tell…God, are you…? I'm a…" Oh God. What if I told him and he stopped?
Suddenly Edward's hot breath was between my legs as he held my thighs apart. His tongue slowly pushed against my pleasure point. "Ed-ward!" I screamed, trying to slam my thighs together. He didn't move, he kept going.
"Stop, please!" the pleasure was too intense. My toes felt like they were being electrocuted!
I felt him pull away, so I relaxed my tense thighs.
"Bella, has any man ever…?"
"No!" I yelped. Oh God, I have to tell him, no man has ever been anywhere near that part of my body.
"Bella, take my hand," he offered me his hand, and I instantly latched onto it and brought it to my mouth. "I want you to relax, and I want you to kiss my hand, caress it, and don't tense up, or I'll take it away."
Oh God, his hand. I moaned and started sucking on his fingers. The soft texture of skin in my mouth was indescribable.
He lowered his head and I felt his hot tongue pushing against me, dipping lower, tasting me and I felt my body reacting, one minute trying to buck my hips away and then involuntarily pushing forward with pleasure. All the while my toes were tingling and the sensation was maddeningly exquisite.
Then he slowly opened me with his fingers and I felt one slide inside me!
Oh God, Edward! My mouth clamped down as I bit unconsciously. I was scared that he might work out that I was still a virgin and stop what he was doing to me.
Instantly he placed a second finger with the first and started pumping them in and out of me slowly and it felt so good!
His tongue kept lapping at my pleasure point whilst his fingers pushed in and out of me and the sensation was driving me insane. I opened my eyes and looked down. His soft bronze hair, his face, eyes closed, he was enjoying this! The sight was enough to make me believe in miracles.
"Arrrrgghhhhhh! Edward!"
I came.
Oh, did I – like never before in my life.
I was disoriented and weak. Edward pulled his fingers slowly from my body. His fingers in my mouth were replaced by his tongue as he kissed me. I could taste myself on his lips. Oh My God!
"Bella, I have to get a condom, I'll be right back." he whispered.
"No!" I instinctively pulled his arm back to me. I didn't want him to leave the room. I needed him on me, now.
His finger went back to tracing my lips and I felt relieved.
"Bella, I always use a condom. I get tested every six months as well. Let me just get one from the bathroom, I'll be less than twenty seconds."
He tried again to pull away from me, but I wasn't going to let his hand go. I wanted him; I wanted to feel all of him. There was no doubt in my mind that Edward was safe, and I knew I was as well. I wanted no barrier. I wanted to feel everything, every sensation.
"I'm sorry, it's just that Alice says that it feels better without one, and so I thought, you could…I mean, I'm disease free and protected against pregnancy…" his fingers were on my lips and I wanted them in my mouth, and I wanted him in my body and I wanted to tell him why, but I was too embarrassed and shy. I sucked his fingers. Holy fuck, I can taste myself again.
I wouldn't let his hand go, but then he shifted so he was between my legs and I panicked.
"Edward, please, can I touch you?" I wanted him; I was still disoriented from my climax. This will be the only time I can be with him. I want to touch his body; I want to remember everything about him.
Edward kind of grunted in protest, but then he slowly rolled onto his back. I quickly straddled him rubbing my sensitive center onto his beautifully engorged cock. It was heavenly.
Edward started running his smooth hands up and down my legs. The heat, the sensation was fantastic, but the sight of those beautiful hands on me was mind blowing. I tried to snap myself out of my stupor. I was trying to drink in everything, but I was on sensory overload. His body underneath me, the feel of his hands, the look on his beautiful face. It was all too much.
My hands slowly started exploring his firm chest, his nipples, and the soft hair that surrounded them. I bent down to lick; the position change pressed his very hard and throbbing erection against my very swollen and sensitive clit. Oh my God, this is so much more amazing than my inexperienced mind could have ever imagined!
Edward groaned and started rocking himself up to me. His hands never stopped gliding slowly over my thighs, intermittently stopping to squeeze and then start rubbing again.
I was desperate, I was on fire, the wet ache between my legs needed friction. I need him.
I pressed my open palm onto his chest and pushed myself up to a sitting position, feeling his hardness, and heat directly between my legs.
"Bella, I want you." Edward grunted, simultaneously pushing his hips off the bed, and slowly sliding me along his length. Oh God, yes!
"Do you want to be on top?" he questioned, his hands flew up to my hips as he gripped them tightly. His face was full of desperation and want.
I wanted to, but I thought that the missionary position should be the way to go, for this, my very first time. "I…oh god…Edward, I…can't be…on top!" I dropped my head, wishing that I could just tell him. Say it Bella, say that you're a virgin! Say it, out loud!
Then Edward lifted me and gently pulled me to lay me on my back. He brushed the hair from my eyes lovingly.
"It's OK, I'm happy to be on top," he breathed.
Oh God, I don't want to risk him stopping if he knows. "Edward, please, just promise me, you won't stop touching me, promise me you won't stop." I pleaded with him.
He smiled at me as he slowly forced my legs apart with his and lined himself up. Then he gently placed his hand behind my neck and removed the pillow. He positioned my arm so he could raise himself up to balance and then he offered me his hand.
Oh God, his fingers. I latched onto his hand and I kissed and sucked on his fingers. I had no idea that I had this overwhelming hand fetish until now. I was reveling in the taste of his skin when I felt him push against me.
This is it!
I tired to stay relaxed but my mind knew there would be pain and reacted instinctively.
"I won't stop touching you, I promise." groaned Edward, as he stared at me.
Then I felt him slowly enter me, gently and it felt so weird and foreign. I continued to pant as I sucked on his beautiful fingers. And then the shooting pain.
He stopped.
No, No, No!
I was distraught; I was overcome with anxiety that he would reject me. He hovered above me, confused, and then he sighed, sending his sweet breath across my face. Oh God!
"I'm sorry, it won't hurt for long. I won't stop…" the words came in slow motion as they sunk in and I realized that Edward still wanted me. I nodded, I tried to relax and then his body weight pushed forward.
Oh God! AHHHHHH!
Shooting pain and blissful sensation combined. He started slowly moving in me and the sensation was initially like a sharp stretching and tearing, then it slowly dulled to a low ache.
"Bella, are you OK?" he almost snarled.
I dragged his fingers from my mouth and panted. "Yes, kiss me, please?"
Edward's lips joined with mine instantly. His hot wet tongue exploring my mouth in between grunts as he slowly thrust in and out. My head was swimming with confusion over the conflicting sensations. The deeper he went the more pleasure I felt and I started raising my hips to silently encourage him to go deeper.
His glorious hand then ran down the back of my right thigh to the underside of my knee and he gently raised it up, allowing himself to slide fractionally deeper.
Oh My God.
"Does this feel OK Bella? You need to tell me if I'm hurting you." the pain was now just a dull ache, the friction from his gentle thrusting was exquisite.
"It…feels, I can't describe, so amazing." I was panting and my voice didn't sound like my own.
Then I gazed in wonder as Edward slowly placed his fingers at my lips, smiling wryly as I sucked them into my mouth instantly.
God, his hands, I could feel the tension building, my heart pounding in my chest. His slow rhythmic thrusting was hypnotizing me, and then he adjusted his hips, pushing himself further up my body. I was going to come again, I could feel it.
Oh God!
Then Edward slowly pulled his fingers from my mouth and I watched in fascination as he very slowly lowered them between us. Just the anticipation of his long fingers touching sent me into a frenzy, and as soon as they made contact I was gone. The orgasm ripped through my body with a pulsing shudder.
"Edward!" I cried, and then I felt his heat. He grunt-breathed as he thrust with more force and I felt him come inside me.
He held himself above me but rested his head against my now sweaty neck. He kissed me, slowly, reverently, and then breathed into my mouth.
"Mine," he moaned.
Oh God!
~0~
A/N: Please leave me a review and tell me which POV you enjoyed the most? I am writing the Exclusively Epilogue for the Fandoms Fight the Floods compilation. To donate to the QLD relief fund and receive the story, please see my Profile page (click on delicious avi top left hand corner). Thanks so much for reading.