Hi.
Okay. I was re-reading some of my reviews, and I realize, there is some really good advice. Thus, when or if I ever do a sequel, or another story, even, I will take into account the differences. For me, the beginning is always hard. Also, I usually write fantasy – magic, unicorns, dragons, evil villains (Wow, that's stupid), fairies, etc. Maybe you can imagine why this was so much harder for me? Hee hee.
Also, I read my chapters again sometime past, and realize, YES, this is DEFINITELY room for improvement. I might not actually correct this one, maybe I will, but if I do, I want ALL of your thoughts on it. :)
Thanks to CunningMascara, Marie_Elaine_Cullen, Tiickle, Riptide2015, RenesmeeHale, Marisje, Calliope's Quill, "not a flame :)", NuclearXsquid, "Crazy :P", Kisstina123, HallowedHallsOfWriting, and all those others who reviewed. To those who gave some good constructive criticism and some bad, thanks. I admit, I overreacted to the ones I found offensive. I'm sorry.
Please, don't take this bad example of my writing skills and refuse to read more. I seem to have problems with writing realistically (Again, one of the main reasons I stick to fantasy! :) ) but it is still fun to write other genres. So, if you hate my writing, sorry. Maybe I can give you another example of it?
Anyway, thanks for making this a great first story. I definitely learned something, and am hoping to gain your approval if I ever write more.
With pen in hand,
Shadow